The Monday After the Project for Awesome
“Why do you look so tired? What did you do this weekend?”
“I frantically tried to upload my YouTube charity video to a website, but there were so many of us that it kept crashing. Fortunately, there were confetti explosions on the livestream to distract me as the volunteers fixed the website. I also listened to an author read from his book, which is made of the same four pages repeated over and over and over and over again.
After I uploaded my video, I watched a guy eat some crickets. Did you know that you can get containers of crickets that look like bottles of seasoning?
Some Mythical Beast joined the livestream and talked to a scientist sitting in warehouse about how many times their parents and grandparents had been divorced. One grandmother was married to 5 different guys and never divorced any of them. Don’t worry, it was legal…they all died.
The next guest came on and gave away her famous green hoodie for $1,000. She was wearing it on her first episode of her cooking show where she made grilled cheese. Well, I guess she didn’t really make grilled cheese, because there wasn’t cheese in the house. She just drank a bunch of wine and made toast in a pan.
There was a Taylor Swift dance party when we raised $200,000 for charity. At $250,000 a New York Times bestselling author who has had two of his books made into movies, woke up his wife, the artist, so she could put peanut butter on his and he could put jelly on her face. Then they put banana slices on their eyes and kissed. At various other funding goal levels, challenges were completed. There was juggling while doing splits, acoustic song covers by the scientist, flipping ears inside out, weird cat mouth noises, and the ultimate reward we all stayed up for was balancing a napkin on a hand (totally worth it).
Between these challenges, at 36 after every hour, we did something called KittyTime. Where everyone got a cat, or a shirt with a cat on it, or drew a cat and tweeted a picture of it. We had #kittytime trending. We are impressive. Oh yeah, and they put rubber gloves on their heads and blew them up so they looked like rosters.
And when it got too late in America, some lovely British people took over the livestream. Where we got to play with cats and look at baby pictures. Throughout the whole event we were watching videos promoting charities and talking to people from around the world in the comment sections, but the British hosts were really good and showcasing a lot of videos.
In the morning, the author came back wearing a soccer jersey for a team sponsored by a YouTube channel. He wore a fox on his head and covered his face in sharpies. Then they waxed the intern’s legs so it said P4A. A porcupine stole the show, because it looked like an alien and seemingly yelled “mine” when you gave it bits of bananas. Oh, and someone cuddled a skunk.
The author poorly washed Fireball Wilson “Willy” Roberts, AKA Bubbles the Nerdfighting Puppy, after he rolled in poop. The dog still smelled of poo after the bath, according to Henry. Someone told us if we paid $5 we could read about how he dated his cousin. A man put on his fiancee’s makeup, a women held a pile of poo, and talked to the scientist about how they should laminate each other’s baby photos and put them in the shower.
When we raised a million dollars, the artist put makeup on the author. The scientist was wrapped up in toilet paper like a mummy, and some lady in New York dressed like a Christmas tree. The author’s lips look like he drank blood. The scientist looked like the marshmallow man went on a diet. The lady in New York was very convincing as a Christmas tree.
During the second evening shift, Fartmas was born in between KittyTimes. They were examining a variety of objects on the livestream, and when they looked at Australian currency, the phrase “But Farts” appeared in the field of view. The super hero ButFartMan was born soon after when the scientist wore his shirt as pants. Then came the birth of Fartmas along with a slew of fart parody Christmas songs. Then they talked about all the books and movies that struck fear into their souls.
The Bristish came back on, and refocused our efforts on watching videos. All and all I watched over 200 videos about charities, because while the silliness is amazing the videos are beautiful. People from all over the world and of all ages post videos promoting their favorite charities. I got to see all the wonderful things Nerdfighters dedicate their time and effort to throughout the year. So many people in a constant effort to decrease world suck. Sometimes people cannot donate money or their time or cannot fix the issues in their lives. They can’t cure their family member of a disease. They can’t travel to countries and install wells. But they can make a video that promotes their cause. They take the time to write scripts, film, edit, sometimes draw or do stop motion or interview people. Hundreds of people told their stories about some of most important issues in their lives, and I had the joy of spending two days listening to them.
How was your weekend?”