sank to grief

Supernatural 12x23

I honestly hate to rant but my bb Cas deserves this And yes Misha is a regular next season but couldn’t that just be Dean imagining him, or hallucinating again… Now, I understand that I am not a writer for the show, and none of us are. But seriously? Cas? Of all characters?! Rowena, I understand she was a favorite for some people, and Crowley had an honorable death (that still broke me a lil’ bit) but Casti fricking el? Cas has been a main character, no, an important character, for the past eight seasons. Supernatural won’t be he same without them. I’m not going to venture into the past few character deaths that were unjust, (Eileen, Rowena,etc.) but imma stick to my buddy Cas. Honestly, I don’t know how they could just kill off Cas like he was not important! They didn’t even give him a line! There is no reason, none at all, that they should’ve killed him off. I’m honestly trying so hard to think of one good reason…ONE. I also understand that a lot of you think Chuck or the devil spawn is going to bring him back, and I know they’ve killed all of hem off multiple times before but you have to remember that it is the twelfth season going on thirteen. If the thirteenth isn’t the final season then there can’t be an awful lot more can there? Cas is dead. For good. But what he left. WHO he left. Is in frickin ruins. Castiel is an angel of the stinking lord, he could’ve been if some importance in the next season. And he didn’t even get a final line! The last thing he heard was Dean screaming his name and he didn’t even get a final line. Cas deserved a whole lot better than this shiz. Now let’s talk about Dean. The man that made Castiel fall from heaven. The one that was broken when Cas was still in purgatory and he wasn’t. The man that went through heaven and hell to save Cas. The man that gave Cas a mixtape The man that got nervous when Cas didn’t answer his phone for a few days The man that loved Cas, platonically or not, no one can deny the more than profound bond that they share. (No I am not making this about Destiel,) Dean was broken when Cas was in purgatory, but he knew that Cas was more than likely still alive, and Dean was broken at the fact that Cas wanted him to leave purgatory without him that he would rather think he left Cas than the alternative which was hat Cas didn’’t want to go home with Dean. Now, knowing Dean was empty and miserable when Cas was in Purgatory. We can’t even imagine what horrors await Dean in the next season. He watched Cas die right in front of him. Dean crumpled to his knees at the sight of Cas dead and his wings burnt around the two of them. The next season can go in a few directions with Cas’s death One: they can bring Cas back and all will be merry again. (Highly unlikely) Two: Dean can be extremely depressed about Cas to the point where he is hallucinating again. So broken this time that I don’t think there would ever be a happy ending for Dean. (Likely) Three: Dean doesn’t get depressed. Now, if this is the direction the writers are planning to go in…I will honestly quit watching. They have already ruined every single characters plot line, and if they do this then they are digging their own graves. I’m not saying I want Dean to be broken and depressed, believe me when I say I would want Cas back no matter what, but honestly, it would be so out of character for Dean not to care that I would slam myself into a brick wall. Dean cares too much about everything, but doesn’t show it. If Dean hallucinates Cas after purgatory I bet my ass that he will hallucinate after he dies right in front of him! (Unlikely) Four: Dean can sell his soul again. He talked to Mary about doing so earlier in the episode. So maybe this is what the writer have planned? Honestly this wouldn’t be in character-like of Dean. So I wouldn’t be surprised, but I would be so heart broken if it did because we all know Sammy’ll try and stop it and then when it does happen, Cas’ll be so mad at Dean. Ugh. (Highly unlikely) Five: Dean can be so hellbent on revenge that he rips apart worlds just to avenge Cas. Honestly,, this’d be entertaining. Now believe me, I don’t like my Dean-o to be hurt. So any of these directions hurts like hell. But. This would be likely of Dean. This is one of his characteristics, so I don’t doubt that the writers may use this (likely) Castiel deserved better, Misha deserves better, We deserve better than this. Supernatural will not be the same with out Castiel. Neither will team free will. Nature’s first green is gold, Her hardest hue to hold. Her early leaf’s a flower; But only so an hour. Then leaf subsides to leaf. So Eden sank to grief, So dawn goes down to day. Nothing gold can stay. -Robert Frost We love you, we will miss you, goodbye Cas Wait you know what?! Cas isn’t right. Goodbye, Castiel Winchester

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our mistakes they were bound to be made

requested by @stroke-my-glabella-please

philkas au based off ‘ill keep you safe’ by sleeping at last

Some days it’s hard. Some days Philip can’t get out of bed, some days Lukas looks over his shoulder every minute. Some days they cling to each other like they’re drowning. Some days the hardest thing to do, the only thing they accomplish, is waking up.

Today is the 2 month anniversary of Philip’s mother’s death; the two month anniversary of the day Ryan Kane died.

Lukas picks Philip up on his bike, both dressed in black, and the two head for the graveyard. It’s empty today, on this random Tuesday in December; that thought is weird for Philip. That day was the worst of his life.

Interesting how one person’s worst day is another’s best.

Philip kneels down in front of the tombstone, still new looking, and sets the small bouquet in front of it. He lets his gaze settle on his mothers name.

Anne Shea. Mother. So dawn goes down to day.

“What’s it from?” Lukas asks, kneeling down beside Philip.

“A poem she liked.”

Keep reading

Preference: Their Yearbook Quotes.

a/n: this is of course assuming that they all stay in school. c: also some of these aren’t so good but some of these boys really had me stuck. It was hard enough picking my own yearbook quote last year ;P

Darry knew he was lucky because a lot of his friends didn’t have two parents or parents that treated them right. He knew that without his parents he wouldn’t have been able to get through high school and do all he did so he kept it simple for his yearbook quote.

“I love you mom and dad. Thank you for taking good care of me.”

Sodapop used a a quote from something Ponyboy wrote when he was little. In the third grade Ponyboy had to write an essay about someone that inspired him and he wrote about Sodapop. That always meant a lot to Sodapop so he used one of his favorite lines from that essay.

“There are a lot of things that inspire me about my brother Sodapop. He’s always kind and happy and he loves everybody. But what I love most about him is how hard he works for the things he wants. I know school is hard for him but he tries his best anyways and even though he doesn’t think it will happen, I can’t wait to see him graduate.”
-Ponyboy Curtis

Ponyboy’s quote is an obvious pick but he only had one thing in mind when it came time to pick his quote.

“Nature’s first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf’s a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.”
-Robert Frost

Two-Bit wanted to leave one more piece of his joker legacy at the school so his original pick was “Goodbye teachers, goodbye class, high school you can kiss my ass.” but that was quickly shut down. He was annoyed and so he told Ponyboy to pick something for him. Ponyboy took a while to find what he thought was the perfect quote and Two-Bit loved it.

“Laughter is timeless. Imagination has no age and dreams are forever.” -Walt Disney**

Dally refuses to pick one. He really doesn’t care but since everybody has to have one with their picture the policy is that they pick one from Winnie the Pooh books***. He was absolutely pissed when he found this out but it was to late to submit one. He threatened to kick the crap out of the entire yearbook committee (earning him detention for a week). When he saw the quote he told everyone he hated it but he didn’t mind so much what it said, he just hate that the guys were teasing him about where it came from.

“We didn’t know we were making memories, we just knew we were having fun.”

Steve chose a song lyric for his. It was one of his favorites and it for him well.

“Gotta do some livin’, got the wanderlust. Better clear the highway ‘cause I’m gonna move some dust. Oh I got wheels, wheels on my heels. And I gotta keep rollin’, rolling along.”

-Elvis Presley

Johnny always loved music. He was always intrigued in how it could reach so many people and how lyrics could mean different things to different people so he picked some lyrics that meant something to him.

“Leave your stepping stones behind, something calls for you. Forget the dead you’ve left, they will not follow you. The vagabond who’s rapping at your door. Is standing in the clothes that you once wore. Strike another match, go start a new. And it’s all over now, Baby Blue.”

-Bob Dylan

**I read that this wasn’t actually a Walt Disney quote but it worked so we’re going with it. :P

***My high school’s policy that anyone that didn’t submit a quote had their’s picked from Winnie the Pooh so this is a real thing.


“Nature’s first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.

Her early leaf’s a flower;
But only so an hour.

Then leaf subsides to leaf.

So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.

Nothing gold can stay.”

-Robert Frost

Everything Ponyboy Curtis says in the book.


“I’m okay. Quit shaking me, Darry,  I’m okay.”

“I’m okay.”

“I did?”

“I am?”


“I know. I’m just a little spooked, that’s all.”

“You’re crazy, Soda, out of your mind.”

“Didya catch ‘em?”

“I’m okay.”


“I was comin’ home from the movies. I didn’t think…”

“Me and Johnny’ll come. Okay, Darry?”

“A little.”



“How come you dropped out?”

“You’re not dumb.”


“Tuff enough. Wait till I get out, though, so you can keep Darry off my back.”


“Ponyboy Curtis.”

“My dad was an original person. I’ve got a brother named Sodapop, and it says so on his birth certificate.”

“I know. You’re a cheerleader. We go to the same school.”

“I’m not. I got put up a year in grade school.”

“I’m a grease, same as Dally. He’s my buddy.”


“Yeah. Dad made him quit after he tore a ligament, though. We still hang around rodeos a lot. I’ve seen you two barrel race. You’re good.”

“He’s a dropout.”

“Okay. Might as well.”


“Sure. We’re young and innocent.”

“He’d leave you alone if he knew you.”

“Glory, Two-Bit scare us to death!”

“He went hunting some action—booze or dames or a fight. I hope he don’t get jailed again. He just got out.”

“Not that I know of. I think he’s got a piece of pipe, but he busted his blade this morning.”

“Sure. Y’all want some?”

“He ain’t dangerous like Dallas if that’s what you mean. He’s okay.”

“It was the Socs.”


“I believe you. We’d better get back out there with the popcorn or Two-Bit’ll think I ran off with his money.”

“That’s why we’re separated. It’s not money, it’s feeling—you don’t feel anything and we feel too violently.”

“He got sold. They came and got him one day and took him off. He was a real valuable horse. Pure quarter.”

“Yeah. Why?”

“He’s…He’s not like Sodapop at all and he sure ain’t like me. He’s hard as a rock and about as human. He’s got eyes exactly like frozen ice. He thinks I’m a pain in the neck. He likes Soda—everybody likes Soda—but he can’s stand me. I bet he wishes he could stick me in a home somewhere, and he’d do it, too, if Soda’d let him.”

“Well, I don’t. An’ you can shut your trap, Johnny Cade, ‘cause we all know you ain’t wanted at home, either. And you can’t blame them.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It ain’t fair! It ain’t fair that we have all the rough breaks!”

“I couldn’t use this. I couldn’t ever cut anyone…”

“I know.”

“It’s okay. We aren’t in the same class. Just don’t forget that some of us watch the sunset too.”

“What was that?”

“Not right now.”

‘Maybe I would have. Where you headed?”

“I reckon.”

“Big-time Socs, all right.”

“Don’t. You can’t kill yourself, Johnny.”

“Out of the big towns. In the country…”

“Glory, what time is it?”

“Okay. If you get cold or something come on over to our house.”

“I…I went to sleep in the lot…”

“I didn’t mean to. I was talking to Johnny and we both dropped of…”

“I said I didn’t mean to…”

“You don’t yell at him!”

“Johnny? Come on, Johnny, we’re running away.”

“Gotta cigarette?”

“Johnny, I’m scared.”

“I don’t very often. It was Darry. He hit me. I don’t know what happened, but I couldn’t take him hollering at me and hitting me too. I don know…sometimes we get along okay, then all of a sudden he blows up on me or else is naggin’ at me all the time. He didn’t use to be like that…we used to get along okay…before Mom and Dad died. Now he just can’t stand me.”

“Shoot. You got the whole gang. Dally didn’t slug you tonight ‘cause you’re the pet. I mean, golly, Johnny, you’ve got the whole gang.”

“Let’s walk to the park and back. Then maybe I’ll be cooled off enough to go home.”

“You ain’t a’woofin’.”

“What do they want? This is our territory. What are Socs doing this far east?”

“Oh, glory. This is all I need to top off a perfect night. Want to run for it?”

“You know what a Soc is? White trash with Mustangs and madras.”

“Johnny, I think I’m gonna be sick.”

“You really killed him, huh, Johnny?”

“Like—like they did before?”

“Johnny! What are we gonna do? They put you in the electric chair for killing people! I’m scared, Johnny. What are we gonna do?”

“Okay. I’m okay now.”

“Where can we find him?”

“Tell him it’s Pony and Johnny. He’ll come.”


“Then don’t tell him.”

“I’m sorry. Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“Now how do we find Jay Mountain?”

“I don’t look like a farmboy.”

“I guess I look okay now, huh, Johnny?”

“They ain’t green, they’re gray. And I look about as much like Soda as you do. He’s good-looking.”

“Could you tell me where Jay Mountain is?”

“Yessir. We’re playing army and I’m supposed to report to headquarters there.”


“Hey, Johnny. Fancy meetin’ you here.”

“Who’s acting? What’d you get?”

“Wheee! A paperback copy of Gone with the Wind! How’d you know I always wanted one?”

“Gee, thanks. Peroxide? A deck of cards…Johnny, you ain’t thinking of…”

“Oh, no! No, Johnny, not my hair!”

“I don’t see why. Dally could just as easily mug somebody with short hair.”

“Okay. Get it over with.”

“Not too short. Johnny, please…”

“It’s lighter than I thought it was. Can I see what I look like now?”

“Johnny, you can’t wash your hair in that freezing water in this weather. You’ll get a cold.”

“I guess so.”

“Shoot nothing. It took me a long time to get that hair just the way I wanted it. And besides, this just isn’t us. It’s like being in a Halloween costume we can’t get out of.”

“I’m still tired.”

“Oh, it ain’t that. I mean, not all of it. I’m just a little spooky. I really don’t know what’s the matter. I’m just mixed up.”

“Remember how he was wisecrackin’ last night? Last night…just last night we were walkin’ Cherry and Marcia over to Two-Bit’s. Just last night we were layin’ in the lot, lookin’ up at the stars and dreaming…”

“Whatta we gonna do?’

“No! I’m fourteen! I’ve been fourteen for a month! And I’m in it as much as you are. I’ll stop crying in a minute…I can’t help it.”

“Johnny? You awake?”

“We ain’t gonna cry no more, are we?”

“That’s what I thought.”

“Dally? Shoot, he ain’t got any more manners than I do. And you saw how he treated those girls the other night. Soda’s more like them Southern boys.”



“Nothing gold can stay.”

“Nature’s first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf’s a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.”

“Robert Frost wrote it. He meant more to it than I’m gettin’, though. I always remembered it because I never quite got what it meant by it.”

“And what happens to be so funny about it?”

“I know. Well, you ain’t like any of the gang. I mean, I couldn’t tell Two-Bit or Steve or even Darry about the sunrise and clouds and stuff. I couldn’t even remember that poem around them. I mean, they just don’t dig. Just you and Sodapop. And maybe Cherry Valance.”

“Shoot. Maybe they are.”

“Hey, Dally!”

“How’s Sodapop? Are the fuzz after us? Is Darry all right? Do the boys know where we are? What…”

“Is it safe to go out?”

“Look who’s talking.”

“A letter? From who?”

“Sodapop? But how did he know…?”

“How come you got hauled in?”

“I know. I look lousy, but don’t rub it in.”

“Dally! You kill people with heaters!”

“Cherry? The Soc?”

“Dad used to take us all huntin’. I’ve been in the country before. How’d you know about the church?”

“Yeah. Darry always got the most ducks, though. Him and Dad. Soda and I goofed around too much, scared most of our game anyway.”

“I guess so.”

“Let’s go see what the deal is.”

“What’s going on?”

“I bet we started it. We must have dropped a lighted cigarette or something.”

“I’ll get them, don’t worry!”

“Is that guy coming?”

“Too scared?”

“In the back, I guess.


“Where’s Johnny? And Dallas?”

“I didn’t either. Dallas hit me. How come?”

“It was? Golly, I didn’t feel it. It don’t hurt.”

“Are you taking us to the police station?”

“Are Johnny and Dally all right?”

“Johnny has black hair. Dally’s the mean-looking one.”

“No, we’re greasers.”

“Greasers. You know, like hoods, JD’S. Johnny is wanted for murder, and Dallas has a record with the fuzz a mile long.”

“I am not. Take me to town and you’ll find out pretty quick.”

“Yeah. Even on my birth certificate. And don’t bug me about it. Are…are the little kids okay?”

“How come? How come?”

“I am?”


“Darry, I’m sorry…”

“Take a bath.”


“In here! Don’t slam the door.”

“Now look what you did. There went our breakfast. Can’t you two wait till I set the eggs down before you go shovin’ me all over the country?”

“Aw, lay off.”

“How do I like what?”

“You mean…that they’re thinking about putting me and Soda in a boys’ home or something?”


“No, they ain’t goin’ to put us in a boys’ home.”

“Darry, did you know about the juvenile court?”

“I had one of those dreams last night. The one I can’t ever remember.”


“You going to take Sandy to the party? What’s the deal?”

“How come?”


“I’ve stayed by my lonesome before. You can’t afford a day off.”


“Yeah. You carry more than one bundle of roofing at a time today and me and Soda’ll skin you. Understood?”


“A judo expert?”

“We’re gonna clean up the house. The reporters or police or somebody might come by, and anyway, it’s time for those guys from the state to come by and check up on us.”

“I have. And if you had the sense of a billy goat you’d try to help around your place instead of bumming around.”

“I don’t know. I felt like playing hero.”

“You might not have. You might have done the same thing.”

“’Greaser’ didn’t have anything to do with it. My buddy over there wouldn’t have done it. Maybe you would have done the same thing, maybe a friend of yours wouldn’t have. It’s the individual.”


“Running away won’t help.”

“I’d help you if I could.”

“No. You hate the whole world.”

“My name’s Ponyboy. Nice talkin’ to you, Randy.”

“He ain’t a Soc. He’s just a guy. He just wanted to talk.”


“He wants a copy of Gone with the Wind so I can read it to him. You want to run down to the drugstore and get one?”

“Dally’s gonna be okay. And Darry, and me, we’re okay now.”

“Johnny! Are you okay?”

“You’ll be okay. You gotta be. We couldn’t get along without you.”

“You’ll be okay.”

“You ain’t gonna die. And don’t get juiced up, because the doc won’t let us see you no more if you do.”

“That’s what Johnny said. What’d he want?”

“Me? Why?”

“I’ll bet.”

“I’m all right. Don’t tell Darry, okay? Come on, Two-Bit, be a buddy. I’ll be well by tonight. I’ll take a bunch of aspirins.”

“I’m okay. And if you keep your mouth shut, Darry won’t know a thing.”

“Yeah, but they raised two boys before me. Darry hasn’t.”

“I know.”

“Tonight—I don’t like it one bit.”

“I ain’t chicken, Two-Bit Mathews, and you know it. Ain’t I a Curtis, same as Soda and Darry?”

“I mean, I got an awful feeling something’s gonna happen.”

“Yeah. I know.”

“Not so good. Will you go up to see him?”

“Why not?”

“That’s okay. I wouldn’t want you to see him. You’re a traitor to your own kind and not loyal to us. Do you think your spying for us makes up for the fact that you’re sitting there in a Corvette while my brother drops out of school to get a job? Don’t you ever try to give us handouts and then feel high and might about it.”

“Hey, can you see the sunset real good from the West Side?”

“You can see it from the East Side, too.”

“Soda, when did you start shaving?”

“When did Darry?”

“You’re funny. We ought to send you in to the Reader’s Digest. I hear they pay a lot for funny things.”

“You like fights, don’t you, Soda?”

“How come?”

“How come you like fights, Darry?”

“How come? I’ve always come through before, ain’t I?”

“I’ll be okay. I’ll get hold of a little one, okay?”

“What happened to Tim Shepard?”

“Let me fight, Darry. If it was blades or chains or something it’d be different. Nobody ever gets really hurt in a skin rumble.”

“I’ll be okay. How come you never worry about Sodapop as much? I don’t see you lecturin’ him.”

“And what do you do for fun?”

“Hey, Two-Bit, how come you like to fight?”


“I ought to, he’s my brother.”

“Yep. But why him?”

“I thought you were in the hospital.”


“Huh? Yeah, I guess so”

“I have been. A rumble. I’m okay.”

“I am?”

“Gosh, mister, I’m sorry.”

“Thanks a lot.”

“Johnny…he’s dead. We told him about beatin’ the Socs and…I don’t know, he just died.”

“Dallas is gone. He ran out like the devil was after him. He’s gonna blow up. He couldn’t take it.”

“I’m okay. I don’t want to sit down.”

“Soda…is somebody sick?”

“Am I sick?”

“Is Darry sorry I’m sick?”

“Hey, Darry. Hey, Darry, wake up.”

“What was the matter with me?”

“Where’d I get a concussion? How long have I been asleep?”

“No. Darry, I’m not ever going to be able to make up the school I’ve missed. And I’ve still got to go to court and talk to the police about Bob’s getting killed. And now…with Dally…Darry, do you think they’ll split us up? Put me in a home or something?”

“I don’t remember.”


“Where’s Soda?”

“I’m okay. Just a little hungry.”

“Man, I’d like that just fine.”

“Oh, no. Track meet. I guess this just about puts me out of every race. I won’t be back in condition for the meets. And the coach was counting on me.”

“Soda. What all did I say while I was delirious?”

“I don’t like it. I never liked it.”

“I don’t like it. Soda, did I ask for Darry while I was sick?”

“Oh. I thought maybe I didn’t ask for Darry. It was bugging me.”

“You look beat. I bet you ain’t had three hours sleep since Saturday night.”


“Yeah, I know him.”

“Yeah. Sure, why not?”

“Hi, Randy. Have a seat if you can find one.”

“I’m okay. You can’t really miss my name on any kind of bulletin.”

“Wanna smoke?”

“Yeah. I know. Hey, holler if you see one of my brothers coming. I’ll catch it for smoking in bed.”

“My parents are dead. I live here with just Darry and Soda, my brothers. That’s what’s worrying me. If the judge decides Darry isn’t a good guardian or something, I’m liable to get stuck in a home somewhere. That’s the rotten part of this deal. Darry is a good guardian; he makes me study and knows where I am and who I’m with all the time. I mean, we don’t get along so great sometimes, but he keeps me out of trouble, or did. My father didn’t yell at me as much as he does.”

“I had it. I had the knife. I killed Bob.”

“I killed him. I had a switchblade and I was scared they were going to beat me up.”

“Johnny is not dead. Johnny is not dead.”

“Okay, okay. I ain’t going to sleep smoking, Darry. If you make me stay in bed there ain’t anywhere else I can smoke.”

“Well, golly, I can’t pick it up and Soda doesn’t, so I guess that leaves you.”

“All right, all right. That don’t leave you. Maybe Soda’ll straighten it up a little.”

“Sure. I’ll be more careful.”

“Yessir, I’ll try. What’s the theme supposed to be on?”

“I mean it. I’ve had about all I can take from you guys.”

“I guess so.”

“Picking up the glass.”

“How was work?”

“Something wrong?”

“What’s the sweat about my schoolwork? I’ll have to get a job as soon as I get out of school anyway. Look at Soda. He’s doing okay, and he dropped out You can just lay off!”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? You’d like me just to get out. Well, it’s not that easy, is it, Soda?”

“You don’t have to draw me a picture.”

“Maybe he tried.”

“Where did you think you were going?”

“I’m not crying.”


“Race you.”

“Mr. Syme, this is Ponyboy. That theme—how long can it be?”

“Can it be longer?”


Nature’s first green is gold, 
Her hardest hue to hold. 
Her early leaf’s a flower; 
But only so an hour. 
Then leaf subsides to leaf. 
So Eden sank to grief, 
So dawn goes down to day. 
Nothing gold can stay.  
Natures first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to told.
Her early leafs a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.
—  Robert Frost