More Caine thoughts

The second time I watched Jupiter Ascending I brought my parents. They loved it. On the way out of the theatre my mom and I were chuckling over how Caine, who is supposedly a runt, is played by the not-at-all-a-runt-in-any-way Channing Tatum, and my mom said:

“But runts always grow up to be bigger and stronger than everyone else!”

Since then I’ve seen many posts about how Caine really is a runt and regular lycantants are these huge, 7-10 feet tall beasts but


My mom’s comment stuck with me, and has led me to the exact opposite opinion.

Consider Kalique’s reaction to Caine when he “battle-parkours shirtless into her house and holds her at gunpoint” (not my words). She says: “Well made, by the look of him.”

Considering Kalique employs a lot of splices and is thousands of years old I’m gonna trust her word on this.

However Caine came into the world, I think he grew up just fine. Better than fine. Consider he’s had to make his way as a lone-wolf for years and he didn’t just survive: he was a Skyjacker, a “legend in the legion” as Ibis states. He didn’t just survive; he thrived. Until the whole ripping-out-entitled throats happened which is another matter entirely.

Which is just how any self-respecting narrative about a runt should go. Of course the tiny, half-albino blond runt grows up twice as big and strong as the rest and proves himself. And it is exactly the kind of narrative which fits with the overall tone of Jupiter Ascending.

In my head, Caine is actually rather large for a lycantant, and there are not, in fact, many lycantants in the Legion. Lycantants are made and kept sort of like hunting dogs. Maybe they are mostly used for private security, or even civilian uses like herding space!cattle or whatever.

None of the space!ranches/mansions wanted a runt on their crew, but the Legion is like “yeah sure whatevs at least he’ll be cannon fodder” which is how his splicer “sold him at a loss” (according to Stinger).


Except then he grew up. And he wasn’t cannon fodder—oh no! He was out there working twice as hard to prove himself, and his commanders are like “fuck let’s try, you know, feeding him and shit and holy cow he just did [insert crazy amazing stunt here] hey Skyjackers we got someone for you…”

Of course, even though he’s big and strong now, he’s still goes by the Steve Rogers school of fighting. In other words: he fights like a girl. Because Caine learned to fight before his growth spurt kicked in. That’s why all the grace and flip-kicks and knowing how to fight a dude who’s bigger than you (see: him vs. Greeghan). Only now he’s got that kind of skill in a not-insubstantial body and he is a. fucking. beast.

And the irony is, before things went tits up with the attack, there were a number of royals who were eyeballing Caine’s contract like “heeeeeey maybe we actually want you to come lead our pack” but then biting happened and…


Not saying the “Caine is really a runt and lycantants are huge” theory is without merit. It definitely has merit. (It has, after all, led to the creation of Ylva Dhole.) This is just the one that stuck in my head, and it is the one I’m working from while writing HTTYAWBF. Though it may not be explicitly shown, everything this experience implies has had an effect on the way I write Caine, so its influence will be at least implicitly felt.

It may or may not also have a major impact on the plot of my ENTIRELY HYPOTHETICAL NOT MAKING ANY PROMISES Stinger/Caine Legion Days prequel.

Just sayin’.


Picture 1

Bonnie & Clyde flask

Hands on a Hardbody air freshener

Wonderland cup

Natasha Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812 egg shakers

Newsies BCEFA magnet

How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying Magnet

Bonnie & Clyde Magnet

Soul Doctor Magnet

Normal Heart Magnet

Peter and the Starcatcher magnet

Drowsy Chaperone Magnet

Ann button

Little Mermaid button

Normal Heart stress heart

West Side Story keychain

Wonderland pin

Big Fish pin

Spring Awakening light up pen

Taboo playing cards

Ghost keychain

Fiddler on the Roof pin

Bengal Tiger at the Baghdad Zoo pin

Million Dollar Quartet button

Hair pin

Shrek Daniel Breaker as Donkey button

High School Musical button set

Well button

Picture 2

Beautiful Cast signed Playbill

Mystery of Edwin Drood Closing Cast Signed Playbill

Next to Normal OBC Playbill

Spring Awakening Non-Equity Tour Signed Playbill

On An Average Day West End Programme Signed by Woody Harrelson and Kyle MacLachlan

Newsies Opening Night Playbill

Newsies Cast Signed Playbill with Jeremy Jordan

Heathers Playbill Signed by Cait Fairbanks

Pippin Playbill signed by Patina Miller

Pippin Playbill Signed by Ciara Renee, John Rubenstein, Priscilla Lopez, Rachel Bay Jones, Erik Altemus, and others

Kinky Boots CD booklet signed by Annaleigh Ashford

Once Playbill signed by Paul Nolan

Nice Work If You Can Get It Playbill signed by Jessie Mueller and Blythe Danner

Motown Playbill signed by Cast

Picture 3

Everyday Rapture Playbill signed by Lindsay Mendez

Ghost Non Equity tour Cast Signed Playbill

If/Then Playbill signed by Jackie Burns, James Snyder, and LaChanze

Mary Poppins Cast Signed Playbill with Maddie Trumble

Mandy Gonzalez signed Wicked Production shot

Rondi Reed signed phoo

Arthur Darbvill signed photo

Jonathan Freeman as Jafar signed photo

Bonnie & Clyde Wanted Poster

Les Miserables playbill signed by Betsy Morgan

Nathaniel Hackmann signed Jean Valjean u/s slip signed

Spelling Bee photo signed by Jesse Tyler Fergusen and 1 other.

Picture 4

Taboo stickers

Grease flyer

Catch Me If You Can flyer

Spring Awakening flyer

Bare flyer

Last 5 Years flyer

Spamalot opening night photo frame

Laura Osnes signed headshot

Rocky Horror postcard

Spelling Bee production shot

Lion King signed production shot

Pippin postcard from Cast album recording

Hairspray playbill card signe dby Dick Latessa

Picture 5

Jersey Boys Squigs drawing

Bullets Over Broadway souvenir program

Felicia Finley signed CD

Alice Ripley CD

Matilda u/s slip signed by Ben Thompson

Matilda u/s slip signed by Sean Montgomery

Spider-man Turn Off the Dark u/s slip signed by Jason Gotay

Once u/s slip signed by Ben Hope

Once u/s slip signed by Erikka Walsh

Bare u/s slip sligned by Alex Wyse

Big Fish u/s slip signed by Ben Crawford

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Newsies u/s slips

Cast sheet from Opening Night

Cast Sheet from May 24th 2014 Evening- Jp as Iain, Jack as Clay, Julian as Aaron, Jeremy Greenbaum as Davey w/ bio and headshot

Cailtyn as Julie

Julian as Ryan Steele

Hogan Fulton as Romeo (headshot & bio)

Michael McArthur as Corey Hammerston (Papermill)

Ryan Breslin as Davey

Fatica as Breslin

Caitlyn as Laurie

Mike Faist as Jack Kelly

Fatica as Tommy

Julian as Faist

Laurie as Katherine

Jack as Evan

Fatica as Faist

Jack as Garett

JP as Buttons (headshot & bio)

Picture 7

Jekyll & Hyde souvenir program

Sister Act souvenir program

Hair souvenir program

Playbill Yearbook vol. 2

Cinderella Souvenir program

Newsies book

Wicked Pop-up book

Justin Clynes signed headshot

Wicked souvenir pogram insert with Megan Hilty & Eden Espinosa

Les Miserables coffee table book From Stage to Screen

Rent coffee table book

Slava’s Snowshow souvenir program

Mamma Mia souvenir program

Picture 8

West Side Story t-shirt Size XL

Hair Summer of Love t-shirt size XL

Playbill tshirt size XL

Godspell Black t-shirt size XL

Godspell Red tshirt size 2xl

Oklahoma tank top size ladies medium

Tick tick boom ladies baby doll shirt size m

Dreamgirls tshirt sized 2XL

Hairspray tshirt size 2xl

Picture 9

Ursula Little mermaid tshirt size Ladies L

Rent Long Sleeve Shirt (No day but today on back) size XL

Soul Doctor Birthriht shirt Size L

Real Live Boy shirt from Shrek Size 2XL

anonymous asked:

If modern music was in middle earth I imagine that Lothlorien would make classic music, rivendell would make popmusic and Mirkwood would make indie music

Lothlorien, close…very close. It’s all the way in Aman, at Valinor, where they make the fancy classical music. Harps, cellos, they’ve got it all. Specifically, it’s Alqualondë with the soft relaxing music, and it’s Tirion with the more uppity stick-up-their-ass more recognized classical music.

Lothlórien has a different kinda music. They have the stoned music. You know what stoners listen to when they get high? That slow lazy beat? That’s Lórien for you. Occasionally they have a bit of a funky beat, where they have some sick beats. Galadriel is the original #trapqueen.

Rivendell has the catchy af beat. you have too, when you have a cool dad/ruler like rondy-o. It’s mostly because of Maglor, though. Maglor was the first guy to develop rap. Elros was always a better rapper than Elrond, but Elrond’s glad to see that Elladan and Elrohir have their uncle’s innate rap ability.

Mirkwood, man. With a ruler like that, everything’s gonna be indie. No mainstream in Thrandy’s kingdom. Everything has to be shallow-deep and have some meaningful lyrics. And what’s a song without a drum solo? Thranduil doesn’t know. Thranduil’s never had a song WITHOUT a drum solo. Fuck your drum solo-less songs.


what is this now i’m doing fanart for my own Jupiter Ascending fanfiction.

someone take my pencil away.

first two are scenes from chapters 1 and 2 respectively. third one is just a silly extra.

said fic is here if you’re into that sort of thing. also tagging all my related posts with “how to train your angel-wolf-boyfriend” if you want to follow my anguished writing posts.

EDIT: for some reason tumblr doesn’t like my “how to train your angel-wolf-boyfriend” tag, but since I also tag these posts with “rondie writes fanfic” you can follow that one, too.


For trade/sale. Message me if you are interested in anything!

Picture 1

All the Way Pride Playbill signed by Bryan Cranston

If/Then Playbill signed by James Snyder, Jenn Colella, Ryann Redmond, Janet Krupin and Jason Tam

Mary Poppins playbill signed by the cast

Mamma Mia playbill signed by Laurie Veldheer and others

Shrek the Musical Tour playbill signed by Haven Burton

Book of Mormon tour playbill signed by Gavin Creel and others

Seminar Playbill signed by Alan Rickman, Lily Rabe, Jerry O’Connell, Hamish Linklater, and Hettienne Park

Nathaniel Hackmann signed Les Mis Jean Valjean understudy slip

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time playbill signed by Alex Sharp and one other

Spirit Control playbill signed by Jeremy Sisto and others

Aladdin Playbill signed by Adam Jacobs, and a couple of others

Hairpsray Playbill signed by Kate Loprest

If/Then playbill signed by Jackie Burns, LaChanze, and James Snyder

Jekyll & Hyde Playbill signed by Robert Cuccioli, Christianne Noll, and Lubra Mason

The Rink signed by Chita Rivera

Picture 2

Singin’ In the Rain Playbill signed by the cast

Hedwig and the Angry Inch Playbill signed by Lena Hall

The Book of Mormon Tour playbill signed by the cast

Ghost National Tour Playbill signed by the cast

Kinky Boots Cd insert signed by Annaleigh Ashford

Spelling Bee photo signed by Jesse Tyler Fergusen, and Sarah Sultzberg

Mystery of Edwin Drood signed by Janine DiVita

After Midnight Signed by babyface

Rock of Ages Pride Playbill signed by Carrie St. Louis, Aaron C. FInley, and more!

American idiot tour signed playbill

Jonathan Freeman signed Jafar photo

Arthur Darvill signed Doctor Who photo

Mystery of Edwin Drood signed by Justin Greer

Motown Playbill signed by the cast

Once Playbill signed by Paul Nolan

A Civil War Christmas signed by Alice Ripley

Lion King signed production shot

Charissa Hogeland signed Veronica slip Heathers the Musical

Picture 3

Bonnie & Clyde Wanted Poster

Bullets Over Broadway souvenir program

Nikki M James signed headshot

Laura Bell Bundy signed photo

Sister Act program

Pippin Playbill signed by many of the original company including Patina Miller, Matthew James Thomas, Terrence Mann, and Rachel Bay Jones among others

Godspell Playbill signed by Lindsay Mendez, Anna Maria Perez de Tagle, and Morgan James

Newsies Trading Cards (Ephraim Sykes (x2), Jess LeProtto, Andy Richardson, Ryan Breslin, Jeremy Jordan, Evan Kasprzak (Signed), Brendan Stimson, Ben Fankhauser, Garett Hawe, Kyle Coffman, and Michael Fatica)

Newsies closing night gift paper machete vase made with the newspapers from the show

Picture 4

Laura Osnes signed headshot (has creases and damage)

Rondi Reed signed photo

Spamalot opening night frame

 Alice Ripley CD brand new

On an Average Day programme signed by Kyle MacLaughlin and Woody Harrelson

Hairspray playbill trading card signed Dick Latessa

Felicia Finley signed CD

Phantom of the Opera 25th Anniversary Playbill

Hairspray Closing Night Playbill

Wicked 10th anniversary playbill

Pippin Post Card given out at the cast recording session

Spelling Bee production shot

Flyers: Catch Me If You Can, Bare, Last 5 Years, Spring Awakening, Grease

Pictures 5-7

One Man, Two Guvnors

How to Succeed in Business without really trying

Million Dollar Quartet

Rock of Ages signed by Dan Domenech, Rebecca Faulkenberry, Michele Mais, and 1 other

Lion King

Beauty and the Beast

Clybourne Park

Rocky Horror Show

A View From the Bridge

Addams Family

Additonal Items not pictured

Alice Ripley signed Next to Normal magnet

Newsies understudy slips (opening night cast sheet, Jack as Evan, Julian as Ryan Steele, Julian as Mike Faist, Michael Fatica as Mike Faist, Caitlyn as Julie, Cailtyn as Laurie, Jack as Garett, Fatica as Breslin, Laurie as Katherine, JP as Buttons (headshot & bio slip), papermill slip Michael McArthur as Corey Humemrston, Fatica as Tommy, Breslin as Davey, Sheet with JP as Iain Jack as Clay Julian as Aaron and Jeremy Greenbaum headshot and bio on the bottom announcing him as Davey

New Things for Trade

- Once BCEFA poster signed by Joanna Christie, Paul Nolan, and 10 others (Must be at least 2 signed playbills to trade, depending upon the playbills)

- Newsies Playbill signed by Corey Cott, Liana Hunt, and many others in the cast

- Ghost Non-Eq Tour signed playbill signed by leads

-Mandy Gonzalez signed 5x7 production shot

Rondi Reed signed 6x8 photo

Newsies full prop newspaper

Newsies closing night gift (glass vase (a candle holder) paper machete with the newspaper from the show)

Everyday Rapture Playbill signed by Lindsay Mendez

Nathaniel Hackman signed U/S Valjean slip