sarcasm-at-its-finest

anonymous asked:

you in love with jared?

totally, dude!! he’s a hottie. omg!! omg!!!. his eyes. his blue eyes. omg he’s a saint who came down from the heaven and decided to fuck with, us humans, with his youthful look. and don’t get me started with how talented he is. he’s the most beautiful dude ever. holy shit. i tweet him every day to get the attention from him  because i’m not just in love , but so damn obsessed. he’s my hero. i love him so much it hurts my soul and heart.  he’s just so beautiful it hurts to look at him. 

Nope. I’m not in love. It might look like I am. Not sure why. Hm.

Thranduil: I know this must be hard on both of you, going through this again. I apologize. Sincerely.

Gandalf: Well, thank you. I accept your apology. Now can we get on with it, please?

Bard: Wait a minute. Wasn’t it you that gave Thorin a key and a map and a hobbit to go into the mountain where they woke up the dragon that burned down my town before I had a chance to kill it?

Thranduil: Game. Set. Snap.

The Signs As People I Know (Female)

Aries : A friend. Is really talented at everything else that is not related to academics, and has very good leadership qualities. Brave, outspoken but secretly still prefers to have someone to rely on and hates being alone or doing stuff all by herself.

Taurus : My Mom. Hardworking but sometimes pushes herself too hard. Is extremely sensitive but does not show it, stubborn af and will never ever admit she is wrong.

Gemini : A friend. Very neat, and very picky. Nice, helpful and loves to gossip. Emotional and gets annoyed quite easily whenever someone teases her.

Cancer : Acquaintance. Very annoying, but is thoughtful and caring.

Leo : A friend. Shy and quiet at first but easy to talk to to. Loves to fangirl, remembers birthdays and kinda always high.

Virgo : A good friend. Very quiet at first but has a lot to say when you are closer to her. Will tell you secrets if she trusts you, and will stick up for you. Loyal and blunt but most of the time does it as its for your own good.

Libra : A good friend. Annoying yet endearing at the same time.Very emotional will cry at the littlest things. Acts tough on the outside, has plenty of male friends and crushes, loud and does not care for others feelings at time which can ruin relationships.

Scorpio : A Close Friend. Secretive and quiet, but once you get to know her she is extremely funny, nice and caring. She will also open up to you, and turn to you for support if she trusts you. She is smart and determined, and produces sarcasm at its finest, be it jokes or insults. Blunt, but will apologize if she feels that she has hurt your feelings accidentally. Awesome secret keeper.

Sagittarius : A friend. Very smart, nice and always happy. Great sense of humor, talkative if she knows you, and has a great memory. Real fun to be around and appreciates the littlest things you do.

Capricorn : Former best friend. Funny, loyal and playful. A little blur at times, smart and great sense of fashion. Will help you out at the darkest of times and is fun to be around.

Aquarius : Good friend. Crazy, wild and smart. Sings really well and cares more about herself at times than others. Great and very fun to be around.

Pisces : (Myself HAHAHA. Okay no i suck at describing me) A good friend. Loud at times and very attention seeking. Will not stand any kind of shit in any form, and will retaliate back with words that hurt worse than a beating. Great listener, crazy, wild and has a good sense of humor. Smart, feels things others do not normally feel, acts like she cares but she doesn’t really. Makes an exception if it is someone she really cares about.

anonymous asked:

I don't understand the "if it's on social media, you're not happenin'" quote by Chris. Sorry if I'm being stupid but could you possibly explain it :)

An anon to which I am more than happy to respond.

This was Chris and his sarcasm at its very finest. Total shade at M&D and their relationship. And also shade at his own public relationship. What he meant was if you are watching something that is happening on social media, chances are it is not real.  And i would go further to say, it if is excessively on social media (and we know who is), you really should be questioning the legitimacy of what you are being shown.  Because most people do crave some level of privacy. 

anonymous asked:

How long before your dumb ass realizes that the first half of reputation is sarcasm at its finest and she's mocking the media's portrayal of her. Meaning all those lyrics about her being a player and guys being toys to her, aren't fucking true and don't mean she's gay. I'm pans and can't fucking stand you people who have to ship real life individuals for your fetishistic otps. Because that's all it really is. You want gay couples so much the person's happiness irl doesn't mean shit to you.

How Long till you realize she’s lying to you? She’s a celebrity, not your best friend. The entertainment industry is like a small town. Everyone knows everything about everyone and people talk you know. This is not a fantasy, all this started because people know things you can’t even imagine. That’s how famous people earn money, by making Up stories and making you weak, ignorant people believe them. You’re also paythings for her to use. Learn more about PR, educate yourself on the topic and you’ll see who is wrong here.