saber day

randomthingsthatilike123  asked:

Just curious-what do you think would have happened in Star Ears if Padme had survived?

I think Yoda would still want to hide and separate the children. I think Padme would refuse, and I hope Obi Wan would help–

Because wouldn’t that be fun? Padme, who ruled a planet, who challenged a senate, who married a horror, who can pick her own locks while handcuffed in the middle of a gladiatorial arena– now on the run with her two infants and only a heartbroken Obi Wan to back her up. 

(And R2D2, of course.) 

Padme’s always been the practical sort, even when royal, so she knows how to change a diaper and feed a child. She also knows how to fly the stolen ships Obi Wan and R2D2 hack into, how to bargain in thirteen intergalactic languages,  how to spot a bounty hunter in a crowd, and how to shoot a blaster with deadly intent. 

Padme was in love with someone who maybe never even existed– maybe once, there had been a boy who wanted to help people, who risked his life and his pod racer for someone else’s story, who made a young girl laugh in a sand-worn mechanic’s shop. 

She had been chasing him for years, that once good heart, but now with these bruises purpling and fading around her neck, she stops waiting. She starts running. Every time Obi Wan force-moves something over the next few weeks, she has to bury a flinch. 

But Leia is growing in fits and spurts, eating greedily and crying loudly. She stays in a sling on Padme’s chest when they move, Luke held snug in a sling around Obi Wan’s. Luke gets a whole head of thick brown hair while Leia’s is still patchy and bald, but he never matches his sister’s powerful lungs. 

When Padme had been sitting in her high senatorial apartment on Corsucant, holding Anakin’s sweaty hand, she had never imagined she’d be murmuring desperately soothing noises to her fussy daughter while she shot around a corner at stormtroopers, while R2D2 meddles with a ship’s blast doors behind her. 

Luke starts teething on a hot jungle planet where they hunker down for three weeks, sleeping in an abandoned old temple and catching the local wildlife for dinner. Leia takes her first steps in the belly of a Corellian freighter they’ve stowed away on. She wobbles between Padme’s outstretched hands and Obi Wan’s knees and boxes of smuggled luxuries. When she falls down, Obi Wan surges forward, heart in his throat, but Leia laughs. 

Padme lost a husband, but Obi Wan lost a brother and his whole order– his world, his people, his family. 

(One day, Leia’s whole home planet will vaporize and die under Vader’s–Anakin’s–command, and Obi Wan will find himself in the wreckage of it, the place Alderaan used to be, and he will recognize the sorrow shrieking into the Force.) 

But for now– Padme watches Obi Wan win them funds in gambling halls, grin into the teeth of a good flyer chase, sleep with Leia strewn over his chest, and Padme wonders if he isn’t more heartbroken here over Anakin than she is. 

Luke learns to walk a whole few months after Leia, but he falls less. He moves around the rim on mechanic’s shops, freighter cargo holds, makeshift camps on green planets, holding onto stable things and frowning seriously. Leia tries to leap from walking to running with no lead up time at all. She is not without scraped knees and scabby heels of her palms for years. 

They manage to spend a whole eight months on a little Outer Rim planet in a sleepy agrarian settlement. Padme and Obi Wan repair farming droids while R2D2 plays nursemaid (both Leia and Luke will be fluent in droid by the time they’re six). Luke and Leia play rough-housing games in the dry dirt– this is the first time they’ve stayed anywhere long enough to learn other children’s names. On day two hundred and thirty six they hear reports of stormtroopers so they pack up and hop on a transport at the nearest spaceport, not even bothering to check where it’s going. 

When they fly their own ships, they strap Luke and Leia into the same passenger’s seat and Padme and Obi Wan narrate. “Here you’ve got to always turn off the compressor before you activate the initiator…” “See the flashy blue light? Gotta have all the blue lights flashing…”

They hear reports of the empire growing. They see it– stormtroopers in more and more distant outposts, imperial ships passing them in the skies. Obi Wan lost the Jedi cloak years ago. They plate R2D2 in matte grey paint. Padme cuts her hair short and dresses in many-varied-layers like any refugee– because that’s what she is now, she and her little family.

Obi Wan has two lightsabers. He thinks Padme doesn’t know– he has the one he fights with, holding back stormtroopers and reflecting bounty hunters’ blaster shots, but he also has another one, tucked into the bottom of his pack. 

“It’s Anakin’s, isn’t it?” Padme asks one late night, tucked in a stony sheltered hollow on a planet that storms warm rain thirty-eight hours out of the day’s forty-two. Obi Wan gives a soft laugh and puts his hand over his eyes as Padme goes on, “The saber you’re hiding from me.” 

He nods, slowly, lets his hand fall. “I took it from him, when I left him for dead.”

“Not dead enough,” says Padme. “You’re keeping it in case yours gets lost?”

“Yes,” he says slowly. “Or in case… we might need another light saber, some day.”

Luke is bouncing a X-wing fighter toy along the wet pebbles. Leia is beeping something at R2D2, giggling over the rainfall. 

“Hm,” says Padme. “We might need another two.” 

here’s another fresh homemade meme y’all

  • Kiritsugu: Irisviel Von do I begin to explain Irisviel Von Einzbern?
  • Saber: Irisviel Von Einzbern is flawless.
  • Gilgamesh: I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Maiya: I hear she does car Japan.
  • Kirei: One time she punched me in the face.
  • Kirei: It was awesome.
A Thought Just Occured to Me...

So… Star Wars Episode 8: The Jedi Is Plural You English Speaking Wierdos is coming out right?

And Luke Skywalker is finally FINALLY going to be in it. Right?

The Last Jedi Master.

Who has his own lightsaber and really at this point would he even want Anakin’s lightsaber back? Like, “You know what, on second thought? I talked to Ben Kenobi and I’m going to let you keep it the saber okay? No! No particular reason just… you keep it.”

And I’m sure there will be some fighting and not because I have used the dark powers of the internet or anything like that but… because… it is… Star WARS.

And the wars kind of implies violence.

Jedi wage war with lightsabers.

Which means Luke will be using his badass green saber in a battle.

All this is the preamble to… What if Luke does the Obi-Wan Kenobi pose before a battle? 

Like he’s confronted with the Knights of Hot Topic and he tells Rey to run on ahead because they have to save the thing from the First Order and Bigly Leader Snoke and she does so reluctantly. Luke is surrounded. He is one and they are many. They have youth, fanaticism and numbers on their side. 

Luke has only the Force.

Luke has only ever needed the Force.

“The last Jedi dies today,” snarls one of the black-clad figures, brandishing his weapon. “We shall finish what Darth Vader started.”

Luke smirks in that vague Jedi way because he knows the Force is with him.

Moving with far more grace and subtlety than one would expect from the old, disheveled looking man, Luke relaxes into a high defensive stand, left hand extended with the Force focused at the end of his extended finger tips and right hand pulled back by his temple, offense and defense perfectly balanced.

“Oh, I don’t think so.”


My sister gave my mom a gift yesterday. Because although we never really had a father, we can appreciate the person who took up that role and more to raise us!

Whether that person is your neurotic cousin, your hard-working single mom, or your caring war veteran dad- Happy Father’s day!

(Post is a lil late but ah well!)

Fencing Valentine's Day Lines

Warning: These are insanely stupid and I’m totally going to hell for half of these

•I hope no one foils your Valentine’s Day

•I’d like to saber this Valentine’s Day with you

•I’d like to see your flèche (yes I got nothing that has epee in it)

•I’d like to touch you on and off the strip

•I really know how to use my fingers (too much?)

•I’d really like to hook up with you, both ways

•I may be a A ranked fencer, but I’m an R rated lover

•I could hit you with my saber but I’m looking to score off target 😉

•What does epee and our date tonight have in common? You can put it wherever you want

•I’ll trade you a touch for a touch 😘

•You’re parry important to me

•Babe you’re like Leon Paul, everyone wants you

• Not even my fencing equipment can protect me from falling for you

•Our love is like a red card, I’m always gonna get a touch

•Babe our relationship is like Leon Paul, you look nice as fuck, but you’re expansive as sh*t!

•You can’t disengage around my love

•My sex life is just like an old foil, it’s just a little rusty

•I bet you’re as good down on your knees on strip as you are off strip

•You look beautiful wearing white, going up the strip, but how would you like to wear white going down the isle?

•Your love is like a mask clip, it’s always flying away!

•Babe you’re like a nice pair of knickers, I could see myself in you

•Love, we’re like a body cord and a reel, were connected

•I bet your yell is even better off strip

•Babe you don’t need to wear protection it’s not like fencing, I won’t hit your head, but I’ll definitely give you some (too much?)

•Tonight will be like point of line, you advancing all over my sword

•Our sex life is like a cross-step, you just came right into me (yea ok that was too much my bad)

•Babe you’re like a parry repost. You’re the priority

•Our sex life is like a fencer who flicks, half the time it’s gonna get on my chest, but once and a while if you’re lucky, you’ll get it on my back (ok these are getting too inappropriate… bad)

•If you like the bruises you get from my blade than I can give you a bunch more with something else