Ok, but which two characters from TBS would have the stupidest conversations? The 'fmk: renaissance scientists edition' conversations, or the 'hey look i found a mario vore fanfic' conversations or that kind of thing?
I can’t believe I just had to read the phrase “mario vore fanfic” with my own two eyes. And I can’t believe that I’m sort of tempted to go to Ao3 to see if such a thing exists (I’m sure it does).
I think all the characters are capable of these conversations given the right combo. Some that immediately pop to mind are Sam/Adam, Chloe/Mark, Joan/Mark (maybe not in their current state but certainly in the past), Caleb/Alice (I know you guys haven’t met her yet but this is, like, 80% of their conversations), Sam/Agent Green, and Rose/Caleb.
I'm embarrassed to ask but since I'm anon I'll do it. You are so intelligent and I know you're trying to make a point with the Orwell, Animal Farm quotes but they are going over my head and I can't fit in what you are trying to say. The "pig to man" etc. Please nobody laugh at me because this is a humble, honest question. If you feel like it maybe late,r would you mind writing something easy so we could understand your thoughts? I also don't understand shy Sam is acting this way. Thank you.
I followed the Italian breadcrumbs from Diana’s retweets and what do you know they lead right to this:
“Never listen when they tell you that Man and the animals have a common interest, that the prosperity of the one is the prosperity of the others. It is all lies. Man serves the interest of no creature except himself.” ― George Orwell, Animal Farm
Maybe later I’ll write something, but for now I will sit back and see where this shitshow ends up. If nothing else, it is entertaining.
I can't stand you. You and other Richonners think you're the shit. You can't go bullying people for having a different opinion. Michonne won't be around for ever and I'm going to laugh in your face when she's dead.
You know what? I was going to laugh this one off and ignore it like the others, but screw you.
You Anons are what is known as a SAM: a SmartAss Masochist. You say or do stuff that’s annoying so it elicits a response from your betters that is punitive. You want your feelings hurt; you like the pain. Do you like getting dragged on the internet? Does this float your boat?
You want me to talk down to you, SAM? You want me to tell you how bad you are, SAM? Is that why you’re in my inbox? You want me to hurt you? Is that what you want?
A few things, SAM, and then I’m done and you can go ahead and block me:
1. Opinions are opinions are opinions. If someone tags theirs with anti comments, someone will reply to it offering THEIR opinions. It’s not ‘rocket appliances’; why is this so hard to grasp?
2. You can get well and truly fucked for wishing death on Michonne. I see that you types on Anon never mention Rick or wanting him dead when you spew this anti-Richonne drivel. Keep Michonne’s name out of your mouth!
3. Why are you even here? Why, if you hate Richonne so much, are you in the inbox of a Richonner or looking at the tag?
4. I can’t fuckin’ stand you either, you insufferable fucking dickwank.
The whole cast is laughing at you. They're actors. They do a job and Sam and Cait are lucky enough to be really good friends too. Why is it so hard to grasp that people can be really good friends and really physically comfortable with each other but not be having sex? They just think you're all idiots.
Welp thanks. Obviously we know that though.
I’m cool with being called and idiot though… maybe they are having sex. Maybe they aren’t. Not my business. But I still am entitled to my opinions on the matter.
So have a nice day and stop calling random people on the internet idiots. It’s not very nice.
Maybe these two are laughing at you… you never know…
hc that you're super dedicated to your work so when sam goes to bed and you're still in your office, sometimes you'll hear his lil shuffle footsteps at the door and he'll say in a really gruff, deep sleepy voice "you coming to bed?" and when you hum in response and start to push yourself away from your desk, he'll come up behind you and wrap his arms around your waist, lift you and carry you to bed all while you're squealing and laughing as he presses messy kisses to your neck
You’ve been working all day in your office, trying to complete a project for Monday. You hear Sam come up the stairs from watching TV.
“Babe, go to bed. It’s already midnight and you’ve been working on that all day. There’s always tomorrow.”
“I know Sam, but I’m almost done. I’ll only be a few more minutes.” Sam walks over to you to place a goodnight kiss on your lips.
“And done!” The project took longer than expected to finish so when you look over at the clock, you see that it’s already two in the morning. You just need to go over it once more to make sure it was correct, but are interrupted when you hear Sam dragging his feet down the hallway.
You hear the floor creek when he reaches the door frame and you look over at him, only to see that he was squinting due to the light from your office. When he spoke you could tell that he was still half asleep. His voice was low and gruff, “you coming to bed?”
“Mmmmmm,” you reply as you push your chair away from the desk in order to stand up. You reach over and turn off the desk lamp, leaving just the light from your computer illuminating the room.
Sam comes up behind you and wraps his large arms around your waist. He places a kiss against your temple and his breath is hot against your ear. “I missed you.”
“I was just down the hallway.”
“I know, but I didn’t get to fall asleep with you in my arms. I need to make up for lost time.” Sam turns you around to lift you up and proceeds to throw you over his shoulder.
“Sammy!” you squeal. “Let me go,” you laugh as you hit his back, trying to get him to put you back on your feet.
“I’m not leaving you until I’m done kissing every inch of you.” He reaches the bed and throws you down onto it, quickly covering your body with his. He starts placing wet, messy kisses against your neck causing you to laugh.
“You’re so goofy. You know that, right?”
“I do but you love it”
You giggle in response and nod your head. “Yes I do. Now I believe your mouth has other things it needs to be doing.”
*Notices her expression* Hey, why the long face?
*Sighs* Some guys on the street called me fat today.
What? Did you know them? *Seriously starts to consider hunting them down to beat them up*
No, they were just a couple of strangers. And I'm just thinking of how nice it would be to not have the truth thrown in my face all the time like that.
... You think you're fat?
Well... I know I'm a bit hefty but there's not much I can do to change that. I've tried but nothing really works. But I just wish, sometimes, that I could love how I look and that I wouldn't have people affect me that much. You know?
... *Contemplates for a moment before he suddenly scoops her up bridal style, lifting her with ease*
Woah, what are you doing!?
What are you talking about, doofus?
You weigh, like, nothing to me.
That's because you have super human strength!
Yeah, and so what? Even without it I can still lift you as easily and can do this. *Starts to spin her around.*
*Lets out a little squeak as she wraps her arms around Sam's neck and quickly starts to laugh as he continues to spin them both around*
*Slows to a stop* There we go, that's better. *Waits for her to calm her giggles before he touches his forehead to hers* It doesn't matter how much to weigh, I'll carry you around the whole friggin' world if it'll make you happy. Those asshole who don't know you like I do, don't fucking matter. You're beautiful, oofus. That's a fact.
*Stares into Sam's eyes and her face glows from her smiling. She leans forward and hugs him tight while still in his arms* I love you Sam.
As your wedding planner, I need to warn you about a major crisis regarding your wedding reception. Since Santana's grandmother is no longer attending (such a shame), there is now an empty seat at the Lopez family table and I don't know what to do about it. The problem isn't removing a chair, the problem is adding chairs because several other members of Santana's family want that spot.
Family are the people who embrace you with open arms, no matter what.
They can see the pain in your eyes, even when you're fooling everyone else.
Family's about laughing louder, smiling bigger, and living better.
Family's like fudge, mostly sweet with a couple of nuts.
Though we are not related by blood, we are bonded by something much stronger: love.
And it might be a little presumptuous, but we'd like to be in your wedding party.
And the new kids and I would be honored to cater, pass out programs, and release the doves (there had better be doves).
You sit down on your bed and pop open your laptop for another hour of research. Sam was in the library and Dean was either eating or taking a nap, maybe both knowing him. Your phone buzzed next to you and the name ‘Sam’ lit up on the screen. You unlocked your phone and opened the message to see a picture of him hard. The only thing was, he wasn’t wearing anything over it. You gasped sharply and threw your phone at the foot of the bed. The image was burned into your mind, you shook your head and tried to blink it away, but nothing helped. You slowly got up and hesitantly picked up your phone, the picture still bright on your screen. You stared at it for what you knew was too long and then closed it. Sam hadn’t sent any words with it, so maybe he accidentally sent it to you. You type 'Uh, wrong person?’
The gray bubble pops up on the left of your screen, dots circulating. The words that came after were 'Actually, you are exactly the right person. :)’
Shit. Sam… He- what? You went and sat on your bed again, still thinking about the picture. This turned you on. Sam turned you on. You had never-
A light moan fell from your lips as your phone vibrated between your legs. Why did you set it there?
'How’s my baby?’ You read the message at least five times before replying 'Since when am I your baby?’ with a smug look.
'Since you stared at that picture as long as you did.’
What the fuck?! Did he have cameras in your room?! Jedi mind tricks?! You felt your face get hot and red.
'I gotta admit, that was pretty nice. ;)’ you quickly text back.
'There’s more where that came from.’ You could just imagine the look on his face right now.
Damn, this really did turn you on. Sam had never, ever since you’ve known him, been like this. Especially with you. 'I have a little something for you too.’ You snapped a picture of your cleavage and sent that.
'Oh, you don’t want to tease
me. 😈’ Sam quickly texted back.
'I think I do.’ You sent a picture of your thighs that time.
Sam shot back a picture that started with his belly button, to him tugging at the waistband of his jeans. You bit your lip at how you wish that could be your hand. You sent back the same sort of picture, tugging at the waist band on your shorts.
'Damn, you’re gorgeous.’ He replied.
'And you, are sexy as hell. 😏’ you laughed at yourself and the fact that this was actually happening.
'Glad to know I can live up to Crowley. 😋’ he texted.
'Lol, so Sam… What’s with the sudden burst of feelings for me?’ You gulp as you hesitantly press send.
Nothing. Then you see him type for a minute. It stops. Your heart is pounding hard against your rib cage and it feels like a hummingbird, begging to get out. Typing. Nothing. Typing for a couple minutes. Then a message pops up. 'Well, I was reading about how these creatures mate… And how similar it is to humans. They spend a lot of time together, then one day they develop feelings and just get together. I don’t know… But I thought of you and how much time we spend together. And I got a little excited…’
'Yeah Sam. I saw.’ You snickered and hoped he heard it through text.
'Would you like a live show?… We ask for volunteers. 😉’ you thought you almost heard him giggle all the way from the library.
'Oh idk… I’m kind of enjoying this Sam. 😆’
He sends another picture just like the first. You groaned and bit your lip at the picture, staring even longer this time.
'Don’t taunt me Sam. Plus, we’re sexting, not snapchatting. 🙊’
'What’s behind those hands (y/n)?’
'😳’ you clear your throat. Maybe there was a reason you and him had never done this before. You waited a solid five minutes, still no more messages. 'Sam, you know I was joking right?’ You pace the room nervously.
'Come to the library.’
'Gladly. 😊’ you look yourself over, fixing your clothes (although they would probably be in a pile on the floor in five minutes), and combing through your hair with your fingers. You walked out into the hall and out to the library. You skipped to the library excitedly, hoping today was your day to finally get laid by a Winchester. Your phone buzzed in your pocket. 'Come find me. 😋’
'The library is huge! How am I supposed to do that?’ You quickly typed.
'Look down each aisle of shelves. If I’m not there, remove an article of clothing. Then move to the next aisle. 😏’
'Shit, Sam. Once I get a hold of you… I swear…’
'😂’ Sam texted before your other message hardly got out.
'Can I get a hint or something?’ You ask.
'Start on the left shelves. Hurry, I’m growing impatient. 😈’
'You aren’t the only one.’ You snarked.
You walked to the left, the first aisle… Empty. You remove your shirt and continue. Aisle two, also empty. You remove your tank top. Next aisle vacant… Buh bye jeans. Doesn’t he want to take off ANY of your clothes himself? Guess not. The next aisle empty. You throw your bra down and that leaves you in your underwear. Now this is just pissing you off. Your brow begins to furrow in frustration until you see Sam in the next aisle. He was fully dressed. “What the hell? Why did I have to get undressed but you didn’t?”
“I thought you might like to undress me.”
“You thought right.” You smiled. You walked over to him beginning to remove his jacket and then his shirt. He pulled you in close, grabbing your ass. You moan into each other’s mouths as he grinds himself against you, giving the friction you both crave. You pull away from him to pull his pants down and throw them at the books in one swift move. He wraps his arms around your waist, pulls your feet off the ground and shoves you into the shelf. There would be bruises tomorrow, but not from the books. “Fuck, you’re so hot. And so wet for me.” He grunted and moved a hand down to your panties. You moaned as he stuck his fingers in them and pulled them down. He let you down to the floor, still pushing you against the books, kissing you violently. “Saaam-” you moan. “I need you. Now Sam.” You gripped his shoulders as he pushed into you slowly, letting you adjust. He then got up to speed, his hips slapping against yours. You could hardly hear the flesh on flesh over the ridiculous moaning from the both of you. “SAM!!!” You screamed into his neck and you went over the edge. He started trembling and he went over his edge in seconds. Once you were both done you got down to the floor, panting next to each other. You laid on top of him and he whispered sweet nothings into your ear as you stroked his hair. In this moment you felt bliss, and comfort. You would never leave his side as long as you lived.
"-the I’m walking in the mall and you just pulled me aside before some creep could get near me and you don’t know if he was trying to steal my wallet or what but you’re really attractive and I’m kind of flustered now au" for sam/josh? also this is my first time messaging you so i'm a little nervous but!!! i really like your blog and your fics so hi and ily and... yeah!!!
Sam knows it’s a bad idea the second she walks out of the car.
It’s dark outside, and this part of town is completely foreign to her, and she can hear some drunk frat boys laughing loudly somewhere close. It’s okay, she tells herself, she just needs to grab a bottle of cheap wine (or three) and get back to Ashley’s new apartment. She’s strong, she’s fast, and she can defend herself. Also, she’s fearless. Yup. The bravest child-sized adult to ever walk this earth.
She calms herself down somewhere between the dairy and snacks aisles, and forgets the obnoxiously noisy losers completely by the time she reaches the brightly lit alcohol display. She doesn’t kid herself into thinking that she knows what she’s doing, so she just picks the ones with animals on the labels. She gets distracted by an amazingly detailed drawing of an octopus, and doesn’t even notice when someone touches her shoulder blade lightly.
“Ah, there you are, honey! I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” a manly voice exclaims.
She feels her hands growing cold with anxiety. She really wanted to avoid this. She turns around, ready to tell him she’s not in the mood for whatever pickup line he’s trying to serve her, but something in his expression stops her. He’s tall, very tall, and pretty damn cute. Sharp jaw, big, tired eyes, full lips - she gets flustered just by looking at them, and she almost misses the slight tilt of his head, gesturing her to look over his shoulder.
“Y/N–I really need to tell you something,” Dean said, avoiding your eyes. You waited patiently for him to go on and say the words he’d begun but never finished so many times before. Sam interrupted though, sneaking in behind Dean’s shoulder and startling him.
“Sam, what the hell are you doing?” Dean asked, looking over his shoulder. Sam let out a laugh, standing tall again and looking between the two of you.
“I don’t know. I’m bored.”
“Well, you should go ask if you can buy Jody a drink–birthday girl shouldn’t have to pay for her own,” Dean said. “Y/N and I were kind of in the middle of something.”
“I doubt that, but it sounds more interesting than the bar,” Sam said, taking a seat next to the visibly chagrined Dean. “What were you guys talking about?”
I'm glad people are finally realizing how fucking disrespectful and flippant Sam Pepper is. Almost exactly a year ago, I went to a concert (Bryan Stars Tour) at the Epicenter. Sam and Maz were there before the concert had started, riding around on their skateboards in the parking lot. My friend and I, along with a group of obvious fans of them, saw them and tried to get close to them and flag them down, because I mean, if you see one of your favourite YouTubers, you're gonna want to meet them.
Sam and Maz clearly saw our group trying to get their attention, and would purposefully skate right near us and when we would try to go up to them, they would laugh and ride away quickly before we could reach them. Teasing us, basically. At this time, I didn’t actually know Sam Pepper too well, but I did watch Maz. Eventually, the seven(ish) of us gave up, and returned to the line for the concert. During the performance, (when Ghost Town was playing) Sam Pepper was literally right in front of me
He was wearing a black hoodie, that way no one would recognize him, which is understandable. He was there for the concert and didn’t want to be bombarded with fans, but since a handful of us had already seen him before the concert started, we already knew what he was wearing; I didn’t say or do anything to call him out, though. I hadn’t payed attention to him for long, because I only cared about the band playing.
Eventually, the air was getting really thick and I couldn’t breathe with all of the sweatiness and body odor, so I went to the back of the venue to catch my breath. At the back entrance, Maz and Sam were there and, of course, a few of us were like “holy shit can i just get a quick picture”, doing our best to be discreet and not cause a scene. But Sam literally just sighed, rolled his eyes, and walked away, telling Maz to “come on let’s go”. Maz stayed for a few minutes and got pictures with us.
Maz never once said “no” or acted like a douche, but rather, he put on a smile and was like “alright only for a little bit, because we have to go”. And I still have the picture of me with Maz from that night. Not to mention, this year at VidCon, there was a HUGE cluster of girls waiting for Sam, Maz, and Harrison, and my friend and I happened to be there when the guys first arrived. Sam didn’t even say hi or greet us, he just got annoyed with the amount of people and yelled “GET IN A LINE”
He literally started grabbing us and putting us in a line, and kept yelling “IF YOU AREN’T IN THIS LINE, YOU ARE NOT GETTING A FUCKING PHOTO SO DONT TRY TO SNEAK IN” and certain people who had just joined the scene were obviously trying to squeeze into the line, but Sam went and pointed at the people who weren’t exactly at shoulder-to-shoulder with people and said “YOU ARE NOT GETTING A PICTURE”. The three guys then just went along the line, and popped their heads next to ours and took a selfie.
The whole selfie-line was actually a good idea, but he wasn’t doing it to try and get everybody, but instead he just wanted to get it over with and not waste time speaking to everyone. After that, I lost all respect for him, because he truly seems like he doesn’t give two fucks about his fans. Then his latest video happened, and I’m glad. Sorry for my extremely long story; I just felt like every detail should be included, and I have a habit of being super wordy! Hope this helps in some way!!
the part with the skateboarding and then skating away from everybody trying to get a picture is EXACTLY what he was doing to the girls at vidcon, like, EXACTLY.
(maz was the friend he was with @ vidcon by the way, and from what i remember he was acting similarly to what you describe. he was clearly the more polite one and was willing to take pictures, whereas sam was an immature douchebag and kept skating away every time they took out their phones/cameras/etc)
thank you for sharing!!! it rlly does mean a lot, especially since people still dont believe he’s actually a douchebag. thank you for being able to tell me this!! <3333