List of my favourite little hockey things

  • The tiny jump refs do when the puck comes near them
  • The camera in the goal that is supposed to capture nice shots when people score but is perfectly positioned to show off goalies’ butts. In my house it’s called the “butt cam”
  • When players in the background fall over for seemingly no reason
  • That thing when players are lying on their stomach like penguins but are still trying to be helpful
  • Martin Jones
  • The corners of the rink when players skate past that they’re reflected on all the panels and it just looks cool?
  • Just, the whole checking thing. They all look so graceful skating around on the ice and then they just… crash into one another… I love it it’s hilarious
  • Canada
  • Face offs. This concept is amazing. The ref is basically throwing the puck in and saying “good luck”
  • That little “well, fuck” moment when a hockey stick breaks
  • That snow that comes up when players stop suddenly
  • When goalies end up in weird positions like

“paint me like one of your French goalies”

I love hockey, guys

Hockey Phrase Definitions

  • Assist = I gotchu boo, have a goal
  • Blew a tire = ice much slippery
  • Boarding = wall for safe, not for face.
  • Breakaway = quick like a bunny
  • Chirping = much insult
  • Crashing the net = up close and personal, goalie edition
  • Delay of game = dumb
  • Dropping the gloves = gloves off, better for hugs
  • Empty net goal = participation award
  • Flow = to the fella over there with the hella good hair
  • Goaltender = marshmellow optimus prime
  • Holding = now is not the time for hug
  • Icing = belongs on cakes, not in sports
  • Jock strap = under the butt nut hut
  • Line brawl = much hugs
  • One timer = couldn’t do that again if I tried
  • Own goal = woo goal for the other team
  • Penalty box = pout place
  • Referee = not Denis Widemans friend 🐸🍵
  • Spearing = hockey players are not hot dogs
NHL regular season 2016-17

Arizona Coyotes & Buffalo Sabres

Boston Bruins

Chicago Blackhawks

Colorado Avalanche

Columbus Blue Jackets

Dallas Stars

Edmonton Oilers

Florida Panthers

Montreal Canadiens

Philadelphia Flyers

Pittsburgh Penguins

San Jose Sharks

Toronto Maple Leafs

Vancouver Canucks

Washington Capitals

Winnipeg Jets

When you have your main teams you support but you also love specific players in the other teams and because you love them you kinda love their team too, so you're stuck loving all the teams like the hoe that you are

playoff hockey? did you mean:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!??!!!!!!!?!!!!!!!!!??????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?!

The benches in hockey dressing rooms are built so that your feet rest on the floor with your skates on which means that there are pictures of Large Professional Athletes with sock feet dangling off of the bench and I think that is a beautiful thing.

Goalie Warm Up Mini Compilation

You had a rough day? No problem my dear fella I got a little compilation for you that might make you smile ;)

“Goalie Warm Up Mini Compilation”


Reto Berra going down in a, what it seems to be a blocking butterfly then ‘shaking’ (correct me if I’m wrong)..

Originally posted by nylander

Alex Stalock also going down in butterfly and ‘shaking’  his pads..

“The Wild’s Darcy Kuemper taking a breather.

https://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/20/sports/hockey/nhl-goalies-need-their-alone-time-er-stretching-routines.html?_r=0

McDonald nugget (Fleury) spreading his chicken wings..

Gotta be flexible to make acrobatic saves..


Originally posted by hockeynat96

‘Shaving’ the ice.. Ice might be slick and you don’t wanna slide out of postion, good warm up for your legs and the puck slows down easier.

I don’t know what this fucker is doing.. (’Scuse my french)

Carey Price teaching the kids..


Jonathan Quick streching his legs..