sandra-dee

“Well, I tell you. She was so sweet. I don’t know any other word for it. She was so surprised I’d called, and pleased, and she didn’t mind if I knew it. She’d never been to a premiere before, it turned out. I spent half the afternoon wondering what’s the matter with these Hollywood fellows, that a kid like that didn’t have a date to a premiere.” - Sal Mineo on taking Sandra Dee to the premiere of The Big Country (c. 1959)

How to Break Zen - Extended

So in a recent post, I said that all one needs to do to fry the mind of our favorite albino actor is dress up in Sandy’s greaser getup from “Grease” and reenact “You’re the One That I Want.” Can you imagine how it would play out if you did that to him?

(Warning: Naughty/could be mildly NSFW but nothing too serious.)

- He’d gone for a ride on his motorcycle again. Perfect timing to spring that surprise on him.
- Nicknames like “cutie” or “princess” are nice, but you want something spicier.
- You guys had watched “Grease” a few nights ago, and he’s been humming the songs ever since. It’s like his past and his present came together in a musical.
- “I can think of one lady who’d look so much better in that leather getup, jagi.” *wink*
- You were SO caught off-guard by that open flirtation coming from your princely beau. He saw your flustered blush, chuckled, snuggled closer, and turned back to the movie.
- And now? Payback time. Oh, two can play this game.
- You change into some sexy leather clothes a la Sandra Dee with some colorful heels, then you sprawl like a model on his couch.
- The door clicks.
- “Honey, I’m ho–”
- GOODBYE ZEN
- NICE KNOWING YOU
- Those beautiful eyes have never bugged out like that before.
- A tiny voice is going, “We match!” (He hasn’t taken off his black riding clothes yet.)
- But then he realizes your top bares your shoulders, dips veeerrry low, and just CLINGS to your upper body.
- He is WHEEEEEEEEEEEEZING
- YOU LOOK EVEN BETTER THAN HE DARED TO IMAGINE
- “B-b-babe?” he chokes.
- AND THOSE PANTS
- THOSE BLESSED LEATHER PANTS
- CLINGING TO YOUR–
- Poor honey can’t form coherent words.
- He’s trying to calm himself.
- Gentleman. Gentleman. Gentle–
- You stand up and saunter over and he’s never been so dizzy in his life.
- He actually grabs a countertop to keep from falling…or tries.
- His hand landed on a magazine with him on the cover.
- Welp crap now he’s on the floor.
- And you’re standing over him CRAP
- You settle one heeled foot on his shoulder like Sandy did to Danny.
- Is his heart even beating?
- You smirk down at him and sing, “If you feel a weird affection / you’re too shy to convey / meditate in my direction…”
- You run your hands down your hips and this boy actually gasps.
- “Feel your way.”
- RIP ZEN
- Poor boy actually yelps and throws himself backward just like Danny. SO DRAMATIC.
- But once he recovers, he gets up.
- Too late for any warnings about the beast.
- He’s ON you.
- And he’s not letting you up for many, many hours.
- Best believe he came up with a few spicier nicknames after that. ;)

HEADCANON THAT THE T-BIRDS MOVE TO TULSA AFTER EVERYONE GRADUATES AND SANDY’S LIKE “yo,, we can’t go there,,,,” AND EVERYONE JUST “why???? we don’t know anyone there??” AND SANDYS SO RELUCTANT BUT,,, WHEN THEY GET THERE,, THEY RUN INTO THE GANG AND SODA JUST STOPS IN HIS TRACKS AND

CONSPIRACY THEORY SANDY IS THE SANDY SODA DATED AND DANNY IS SO CONFUSED AND this probably wasn’t very good but it’s 12:39 am and I got excited