One White Lie

One White Lie by komodobits
Rating: T
Word Count: 11,200
Summary: Castiel takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. He doesn’t need to run through what he’s going to say – he’s already planned and edited and rehearsed it a thousand times. He is going to ask Dean Winchester out to dinner. If it’s not too forward, he’ll say, perfectly charming. You see, I’ve seen you around the neighbourhood and you always seem so earnest and I’d really like to get to know you bette— The door swings open, and Castiel panics.
He intends to excuse himself. He means to apologise and come back some other time. However, in a moment of blind fear, what comes out of his mouth instead are the words, “Could you spare a moment for Jesus Christ?”


OMFG! This fic was freaking hilarious. Crack pure and simple. Castiel’s inner dialog was a thing of disturbed beauty - the poor man. The things that come out of his mouth are at complete odds with what he really wants to say. And he just keeps digging the hole deeper and deeper. I often laugh and move on with fics like this, but this one just demanded to be shared. Don’t drink and read unless you enjoy spitting across the room!

No matter how long it’s been or how many times I’ve watched it, Will saying the words ‘Did you just smell me?’ in that sort of teasing disbelief that Doctor Lecter just-fucking-sniffed-him plus Hannibal’s genuine awkwardness as he tries in vain to excuse himself, will always make the clouds part, the sun come out, flowers bloom, and put a big goofy grin on my face.

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If The Walking Dead Were A Romantic Comedy

Stages of watching a romantic kdrama...

Stage 1: Seeing the male lead.

Stage 2: When the first leads meet.

Stage 3: When the couple fall in love.

Stage 4: Any time the couple are close to one another.

Romantic Tropes I’m an absolute sucker for:

The slow burn where they both love each other but think the other person doesn’t feel the same way but literally everyone in the world knows how they feel about each other.

They absolutely loathe each other but everyone around them knows that they actually totally love each other.

Royalty/Commoner ESPECIALLY when the commoner didn’t know they were royalty and feel so betrayed when they find out.

I mean really, any version of the Person A is hiding something about their identity for decentish reasons and Person B eventually finds out and is just so betrayed and Person A has some version of the “I didn’t mean for it to happen, but it did. I fell in love with you.” (Chasing Liberty is my favorite, okay?)

Also the “we’re from different worlds” version, too.

And of course Person A is trying to rescue/find/reunite with they significant other and Person B gets enlisted to help but then totally falls in love but thinks Person A really loves sigo, but when they finally are reunited they realize they really love Person B.

FAKE ENGAGEMENT!!!!!!!!

LGBT Movie Reviews: Recap

So, I’ve watched quite a few queer-related movies in the past few weeks. Here’s a recap of the ones I’ve watched (and ones I’m going to watch) and how I’ve rated them.

Blue Is The Warmest Colour: 5/10 Brownie points for Lea Seydoux being Lea Seydoux, but it’s a no-go for the male gaze-oriented sex scenes. And Adele’s snot-crying at the end. And for Emma calling Adele a slut… I love and hate that scene both at the same time. But mainly hate. Also, it’s long and in all French, so you better put on the subtitles and have a good 3 hours to just chill.

High Tension: 7/10 Cecile de France is amazing in this film (read: her haircut is hot), and I’m sad her character had such a bad ending. The gore is slightly over-the-top, but terrific in its execution (so many bad puns. I apologize). Although most of it is in French and dubbed in some places, I would still watch it again in a heartbeat. The suspense and the tension were high (again, I’m sorry, I can’t help it) but the ending does not bode well for LGBT folks. As is such with many films in the horror genre, the concept of sexuality is a misused and abused one.. but it makes for great fanfiction (mine, since it’s one of the only TWO fanfics posted on the internet from this fandom). 

But I’m A Cheerleader: 6/10 Too campy for my taste, but I shipped Megan and Graham from the moment Graham said “I like girls” while staring at Megan. It’s a very good film to watch if you need to distract yourself from the reality of living at the Pray The Gay Away summer camp your parents just sent you to “for your own good.” Also, Natasha Lyonne plays Nicky Nichols in OITNB, so… yeah. Brownie points all around.

Imagine Me & You: 11/10 Yes, I gave it an eleven. (These go to eleven.) I absolutely LOVED this movie. Luce, The Florist, is amazing. Rachel, The Married Woman, is adorable. Heck, The Token Male Character, is… awkward and sweet and a necessary evil for the plot. But the romance! Literally, kids, I’m never watching The Notebook during a sleepover as long as I’ve got this movie. It’s fucking adorable and British and the witty dialogue is on point.

The Runaways: 7.5/10 I didn’t know I shipped KStew and Dakota Fanning until I watched this movie. And the portrayal of Joan Jett was amazing- the old middle-school me that was obsessed with Joan Jett and the Blackhearts (and My Chemical Romance… we all have our punk phases) was amazed at how Joan Kristen was. Even down to their hair-flip thing.  I mean, Kristen should sing more. And wear tighter t-shirts more often, you know what I’m saying?

Better Than Chocolate: 8/10 This movie would be a seven, if I hadn’t loved the trans* character of Judy so much which added a brownie point. It was a cute comedy, and I liked the friendship between Judy and  the mom, Lila. Also, Christina Cox as Kim (girlfriend goals second only to Luce The Florist)… and the sexy painting scene around 20 minutes in… yep. Except for the random scary break-in near the end, this movie was sweet and definitely better than chocolate.

Pending reviews: 

The Kids Are All Right; Lost and Delirious; Bloomington; Loving Annabelle; My Summer of Love; When Night Is Falling; Mulholland Drive; Heavenly Creatures; Bound; Room In Rome; Cracks; Itty Bitty Titty Committee; Martyrs; The Moth Diaries; The Secret Diaries of Miss Anne Lister; Tipping The Velvet; Desert Hearts; Go Fish and Fried Green Tomatoes.

Anyone have any other suggestions? I’ll try and watch Affinity and Fingersmith (or better yet, read them) if I can find any copies of them lying around the library. Sadly, no luck so far.

Consider this my pseudo-”summer reading” assignment, although I can’t buy lesbian-themed books (aside from The Price of Salt that I bought and have hiding in the bottom of my dresser to read at night with the door closed- it’s so good!) or else my mother will find them and ask too many questions. I feel like I smuggled in drugs or something, when I went to buy the book at Barnes and Noble. It was the fastest I’d ever been through a checkout. :)

Awkward, but here it is… The Triple Dab! LOL!!! Hahahahahahaha!! 

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Bo Gum watching himself act… Lol!! His facial expressions are perfection.

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so basically thomas and alex’s past life, they promised each other they would find each other in another life time and now they did like,,,, alex has this ring that thomas gave him and said “in our next life, give me this ring” sO when alex reincarnated and looked for thomas,,, HE FOUND HIM and screamed fuxkinf !!! THOMAS MARRY ME !!! and thomas is like “who are you”