“yes, that’s the rzarector gettin’ it in with killah priest on the set of The Office. word is bond. son squats right there in the kitchen after filming, namsayin’? what? baby pa’s career’s been 6 feet deep, nahmean’?”
“now what a lotta cats don’t know is that this Liquid Swords joint is actually an artist’s rendering of the exact moment in the legendary 1985 match when John Nunn put Alexander Beliavsky’s chess nuts on the table - just his chess nuts on the table - and BANGED them shits with a spiked Saemisch Variation.”
“word up. the rza actually ran into wilt in a japanese airport back in 1998 during the bobby digital tour. cat kept braggin’ about how he had played chess against 20,000 different women in his lifetime. son wanted to play me too, but i had to pass, nahmean’?
seriously, son? 20,000? you know stilt caught some sorta chess transmitted some shit, namsayin’?”
“yeah, son, of course bobby steels remembers the 2007 hip hop chess federation tournament. not so much because i walked away with the title, nahmsayin’? but, because it was laundry day. rakaa iriscience still gives the god grief for my denim on denim. (sigh)”
“word is bond, god. gotta get this loot, gotta get this loot. the abbot actually faced zuckerberg the day his world wide chess ranking went public, nahmsayin’? son opened up mad high, but a few days later his status plummeted.”
“sometimes the abbot loses sleep over all these diabolical mathematical dragons trying to take him out, nahmean’? and the only way to get adjacent to the square root of his mind’s third eye is to master his rook to queen’s bishop 4 in the warmth and safety of limited edition wu wear satin sheets.”
“son, i knew i was in trouble when he opened with the caro-kann defence. took bobby steel out in 23 moves, god. word is bond. i was so impressed i foolishly signed him to a deal right then and there.
he turned out to be cappadonna, nahmsayin’? what? how else you think he got put on? "baby my love is still strong on some king kong ding-dong?” the fuck that mean, god? dude can’t rap for shit. but his middlegame is legendary.“
“old, rundown shorty was on some weird talking-to-herself type shit the whole match, namsayin’? i was buggin’ at first, but then i realized it was just a makeup-less mariah carey and it was like bong-bong.”
“i told the ginger-wig’d shorty that i couldn’t believe she pulled out a queenside castle in that situation. but all she said was that she couldn’t believe that anyone would pull out a helly hansen visor and tommy hilfiger sweatshirt in any situation. on some FML, namsayin’?”