How to ruin something romantic (Naruto families headcanon)

Hinata: … and there we were, in the middle of the battlefield. Then your father took my hand; his was so big and warm…

Boruto: We are still talking about his hand, right mom?

Hinata: Yes, what else would I…? Ahhhhhh!!!! how… how can you say something like that? You’re grounded!!


Sakura: And just when I was about to loose all hope. Your father returned and asked me to travel with him, just as he promised…

Sarada: So you did perverted stuff in the middle of the forest? that’s not really hygienic. I though a doctor would know better.

Sakura: *Punches wall* Don’t you have to train today, honey?


Orochimaru: And these, my son, are all the ninja I used and murdered in my experiments to get the perfect DNA chain you were created from.

Mitsuki: Wow dad, this story is so beautiful… I’m about to cry.

Orochimaru: Its understandable. Look! you have specimen #13 nose… he was my favourite.


Shikamaru: Love is a drag… women are a drag… the chuunin exams are a drag… teenagers are a drag… the ninja system is a drag…

Shikadai: This story is such a drag.

Shikamaru: Don’t you dare say the incredible story of how I fell in love with your mother is a drag… unless I say so.


Inojin: Dad, can you tell me something romactic that happened to you and mom? I need inspiration.

Sai: Well, yesterday she asked me for something different. So I covered myself in soy sauce, lay still on the bed and…

Inojin: Not that!


TenTen: So there I was, surrounded by enemies and with nearly no chakra left in my body. My only weapon, a broken broom. That moment I knew that all those years in a taijutsu team may be the key to get out of that dangerous situtation.

Metal Lee: Mom, this story is really interesting, but I asked you about a romantic moment between you and…

TenTen: I’m raising a man, not a shoujo-manga female lead! Now let’s go back to my awesome adventure.