conversation I had at work today

me: hi, what can I get you?

middle aged white man: are you gonna smile for me today? 

me: excuse me?

middle aged white man: I was here cracking jokes yesterday and you didn’t laugh. must have been angry about something

me, internally: I will murder your whole family

me, externally after a long pause: sorry, I don’t recall that. now what can I get you?

middle aged white man: I’ll take the same thing I had yesterday. 

me, after an even longer pause: refresh my memory

middle aged white man: the crispy chicken sandwich

me, internally: oh? the same sandwich I’ve served to about 500 people today alone? the one that everyone fucking orders? the one that makes you even less unique than you already are for ordering it?? that one??

me, externally and super sarcastic: how could I forget?

so I go and place the order and I hang out in the kitchen for a bit until it’s done bc I don’t want to stand out with Mr Originality and when it’s done I bring it out and give it to him

middle aged white man: thanks, now don’t forget to smile, alright?

me, staring at him with with exaggerated bitch face: have a nice day