samuel hendrickson

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Why I’d Hate To Be Asian by Samuel Hendrickson

1. All Asians look alike.

2. Asian women aren’t attractive.

3. Sweatshops suck.

4. Pot smoking gives them double chink eye.

5. Math is hard.

6. The only way to get into show business is if you know kung-fu or play an asian mobster.

7.Asian people are small.

8. He hates sushi.

9. Asian males have a small package.

10. They blur out their porn.

My initial reaction: FUCK YOU ASSHOLE AND GET BACK TO YOUR FARM. But I realized, damn, I’m perpetuating a cycle of hate. So I decided, ok, I better just get my thoughts out before they manifest into something worse. Here is my response to Sam’s (can I call you Sam? Samuel just sounds ridiculous) list.

1. Nah, we may share similar characteristics like black hair and brown eyes, but there’s a lot of us that don’t really look too much alike. You know, Indian people look a little different than Taiwanese people. Phillipino people look a little different than Japanese people. Should I go on?

2. Alright, cool man. More for me.

3. Yeah, they do suck, but they’re also the ones that made your Notre Dame t shirt. And as the video mentioned, probably the majority of the stuff you have in your dorm room.

4. That is the least of your worries if you’re asian. Have you SEEN how bright we glow when we drink booze?!

5. True, it is. But try finding a 21st century job that doesn’t require a little math. Go on, I’ll wait.

6. Harry Shum Jr.

7. Yao Ming is 7'1. Jeremy Lin is 6'3. I’m 6'1. Jet Li is 5'6. We vary in sizes!

8. ….then don’t eat sushi? But I understand if raw fish makes you uneasy (don’t worry bro, I know other asians who don’t like it. crazy, I know, right?).

9. They got these asian stereotypes, what’s with that? My dick’s big, I drive good, and I suck at math.

10. Yeah, I have no defense for that. It really does suck.

So there you have it Sam. Come out to LA and let me show you around. I’m positive I can change your tune.


By now I’m sure most of you have seen the incredibly offense and racist video posted by Samuel Hendrickson from Indiana about why he’d hate to be Asian. I checked Twitter to see the response this video is getting. And, as to be expected, thousands of people are sharing their feelings with Sam, in an awfully colorful way. I would almost feel bad for him, but this was his last tweet (last night): “Only I could manage to get an entire race to hate me in just one night. Dear Lord. Lol…" What a dumbass.

But what’s worse… there are actually many people (all white, of course) that are defending him. And not just sending a tweet or two to him…. but checking and responding to many people letting them know that this video is not racist and everyone is overreacting– such as Twitter user @BFawn2. I’ve never tweeted at someone with anger before, but I was actually very close to letting this girl know via social media what a moron she is. (Oh ps- she also uses the n-word in a few tweets the day before the Asian video posted… in case there were ay doubts about her being a disgrace to humanity.) I’m glad we live in a century where this type of video is not tolerated, but sad that there are still so many people who are so ignorant.