Here's one; Farmer gets a new boyfriend/girlfriend that isn't one of the Bachelors/Bachelorettes. How do said Bachelors/Bachelorettes (who may or may not crush on them) react?
Sam: He really beats himself up over it. He should have just asked the farmer out when he had the chance. He writes a slew of songs to vent is feelings. Despite kicking himself he’s still upbeat around the farmer.
Sebastian: He figures this is how things are meant to go. The farmer’s cool, but obviously they don’t need him. No use thinking of what-ifs. He’ll just go back to crushing on Abigail.
Alex: What does this other person have that he doesn’t? He’s attractive! He’s strong! What else could the farmer want? He kinda just assumed things would work out in his favor. Maybe he should do some introspection. What doesn’t he have, honestly?
Elliott: It hurts. He thought, maybe, there could be something between them. He tries to keep his head held high, but it’s hard. Being a pining, lovelorn fool isn’t a very charming look, but it’s an easy role to fall into.
Harvey: He considers himself a professional man. Right, of course it was silly to think he and the farmer could be anything more. He’s their doctor, they are his patient, it’s better if things stayed that way. He’s dealt with disappointment before. It’ll hurt a while, but life moves on. He’s got a job to focus on.
Shane: Why did he ever think he had a chance? Just when he thought that maybe… No, of course they farmer would end up with someone else. Shane would end up closing himself off from the farmer. Maybe not completely, but the walls would be back up. He’d also have an impressive stink eye for their new partner.
Penny: Ah… this shouldn’t be surprising. She’s just some poor girl in a small town, it’s not like she’s anything particularly desirable. She wishes she could just make her feelings go away for the farmer, that would make things so much simpler. Perhaps she’d be a bit quieter around the farmer and their partner, but she’d still be friendly and polite. Maybe casting forlorn glances at the farmer from across town.
Abigail: Feelings are stupid. She hates them. She thought the farmer could bring some excitement to the valley, and now they’re running around with someone else. Leaving her behind. She’s angry, though she’s not sure at who. Herself? The farmer? Their partner? Ugh, she’s going to lock herself in her room and marathon the Prairie King until she beats it.
Haley: It’s not fair! Everyone should be falling over themselves to date her! Just when she started to think the farmer might be worth her attention they go off and get someone else? The farmer doesn’t know what they’re missing out on! They could have had the cutest girlfriend in the Ferngill Republic! She’s going to complain to Alex. He’ll agree with her that the farmer’s partner doesn’t hold a candle to her!
Leah: She’s happy for the farmer, truly. She should really be focusing on her art, anyway. Also acting on her growing feelings and starting another relationship probably wouldn’t be a good idea. She thought Kel and her were a good match and that didn’t really pan out. Yes, this was probably for the best.
Maru: Well, you win some you lose some. It’s her own fault for not pursuing anything. She has other things to occupy herself with anyway. What with working at the clinic, helping out her dad, and her own robotic projects. She’s not too heartbroken about it. There’s other fish in the sea.
Emily: Disappointment isn’t a foreign feeling to her, but it is a rare one. She prefers to look on the bright side of things. Perhaps she might have wanted something a little more with the farmer, but it’s wonderful that they’ve found a relationship. In time she’ll get over it, for now she’ll be happy love exist in the world.
Imagine a person, a young person, sitting alone in their office break room. They are deep in thought thinking about all of the terrible things that could happen. They think “my hair will turn gray and I will get wrinkles and nobody will want me” and “my mom and dad will die someday” and “what if something happens to my loved ones”.
Not worry so much as absolute terror at the prospect.
Now here’s the thing. That terror accomplished nothing at all. Oh, not true. It may have provided the impetus to get things moving, change some habits or take some actions but those things are going to happen anyway.
So, was this person wasting their time by subjecting themselves to this terror?
Well, no, not exactly but it can be handled in the mind in a way where the terror is seen for what it is. The attachment of the mind to the way things used to be might be or might have been. This terror is a remnant of an ancient emotion which protected our ancestors in a time when we were still more animal than human.
The evolved human being can control the terror and use its power by directing it in a positive way.