roy retirement

Good Stuff(?) - The Emoji Movie

WARNING: Flax seeds can be a great absorbent. Thank you, take care out there, prey for me, and enjoy.

The Emoji Movie? More like… the No See Movie! HA HA HA HA HA HA

Whew, best one yet. Okay, (*Cracks open a cold one*) so. I know this movie looks cheap. It’s from Sony Animation, so you know the effort put into making this a good animated film is Fyre Festival levels of fucked. And I know it’s a millennial satirizing knock off of the following:

  • Sausage Party
  • The Lego Movie
  • Wreck-It Ralph
  • Harry Potter
  • Toy Story
  • A majority of Pixar’s movies
  • Life is Strange (unfortunate)
  • Foodfight! (also unfortunate)
  • Barnyard
  • Smurfs: The Lost Village
  • Rubik: The Amazing Rubix Cube
  • Rachet and Clank: The Movie
  • Fairy Odd Parents: Channel Chasers
  • Fairy Odd Parents: Internet Stupor Highway
  • Avatar: The Last Airbender
  • The Mr. Men & Little Misses
  • The Brave Little Toaster
  • Spongebob 2: Sponge Out of Water
  • Tinker Bell 
  • Most Shonen animes

and so on, but you all know this. However, I see to share a bit of optimism towards this film as good as shamelessly possible. Because after that serviceable disappointment that was Smurfs: The Lost Village and the fact that 2017 has not much better in store this summer, in terms of animation, I just want to give Sony just one. Just a SINGLE glimmer of belief that they can pull something off better than previously. Or maybe, they’re a lost cause; who knows. Now, it’s time to defend this, for the sake of animated movies of all caliber.

BEST CASE SCENARIO: CREEPYPASTA MATERIAL

For once, the movie doesn’t look that bad. It looks colorful, the human designs look pretty good, and the gimmicks in the phone world look pretty creative. It doesn’t look as spastic as Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs or unnecessarily cartoony like Hotel Transylvania. It’s on par with their latest Smurfs movie, and I say that’s a good thing. The only setback are the emojis themselves. Most of them looks inhuman and this is what I consider the “hand effect”, where it’s like trying to animate your own hands to move like a human except you keep the muscle and bone structure of a typical human hand. When it comes to animating living characters, you should always either give the characters a humanoid stature with limbs or make them limbless shapes like with Angry Birds or Veggietales. And with this having the “hand effect”, this limits creativity in movement and it looks weird, jarring, or creepy to try making them act human with 3D animation. Then again, if a no neck design worked well with Crash Bandicoot, it can do well here too.

And on this day, I will forever feel guilty for making such a comparison

Secondly, and this is a small note: what competition does it have? I mean… Atomic Blonde? War for the Planet of the Apes? The Dark Tower? Another Al Gore movie? Jessica Williams? The movies surrounding this ranges from pretty risque for kids to who’s checking this. This flic is known more to a familial audience, so if it actually does good, the adult reviewers can feel more comfortable in recommending this to kids, giving it some merit towards a demographic, like most family films. And then any adult can enjoy it ironically because we’ll feel better knowing it was basically never for us. I’m not saying the hopes for success are high, but like the previous Sony asspulls, it’ll be passable to a particular group. And if not this, then what? Nut Job 2?

Originally posted by giantmonster

I’m serious. Nut Job 2? Anybody want to see that?
Does anybody know about that?

Other than those things, I got nothing. Except for the 107 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD SEE THE EGOJI MOVIE! That’s right. Thanks to a man named Jack Douglass, I have more than enough evidence to convince YOU why it can be a film that can titillate your sense of entertainment and leave you well pleased. And with the help of King Crimson, this list will be most accurate and foolproof plan I have come up with on this site in forever, so here it is:

107 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD SEE THE EMOJI MOVIE!

NUMBER ONE: T.J. Miller and Sir Patrick Stewart are pretty great actors and comedians, and to support their acting in the film can keep their streak of surprising choices for their craft solid.
NUMBER TWO:

and THAT was 107 reasons why you should see the Emoji Movie.

I admit, that is a lot to read, but it’s worth it. Trust me In any case, beyond all those reasons, I can’t say this movie is truly a must-see of the year, like Cars 3 or Captain Underpants, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth seeing at all. I mean, it could’ve been Ice Age 6, which I am certain will come out not long after 2021 or ‘22. I say it’s worth checking out to see what the fuss is about. It’s not controversial like the Ghostbusters reboot or surprisingly good like Baby Driver and 21 and 22 Jump Street, I can assure you, but it could be entertaining in some way nonetheless. I’ll say buy $5 cheap seats at least, don’t want the industry earning that money too easily. And it’s safe to say this movie was gonna be made eventually, so why not give a full look before putting it up on the fridge with all the other drawings? I mean, we already got Emoji merch, pillows, World Emoji Day, Emoji reviews, an Emojipedia, an Emoji Store, and this movie was the Buzzfeed effect that tipped the scale to say “Ya know. This has gone too far”? All in all, Sony may have done itself in with its marketing, but I find the Emoji Movie to possibly be a simple, nonsensical, time wasting film for the summer and a flic you and your buddies can get high to, like most other toy based productions that isn’t the Lego Movie.

I give Wreck-It Ralph a 4 out of 5

A couple big hiccups here and there, but it’s an otherwise solid video game movie

adrearner  asked:

Okay, I have this issue on my mind right now. Like, I really really love Roy and Riza. They are both very complicated characters. And I think my issue actually emerges from that. I've read your meta about Roy purposely choosing his words during the funeral. And then my overthinking and Roy's obvious acting skills came up and I'm thinking "Then what if all his 'caring about his subordinates' is simply a facade too to have them by his side and help him be on the top?" Like, is that possible?

No.

Implying Roy doesn’t truly care for his men would be a fundamental misunderstanding of his character, to the point that not even matters of interpretation could make up for. It absolutely ignores Roy’s core traits and main motivators. Let’s not twist the meaning behind his act. The entire reason Roy wants to become Fuhrer and be “on top” is to protect those below him because that is the one good thing he did in the battlefield. He wants power not for self-serving purposes, but to overturn a system that hurts its people. Showing care for his subordinates is something he explicitly learns to do after Ishval, after he reflects on the fact that he didn’t even know the names of the men under his command who are thanking him for their lives (this is the one scene I’m upset Brotherhood didn’t include, because it’s a key moment for Roy’s character development.) 

Now yes, this is quite naive - but again, everyone who knows him well think him naive. And this is something he pays a price for countless times, as his mindset has unfortunate side effects. Roy keeps endangering everyone he holds dear as he’s forced to treat them as assets, while at the same time vowing to protect them. This dilemma is shown best when Havoc’s injuries from their battle against Lust force him to retire. Roy is feeling upset and guilty of bringing harm to someone he cares for and should be protecting, and doesn’t want to give up on Havoc. It’s Havoc who feels he’s now useless as an asset and begs Roy to see it this way.

Bottom line is, Roy doesn’t want power for its own sake. He wanted Flame Alchemy so he could serve his country and its people. He wants to rule because only then he could ensure the entire country is under his protection. Roy is a genuinely caring human being, and this starts with his subordinates. He might not be buddy-buddy with all of them, but he takes his goal to protect them quite seriously. So I’d hate to be the reason people infer Roy is an unfeeling, ruthless person, or for anyone to believe I see him that way. If he chose his words carefully at Berthold’s funeral (key word: if) it was because he was too naive and goal-focused to understand the harm being done.

Pro athletes react to death of former Toronto Blue Jays pitcher Roy Halladay

Former Toronto Blue Jays star pitcher Roy Halladay died after his plane crashed in the Gulf of Mexico on Tuesday afternoon. He was 40.

The Denver native played 12 seasons in Toronto before being traded to the Philadelphia Phillies in late 2009. He played four more seasons in Philadelphia before signing a ceremonial one-day contract to retire with the Blue Jays in late 2013.

Fellow baseball players and other professional athletes quickly took to social media to express their grief and share their condolences after the sheriff’s department in Pasco County, Fla., confirmed that Halladay’s body was found at the scene of the crash.

“One of the best to ever do it. I had a front row seat to watch his greatness. RIP Doc. (prayer emoji) to Brandy and the kids.” - Retired Major League Baseball outfielder Vernon Wells, who played with Halladay for a decade on the Blue Jays

“My God I can’t believe this news!! Rest In Peace Doc Halladay! I’m honored to have played with you my friend! My family is so heart broken!! Doc Halladay the Ultimate Warrior the hardest working teammate ever! I’m blessed to have spent time training with you!! #Trueleader” - Baseball Hall of Famer Frank Thomas, who played two seasons with Halladay on the Blue Jays

“Saddened to learn about the passing of Roy Halladay. Rest In Peace” - Baseball Hall of Famer Roberto Alomar, who played second base for the World Series champion Toronto Blue Jays in 1992 and 1993

“Sad news, so sorry to hear about the passing of my great teammate #RoyHalladay. My heart goes to out to his family and friends #RIP @BlueJays" - former Toronto slugger Carlos Delgado

"One of the classiest competitors and awesome person. You will be missed ‘Doc’.” Former Toronto Blue Jays first baseman Joe Carter

“My heart hurts writing this. I can still remember the first day we met. It was 5:45am on the first day of spring training when I arrived. He was finishing his breakfast but his clothes were soaking wet. I asked if it was raining when he got in. He laughed and said 'No I just finished my workout.’ I knew right then - he was the real deal. Thank you Roy for allowing us to witness what it takes to be the best. We will all miss you.” - Los Angeles Dodgers second baseman Chase Utley, who played four seasons with Halladay in Philadelphia

“Heart is broken to hear about Roy Halladay, great friend, teammate, father and husband. One of the best teammates ever! You will be missed!” - Retired MLB pitcher Roy Oswalt, who played two seasons with Halladay in Philadelphia

“Gone too soon my friend!!! Blessed to have shared the field with you as a teammate, competitor, friend and more importantly a brother. Praying for Brandy, Ryan and Brayden” - Retired MLB outfielder Shane Victorino, who played three seasons with Halladay in Philadelphia

“Devastated by the tragic loss of Roy Halladay. Best, most consistent pitcher ever. Tremendous teammate. Loving father. Great person. Prayers” - Retired MLB outfielder Raul Ibanez, who played two seasons with Halladay in Philadelphia

“I’m stunned to silence over the news of Roy Halladay. My thoughts and heart are with Brandy and the boys. Rest In Peace my friend.” - Phillies executive Charlie Manuel, who managed Halladay for four seasons in Philadelphia

“We were together in this journey as Canadian Baseball Hall of Famers, now you are gone. RIP Roy Halladay.” - Retired MLB outfielder Vladimir Guerrero, who was inducted into the Canadian Baseball Hall of Fame with Halladay on June 24

“I only own like 5 signed jerseys, and I was so scared to ask him. He wrote that he liked watching ME pitch. What an honor” - Retired MLB pitcher Dan Haren, who posted a photo of the autographed Blue Jays jersey

“Oh my god man. Day ruined. Wow. Prayers with the entire Halladay family. This is awful!” - Blue Jays pitcher Marcus Stroman, who also tweeted #RIPDocHalladay

“RIP Roy 'DOC’ Halladay” - Blue Jays pitcher Aaron Sanchez

“Roy Halladay touched the lives of countless Canadian youth. Rest In Peace, Doc. Your legacy will live on forever.” - official Twitter of the Jays Care Foundation

“So sad to see this news. RIP. Great person, great teammate and human being, my condolences goes out to the Halladay family.” - Cleveland Indians designated hitter Edwin Encarnacion, who posted a photo of Halladay on his Instagram account with the message. Encarnacion and Halladay played half a season together in Toronto.

“Some of you have no idea what Roy Halladay meant to the careers of so many of the up & coming stars. Phone calls. Group talks etc. RIP Doc” - Detroit Tigers pitcher Daniel Norris, who began his career with the Blue Jays

“Roy Halladay was your favorite player’s favorite player. A true ace and a wonderful person. Heartbroken for those who knew him best.” - Los Angeles Dodgers pitcher Brandon McCarthy

“That’s sad. He was huge here in Toronto over the years. I used to keep up with him all the time, watch him pitch. A great pitcher … I just know how much he meant to the city, just inducted to the Canadian (Baseball) Hall of Fame. It’s just way too soon,” Toronto Raptors head coach Dwane Casey. The Raptors held a moment of silence for Halladay before their game against the Chicago Bulls on Tuesday night

“It sucks. It sucks to go out like that. Period. It’s definitely sad new. Prayers and everything go out to his family.” - Raptors guard DeMar DeRozan

“In shock over the terrible news about Roy Halladay… a pitcher I grew up admiring & rooting for. Praying for his family & friends. #RIPDoc” - Los Angeles Angels outfielder Mike Trout

“Rest In Peace Roy Halladay, you will never be forgotten. Your legacy will Live on! #Legend #RIPRoyHalladay” - Retired National Hockey League forward Jeremy Roenick

“Growing up watching #32 take the mound every 5 days for the @BlueJays was a pleasure. He was an athlete I idolized. RIP Doc” - San Jose Sharks forward Logan Couture

“RIP Roy Halladay.. a Toronto legend! Growing up I used to love watching Doc play, sad day for Toronto sports fans” - Cleveland Cavaliers forward and Toronto native Tristan Thompson

“RIP to Roy Halladay. When I played baseball, I always wanted to pitch like 'Doc’.” - Minnesota Timberwolves forward Karl-Anthony Towns

“Very sad to hear of the passing of Roy Halladay. My favourite pitcher growing up watching the jays. Thoughts and prayers with his family. RIP” - Philadelphia Flyers forward Scott Laughton

The Canadian Press

call to arms

A certain Colonel and a particular Lieutenant have gone too long without being in one another’s arms.

This started out as angsty but quickly spun into a very large ball of fluff and I have no shame

Keep reading

rizahawkstang  asked:

AU where Roy kills Envy and Riza doesn't stop him or anything and he becomes führer anyway

OH SHOOT

BUT THE IMPLICATIONS BEHIND THIS

Maybe Envy caused a cave in and trapped everyone except for himself and Roy and Roy kills him. There’s no way he would’ve pulled away if only Scar and Ed had talked him down. I also don’t think there’s any way that Riza wouldn’t talk him down if she was there. 

SCENARIO ONE:

All the events of the Promised Day play out as normal and Riza doesn’t find out that Roy killed Envy till they’re in the hospital together later. After Roy is healed and they both get out of the hospital, Riza immediately requests a transfer. It kills her to do it but she refuses to work under a man who uses the power she gave him to do such terrible things. She knows that if she stayed under his command she’d be forced to fulfill the promise she made to shoot him if he ever strayed from his path. She can’t bring herself to do it, so she breaks off all contact with Roy (quite difficultly, I might add, because those two oh gosh). 

Years later Grumman has died and Roy is the Fuhrer, and Riza starts recognizing violent tendencies in Roy. Anytime he’s in the field he takes the be-all end-all approach instead of democracy and peace. He thinks with his fingers instead of his heart. This is when Riza knows she has to fulfill that promise, even though she knows it will ultimately be her end. She and Roy have become enemies over the years and everyone knows it. 

At a press conference right before Roy takes the podium, Riza disguises herself as one of the members of Roy’s security detail and stands right behind him backstage. Knowing he knows she’s there, she presses a gun to his back, in a perfect position to hit his heart. “Ah,” Roy says. “So you’ve finally come to finish the job.”

“I’m sorry, sir. This hell you’ve created is not one I can follow you into.”

And she pulls the trigger. 

Roy dies immediately, and Riza then turns the gun on herself and takes her own life. She follows him into hell after all, just not the one he constructed with his reign as Fuhrer.

SCENARIO TWO:

Same deal, Riza finds out about Roy’s actions in the hospital afterwards. When they get out, Riza goes missing. Roy goes frantic with worry, because she’s nowhere to be found in Central or East City. He takes time off work as soon as he can and goes back to Riza’s hometown to look for her. Upon returning to her house, which is falling apart and abandoned, he finds her. Sleeping in her old bed. Except she’s not sleeping. Roy later finds out that she took her own life by combining some poisons she had found in her father’s study. He also finds a letter that she wrote, explaining that after everything, she couldn’t bear to live with herself. She knew that there was no hope that flame alchemists could control themselves if Roy couldn’t. She knew she needed to remove all traces of flame alchemy from the world that she could. The letter is signed with her name- her first name- and a post script: Looks like I won’t be following you into hell after all.

After the funeral. Roy retires from the military. Grumman is Fuhrer, and that’s enough for him. Roy refuses to climb any higher without Riza at his side, and he stops using alchemy- all kinds. He sinks into a depression and moves to the North, much like he did in Conqueror of Shamballa. He dies of grief a few years later.


oh wow i made myself sad