* . ✦ ° HEY bitches of PSL. Now that I’ve finished that nasty business of exposing your secrets, let’s get to the fun part. Maybe you didn’t go to last night’s bonfire or maybe you got too drunk to remember. Maybe you were there and you weren’t too drunk, but you just didn’t give a fuck about getting involved with other people. Any of these things are possible. So, just like that super annoying intro on glee (and the not so annoying intro on Jane the Virgin), I’m here to tell you everything you missed.
have you all met AUGUST WOLFF yet? because RENEE BLANCHARD sure has. the young man, rumored to be the twin brother of SLOANE WOLFF recently moved back to PORT ST. LUCIE from somewhere in NEW YORK after five years of not visiting our sunshine state at all. you all know that our lovely RENEE is a washed-up REALITY TV STAR you might remember from watching on THE VALLEYS or from reading her BLOG (girl, as a fellow blogger, it makes me sad to see where you’ve ended up). ANYWAY, getting all that information aside, the two seemed to enjoy a nice conversation about SMORES before AUGUST made a move on her and KISSED her. be careful, RENEE, the boys who are good with words and normally otherwise, very veryBAD.
we’ve been keeping you updated about the subtle romance between NOAH SHAKIR and ASTRID MENDEL, and it looks like things are starting to HEAT UP, though a certain ELI TUPUA might be trying to dismantle it. ASTRID and ELI had a conversation before ASTRID met up with NOAH, and ELI seemed to confront NOAH afterwards about his intentions with ASTRID (for those of you who don’t know, ELI and ASTRID are very close friends). HOWEVER, what we really want to share with you guys is the scoop of NOAH and ASTRID being spotted WAY OUT IN THE OCEAN, clinging to one another and SMOOCHING. i see y’all, okay? smh.
speaking of SMOOCHING, it looks like EVERYBODY is getting some liplock action in PORT ST LUCIE this weekend! as you all have been informed (by YOURS TRULY, nonetheless) GREYSON MARKS and LUNA RIZZO are not strangers to each other, even though both of them being from OUT OF STATE would suggest this. however, they are BOTH from SAN FRANCISCO, and have been revealed to be EX LOVERS, or … maybe not? last night my sources say they overheard GREYSON telling LUNA that he is STILL PINING FOR HER, and then the pair shared a KISS. i have to wonder though, you guys did break up for a REASON last time. who’s to say it will WORK OUT this time?
SLOANE WOLFF and SAWYER PATEL may have had a ROCKY START when SLOANE broke into SAWYER’S apartment while she was DRUNK, thinking it was her own since she lives NEXT DOOR, but they seemed pretty FRIENDLY on the BEACH, where they TALKED and LAUGHED and also got REALLY HIGH together. they ended up LEAVING together, though that might just be because they are NEIGHBORS and that just MAKES SENSE.
taking a break from this NASTY cuteness, let’s talk about the real SHOW-STEALER from last night: it seems like LACEY MOORE is just the queen of DIFFICULT BREAKUPS, and if the one with CYNDELL D’AMBROSIO didn’t prove that to you, last night she got dumped again.. by her best friend, well… ex best friend.. JUDE WILDER. JUDE, who spent most of the evening looking typically MOPEY, apparently lashed out at LACEY, saying that they WERE NOT FRIENDS AND NEVER WERE, according to my sources. almost IMMEDIATELY after, LACEY was seen running into DARCY WHITTAKER, and the pair seemed to have a quick discussion that may have surprised DARCY. then, lacey sought out comfort in the arms of HER GIRLFRIEND CYNDELL. JUDE meanwhile? He finally reconnected with SAMUEL SANCHEZ…
and last, but not least, SAMUEL SANCHEZ and DARCY WHITTAKER unsurprisingly were seen arriving at the bonfire TOGETHER, and (equally unsurprisingly) they left it together as well. however, what DOES surprise me (and probably you guys too) is that they SPENT TIME TOGETHER during the event, CHATTING AND MAKING OUT next to the water. my sources say that SAM was quite intoxicated, but DARCY was apparently completely sober (and, after my conversation with you all about her wine habits, i can’t imagine why she would be?) - but STILL, i wonder what they were TALKING about? whatever it was, it seemed like SAM told JUDE about it, and apparently DARCY has been trying to text LUNA RIZZO, but according to my sources, after her evening with GREYSON and my post about her SECRET… she’s NOWHERE to be found. INTERESTING.
in case you MISSED IT, here are the notorious faces of the residents who DID NOT go through with their tasks and have been exposed. you can read more about that on the home page, but most of these kiddos actually attended the event and do have some interesting stories to tell.
MILA SHIELDS was seen talking to RENEE BLANCHARD and ROZA SAHMETI, ROZA daring her to binge drink, and MILA seen offering RENEE vodka.
PIERCE FITZGERALD had a rough evening, getting DRUNK almost immediately after seeing DARCY WHITTAKER with SAM SANCHEZ. he ended up confronting the latter, who SHOVED him a few times and later DECKED him in the jaw. his body guard, SEBASTIAN ROMERO was nowhere to be found, but ROZA SAHMETI found him sobering up near the water and proceeded to care for him.
WINONA LAUDER seemed to be too high and mighty for our beach bash, which is a real shame. the task that i was going to have her do would have really caused some drama.
LUNA RIZZO was seen kissing her (ex) lover, but now apparently NO ONE can get a hold of her.
CYNDELL D’AMBROSIO was seen taking pictures with and being affectionate to her girlfriend, LACEY MOORE, and later comforting her after her friend break up with JUDE WILDER. ROZA SAHMETI additionally spilled her drink on her. I’m starting to like this ROZA girl, i may need to do a post about her later, and see what secrets i can share with you guys..