rpg alignment

Those alternative D&D alignment charts that are going around kind of crack me up due to the history behind it.

I’ve posted about it before, but the TL;DR version is that the law/chaos axis of the D&D alignment system originally referred to cosmic principles, not personal convictions; there was an implicit assumption baked into the game’s default setting that Order and Chaos were cosmic forces locked in eternal battle for universal dominion, and that player characters would align themselves with one of those forces - indeed, that’s why it was named “alignment” in the first place.

So when you go and swap the law/chaos axis for, say, butch/femme, in light of that history one might reasonably suppose that you’re proposing a setting in which Butch and Femme are likewise cosmic principles locked in eternal battle.

And that’s where things get hilarious.

Like, who are the Gods of Butch? What weapons are their clerics permitted to wield? What does an Archon of Femme look like?

These are important questions.

It’s funny how, in spite of all the arguments and all the varying interpretations - concrete versus relative, personal ethos versus cosmic principles, etc. - there are certain characters where everybody just agrees what alignment they are. Like, no matter what interpretation you’re using, everybody’s on the same page that Jerry Seinfeld is Lawful Evil - no question whatsoever.

The Druid, using Speak with Animals to talk to a frog: Do know of an easy to get across the swamp into that temple?

Frog: You could swim.

Druid: Actually the muddy water is too thick and we don’t want to get our armor all dirty.

Frog: You could jump.

Druid: No… that would be like… a thirty foot jump.

Frog: Then I don’t know what else to tell you.

Druid (ooc): Wow that was unhelpful, I punt the frog across the lake.

DM: Wow okay, change your alignment to ABSOLUTE evil.

Tag your class: seeing a cockroach in your room
  • Knight: Grabs any shoe that's close to kill it
  • Tank: Stomps it immediately with your foot
  • Archer: Throws whatever object is close to you at it in hopes of killing the little intruder
  • Summoner: Screams for help so someone comes and kill it for you
  • Mage: Uses bug spray to kill it
  • Healer: Uses any net, magazine, glass or whatever object to let the pest outside your house
  • Thief: Leaves the room immediately
  • Dark Mage: Lets the cockroach roam freely before it dies because you fumigated beforehand
  • Bard: Screeches in fear hoping the cockroach just goes away

Bard: It’s not stealing if it’s for good.

Paladin: Okay, before we move on, this is a rare chance to get a moral lesson. Yes, this is stealing. But the world is not black and white. There is grey and this is one of those grey area -

Druid (Interrupting): I’m with Bard, we’re stealing the baby.

anonymous asked:

Ever played D&D RPGs? There's an alignment system for characters that's basically a giude for each char's morals and ethics, and I think I remember you using the term Chaotic Evil once? So I just wanted to hear yuor take on some of the Bleach chars on the alignment chart, thanks!

FKSGHFSDGH YASSS ANON, WHAT A GREAT ASK

I have played D&D, yes! For those who don’t know what the alignment system is, the anon summed it up pretty succinctly.  There are 9 alignments total, with two spectrums ranging from Lawful to Chaotic and Evil to Good.  

I made a chart with a few examples for kicks, and added the rest below the cut.  In the more detailed list, I include different versions for characters who went through an alignment shift.  Either way, most characters won’t fit an alignment perfectly, so I went with what I think is their most dominant one and included their tendencies as well.

You’re probably not going to agree with some of those, but where would be the fun in that anyway? ;) Feel free to offer suggestions/corrections!

(more characters under the cut)

Keep reading

An Unconventional Alignment

Context: The Lost Mines of Phandelver Starter Set, just after the Sleeping Giant tap house battle with the Redbrand Ruffians.  Playing D&D with my little brother and father.  My dad’s character’s alignment is Lawful Good.

Dad: “I decapitate the two dead ruffians, tie their hair together, and drag the living one in front of the Redbrand hideout.  I throw the heads into the burned-out ruins of the manor and bellow, ‘This is what happens when you mess with adventurers!  If you want the same fate, meet us as The Stonehill Inn!’  And I thrust my greatsword through the captive ruffian’s back, and it explodes out the other side of him.“ 

Me, the DM: "What is your moral alignment again?" 

Dad: "My alignment is Fucking Pissed!”

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