sandswimmer

anonymous asked:

How do you cook your Yellow-finned sand-swimmer? I have about 2kgs I just bought from the fish grocer and I was hoping you had a recipe I could use.

First, anon, a word of warning: the yellow-finned sandswimmer can be extremely toxic if prepared improperly.

Although it’s possible to cook your sandswimmer in any number of ways, it’s vitally important that the fish first be buried in sand for three days.

It must be buried on a full moon night, but only one moon can be full. You should bury it at exactly midnight. It can be wrapped in either cloth or plant material, but do not, under any circumstances, use plastic. You must bury it with the tail facing east. Cover it completely with sand, and leave no marker over the place where you’ve buried it.

Leave the fish for three nights, then dig it up at noon on the fourth day. You can now cook it however you please. Most traditional recipes recommend grilling over a charcoal fire. It’s good luck to give the first bite to an outlander.

*

{Three Skywalkers, a Solo, three droids, and Chewbacca are sitting around a holoscreen. Anakin looks insufferably smug, and Luke doesn’t look much better. Leia is trying without success to pretend she isn’t amused. Han is shaking his head in admiration.

“You know, kid,” he says to Luke, “you’d be pretty good in a con. I don’t think even I could have said all that with a straight face.”}

twird96  asked:

What sides go best with the yellow-finned sandswimmer? Has Anakin/Luke/Han ever sold anybody information on the best places to catch them?

Well obviously the best place to catch a yellow-finned sandswimmer is in the Dune Sea.

(“That’s why they call it the Dune Sea, you know,” Luke says, nodding sagely to the reporters eating out of his hand. “Because when the rainy season comes, the floodwaters rise and all the sandswimmers come out of hibernation.”)

There are several acceptable options for sides, but by far the best, Anakin says, is Tatooine’s native rice.

(Rice, of course, requires an enormous amount of water and does not in fact grow on Tatooine.)