ruki san

3

Ruki: I’m reading every single one of your birthday messages one by one. thank you so much for the many feelings you guys are giving me.
Ruki:  this year again I want to focus and work even harder to deliver exciting things to all of you! this year will already be the GazettE’s 15th anniversary. from now on I’ll be waiting for lots of fun things. let’s all make this an amazing year.
Ruki: also, I was finally able to announce 『NIL DUE / NIL UN  TOKYO』and I’ve been very particular about not only the music and images or the CD jackets but also all the things I am putting out including the website and LIVE GOODS.
Ruki: I’ve been thinking about it for a very long time, through the production of all kinds of things at some other point I decided to start NIL DUE / NIL UN  TOKYO as a place that would allow me to bring out all those items and things that I personally find really cool, things that I couldn’t quite display within the scope of LIVE GOODS only.
Ruki: I hope I can make this even more fantastic and add a touch of beauty to it with the music that I’ll be making myself. we will definitely be producing nice things so stay tuned! 🙆
Ruki: P.S.
it took us about half a year but yesterday we finally finished the mixing of the ballad best-of re-recording.
Ruki: looking back on all sort of things, I’m truly happy that I now have a place where I can express what’s on my mind and I wanna keep nourishing and cherishing this. I won’t let anyone take this away from me and it was a birthday that made me think, once again, that I wanna make lots of things that you guys will love for many many years to come 🤗
Aoi: he has something he wants to do. he has a place where he can express it.
I want him to enjoy this blessed environment and to bring out his talents to the full.
ah, I’m having Yakiniku*!\\\└(‚ω‘)┘////
*Yakiniku means grilled meat/BBQ

All members raji 3/24

Uruha (reading mail): “This isn’t related to the theme and it’s also kind of a boring question, but what’s a cool way to answer when your girlfriend asks you, ‘what’s more important, your job or me!?’” …….so guys what’s the answer?

Kai: Huhuhu! What’s a cool way to answer?

Uruha: But like is this something that ppl actually ask? 

Kai: “What’s more important, your job or me?” Well like I hear it in dramas but idk…that doesn’t mean anything (laughs) 

Uruha: But I mean if you said “my job” that would be bad, right? That would set them off?

Kai: No no no I don’t think so, at all! Rather if you said “you!” wouldn’t it seem…too much like a lie? (laughs) Well I mean I don’t know

Aoi: Hmmm- [Uruha: I wonder what the right answer is] -mmmmm……..you know….at that point….you should probably just break up with them no? 

Kai: (laughing) Like as soon as she asks you that? 

Uruha: This question is taboo, you know? As soon as this happens, it’s over. 

Reita: As soon as you say that, you’re not the most important thing anymore

Aoi and Uruha at same time: AWWWW! [not like aw thats cute but like AW SHIT FAM]

Reita: Cause u just asked that

Aoi: The shit-eating look u have on ur face rn istg

(laughter)

Uruha: So it’s like, you were the most important until you said that, you blew it now

Reita: Yes yes yes

Uruha: So that’s the right answer!

Reita: Well for me yeah

(Aoi and Uruha guffawing)

Uruha: What about you, Ruki-san?

Ruki: U-uhh, I don’t know..???! But like, u gotta work to make a living so…….

Uruha: So like, “it’s my job tf u thought”?

Ruki: Uh, like, if i don’t work…..I’m a NEET?? Like, I’d be unemployed, so….and then I wouldn’t be able to be with you anyway

Reita: What if she’s like “I don’t care if ur unemployed!”

Ruki: ….Oh yeah that’s okay then! 

Reita: You’d quit? 

Ruki: I’m cool with freeloading

Reita and Uruha: HUHUHUHU

Uruha: Ur ok with that

Ruki: But I mean that’s not the case [for the gf in the mail i guess] …she just wants attention

Aoi: But before it got to [the point where she would say that]…wouldn’t you have already ditched her?

Everyone: Ah mhm yes hmm maybe ur right ahh

Aoi: So maybe the guy is the bad one.

Everyone: Ahh I see so that’s your point of view ahh yes ok

Aoi: Thanks guys

(Everyone dies laughing)

Uruha: So Aoi-kun, if a girl asked you how would you answer? 

Aoi: “I’m sorry.”

(Everyone dies laughing again)

Uruha: “I’m sorry”….

Kai: YOU WOULD NOT! YOU WOULD NOT

Ruki: All u could do is cry. WAHH!!! WAHH!!!!!!!!

Reita: Man u just busted my ears

Everyone: HuhuhuHUHU

Uruha: Okay leader what about you?

Kai: Well I definitely wouldn’t say her. 

Uruha: Ahh, so it’s your job?

Kai: Yep. Anyone would say that, no? It’s your job. I mean, she’s a part of that!

Uruha: What?

Kai: Like, the fact that I’m working

Uruha: Ah that you’re making a living, it means you can take care of her

Kai: Yes yes 

Ruki: Yep, yep, yep

Uruha: Wow u really thought that through calml–

Kai: U CAN’T DO SHIT WITHOUT MONEY

Uruha: Op

Kai: Huhuhu sorry sorry 

All members raji 3/24 (two mails)

Ruki (reading mail): “Ruki-san, Uruha-san, Aoi-san, Reita-san, Kai-san, good evening. I listen to the radio every week. This isn’t related to the theme –” They’re never related to the theme!!

Reita: Ye pretty much

(Kai giggling or some shit)

Ruki: “I just broke up with my boyfriend.”

Aoi: Hm.

Uruha: Awwww!

Ruki: “I know it’s probably not good to compare him with other people I’ve dated, but he really made me happier than I’ve ever felt before. I just can’t accept it, so I’m going to become a better woman and get him back. That’s all.”

Reita: Oh, so she was dumped?

Kai: Wait, that’s all? (giggling)

Ruki: It says “that’s all.”

Reita: Huh?

Kai: That’s all?

Ruki: Huh? – Oh, uh, “I have a question for you,”

Reita: (giggling) Okay…

Kai: Mhhuhu

Ruki: “What is your idea of a ‘good woman?’ I’m curious because I feel like men and women would have different answers……uhhh…..I’m really looking forward to Gudon no Sakura.”

(pause)

Kai: Okay.

Ruki: You know even thought I read it I didn’t get any of that

(giggling)

Reita: That’s cause you’re bad at reading!

Ruki: What was it…

Uruha: What’s a good woman?

Kai: What’s a good woman?

(everyone is talking and then Aoi says something that makes everyone laugh but I didn’t get it :c)

Ruki (whining): But we’ve talked about girls so many times alreadyyyyy…

Uruha: We get asked every week!

Reita: It’s fiiiine!!

(everyone starts talking and laughing again)

Reita: We have to speak one by one!

Aoi: Do we have to start raising our hands?

Reita and Kai: No no it’s fine its fine (laughing)

Reita: We’ll do it with our faces

Kai: Yeah, ur face like “K IM GOING NOW”

Reita: Yep! Okay, so please answer one by one!

Uruha: But isn’t a good woman, you know, someone who doesn’t ask this kinda stuff?

Reita: Well said.

(Kai doing the Kai Laugh)

Reita: K NEXT

Kai: “What makes a good woman…”

(everyone laughing)

Aoi: But who’s going next!?

(everyone laughing)



Aoi: OKAY AOI DESU I’M GOING~

Uruha: (laughing) “I’m going”

Aoi: I think you’re wonderful just the way you are~

Reita: I see.

Aoi: Thank yoooooou~

Reita: That’s not the kind of answer she wants fam

(everyone laughing)

Reita: Hai, Reita desu~ Well, like Uruha-kun said, I don’t think that’s something you should ask so blatantly. Just leave the guy alone.

Kai: Like, that’s a sign of a good woman?

Reita: Make him swim. Make him swim until he’s about to drown. Then once he’s about to drown, go help him.

Kai: AhhHHH

Uruha: AhhHHH

Reita: That’s it.

Kai: Ahhhh I see

Reita: Yes.

Kai: So, what about Ruki-kun?

(pause)

(pause)

Ruki: ……….. –Yep! Uhh, “Good evening, everyone~”

(everyone laughing)

Aoi: Good evening~

Ruki: “This happened to me recently at work” (HE SKIPPED THE QUESTION LMFAOOO) “But I’m not sure if you would call this a Dark Side Story, so please evaluate it!”

Everyone: Okay.

Ruki: It’s Dark Side Mail, I see. “At work, my superior was saying stuff like ‘I lost weight recently! Even though I was already thin…’ I smiled and said, ‘yeah, you were always thin!’ and then she smiled too and was laughing, so I thought she was happy. But then later that day my coworker was like, ‘hey, did you do something to [the superior]?’ and I’m like, ‘uh, no??’ and then my coworker showed me texts between the two of them, and the superior was saying stuff like ‘[the gazefan] said something rude to me today’, ‘i think she’s trying to start a fight with me,’ ‘she was laughing at me isn’t that awful?’ I was like, what!? Since that day I’ve decided not to make any more casual comments to my superior anymore.”

(pause)

Ruki: “I’m sorry this was so long.”

(everyone bursts out laughing)

Kai: That’s it!?

Reita: That’s your fault! You’re so bad at reading!! [Ruck probably left a bunch of shit out lol]

Uruha: Wow, what a shitty person

Ruki and Aoi: Hmmmmm, yeh

Kai: Wait, who? The superior?

Ruki and Uruha: Yeah the superior

(pause)

Kai: …Wait why? What?

Uruha: What do you mean what?

Ruki: Hm. 

Reita: Well she was thin, and you know some people have a complex about being thin, right?

Uruha: What!? Oh really….

Reita: Yeah I’m pretty sure.

Kai: Oh so that’s it?

Uruha: So what, she wanted to be told she was a little chubby?

Reita: Or that she just didn’t think she was that thin so when someone told her she was thin it actually felt like they were teasing her – yeah idk shit about women.

(Kai laughing)

Uruha: Women……

Kai: Maybe she was thinking that the other girl [the fan who wrote in] was thinner?

Reita: Oh I get it! So being told she was thin by someone even thinner than her…

Kai: Right, right, like it felt like maybe she was being made fun of

Uruha: Ahhh….

Ruki: I see…

Aoi: Then you can’t really talk to her can you?

Kai (laughing): Yeah, for sure!

Reita: Yeah, you can’t~

Aoi: I feel like that too. With the Gazemen

Reita and Kai: Hehe, what? h-huh? ur jokin…

Aoi: I just

Uruha: But you know

Aoi: I just love u guys……

Uruha: But do you really have to tell them [that you’re mad]?

Kai: No but she didn’t, she heard it from another friend. Like, this girl said this about you.

Ruki: Ahhh…

Kai: Yeah I don’t think she told her herself.

Aoi: Hmmmm….

(Everyone goes ah yes hmmmmm for like 5 seconds or so)

Ruki: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh……………….

Reita: u ok?

(everyone gigglin)

Ruki: I’m just wondering what they want from us sending this mail. Like they’re not even like, what do you think – well whatever, her superior did that.

Kai: Do you want to read Abe-chan now? (laughs)

Ruki: Huhu, how many times have we read Abe-chan now?

Reita: We’ve read a lot.

Ruki: That much, huh! Then we don’t have to read Abe-chan, do we? It’s always the same thing.

(Everyone laughing)

(Ruki reads Abe-chan anyway tbc)

Talkative Ruki
  • I: Well, the image is, “ Ruki-san seems to talk a lot to himself when he’s alone.” We received something like that.
  • Ru: Hmm. Talking to myself when I’m alone.. But well, there’s my dog so I’m not really alone.
  • I: *laughs* Well, you can’t be alone, because you have a partner to talk to, right?
  • Ru: That’s why, because he will listen to me. Well..
  • Re: Aaah, poor dog.
  • *roars of laughter*
Ruki and Reita discussing eyeball licking

yep

so ruki read this one and before he began reading it, he and rei couldn’t figure out how to read the word “iris.” rei is like “i think it’s kousai” and ruki is like ehhh idk….eventually rei looks it up and it is in fact “kousai”

rei like “SEE i told u smh” and ruki’s like “…that was dumb luck”

they read this one as a scary story so there’s creepy bgm and ruki’s voice has an echo effect on it

Ruki: “Reita-san, Ruki-san. It’s very hot and humid, I hope you guys aren’t melting.”

(Reita snorts in background)

Ruki: “My ‘first time’ story is, a few years ago I licked someone’s iris – brackets – the part with the pupil.”

Reita: Yes.

Ruki: “Apparently if you fli– …if you fl– (trying not to laugh) if you flick your tongue on it it feels good, and I was pre….pre–(laughing)” (*there was some kind of typo here)

(Reita has been laughing in bg this whole time)

Ruki: “Pressured into doing it. I didn’t really want to do it because it freaked me out, but when I actually did it, it had a sweet taste and I was really surprised.”

Reita: Yes.

Ruki: “Have you two ever licked an eye before? Reita, if you haven’t, you should try it and let me know what you think!”

Reita: Okay. (nervous laughter)

Ruki: Bruh I just shed a tear.

Reita: Okay wait a second. (takes paper) So someone…told her to do it.

Ruki: Yeah.

Reita: They were like, hey lick my iris.

Ruki: Yeah.

Reita: And then she did it.

Ruki: Yeah.

Reita: …And it was kinda sweet.

Ruki: Yeah.

Reita: ……..Can I –

Ruki: (closes eyes) I knew you were gonna say that smh  

Reita: Open ur eyes

Ruki: (He either said ‘shinisou’ [I’m gonna die] or ‘shimisou’ [somethings gonna ooze out idk??????])

Reita: (laughing at own joke what else is new) …Damn so eye-licking kink is a real thing eh

Ruki: Yeah well I mean I’m not really surprised…it’s sweet though?

Reita: Is this a common fetish?

Ruki: Um obviously not

(both laugh)

Ruki: But like…the other person wanted her to do it, right? I wonder how she felt though…like at the end she says ‘it tastes pretty sweet’ but…even that kinda seems like [she wasn’t down]

Reita: Yeahh it’s kinda…

OH MY GOD I FUCKING HATE REITA OK SO HE SAYS

Reita: Doesn’t it kinda…smell like murder?

And my ass is sitting here and listening to it over and over again like WTF DOES THIS MEAN AM I MISSING SOMETHING and then

Ruki: Ah– ……..

(Reita laughs nervously)

(very long pause)

Reita: Shall we play a song?

Ruki: What? I thought you were good at this.

Reita: Ye I’m a natural

Ruki: Mhmm (showing Rei how it’s done now) We were having a pretty lit conversation just now…I got an equally lit song for u

Reita: (laughing ) O please

Ruki: This is like around the time you get tired right

Reita: Oh yeah cause it would be after two now right

Ruki: Yeah. Well I’ve listened to all the shows so far…and I gotta say some of you don’t play very fitting songs for the mood.

Reita: Oh, like songs that make you tired?

Ruki: Yeah or like they’re too noisy…but this one…this one is just right

Reita: Oh really?

Ruki: Yes

Reita: Oh I’d love to hear it

Ruki: Ok here it is… “Murder” by ROSSO

Like this idiot was trying to work the name of the song into the conversation and it made no fucking sense

And Ruki thinks the way he introduced it is better like

I quit the fandom

That's not funny at all.
  • Ruki: Poultry... come here.
  • MTK: Yes?
  • Ruki: Are you studying properly?
  • MTK: Uuuuhm. I still need a bit of time... to focus...
  • Ruki: *sighs* Poultry, concentrate. Otherwise Master will not reward you.
  • MTK: ... er, Ruki-san, are you okay?
  • Ruki: *smirks* Why, wouldn't you like to be rewarded by your Master? And I'd like to remind you that Master cares for you, so you need to study.
  • MTK: ...
  • Ruki: *sighs and approaches her* Seriously, Poultry... don't you understand? *holds her by her chin* I love you.
  • MTK:
  • MTK: Happy April Fools' day to you too, Ruki-san.
  • Ruki: *chuckles* I guess you're indeed clever enough to know when I'm joking. Or am I that bad of an actor?
  • MTK: I learnt to be careful on this day...
  • Ruki: Hm, is that so. Later, Poultry. *leaves*
  • MTK:
  • MTK: ...
  • MTK: *sighs* That was a very bad joke, Ruki-san... *goes back to study while sobbing*
  • [Bonus]
  • Laito: *appears* Funny-chan, I love you~
  • MTK: Yeah, Happy April Fools day to you too, Laito-kun.
  • Laito: ...! But-! D:
  • [Bonus #2]
  • Carla: You, woman. Are you painting?
  • MTK: Yes... *blushes* I'm portraying you, Carla-san... because I like you vey much...
  • Carla:
  • MTK:
  • Carla:
  • MTK: I guess you don't like this day...
  • Carla: No. I don't.
  • Carla: ...
  • Carla: I'd say you're quite good at acting, though.
  • MTK: ^w^-
  • [Bonus #3]
  • Subaru: Oi, Reiji...
  • Reiji: Mh? Subaru? Oh, that's a surprise, what is it?
  • Subaru: ... I want to... apologize... for always giving you trouble...
  • Reiji:
  • Reiji: *gasps*
  • Reiji: I-Indeed, you do... But how, all of a sudden...!
  • Subaru: Baka. It's the first of April, haha. *leaves*
  • Reiji:
  • Reiji: I hate this day very much.
  • Reiji: *internally sobbing*
  • [Bonus #4]
  • Azusa: Ne...
  • Azusa: I hate... all of you...
  • Azusa: And... my fa-...
  • Azusa: ...
  • Azusa: I cant'...
  • Azusa: I can't say this...
  • Azusa: I love... my family... and all of you...
  • Azusa: I would never... joke about it... :(
4

Ruki: NEW NAILS! this time I went with mirror nails and they’re more glittery than usual.
TOO DAMN PRETTY…👨‍👩‍👦‍👦
🌝 #newnails #mirrornails #chromepowder #thegazette #DOGMATIC 
Ruki: the BIG T-shirt in white. this is the length when I’m wearing it! the fabric is also quite durable so I do recommend it #thegazette #goods #blackmoral #radmarket #new
Ruki: here’s the BIG T-shirt in black!
I think, this one’s also easy to pair so I definitely recommend it. #thegazette #radmarket #blackmoral #goods #new
Ruki: the backpack. the size is pretty good even if you carry lots of stuff like I usually do. this one’s seriously nice ! ! #thegazette # radmarket #blackmoral #goods #new