I still miss you but it’s not the same anymore. I won’t call and I refuse to let my hands reach out for you because I have learned the hard way that you are not a place I can rest upon. You were never a safe place for me to reside in and there was nothing sacred about the way you disarmed me if it was only for your convenience. I became soft for you. I lost my fear of stepping out into the open and I did it for you. I never should have. I should have retrieved my heart on the day where all the casualties began to pile up on my side of the battlefield. And even then, in the death of everything good that I used to be, I still found ways to love you. Maybe they weren’t always good. But I did my best. Even from here, years after the soil has forgotten all the blood I spilled there, I am still loving you in the only way I know how- with my hands at my side, a phone call log that doesn’t remember your phone number and a heart that still loves you but has grown too tired to try to make a home amidst your war zone.
pros and cons to getting married to your best friend: for aros
getting to have a wedding, family will stop bothering you about when you're going to meet someone, forever sleepovers, tax deductions, getting a nice place together, pooling together your book/game/movie collection, having someone to talk to in person whenever
idk they'll probably steal your favorite food nothing is sacred
- I had someone very dear to me change. It wasn’t in an instant, it was gradual…little choices that began to pile up. He told me not to worry. At first they were accidents, then it was self defense. Before long, even I began to think he was right. […] But you’re not him.