Pierce Brosnan made a mermaid movie but nobody is allowed to see it!!!
i was casually browsing pierce brosnan’s wikipedia page tonight when i noticed something v exciting: he recently filmed a MERMAID FANTASY MOVIE where he plays KING LOUIS XIV. how had i not heard about this?
this is clearly the best film ever made:
“King Louis XIV’s quest for immortality leads him to capture and steal a mermaid’s life force, a move that is further complicated by his illegitimate daughter’s discovery of the creature.” [x]
Kaya Skodelario plays the daughter. Fan Bingbing plays the mermaid. there are also a bunch of men but i don’t care about them.
naturally i was very excited to hear about this movie, for the obvious reason that it stars A MERMAID alongside PIERCE BROSNAN IN A HISTORICAL WIG. but then i noticed something ominous: it’s been delayed. “indefinitely” delayed. since April 2015.
usually when a film gets delayed for that long, it means one of two things: it’s an unwatchably terrible box office disaster in the making, or there’s some weird legal shit going on behind the scenes.
but whatever the reason, seriously: Paramount Pictures, i do not care. please deliver the goods on this PIERCE BROSNAN MERMAID MOVIE. it’s a cultural necessity.
a visiting lord trying to goad cassandra into marrying him/his son and being incredibly condescending and insisting that she can’t rule whitestone alone (and cassandra doesn’t want to rule whitestone alone, of course, but that’s why she has percy and vex and the rest of the whitestone chambers helping her) and he just. will not take the hint no matter how many times cassandra politely turns him down.
and while she’s always polite but firm, after a while she realizes that won’t work with this lord and she can’t be rude for fear of making whitestone look bad.
so the obvious solution that vex finds after observing how uncomfortable cass is with the entire situation is to just have trinket loom outside the lord’s room ominously. not attack him, but just sit there watching. once the lord takes to barring himself inside the room more often, tell him to occasionally make grunts and growls just to remind him he’s there. fart a lot. the servants and guards make sure to give him lots of pets for doing his job so well.
the lord puts a timely end to his stay and never contacts cass again, and anything he could say would be disregarded because 1) people who have never been to whitestone won’t believe that there’s a bear just sitting in the castle 2) people who HAVE been know he’s harmless and think the lord is a fucking idiot
trinket is all too happy to play his part in getting rid of the man who’s been bothering his new aunt and she is very grateful for her nephew’s hard work.
Can I just say I love the (assumed) flavor split between Amonkhet and Hour of Devestation? Amonkhet cards are harsh but none of them are "yes, there, that's the bad guy" or "oh so this is how we all die" but half the set is waving their infernal spawns of evil saying "it's comiiing!" It's so wonderfully ominous
Why do you necessarily assume something is going to go bad in a set entitled Hour of Devastation?
I’m doing a sort of kind of live-blogging of the new Adventure Time miniseries, “Elements” (of the leaks anyway, because CN is incompetent and I’m immoral well iTunes same difference). I’m going to write a proper, collective review (along with “Orb”), but I have to get my thoughts out before that. So, starting with “Skyhooks”:
the “Elements” title cards are simply just gorgeous
Jake just ran out of fucks to give and it’s wonderful
Finn has grown so much, like his first reaction to everything being candy is to think it was PB messing it all up again, and honestly? fair enough, at leats he’s not idolizing her anymore but seeing her for the problematic fave she is
Lemonpink is just as disturbing as Lemongrab, bless Justin Roiland
“Sour’s get the tower” well that’s not ominous at all
“maybe they don’t need you to fix them” wow Jake, offering some deep advice right off
just at the moment I was thinking Marcy wouldn’t be in this miniseries at all, she’s A FUCKINg MARSHMELLOW… THING! PB the fuck have you done
Marshmeline… yeah right
“anyone that’s overwhelmed with work or responsibility” so you wrote that song for your girlfriend, basically, bless you Marcy- Marshie, I guess
NO, guys, I wanted to hear that song, dammit
Olivia Olson humming Greensleeves… something I never knew I needed yet my life before seems devoid of perfection
“she’s everywhere” okay Marcy I appreciate the heart eyes but that’s creepy
“fixed them” oh PB you sick tyrant, love Finn fighting back tho
I have a lot of feels about Marshie hanging around PB even still, despite the whole concept being fucked up… #shippingituntiltheend
BMO is just so chill, sometimes I envy that
Ice King saves the day, because of course he does
Skyhooks, hmm, curious that the title should gain significance at the very end, especially considering that the last ep is called “Skyhooks II”, so we’re getting a nice frame again
Hm, I've been wondering.. is there any reason why the survivors color scheme are red and black? Or there isn't anything at all? :0 I'm not sure if someone have talked about this, and I was curious so..
This is a pretty fun question! I wouldn’t know if there’s
any definitive reason per se, but I do feel like it represents a pretty strong
stylistic choice. There’s some pretty heavy imagery revolving around red and
black throughout the DR franchise, so the choice of having all three survivors
feature that color scheme in one way or another feels like it does have
meaning, at least in my opinion.
i’ll be honest, i’m scared to open the doc of my novel with final annotations from my editor. it’s so big. so ominous. so close to the end. i feel the same nerves i feel before entering a final boss battle.
Gabriel Reyes (while still in blackwatch) with an angel of death s/o?
Gabriel sat in his office, staring at all the foreboding news flash across the screen. Overwatch tensions were rising, and the world was not taking it well. But it wasn’t taking it nearly as bad as he was; after all, he was the one planning the mutiny. As he watched the headlines, he felt a presence behind him.
“It’s ominous to see you around here more often,” Gabriel smirked, glancing back at the dark angel.
Folding their black wings neatly, they said, “I go wherever I sense death, my dear, and this place reeks of it,”
“Nobody’s died yet,” Gabe tapped around on his holo screen.
“But they will, I can feel it,” they sighed.
At first, Gabriel found his s/o’s strange “death-sensing” habit to be unnerving. But overtime, he got used to it, letting them go whenever they sensed a death somewhere nearby. And now, he really liked the whole “angel of death” style, he wouldn’t have minded taking up that style himself.
But now, he was starting to worry about the habit again. On one hand, his s/o could have been hanging around him more because they were an item and they just happened to sense death on base anyways. But on the other hand, they could have been hanging around him specifically because they smelt the most death from him.
Slowly turning in his office chair, he gave them a worried look, “I’m not one of this people that’ll die, will I?”
They just stared back at him without expression and without a word.
“Well?” he asked again.
Turning to look out the window, his s/o muttered, “I smell death everywhere, it’s difficult to place the scent anywhere specific,”
But he could tell by that vague response that they knew. [Name] had been an angel of death for far too long to not know these things.
“[Name],” he said threateningly as he stood up from his desk, “You need to tell me. Am I going to die?”
“Everyone on this base will die,” they said simply.
He felt himself growing increasingly more impatient with them, approaching them with clenched fists.
“[Name], quit this vague bullshit,” he growled.
“It’s not my place to tell people if they’ll die,” they droned.
“[Name]!” he shouted, grabbing them by the wrist and forcing them to look at him, “Tell me! Am I going to die?!”
“YES!” they suddenly screamed, “Yes! Fine, you’re going to die tomorrow!”
Then the room suddenly got deathly quiet. The answer was out, and although Gabe had wanted it, now he wasn’t so sure. Now that he knew, he felt a pit settle in his stomach. He was going to die tomorrow, and part of him feared it would be by Morrison’s hands.
“How?” he muttered.
“I’ve already said too much,” they spat.
He went to raise his voice, but the angel slapped him across the face, sending him stumbling back.
“Stop it, Gabe, I’m your partner, not your personal fortune-teller!” they shot, “You’re becoming a monster, you know.”
That hurt and they could visibly see him cringe at the word “monster.” Leaving him with those words, they slid the office window open and flew away.
Ok I realize that that YouTube prank family is super fucked up and abusive but could we really not have an awareness post with a less funny title than “Something horrible is happening on youtube” bc I almost laugh out loud every fucking time I see it and idk why. It’s just so ominous and also like… all of YouTube is horrible