Hey guys!! How ya doin over in America?? So, you remember the French and Indian War, right?? Haha yeah that was a thing that happened. It also left us pretty broke sooo... we were thinking, to get some money, we're gonna introduce a new tax on you guys!! Just this once. So. What do you think
Some asshole over in Boston:
I do not like it, Sam I am,
Samuel Adams is remembered as a fiery revolutionary and staunch patriot while his second cousin John is remembered as a sophisticated political operator. Likewise, at the dawn of the American Revolution, while John’s wife Abigail debated the finer points of political philosophy and chided her husband to “remember the ladies,” Samuel’s wife Elizabeth roughly fashioned a feather pen with scissors in order to relay her plans to escape British forces in Boston. John and Abigail may be the exemplary couple of the American Revolution, but the correspondence between Samuel and Elizabeth reveals that this other Mr. and Mrs. Adams matched John and Abigail in their devotion both to each other and also to the patriotic cause. Read more.
I know what most of you think of me, that I’m a thug, a smuggler, rebel. That I started all of this, asked for it, a drunk who never did anything with his life and has caused all this trouble for everybody. Well, I’m here today to tell you… That you’re right. I am. I am all of those things, and more.
Col John Laurens with our Friend Mr Pain arrived here a few Days ago from France. He left the Town the Day after his Arrival. His Visit to me was so short that I could not converse with him so fully as I wishd. I hope he will be able to inform you of his complete Success in his Negociation.
From Samuel Adams to Thomas McKean, 29 August 1781
Huh. So Laurens (only quickly) met Sam Adams after arriving back in
Boston from France.
We all know the first thing you think of while studying US History is who would win in a fight. Finally, the definitive answer you’ve been waiting for:
Alexander Hamilton: I know what you’re thinking: he’s a prissy rich boy who can’t take a hit. But he’s been shunned by the other founders since day 1. He probably still thinks the clause that the president must be native born was targeting him. Dude’s got a massive chip on his shoulder and more bottled anger than you can handle. Don’t fight Hamilton.
James Madison: Madison is a complete runt. He’s 5'3", squeaks when he talks, and would probably fall down if you blew on him. Fight James Madison.
Benjamin Franklin: He’s old and fat and probably not in the best physical shape; you could probably take him out. But afterwards he’ll take your ass to town with a bunch of witty burns that society will quote for centuries afterwards. Don’t fight Benjamin Franklin.
Thomas Jefferson: He’s still gloating because he got a ton of credit for plagiarizing John Locke’s ideas- not to mention that he’s a complete hypocrite, advocating for liberty while owning (and even having affairs with) slaves. Dude needs to be taken out. Fight Jefferson.
Samuel Adams: Dude was born with fire spitting out of his ears. He’ll pummel you into the ground, steal your girl, and then blow up your house. Don’t fight Samuel Adams.
‘No taxation without representation’ was the cry of the Sons of Liberty and many furious American colonists by the dawn of the early 1770’s.
The Boston Tea Party was only a spark, one that, in part, ignited the flame of revolution within the men and women of America. On the 16th of December, 1773, Samuel Adams and the Sons of Liberty boarded three British ships, many disguised as Native Americans. They proceeded to dump 342 chests of tea unceremoniously into the harbour in protest of the ‘Tea Act’, imposed by the British earlier that year.
The total damages, nearly $18,000, enraged the British Parliament to the point of implementing military rule in Boston, thus sparking further outrage.