santa clauses

In the movie The Santa Clause, one becomes Santa by putting on the red coat after the death of the previous Santa. Even ignoring how morbid this premise is on its own, it’s possible that there’s another even darker level to the story. When Scott Calvin shows up at the North Pole as the new Santa, not only do the elves not appear surprised, they seem happy to see him and not at all upset about the Santa he replaced. And furthermore, at the very beginning of the movie, we see an elf standing with a crowd of children outside a toy store near Scott’s house. Why would she already be there if she didn’t have some sort of prior knowledge of what was going to occur? This leaves me no choice but to conclude that the elves not only hated the previous Santa but actually orchestrated his demise.

tl;dr: In The Santa Clause, the elves totally murdered the previous Santa.

Dialogue Prompts

Originally posted by pray-for-the-sun

Dialogue Prompts

1.   “I’m sorry. It’s just everytime you open your mouth, you seem to get even more annoying. Does it take effort to do that?”

2.   “Where did you learn to fight like that?” “Have you ever been to a concert before?”

3.   “Remember that time when I asked for your option?” “No” “ Yeah neither do I”

4.   “Wereyou born this stupid, or were you just dropped on your head one to many times as a child?”

5.   “Please tell me he isn’t doing his victory dance behind me”

6.   “We’re Americans, we have a tendency of going overboard and starting a revolution”

7.   “Can’t we just hug this out?”

8.   “Do you love me?” “Depends on how much food you brought me”

9.   “If your laptop and I were trapped in a housefire and you only had enough time to save one, who would you save?……..Are you seriously having to think about this!?”

10.   “No one likes your jokes” “What are you talking about, the old lady at the store said I was funny!”

11.   “It’s a good plan!…..Okay it’s half of an okay plan…..So it’s actually like a hopeful idea”

12.   “Shouldn’t you be at work?” “Shouldn’t you be out telling little kids that Santa Clause isn’t real”

13.   “Why can’t the world just chill for one second”

14.   “Let’s say, hypthetically of course, that I needed help hiding a body-” “Hold up let me get a shovel”

15.   “Is he always this rude?” “Only when he watches Gossip Girls”

16.   “How can you look so attrative while crying?”

17.   “Wow we are screwed” “Really, what could possibly make you say that?”

18.   “Please don’t leave me. I love you”

19.   “I trusted you”

20.   “You’re just going to turn your back on everyone, again” “It was a defensive habit, I didn’t mean to.”

21.   “I almost died!” “Death by a hamster, I would pay to see that”

22.   “Newt Scamander, wouldn’t treat me like this!” “Well Newt is a fictional character” “How dare you!”

23.   “Did you even sleep last night?” “I’ll sleep when I’m dead”

24.   “Pretty sure none of this was suppose to happen”

25.   “Don’t you dare die on me….We’re suppose to grow old together”

26.   “You are my sunshine….my only sunshine…I never told you….How much I love you.”

27.   “I’m not strong or brave, but I will fight for you”

28.   “This can’t be real”

29.   “How did you two become friends?” “I punched him in the face and he gave me a highfive” 

30.   “This is not what I envisioned when you said: wanna play a game.”


                   I’ll be here waiting for requests

Originally posted by drunkbroadway

(please send your requests through the inbox)

The Ten Types of Supernatural Episode:  an Illustrated Guide.

1.  The Generic:

This is the kind of episode fandom veterans fondly refer to as “Old School Supernatural.”  Features a 70s rock soundtrack, a classic (yet in hindsight, relatively nonthreatening) ghost or monster, comically bad special effects, and body horror.  Probably from season one. 

Examples:  “Wendigo,” “Bloody Mary,” “Bugs.”    

2.  The Classic:

Not to be confused with the Generic, the Classic is the kind of episode that everybody remembers and everybody loves.  It’s infinitely quotable, carefully toes the line between hilarious and absurd, and is still frequently blogged about even if it came out 7+ years ago.  Almost definitely features Gabriel. 

Examples:  “Tall Tales,” “Mystery Spot,” “Changing Channels.”

3.  The Life Changer:

Once you see this episode, you will never be the same.  Whether it introduces a beloved character, kills them, or raises them from the dead, the Life Changer is the episode that either sends you into a downward spiral of unhealthy obsession, or merely accelerates it.

Examples:  “Lazarus Rising,” “Abandon All Hope,” “Lucifer Rising.”

4.  The Black Comedy:

Though much of Supernatural revolves around a unique cocktail of horror and humor, the Black Comedy is almost impossible to miss.  From famine-induced cannibalism, to a would-be antichrist, to a killer pagan Santa Clause, the humor of these episodes is darker than Batman’s worst nightmares and probably at least twice as depressing, yet manages to be oddly magical all the same.

Examples:  “Yellow Fever,” “My Bloody Valentine,” “A Very Supernatural Christmas.”

5.  The Crack Fic: 

These are the episodes whose only real purpose is to make you wonder if Supernatural is some kind of elaborate fever dream.  Neither advance the plot nor provide much further insight into its characters, but still entertaining in terms of pure absurdity. 

Examples:  “Man’s Best Friend with Benefits,” “It’s a Dog Dean Afternoon,” most of season seven.  

6.  The WELL-WRITTEN Crack Fic:

Despite having the same brand surreal absurdity of the Crack Fic, the WELL-WRITTEN Crack Fic not only serves to further character development, but will also tug at your heartstrings, make you laugh, and very likely make you cry. 

Examples:  “Monster Movie,” “Sam, Interrupted,” “Hunteri Heroici.”

7.  The Meta Fiction: 

Some shows break the fourth wall, but this one comes at it with a sledgehammer.  From directly addressing the fandom and its terminology to the show itself, the Meta Fiction episode is usually surprisingly enjoyable and well-done, if you can get past the sheer mindfuck of it.

Examples:  “Fanfiction,” “The French Mistake,” “Don’t Call me Shurley.” 

8.  The Tearjerker: 

This one specializes in one thing and one thing only, and that is emotionally destroying you.  May disguise itself as other kinds of episodes, like the Crack Fic and the Meta Fiction, before swiftly and efficiently moving in for the kill.

Examples:  “the Rapture,” “After School Special,” “the Man Who Would be King.”   

9.  The Tragedy Porn:

Do you enjoy watching your favorite characters suffer and die horribly for no particular reason?  No?  Well in that case, you picked the wrong show, my friend.  From the heart wrenching pain of Dean being forced to kick a newly-human Cas out of the bunker, to the soul-destroying injustices that were Kevin and Charlie, the Tragedy Porn is an episode that exists for no other reason than to make you want to crawl into a hole and die.

Examples:  “I’m No Angel,” “Dark Dynasty,” “Rock and a Hard Place.”

10.  The Grand Finale: 

The Tearjerker, made ten times worse with the addition of “Carry on my Wayward Son” and a cliffhanger ending.  Specializes in metaphorically ripping your heart out, making you sob like a pre-adolescent girl, and psyching you up for the next season, no matter how emotionally exhausted you may already be.

 Examples:  “No Rest For the Wicked,” “The Man Who Knew Too Much,” “Swan Song.”  

His Throne

(gif belongs to @heavnofhell)


His Throne

“Y/N! Just the little ray of sunshine that I wanted to see” Lucifer called out in a low, flirtatious tone as you entered the throne room, locking his eyes onto you as a smile spread across his face. He lounged comfortably with his elbow resting on one arm of the throne and his leg draped over the other, a position which only he make look both lackadaisical and threatening.

“Lucifer” you regarded, approaching him with a stack of papers in your hands.

Swinging his leg back over the arm of the chair, he rested both feet on the floor and drank in your figure, a thousand thoughts dancing quietly behind his eyes. A quick flick of his fingers sent the papers you were holding sailing to the other side of the room, scattering them to the ground with no regard for their importance.

“Come here” he propositioned, patting his leg as he beckoned you closer with a gesture of his head.

Your eyes drew wide for a moment as you pulled your lower lip between your teeth, trying to vain to suppress the smile that threatened to bloom across your face. Feet gliding towards him on their own accord, you approached the throne as he held out his hands, finding yourself within his grasp faster that you would have guessed.

He patted his thigh again, eyes half-lidded as he slid his fingers around your forearm and pulled you gently closer. You turned to sit yourself down on his leg, feeling like one of those children nervous over a mall Santa Clause. It wasn’t until he halted your turn, snatching your other arm to keep you facing him that you realized what he wanted.

Not one to disappoint, you brought your one knee up to rest beside his thigh, hoisting yourself up to straddle him on his throne. You dragged your lower half over his lap as you settled yourself atop him, sliding your fingers up his chest to lace them behind his neck.

“You have a meeting in twenty minutes, my lord” you purred at him, chest heaving from excitement as you felt his length beginning to stiffen under you.

His expression darkened, eyes flashing red as his fingers ghosted up your sides.

“Then I guess we better get started…”


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List of things I got sent to the principle’s office for (in vague order from kindergarten to high school):

  • stabbing a kid in the hand with a pencil 
  • bringing my mom’s pocket knife to show and tell
  • grabbing and twisting a kid’s neck skin until he cried
  • kicking my best friend in the face (he had to get stitches)
  • rolling down a hill that was out of bounds in the school yard (I got poison ivy from that)
  • teaching my entire class exactly where babies come from
  • hiding under my desk
  • telling the teacher it was my birthday and she thought I was lying (I was my birthday)
  • teaching the class Santa Clause isn’t real
  • chasing a girl around the class because I wanted to kiss her
  • passing “notes” rolled up in pencil grips
  • not gripping my pencil properly to write 
  • refusing to spell my whole last name (pihlajamaki is a long fucking name ok?)
  • telling my class my rabbits died
  • bringing a baby rabbit to class
  • full body tackling a kid who said i cheated on a test
  • kicking multiple kids in the shins 
  • punching a kid in the stomach after he dropped his lunch tray on my head
  • bringing a nursing book about anatomy to school to show my friends what a penis is
  • punching a kid in the face when he fake asked me out to a dance
  • forgetting to bring gym clothes
  • kicking a kickball into a fence and popping it
  • not doing my spelling homework
  • wearing a pentagram ring my father bought for me
  • drawing wiccan symbols on my jesus box
  • saying The Pope kicked the bucket during a viewing of the funeral
  • laughing during mass
  • refusing to do the signs of the cross
  • throwing up during mass
  • telling the class that I hate them so much I dont care if I go to hell because I’ll bring them with me
  • writing about someone’s ass in my daily journal
  • drawing particularly violent things in art class
  • refusing to do point perspective drawing for the 20th time in art class
  • drawing legs on literally everything for a month
  • drawing still lifes without a reference and boasting the teacher couldn’t tell (she couldn’t)
  • painting on the wall, someone didn’t get the mural memo I guess
  • writing ‘i love girls’ on the bathroom wall
  • convincing my friend to snort caffeine powder 
  • not bringing my copy of the hobbit to class and refusing to get a copy from the library 
  • breaking the front door of the school by kicking it open
  • ‘hacking’ into the computers to put games on them
  • telling everyone the password to the computer system was bigyakdaddy
  • going to school on ‘senor skip day’
  • dropping out of the school system entirely (they thought I did it on purpose somehow like how I changed the administrative preferences)
  • printing out 200 pages of gay erotic fanfic
How Clockwork Broke the News to Danny
  • Danny: Look! I'm not the new king!!
  • Clockwork: Did you or did you not read the scripture on the sarcophagus?
  • Danny: Yeeeaahh. I think I did.
  • Clockwork: Then you're the new king! In locking him in there and holding the crown, you accepted the contract.
  • Danny: What contract?
  • Clockwork: The hieroglyphics on the sarcophagus. You said you read them, right? So, when you shoved him on in there and took the crown, you became the heir.
  • Danny: The heir? But I'm not related to him! Am I?
  • Clockwork: No, no, no. You're not related to him. You're just the heir.
  • Danny: What?
  • Clockwork: Look, you've heard of King Arthur, right?
  • Danny: Yeah.
  • Clockwork: Okay. Just like him.
  • Danny: *still refusing to understand*
  • Clockwork: *teleports them go the castle, becoming irritated* Okay, look. *points to a line of hieroglyphics* "The New Heir: In putting me in here and holding my crown, the beholder waives any and all rights pertaining to previous identity(real or implied) and fully accepts the duties and responsibilities of the Ghost Zone's king in perpetuity until such time the heir becomes unable to do so by either accident or design."
  • Danny: What does that mean?!
  • Clockwork: It means you put him to sleep, you held the crown, you're the big guy!
  • Danny: That's ridiculous! I tossed away the crown!
  • Clockwork: *snaps* TRY TO UNDERSTAND THIS!!!
  • Sam and Tucker: OOOOOOOOOOO!!!
  • Clockwork: *takes a deep breath and takes Danny by the shoulders* Look. Let me explain something to you, okay? This place has to be put back in order. I'm not going to do it. It's not my job. I'm just the advisor. It's the king's job, but our king has been put to sleep. You shoved him in, you held the crown; that clearly falls under the agreement, so now you're the king, okay?!
the ultimate heathers lyric starter meme ( act 2 )

MY DEAD GAY SON

  • ❛  You wait just a minute, (name)!  ❜
  • ❛  It’s ignorant, hateful talk like yours that makes this world a place that they could not live in.  ❜
  • ❛  They were not dirty!  ❜
  • ❛  They were not wrong!  ❜
  • ❛  They were two lonely verses in the Lord’s great song.  ❜
  • ❛  Our boys were pansies, (name)!  ❜
  • ❛  Yes! My boys a homosexual, and that don’t scare me none.  ❜
  • ❛  I want the world to know, I love my dead, gay son.  ❜
  • ❛  I’ve been thinking. Praying. Reading some magazines.  ❜
  • ❛  It’s time we opened our eyes.  ❜
  • ❛  Well, the good Lord created the universe.  ❜
  • ❛  The Lord created man.  ❜
  • ❛  I believe it’s all a part of His gigantic plan.  ❜
  • ❛  I know God has a reason for each mountain and each flower, and why he chose to let our boys get busy in the shower!  ❜
  • ❛  I never cared for homos much until I reared me one.  ❜
  • ❛  He loves his son.  ❜
  • ❛  Jesus says it’s cool!  ❜
  • ❛  They just had flair!  ❜
  • ❛  They were desperate to be free!  ❜
  • ❛  They took a rebel stance, stripped to their underpants.  ❜
  • ❛  I can’t believe that you still refuse to get a clue after all that we’ve been through.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m talking you and me, in the summer of ‘83.  ❜
  • ❛  That was one hell of a fishing trip.  ❜
  • ❛  Our jobs are now continuing the work that they begun.  ❜
  • ❛  They were good men!  ❜
  • ❛  We’ll teach the world to love.  ❜

SEVENTEEN

  • ❛  Fine, we’re damaged. Really damaged, but that does not make us wise.  ❜
  • ❛  We’re not special. We’re not different.  ❜
  • ❛  We don’t choose who lives and dies.  ❜
  • ❛  Let’s be normal. Watch bad movies, sneak a beer and watch TV.  ❜
  • ❛  Don’t you want a life with me?  ❜
  • ❛  Can’t we be seventeen? That’s all I want to do.  ❜
  • ❛  If you could let me in, I could be good with you.  ❜
  • ❛  People hurt us, or they vanish, and you’re right, it really blows.  ❜
  • ❛  We let go, take a deep breath.  ❜
  • ❛  Don’t stop looking in my eyes.  ❜
  • ❛  Is that so hard to do?  ❜
  • ❛  Let us be seventeen, if we’ve still got the right.  ❜
  • ❛  So what’s it gonna be?  ❜
  • ❛  I want to be with you.  ❜
  • ❛  Yeah, we’re damaged. Badly damaged.  ❜
  • ❛  Your love’s too good to lose.  ❜
  • ❛  Hold me tighter. Even closer.  ❜
  • ❛  I’ll stay if I am what you choose.  ❜
  • ❛  You’re the one I choose.  ❜

SHINE A LIGHT

  • ❛  Deep inside of everyone there’s a hot ball of shame.  ❜
  • ❛  If we show the ugly parts that we hide away, they turn out to be beautiful by the light of day.  ❜
  • ❛  Every day’s a battlefield when pride’s on the line.  ❜
  • ❛  I attack your weakness and pray you don’t see mine.  ❜
  • ❛  If I share my ugly parts and you show me yours, our love can knock our walls down and unlock all our doors.  ❜
  • ❛  Who wants to share what’s in their heart?  ❜
  • ❛  No volunteers? Fine, I’ll start.  ❜
  • ❛  I live alone. My husband left. My kids are grown.  ❜
  • ❛  In the 60s love was free, that did not work out well for me.  ❜
  • ❛  The revolution came and went – tried to change the world, barely made a dent.  ❜
  • ❛  I’ve struggled with despair.  ❜
  • ❛  I’ve joined a cult.  ❜
  • ❛  I chant, I prayed but God’s not there.  ❜
  • ❛  (name) I’m ending our affair!  ❜
  • ❛  I faked it every time.  ❜

LIFEBOAT

  • ❛  I float in a boat in a raging black ocean, low in the water with no where to go.  ❜
  • ❛  The people smell desperate.  ❜
  • ❛  We’ll sink any minute so someone must go.  ❜
  • ❛  Everyone’s pushing! Everyone’s fighting!  ❜
  • ❛  There’s no where to hide.  ❜
  • ❛  The captain is pointing. well who made her captain?  ❜
  • ❛  Still, the weakest must go.  ❜

SHINE A LIGHT (REPRISE)

  • ❛  Aw look, (name) is gonna cry.  ❜
  • ❛  Stupid childproof caps!  ❜
  • ❛  Aw look, (name) is gonna whine all night.  ❜
  • ❛  You don’t deserve to live.  ❜
  • ❛  Why not kill yourself?  ❜
  • ❛  Here, have a sedative.  ❜
  • ❛  Whine, whine, whine like there’s no Santa Clause.  ❜
  • ❛  You’re pathetic because you whine!  ❜
  • ❛  You whine all night!  ❜
  • ❛  Your ass is off the team!  ❜
  • ❛  Go on and bitch and moan.  ❜
  • ❛  You don’t deserve the dream!  ❜
  • ❛  You’re gonna die alone.  ❜

KINDERGARTEN BOYFRIEND

  • ❛  He was sweet, he said that I was smart.  ❜
  • ❛  He was good at sports and people liked him.  ❜
  • ❛  At nap time, once, we shared a mat.  ❜
  • ❛  I didn’t sleep, I sat and watched him breathing.  ❜
  • ❛  I watched him dream for almost half an hour. Then he woke up.  ❜
  • ❛  He pulled a scab off one time playing kickball, kissed me quick and pressed it in my hand.  ❜
  • ❛  I took that scab and put it in a locket, all year long I wore it near my heart.  ❜
  • ❛  He didn’t care if I was thin or pretty.  ❜
  • ❛  He was mine until we hit first grade.  ❜
  • ❛  Last night I dreamed a horse with wings flew down into my home room.  ❜
  • ❛  Now we’re all grown up and we know better.  ❜
  • ❛  Now we recognize the way things are.  ❜
  • ❛  Certain boys are just for kindergarten.  ❜
  • ❛  Certain girls are meant to be alone.  ❜
  • ❛  I believe that any dream worth having, is a dream that should not have to end.  ❜
  • ❛  I’ll build a dream that I can live in, and this time I’m never waking up.  ❜

YO GIRL

  • ❛  Oh my god, is she dead?  ❜
  • ❛  Just another geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably.  ❜
  • ❛  keep it together.  ❜
  • ❛  I knew you would come far.  ❜
  • ❛  Smell how gangsta you are.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m so sorry.  ❜
  • ❛  Feel a bit punchy?  ❜
  • ❛  She’s not looking so well.  ❜
  • ❛  You’ve earned that red scrunchie.  ❜
  • ❛  Come join (name) in hell.  ❜
  • ❛  Where have you been?  ❜
  • ❛  We’ve been worried sick!  ❜
  • ❛  Your friend, (name), stopped by.  ❜
  • ❛  He told us everything.  ❜
  • ❛  He’s got your hand writing down cold.  ❜
  • ❛  Please, honey, talk to us.  ❜
  • ❛  No, you wouldn’t understand.  ❜
  • ❛  Guess who’s right down the block?  ❜
  • ❛  I’ve experienced everything you’re going through.  ❜
  • ❛  Guess who’s climbing the stairs?  ❜
  • ❛  Your problems seem like life and death, I promise they’re not.  ❜
  • ❛  Guess who’s picking your lock.  ❜
  • ❛  You don’t know what my world looks like!  ❜
  • ❛  Times up! Go say your prayers.  ❜
  • ❛  (name)’s running on fumes now.  ❜
  • ❛  (name)’s totally fried.  ❜
  • ❛  (name)’s gotta be tripping on shrooms now.  ❜
  • ❛  (name)’s done for, there’s no doubt now.  ❜
  • ❛  Notify next of kin.  ❜
  • ❛  Too late, he got in.  ❜
  • ❛  Sorry for coming in through the window, dreadful etiquette I know.  ❜
  • ❛  Get out of my house!  ❜

MEANT TO BE YOURS

  • ❛  All is forgiven baby!  ❜
  • ❛  Come on, get dressed! You’re my date to the pep rally tonight!  ❜
  • ❛  You chucked me out like I was trash.  ❜
  • ❛  For that, you should be dead.  ❜
  • ❛  Then it hit me like a flash: what if high school went away instead?  ❜
  • ❛  Those assholes are the key.  ❜
  • ❛  They’re keeping you away from me.  ❜
  • ❛  They made you bling, messed up your mind.  ❜
  • ❛  I can set you free!  ❜
  • ❛  You left me and I fell apart.  ❜
  • ❛  I punched the wall and cried.  ❜
  • ❛  I found you changed my heart and set loose all that truthful shit inside.  ❜
  • ❛  So, I built a bomb!  ❜
  • ❛  Tonight our school is Vietnam.  ❜
  • ❛  Let’s guarantee they never see their senior prom!  ❜
  • ❛  I was meant to be yours.  ❜
  • ❛  We were meant to be one.  ❜
  • ❛  Don’t give up on me now.  ❜
  • ❛  Finish what we’ve begun.  ❜
  • ❛  In the rubble of their tomb, we’ll plant this not explaining why they died.  ❜
  • ❛  Our burned bodies may finally get through to you.  ❜
  • ❛  Your society churns out slaves and blanks, no thanks.  ❜
  • ❛  We’ll watch the smoke pour out the doors.  ❜
  • ❛  Bring marshmallows, we’ll make s’mores.  ❜
  • ❛  We can smile and cuddle while the fire roars.  ❜
  • ❛  I can’t make it alone.  ❜
  • ❛  You were meant to be mine.  ❜
  • ❛  I am all that you need.  ❜
  • ❛  You carved open my heart, can’t just leave me to bleed.  ❜
  • ❛  Open the door please.  ❜
  • ❛  Can we not fight anymore?  ❜
  • ❛  (Name), sure, you’re scared, I’ve been there.  ❜
  • ❛  (Name), don’t make me come in there.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m gonna count to three. 1, 2, fuck it–  ❜
  • ❛  Oh my god.  ❜
  • ❛  Please don’t leave me alone.  ❜
  • ❛  You were all I could trust.  ❜
  • ❛  I can’t do this alone, still, I will if I must.  ❜

DEAD GIRL WALKING (REPRISE)

  • ❛  I wanted someone strong who could protect me.  ❜
  • ❛  I let his anger fester and infect me.  ❜
  • ❛  His solution is a lie.  ❜
  • ❛  No one here deserves to die, except for me and the monster I created.  ❜
  • ❛  Heads up (name).  ❜
  • ❛  I’m a dead girl walking.  ❜
  • ❛  Can’t hide from me.  ❜
  • ❛  There’s your final bell.  ❜
  • ❛  It’s one more dance and then farewell.  ❜
  • ❛  (name) told me you just committed suicide?  ❜
  • ❛  Yeah, well, he’s wrong about a lot of things.  ❜
  • ❛  I through together a lovely tribute, especially considering the short notice.  ❜
  • ❛  What’s under the gym?  ❜
  • ❛  That’s it.  ❜
  • ❛  What’s that sound?  ❜
  • ❛  Give a great big yell!  ❜
  • ❛  Step away from the bomb.  ❜
  • ❛  This little thing? I’d hardly call it a bomb.  ❜
  • ❛  This is just to trigger the packs of thermals upstairs –those are bombs.  ❜
  • ❛  I wish your mom had been a little stronger.  ❜
  • ❛  I wish she’d stayed around a little longer.  ❜
  • ❛  I wish your dad were good.  ❜
  • ❛  I wish grownups understood.  ❜
  • ❛  I wish we’d met before they convinced you life is war.  ❜
  • ❛  I wish you’d come with me.  ❜
  • ❛  I wish I had more TNT!  ❜

I AM DAMAGED

  • ❛  I am damaged. Far too damaged.  ❜
  • ❛  You’re not beyond repair.  ❜
  • ❛  Stick around here, make things better.  ❜
  • ❛  You beat me fair and square.  ❜
  • ❛  Please stand back now.  ❜
  • ❛  Don’t know what this thing will do.  ❜
  • ❛  Hope you miss me.  ❜
  • ❛  Wish you’d kiss me.  ❜
  • ❛  I’ll trade my life for yours.  ❜
  • ❛  Wait, hold on!  ❜
  • ❛  Once I disappear, clean up the mess down here.  ❜
  • ❛  Not this way!  ❜
  • ❛  Say hi to God.  ❜

SEVENTEEN (REPRISE)

  • ❛  Listen up kids, war is over.  ❜
  • ❛  Brand new sheriff’s come to town.  ❜
  • ❛  We are done with acting evil.  ❜
  • ❛  We will lay our weapons down.  ❜
  • ❛  We’re all damaged, we’re all frightened, we’re all freaks but that’s alright.  ❜
  • ❛  We’ll endure it. We’ll survive it.  ❜
  • ❛  (name) are you free tonight?  ❜
  • ❛  High school may not ever end.  ❜
  • ❛  Still, I miss you.  ❜
  • ❛  I’d be honored, if you’d let me be your friend.  ❜
  • ❛  We can be seventeen.  ❜
  • ❛  If nobody loves me now, someday somebody will.  ❜
  • ❛  There’s still time to make things.  ❜
  • ❛  One day we’ll change the world, but let’s kick back tonight.  ❜
  • ❛  Let’s go be seventeen, take off our clothes and dance.  ❜
  • ❛  This could be our final chance.  ❜
  • ❛  We’ll make it beautiful.  ❜
George Weasley x Reader: Gifts

AN: It tisn’t the season but who doesn’t love the holidays? ;) I just want to say thank you for all of your patience! There should be another fic this week as well!

Request: Anonymous

Warnings: N/A

Christmas Eve at the Weasley’s was a magical, truly magical, event. Arthur would chop down a large tree from the forest off of Ottery St. Catchpole, and Charlie and Bill would help him drag it inside. Percy and Mrs. Weasley took great care in stringing the lights and decking the branches with ornaments and glittery tinsel. Bill would pull Ginny on his shoulders and she would place the star on top, while Ron brought out the gifts to place underneath the tree. The twins enchanted a toy train to huff and puff on the rug before the fireplace, and everyone was in high spirits as snow drifted in sheets in the yard.

Y/N had experienced this merriment once before, but it seemed to be just as special the next year. Afterall, she had started dating George on Christmas Eve and she looked forward to their private celebration on the rooftop at midnight. While sometimes she felt out of place, the Weasley’s always made her feel welcome and right at home. The bunch gathered around the supper table - all of the redheads, Hermione, Harry and Y/N included. Mrs. Weasley prepared a very succulent roast ham, as well as whipped potatoes, roasted chestnuts, and a lovely pecan pie. The room was filled with noise, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t filled with cheer.

“It looks delicious, Mrs. Weasley, really.” Y/N said, placing her napkin in her lap.

“Oh, thank you dear.” She replied, sitting down herself. “I do hope I made enough for everyone.”

Arthur Weasley was already three bites into his slice of ham. Always very intrigued with Y/N, for she came from a half muggle family, he started conversation right away.

“What is it that you called the game with the ball on the ground? And the kicking?” He asked, spitting bits of food about. Mrs. Weasley looked disgruntled.

“Football, Mr. Weasley. The Americans call it soccer. They have a world cup every few years, just like Quidditch.” Y/N replied.

“Yeah, dad. Y/N and her family got seats right next to the muggle Prime Minister!” Ron said, excitedly.

Y/N flushed a deep red.

“I-It was an h-honor.” She stammered. “I am grateful for that opportunity.”

Arthur smiled pleasantly, and went back to his food. Catching a knowing glance from Harry, Y/N’s eyes focused on her food. Y/N’s family was very wealthy, in contrast to the Weasley’s. While she knew that neither party had any qualms about the other, she didn’t like to flaunt her wealth. She thought that it was tacky.

“Next month you’re going to see the Weird Sisters in concert aren’t you, Y/N?” Bill asked, excitedly. “Fred said that you’d got backstage passes!”

Y/N almost choked on her potatoes, but swallowed quickly and dabbed at her lip with her napkin. All pairs of eyes at the table were on her.

“Y-Yes.” She said, quietly. “I feel very fortunate.”

Dinner progressed, and Y/N found herself saying very little. She hadn’t found a balance between being ashamed about her wealth and being too haughty. It seemed as though the differences between the families were shockingly obvious. Students at school who were particularly nasty would taunt George about it, and while he put on a brave face, Y/N knew he felt a little embarrassed. Her clothes were always brand new, in comparison to the Weasley’s hand-me-downs. Her potions equipment was bronzed, and her cauldron was top quality. Many of the Weasley children had to share equipment, and Ron’s cauldron was being held together by spell-o-tape.

After their meal was finished, Fred and Harry helped Mr. Weasley clean up the table, and Mrs. Weasley served the pie. Once everyone was full, they all sat by the fire and watched the train whistle. Gradually everyone slipped off to bed, except for George and Y/N.

“I’m almost ready to head out to the roof, I just have to put some finishing touches on your gift.” George said.

He hadn’t said much at dinner, refusing to make eye contact with Y/N after Ron and Bill’s display. He ate his food quietly, and seemed rather jumpy when Fred tried to coax a conversation out of him. Y/N worried she had said something to upset him, and that she had ruined their one-year anniversary. As he scampered up the stairwell, Y/N pulled out her gift to him.

It was wrapped very neatly, in red and white paper. Little holiday sayings littered the wrappings and they were enchanted to glow brightly in the dim lighting. The ribbon was curled expertly, and she had carefully scrawled his name on the tag in her best print: “Georgie <3”. She put it behind her back, and carefully climbed the staircase, ducking out the window to the roof.

George was having a minor nervous breakdown in him and Fred’s room. While Fred was in his underpants, flopped over on the bed and snoring peacefully, George rushed about the room, ruffling paper and craft supplies. He tried his best to dress up the gift, but no matter how hard he tried, it looked pathetic. The package was made of three different wrapping papers, spell-o-tape binding everything together. Multiple different Santa Clauses waved merrily at him, some in sleighs, some carrying sacks, and all bumping into each other from the wrapping job. George winced, hoping that the darkness of the night would work in his favor.

He crawled out onto the pitch of the house, and stopped dead in his tracks. Y/N was sitting, her legs dangling off of the side, and George was completely speechless. The stars looked like they sparkled in her y/h/c hair perfectly, but their shine was lackluster compared to her y/e/c eyes. They glimmered in the night like expensive jewels. When she turned to look at him, she smiled and his heart stopped completely. Y/N was the most fantastic girl in the world and his stomach trembled at what she would think of his gift.

“Georgie, open yours first!” Y/N said, excitedly shoving her package into his lap as soon as he sat down.

He chuckled, trying to relax his nerves, and ran a hand through his wild auburn hair. He held the package between his hands and Y/N snuggled into his arm. His brown eyes danced into half-moons with adoration at his lovely girlfriend. George opened the package very carefully, lifting up the tape in a way that did not rip the parchment. Y/N watched his every move with excitement.

When he finally got the wrapping off, he put the ribbon and paper to the side, saving it because he thought it was beautiful. There was a lump of shockingly green fabric. Curious, he tugged it upwards and the cloth unfurled. It was a jersey from the Irish National Quidditch Team, and for the second time that night he was speechless.

“Y/N… love…” He croaked, once he was able to get a word out.

“Look at the back Georgie!” She squealed with excitement.

He turned it around, and noticed a dark and messy scrawl on a bit of the back. His name was there, written along with a short note and a sloppy signature. George felt as if electricity was surging through his veins. He was so excited and at the same time so reluctant to give his gift to Y/N. She watched him very cautiously with bated breath, afraid that she had shamed him with her extravagant gift.

“It’s… Barry Ryan…” George murmured.

Y/N became limp. Was it the Keeper that he liked or was it one of the Chasers?

“Th-That’s your favorite right? Ryan’s the one you like?” She questioned, wanting to make sure.

“Yeah… he signed it… for me?” George said, exasperated.

“Do you like it?” Y/N asked.

“It’s… so perfect.” George said.

His cheeks were dusted with pink as he brought his gift from behind his back to show her. Y/N did indeed notice the wrapping, but she thought it couldn’t have been more perfect. It showed that George really tried to make it look presentable for her, and that he’d worked so very hard on it. She took it from him carefully, and exercised the same amount of caution that he did while opening it. Y/N placed every scrap of paper in a neat pile by her side, saving them.

Because she thought it was beautiful.

As she tore away piece by piece she slowly uncovered the present that was waiting for her. On the top was fabric as well. She unraveled it to find a beautiful white scarf, made out of very soft material. Below it was a small, leather bound book. The front was painted with wildflowers, and as she thumbed through it, she saw that most of the pages were blank and lined. The first few pages had been written in.

George had written her a love note and pasted in a photograph of the pair. In it, Y/N was sitting on George’s lap, smiling and chattering with their friends. His arms were wrapped around her, and he planted a kiss on her cheek, looking at her as if she was the most entrancing thing in the entire world.

Y/N was confused. Flourish and Blotts didn’t sell journals like this. Their journals were spiral bound, and made of much denser paper.

“Georgie…” Y/N said, softly.

George was ready to rip his hair from his head. She had gone to all of this trouble to get this signed for him and what had he gotten her? A bloody notebook and scarf.

“I know, it’s not much.” George said, pulling her into his lap. “And I’m really, really sorry. I took some odd jobs to try and save for something really nice, but…”

Y/N put her hand over his mouth.

“George, where did you get this notebook?” She asked.

He shifted uncomfortably.

“I, erm.” He seemed to not want to tell her.

She waited patiently, staring down at the cover in her hands.

“I made it.” He said. “I know you love to write. And-and I like to hear your poems and stories. So I bought the leather myself, and I… I… I painted the cover, and bound it as best as I could so nothing would fall out, and I know sometimes you’re timid about starting new things so I put a little note in there to encourage you.”

Y/N was still silent.

“And I know you’ve been eyeing that scarf in the window of Madame Malkin’s for weeks now, and I really hoped that you hadn’t gone in to buy it yet so I asked Madame Malkin to save it for me when I had the money to buy it.”

Y/N was filled to the brim with emotions, and tears started to drip from her eyes. George craned his neck to see what her expression was, and felt like his heart was stomped flat when he saw her crying.

“Oh, Y/N! Shh, shh love, I’m so SO sorry.” He said, hushing her and squeezing her tight. “I’m- I’m,”

“George this is the greatest gift I have ever gotten.” She said, quietly.

He stopped stuttering and held a look of confusion.

“Come again?” He said, blankly.

“No one has ever put this much thought into a gift for me before. George, I can’t believe you bought my favorite scarf, and the- the journal, it’s so wonderful. I love you so much, darling.” Y/N explained, tears of joy dropping wildly from her eyes.

George was so relieved he almost passed out – or passed away. He pulled Y/N back and kissed her firmly on the lips. She laughed, wiping the tears from her eyes, and the two watched the moon sail over the stars as they held each other close.

I did a movie poster-ish thing!

At first I thought that Darkiplier and Wilford would be great partners in crime - and I still stand by this idea. But if we think about it, Googleplier would fit there as well!

It makes sense. Wilford as their leader because of his unique abilities (being able to kill people on live TV without getting captured, killing Santa Clause, somehow come out of death and being not killed while facing Teddy) and sometimes with pretty good ideas. Darkiplier as the one who manipulates people to do what they want and then Google who does the same thing but with electronics instead of people. And besides, he can help Dark with calming down Wilford while having way too crazy ideas.

And I extremely liked the part when Wilford pointed his gun at camera.