rolls around because this is dumb

the types as bitches i hate in college and also ive had a lot of wine

ESFJ: that social butterfly bitch that doesn’t understand anything ever without asking twelve clarifying questions before you can explain shit, like i was gonna explain that obvious feature of your new iphone in four seconds chris, how about you chill and stop acting like IM the weird one

ISFJ: that boring nice bitch who has probably never had a unique individual thought in their life. they’re like, solely reactionary beings, the true wobbuffets of real life.

ESFP: that crazy bitch whose super weird but everybody likes because theyre just weird enough to be likable but never hangs out with you consistently because theyre too involved with theatre or ecstasy or some shit idk

ISFP: that sarcastic bitch whose somehow still obsessed with fandoms and superwholock and probably owns a horse back home or something

ENFJ: that starry eyed bitch who loves everybody and wants to save the world or some shit, idk, my eyes glazed over a quarter way through your monologue; besides, it all just pans out to you feeling bad about yourself because you can’t live up to the impossible standards you set for yourself anyways so am i really missing anything???

INFJ: that passive aggressive bitch whos always gotta remind you that they’re the most rare mbti type, and act all ethereal and distant and shit when we all know ur a dime a dozen on a college campus anyways

ENFP: that emotionally dead bitch who convinces everybody that theyre not because theyre so enthusiastic and tells you their whole life story the first time you meet them to cause shock and awe but also to get you lowkey emotionally attached

INFP: that sensitive bitch who wants to be a writer or an artist or something but is too obsessed with memes to get very far 

ESTJ: that polysci bitch who runs for class president when everybody knows damn well you don’t do any real anything on campus and the dean regards you with as much contempt as i do

ISTJ: that awkward bitch who knows they’re not that fun so they try really hard to put themselves out there and just makes it awkward and weird for the whole party

ESTP: that loud bitch who gotta be the center of attention all the time and everybody likes for some reason

ISTP: that angry bitch whose a wannabe sociopath and always telling you how much they hate people and want to murder people for, like, literally no reason like calm down edgelord tom.

ENTJ: that problematic bitch who starts shit right at the end of class because success and proving that they know shit is the only thing that makes them feel anything anymore

INTJ: that condescending sarcastic ass bitch that rolls their eyes whenever somebody raises their hand and is probably one dumb question away from bringing a gun to school

ENTP: that annoying bitch who starts arguments in class with everybody because they think its fun or wanna prove they know useless knowledge or logic or some shit idk stanley and idc just stop arguing with the professor its psych 101 and i want to go home

INTP: that quiet bitch who spends the whole party looking around in the corner and asking their friend if they can leave yet and only talks during class to explain something semi useless and tangental to the topic at hand 


I’ve actually had this rolling around in my head for weeks and it was funny when I first thought of it. Sometimes I am self-conscious of my dumb ideas.  

Stop Craptions.

Okay so I’ve made a post about this before but this is just getting ridiculous. Actually, the post I made before regards the same freaking video I’m going to talk about now. This has to do with closed captioning. After my little rant in my other post about how big youtubers like Markiplier and Jacksepticeye have people writing captions for them and inserting stupid jokes and unnecessary commentary, there were edits made to the CC in the video I specifically talked about. A good start, but not revolutionary. 

I went back to watch that video tonight because it’s one of my favourite videos, and the captions have somehow gotten WORSE. Not only is there stupid commentary, but now there’s jokes that are actually offensive. 

(For context, they are doing the Whisper Challenge).

For YEARS people in the Deaf community have been trying to end the stigma/stereotype of deaf = dumb and then this BS rolls around. I’m just.. I’m just so done.

I shouldn’t have to turn the CC off for some of my favourite youtubers simply because they’re obnoxious, distracting, and/or offensive. I shouldn’t have to struggle to understand videos because I had to turn the CC off. So, to those who write captions for youtubers, please do it right oh my god. If you want to add commentary, do so in the comments like you’re supposed to. Otherwise you’re ruining it for a lot of people, and not just in the Deaf community. People who don’t have English as their first language, people with auditory processing disorder, people with ADD, etc. You’re ruining their youtube experience “for the lolz”. 

I just wish youtube had regulations for CC like television does. This shouldn’t be an issue. 

For more information about CC and “craptions”, check out @rikkipoynter​. 

Paper Hearts (Part 13)

Originally posted by tbhobi

Genre: Angst/fluff

♡ Pairing: Reader x Jungkook // Reader x Jimin

♡ Length: 5.1k

♡ Summary: It has been nearly a year since you started writing anonymous letters to Jungkook, giving him words of encouragement behind the thin mask of a paper. He never considered you as a possible suspect behind these letters, because you were nothing more than a best friend. And you couldn’t put all the blame on him either, after all, you were too afraid to confess in fear of tarnishing your precious friendship.

1 ♡ 2  ♡ 3  4   5   6   7   8   9  ♡ 10  ♡ 11  ♡ 12  ♡ 13  ♡ 14

Keep reading


Draco sees fem!reader wearing Harry’s jacket and gets j e a l o us.


Draco clenched his jaw tightly.
You were wearing Potter’s bloody jacket.
He attempted to hold back the natural snarl that was twisting his face, as he watched that little shit look over at you and notice you were shivering from the cold November air before slidding his coat off of himself and onto you.
And then you smiled. And giggled. And thanked him. And nuzzled deeper against the lining.
“Jesus, Draco, you look prepared to kill a man,” Blaise joked from beside him, taking a drink of butterbeer.
“I damn well am considering it,” Draco fumed, tightening his vice like grip on his butterbeer, “Potter just thinks he can do whatever the hell he wants. For fuck’s sake, it’s like he’s claiming her as his. And she’s just okay with it! She’s just walking around with his stupid jacket as if to tell the whole world that Y/N is super close with Potter! It’s sick! I mean, she should’ve just brought another layer! Sharing jackets is so cliché and annoying! It’s like they’re in one of those dumb romance books!”
“You just want Y/N to wear your jacket, huh?” Blaise raised an eyebrow, smugly.
“Shut up,” Draco growled, “No one asked you.”
“So you wouldn’t want to see Y/N swimming in one of your jackets?”
“Yes, of course I would, okay? I’m not insane, that’d be fucking adorable,” he muttered, taking a swig, “But that’s different.”
“It’s only different because it’d be your jacket and not Potter’s?”
Blaise rolled his eyes and chuckled, “Draco, they aren’t dating. They’re just friends. There’s nothing to be jealous about.”
“Jealous? I’m not jealous! I just think Potter’s jacket looks dumb and my jacket would look much cuter on her. The green would bring out her eyes and make her hair more vibrant. Potter’s red jacket just washes her out…”
Blaise just shook his head, “Whatever you say, mate.”

(Next day)

You turned around to see one of your best friends jogging toward you.
“Oh, hey, Draco,” you smiled.
“Hey,” he nodded back.
You waited for whatever it was he had been planning to say when he called your name, but he said nothing else.
“It’s pretty cold out here, huh…” Draco said, eventually, in an awkward, unnatural tone that made you raise an eyebrow.
“Yeah… I suppose…”
“Really?!” Draco’s eyes lit up, “I mean, you can borrow my jacket if you want, I’m really not that cold…” he said, quickly.
“But you just said it was cold…?”
“I said it was cold outside, not that I was cold.”
“Yeah, but if you think it’s cold outside, then you are cold…”
“No, I’m saying it’s objectively cold outside.”
“Yeah, but -”
“Oh, my god, do you want the jacket or not?!” He exclaimed.
You chuckled at his outburst, “You saw Potter give me his jacket yesterday, didn’t you?”
Draco tried to shrug as nonchalantly as he could manage, “… Maybe.”
You laughed and rolled your eyes, “Draco, if you wanted me to wear your jacket, you should’ve just asked. I would’ve happily agreed.”
Draco’s eyes widened as a smile tugged on his face, “Really?”
You smiled back, nodding, “Of course.”
He giddily slipped the green jacket off of his shoulders and carefully onto yours. Then, he slid his fingers against your neck and un tucked your hair. Honestly, he thought you looked cuter with your hair tucked in, but he wanted an excuse to touch your hair.
You nuzzled into the jacket like you had yesterday, except this time it was adorable whereas last time it was infuriating.
You giggled, recognizing Draco’s jealousy, before reaching out and playfully messing up his hair, “Relax, Draco, just because I was wearing his jacket doesn’t mean I’m dating him or anything.”
Draco bit his lip, overjoyed at hearing you say that, but pressing on cheekily, “What if I say that wearing my jacket does mean you’re dating me?”
You raised an eyebrow and stepped closer to him, “Oh, does it now?”
He nodded, “Yup. It’s a rule.”
You took another few steps closer, causing Draco’s breathing to halt. You hummed thoughtfully, “An official rule?”
Draco managed to nod.
You stopped, inches from his face, and bit your lip before whispering, “Then perhaps it’d be better not to break it.”
Draco couldn’t stand it anymore, he closed the distance between you, pulling your laughing lips to his by your waist - the same waist wrapped in his jacket. Your arms found their way upward as your hands held his face, the same arms that were wrapped in his jacket. He loved associating that word to you: his.
You finally pulled apart, laughing contentedly.
“If I may say so,” Draco whispered to you, as you rested your head against his chest, “You do look absolutely beautiful in my jacket.”
“It’s going to be my jacket if you keep encouraging me like this,” you teased.
He grinned wider. Because that was an even better word that he liked associating with: yours.

✰ * º ❛   that 70′s show sentence starters   ❜

‘  you know what your problem is? i’m too good looking.  ’
‘  god, what did you have for breakfast this morning? carnation instant bitch?  ’
‘  oh, is this what we’re gonna do today, we’re gonna fight?  ’
‘  because you’re breaking up the band, yoko!  ’
‘  an apple? where’s my candy, you son of a bitch.  ’
‘  she told me she loves me and then i told her i loved cake…  ’
‘  how’d you’d like to own a little bit of my foot in your ass?  ’
‘  look, if i could run across the beach into my own arms, i would.  ’
‘  you know he never liked phones. he said he could hear voices in ‘em.  ’
‘  when my time comes, i wanna be buried facedown so that anyone who doesn’t like me can kiss my ass.  ’
‘  you know what your problem is? you’re really cute… so no one ever told you to shut your pie hole.  ’
‘  god, we are such the… perfect couple?  ’
‘  you’re cold? well damn, i can’t control the weather!  ’
‘  the gym, or as i like to call it, the institute of things i can’t do.  ’
‘  well, i’d like to help but… not as much as i’d like not to.  ’
‘  don’t put me in your fantasies. i don’t even like being in your real life.  ’
‘  i don’t like people. i like rock n’ roll, sex, and pizza – in that order.  ’
‘  i’m not loving anybody that i’m not legally required to.  ’
‘  and if somebody doesn’t tell me i’m cute in the next five minutes, i’m gonna scream!  ’
‘  don’t hate me because i’m beautiful.  ’
‘  i can’t count on much in this crazy world, but i can always count on you.  ’
‘  i’m going to go out, meet some boys and crush their hearts one by one.  ’
‘  where zen ends, ass kicking begins.  ’
‘  you guys are fighting like cats and whores.  ’
‘  cake is good, but you cannot have sex with cake.  ’
‘  well, my head says no, but my heart says no.  ’
‘  the three true branches of the government are military, corporate, and hollywood.  ’
‘  hey man, if you don’t get caught, everything’s legal.  ’
‘  yeah, but god didn’t see that. i was in my van, and he can’t see through lead.  ’
‘  college is for ugly girls who can’t get modeling contracts.  ’
‘  college is for women who don’t want to marry the first idiot they meet and squeeze out his bastard moron children.  ’
‘  i was never happy. i was just less pissed off.  ’
‘  sometimes when i’m alone, i just love to cuddle.  ’
‘  i have a definite opinion on this… i don’t care.  ’
‘  when he’s unhappy, i know our relationship is in good shape.  ’
‘  all right, sleep tight and don’t let the bedbugs put their foot in your ass.  ’
‘  that’s your brain trying to comprehend its own stupidity.  ’
‘  we have some breaking news: i’m toasted.  ’
‘  but i don’t want to go outside. there are people out there.  ’
‘  oh, please. i’m a hot-looking, smooth-talking, frisky-assed son of a bitch.  ’
‘  no, i’m not pouting. that would upset our routine. god knows i wouldn’t want to move in a new direction and accidentally slip in a puddle of fun or anything.  ’
‘  i’ve just decided being sad is a waste of my time.  ’
‘  he called me ugly on the inside and the outside. i’m sorry, but he’s just wrong about the outside part.  ’
‘  i don’t really cook much. i just plan on getting by on my looks.  ’
‘  no, no, no, you just don’t move on from me. i’m like alcohol. you need a twelve-step program to break my smell.  ’
‘  you know, being here under the stars, sitting on the grass makes me really glad i’m not poor.  ’
‘  the person i love the most is me!  ’
‘  i was voted most popular, best legs, and now godmother? what can’t i do?  ’
‘  why am i alone and all of you less attractive people are happy?  ’
‘  it’s better to have loved and loss than to be butt ugly.  ’
‘  okay, i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: everyone loves me.  ’
‘  why get out of bed when you can read about people who got out of bed?  ’
‘  i got a lot of free time. i mainly use it to nap and cry.  ’
‘  i’ll just curl up in the fetal position and think about pancakes.  ’
‘  have you been in bed all day?  ’
‘  last night i only slept like… nine hours.  ’
‘  i pity you because you’re dumb.  ’
‘  responsible people don’t go around getting their nipples twisted.  ’
‘  they want to kill rock n’ roll because they know it makes us horny, man.  ’
‘  i would love car sex… or just sex… or just a car.  ’
‘  no, i don’t feel bad. i don’t feel anything.  ’
‘  man, think about it. we hold information that could crush the very heart and soul of one of our best friends… i live for days like this!  ’
‘  it’s like we’re too old to trick or treat and too young to die.  ’
‘  talking isn’t gonna help me, okay? what’s gonna help me is, like, drinking.  ’
‘  hey, yeah, that’s the worst idea i’ve ever heard!  ’
‘  i wish i was an octopus.  ’
‘  thanks, but i’ve gotta go to sleep because i have a big day of misery ahead of me.  ’
‘  life is too short to spend it with people who annoy you.  ’
‘  well, for your information, i’m already sorry i was ever born.  ’
‘  i don’t have a hickey. i was using a curling iron.  ’
‘  give me a reason why i shouldn’t set you on fire.  ’
‘  i’m a hottie, you’re a nottie.  ’
‘  prison is not an option for me, okay? i can’t pee in front of other people.  ’
‘  man, time really flies when you take two naps a day.  ’
‘  oh, no. now i have to act normal.  ’
‘  oh, i just remembered i can’t loan it to you on account of i hate you.  ’
‘  i’ve been diagnosed with a disease that makes me irresistible to women.  ’
‘  you know what the best thing god ever did was? boobs.  ’
‘  i’m like ketchup. i go good on everything!  ’
‘  when we were about to fool around and i said that i washed my hands, but i really just got done playing with like six dogs.  ’
‘  there’s a rabbit stuck in a tree and i want to return that rabbit to the wild so it can lay its eggs.  ’
‘  if this is about maturity then i want nothing to do with it.  ’
‘  a wedding without a trampoline? that’s crazy talk.  ’
‘  i don’t wanna blink ‘cause i’m afraid to miss even a second of your cuteness.  ’
‘  you seem normal around your family, but out in the real world, you’re kinda nuts.  ’
‘  i could get arrested. i could go to girl prison. this freakin’ rocks!  ’
‘  my parents are fighting all the time and they want me to choose sides, but i can’t because they’re both idiots.  ’
‘  why would sally sell seashells down by the seashore? i mean, that’s a terrible location for a seashell stand.  ’
‘  i’m not strong, but i know a lot of ways to destroy men emotionally.  ’
‘  i don’t have feelings for him. i just hate that bitch for making him happy.  ’
‘  i’m not jealous, i just want to pop that inflatable bitch and watch her fly around the room.  ’
‘  hello, it is me, the object of your desire.  ’
‘  i’m a beautiful girl with a shrill, demanding voice. i’m pretty hard to ignore.  ’
‘  a gold digger is what these idiots call a woman who knows that love eventually wears off, but money is forever.  ’
‘  you see, a more productive use of my time is revenge.  ’
‘  i cannot be held responsible for the things that come out of my mouth.  ’
‘  i don’t answer stupid questions.  ’

Jake Dillinger Headcanons

-he’s bad at video games
-he always tries to play with Jeremy and Michael and Rich, but just runs off edges or forgets what buttons do what
-sometimes Rich suggests they play on teams just so he can help Jake out and he’ll do bad at something just so Jake can “help” him
-Jake does huge promposals for Rich, huge birthday parties for everyone, always remembers everyone’s anniversary and is the king of giving gifts
-him and Michael have competitions to see who can give better gifts on birthdays
-Michael got him a pin maker once and Jake almost cried
-he makes everyone their own personalized pins including a pin for Rich that just says “taken” in the bi pride colors
-Jake fidgets with everything
-pencils, zippers, hoodie strings, the inside of his pockets
-he plays with Rich’s hands when they hold hands just to keep his fingers busy
-English ? You best believe that’s the subject Jake likes the most. Socratic seminars are his favorite thing because he loves debating things and hearing opinions and wow
-Jake listens to music really, REALLY loud when nobody is home (which is often) and jumps off couches and onto tables and plays the air guitar
-he has this young, loud laugh around his friends and at parties and stuff
-but around his close friends, he has this breathy, short laugh
-he likes dumb pop songs and jams to basically EVERYTHING
-a good 48% of his selfies are furrowed brows with his tongue out and a rock and roll sign
-perfect teeth and health despite primarily eating pizza, chips, little cakes, and Cheetos
-him and Michael get along surprisingly well
-him, Brooke, and Rich have dance parties and Jake laughs at them when they headbang (which is often)
-“I love you guys!!!”, “I love my boyfriend!!!”, “Aren’t my friends the best???”, “Man, you guys are awesome!”
-Jake has so much love for everyone
-Bro! Dude! Man! Sick! Wicked! Sweet! Dang!
-he’s president of like 80 clubs and constantly misses meetings to be at other clubs, but still manages to get everything done
-GSA is the only club he NEVER misses
-he’s always so stressed that he doesn’t even know when he’s stressed because it’s his constant emotion
-validates everyone always
-he loves summer and swimming and going on boats and getting icecream and warm weather
-he calls the squip a squid because he genuinely blocked it all out of his memory and he thinks referring to it like that makes everyone feel a little better (it does)

Warning; idiots in love

Originally posted by jaerins

Everyone had one.

That one person you couldn’t quite put a finger on; not really a friend but not quite anything more or less. There was always that one person in your life that just questions your decisions; just their existence affect you to the core. You, like everyone else had that person. He wasn’t your boyfriend, but you had thought of it sometimes.

He was your friend— well maybe not quite.

You wouldn’t quite call him your friend, maybe an acquaintance would fit the description better?

He was your idea of a perfect man. He was funny—damnit was he funny, and he always had a smile on his face no matter how much the person in front of him pisses him off. He was always in control of any situation given to him. He used to play basketball and when you were younger, you would always pretend as if you were passing by when in reality you knew he would be playing. If he knew, he never pointed it out. He would simply waved and asked you if you wanted to join his friends to eat, because his friends were yours. The two of you were acquaintance.

You first met him in one of your minor classes but you had known him even before that. He was that guy in your university.

The ‘it’ guy.

Christian never understood it, or he never actually tried to.

Keep reading

Prompt from anon. Bughead in assembly and they’re sitting in the back. Betty keeps reading Jughead’s writing over his shoulder until he gets really pissed.

don’t bug me


He doesn’t even turn around, just shakes his head as his pen flies over the notebook spread on his lap.

Betty rolls her eyes and nudges the back of his seat with her knee. “Psst!”

Jughead’s pen stops scratching and he finally looks over his shoulder, his jet black hair falling in a wave over his forehead from under his beanie.

“What?” He hisses, a little too loudly, and he gives a dirty look when someone shushes him from the row in front of him.

“Whatcha writing?” She’s playing dumb because she knows full well what he’s writing but he gets this cute little crease between his eyebrows when they are furrowed in annoyance.

“Leave me alone,” he says without heat before turning back around. She waits until she can see his pen moving furiously over the paper before she taps him on the shoulder.

“Juggie…lemme see,” she whispers, her whole body leaning forward so he’s the only one that can hear her. Everyone else is focused on Mr. Weatherbee’s speech about proper lunchroom etiquette. Betty couldn’t care less and obviously Jughead doesn’t either since she hasn’t seen him look up at the principal once since he’s been on stage. “Juggie…”

“Not a chance,” he mumbles and she rolls her eyes.

“I know it’s your book,” she says, her neck arching to try to catch a peek. “Come on, I won’t tell anyone what you say, I promise.”

“Bets,” he sighs and turns around, his face right in front of hers because she didn’t have time to sit back. His eyes dart down her face and back up again, just once quickly, before they settle onto her own. “No one is reading this until it’s finished.”

“Why?” she whines. “It’s not like I’m in it so why can’t I read a little?”

She watches in curiosity as Jughead’s cheeks darken, a blush creeping over his face as he squirms a little in his seat.

“Juggie, am I in your book?”

He tries to shrug noncommittally but she knows she’s caught him. “Maybe, I dunno. Does it matter?” He’s getting defensive and it’s one thing to rile Jughead up. It’s a whole other ballgame to actually make him angry.

“Sorry, Jughead,” she says when she sees that he’s actually getting upset. “I’ll drop it.”

After the assembly is over, she makes her way to her locker to drop her books before her next class. When she opens her locker door a folded piece of lined paper floats down and lands at her feet.

She’s grinning as she reads his small slanted handwriting on the page.

And even though the girl next door could be pushy and a little annoying, he knew that one day she’d break through his stubborn walls to find the man underneath. In a dark town full of secrets and deceit she was an honest breath of fresh air. A shock of sunshine against a pallor moon. Bright and unyielding gold to counter his somber blue.

Her teeth are digging into her bottom lip by the time she finishes reading. She folds the paper carefully, clutches it to her chest for just a second and tucks it into her history book before closing and locking the door.

Later on at Pop’s, when she slides into the booth next to Jughead and across from Archie and Veronica, she’s wearing a smile so wide she’s afraid she might break her face.

“What’s got you so happy?” Veronica asks with a smirk and Betty reddens when the entire table looks her way.

“Nothing,” she shrugs, her eyes darting over to Jughead. “Just happy, I guess.”

Jughead grins as he pops a fry in his mouth. “Always the little ray of sunshine.”

Archie and Veronica both laugh before going back to their conversation but Betty doesn’t miss the little smile that crosses Jughead’s lips before he digs into his food.

She’s smiling herself as she takes a sip from the milkshake that was waiting for her when she sat down and she knows he was the one to order it. She might be the gold to counter his blue but she doesn’t need to break down his walls to find the man underneath.

Because she can already see him.

Dollar Valentine

Originally posted by fearless-man

Requested by anonymous: did you watched 13 reasons why? bc i would love something like the oh my dollar valentine thing, asking y/n on a date and the date itself

Word Count: 2,847

Note: I didn’t copy it exactly the way they did it in the show, but pretty close ALSO I really went to town and even incorporated some flashbacks that you guys loved so much :) but also I went overboard on this and I do not regret it one bit, plus I know that this was one of the later requests I got, but I just started writing it and couldn’t stop


“Dude, no, I’m not doing that stupid shit.” Shawn shrugs the paper off, rejecting the idea.

Brian looks at him confused, but retracts the paper nonetheless.

“Shawn, you’ve done it every year. Why would this year be any different?” Ian asks, almost just as confused as Brian, if not more.

Shawn bites his lip and pushes a hand through his hair.

“No reason, just don’t feel like it.”

However, there was a reason, and that reason was you. Shawn has had a crush on you since he was ten, literally; you were invited to his tenth birthday party (he had invited the entire class), and the second you walked through the door, he was absolutely convinced that he was in love with you.

Keep reading

fight me

For @snowbaz-feda day 27. Not sure what this was supposed to be but yeah have some more fluff

‘We’ve been together for five years and you still call me ‘moron’ more often than you call me ‘Simon’.’ I fold my arms across my chest and frown at him.

Baz laughs, apparently not realising that I’m actually pissed right now. ‘Old habits die hard, Snow.’

‘Fuck you.’

He stops smiling and looks at me curiously. ‘You’re not seriously mad, are you?’

I huff. ‘How would you feel if your boyfriend constantly told you how dumb he thinks you are?’

He rolls his eyes. ‘You know I don’t mean it like that.’

‘Then how the fuck do you mean it? Should I go around calling you pretentious arsehole and then tell you I don’t mean it?’

Baz frowns and pushes away from the kitchen counter, drawing himself up to his full height. (Those bloody three inches.) ‘Are you picking a fight with me, Snow? Because you won’t win.’

I growl and walk over to him until I’m in his face. (He always knows how to wind me up, and I always fall for it). ‘Why do you always do this?’ I say. ‘You pick on me and piss me off just for the fun of it.’

He rolls his eyes again. ‘Crowley, Snow, calm down. It’s a good thing you can’t go off on me or you would have blown up the flat years ago –’

He stops talking abruptly when I shove him in the chest.

‘Fuck you,’ I say, and I whirl around, planning to stalk off, but something flies out of my jacket pocket and lands on the kitchen floor with a loud ping. We both turn to look at it and I’m already bright red before I see it, because I just know what it is, and fuck, I knew it was a bad idea to carry that stupid ring in my pocket all these months, this was bound to happen –

‘Snow?’ He’s staring at the ring with a look on his face that I can’t read. ‘What is that?’

I rush forward and pick up the ring, stuffing it back in my pocket. ‘Nothing, it’s nothing.’ I shove both hands in my jacket pockets and back away.

He follows me. ‘Why have you got a ring?’

‘I – I don’t – it’s nothing,’ I stammer. Crowley, I’m blushing so much, and honestly, it’s a fucking ring, there’s no excuse for that, there’s no way he doesn’t know why I have it. Because I got it into my head one day when we were out looking at the stars that it would be a good idea to propose and I’ve been carrying it around ever since, but I don’t think I was actually going to do it.

I’m about to turn around and bolt for the door when Baz reaches for my arm.

‘Let me see it,’ he says.

I shake my head, curling my hand around the ring. (Crowley, I’m so embarrassed, why didn’t I just put it in a drawer somewhere?)

‘Forget about it,’ I mumble. ‘Just – it’s not –’

‘Simon, please.’

I take one look at his face and I give in, slowly pulling my hands out of my pockets and showing him the ring. He looks at it, frowning, lips slightly parted, and then he curls his hand around mine, closing my fingers over the ring again.

‘Were you going to…’ He trails off, searching my gaze. I might be imagining it, but his hand seems to be shaking. He takes a deep breath. ‘Simon, if you changed your mind, I get it, but if you haven’t…’

My heart is in my throat. ‘What?’

‘I would have said yes if you asked,’ he says in a tiny voice.

I stop breathing. Seconds pass. ‘What?’

He lets go of my hand. I didn’t think it was possible, but Baz seems to be blushing too.

‘Never mind,’ he says. ‘Fuck. You weren’t going to propose, were you? I mean – you were literally just picking a fight with me and calling me a pretentious arsehole seconds ago – I’m such a twat.’

I laugh and grab his hand. ‘Baz. Baz. Stop. I wasn’t going to ask because I thought you’d say no. Marry me.

He looks back at me, and I think he’s about to cry, and I’m waiting for him to say something ridiculously romantic that will make this moment perfect –

‘Aren’t you supposed to be on one knee?’

I growl at him. ‘Yes or no, Baz?’

He’s definitely crying now. ‘Yes, Simon, of course I’ll marry you. Yes. Crowley.’ I only just manage to slide the ring onto his finger before he’s crashing into me, kissing me over and over again, and it’s messy and we’ve both got tears running down our cheeks and I’ve never seen him smile like that.

I don’t think we’ll ever stop fighting, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.

sassy-molassy  asked:

Reddie prompt: "You only want me when you can't have me". Some angsty shit with a fluffy end. It doesn't matter who these words will belong to, Eddie or Richie, I will be glad anyway if you'll write it.

okay sick done. i hope you like this, it feels like it’s shit but i also kind of love it? idk here u go darling xxx

ao3 link:

warnings: kissing, swearing, mentions of sex i guess?? they’re sixteen yo

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4. Take Care of Me

Request:  Harry is your friend and he’s comforting you because you had a shitty day

Caring H is caring.

“What is it, my girl?” He asks quietly, worried green eyes scanning over your face. His freezing hands cup the sides of your cheeks, his nose red from the brisk autumn wind. From the moment you opened the door he had been all over you; long lean arms encase your waist, kisses pressed into your hair and whispers of concern slip from his lips. It had been a bad day, everything seemed to pile up and though you couldn’t put your finger on one reason, you were just in a sour mood. With your nose tucked inside his thick brown jacket you shake your head. “Just been a rough day, hm?”

“Shitty day,” you correct, you feel his arms slip under your shirt drawing cold shapes into the small of your back “a very hard, shitty day. Just need you to take care of me.” You admit quietly, you feel him nod, removing his hands from your shirt bringing one up to draw your face to his. He’s smile is small, but begins to grow as he speaks. 

“Well then, let’s see what I can do about that.”

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anonymous asked:

Nurseydex + 3am confessions?

This got so fucking long but here I am projecting my own 3am anxiety attacks on my sweet beautiful boy Derek Malik Nurse for your enjoyment.

_/\_  _/\_

It’s Nursey’s first night as a Haus resident and he is painfully aware of how late it is. Dex’s alarm clock sits on the bedside table next to Nursey’s head and reads 2:43am. He has never felt more awake. 

Bits and pieces of unwritten poetry rush through his head too quick for them to stick, a replay of his goodbyes with his moms is on repeat, but his most prominent thought is that no matter how hard he tries he can’t remember if he took his meds before laying down for his laughable attempt at sleep. He tries visualizing everything he did before going to bed - had pie with the other Haus resident, showered, brushed his teeth, put on his pajamas, wrote a new entry in his journal, crawled into bed - but it doesn’t work. Nursey’s memory has checked out for the night while the rest of his body is on high alert. 

Then there’s the hot-headed ginger a few feet above him who he is deathly afraid of waking up. He and Dex have become friends - good friends, even - since they first met. Nursey really didn’t want to ruin the progress they’ve made. The irrational part of his brain is convinced that if he moves too much in his effort to sleep then Dex will start hating him again. Dex will wake up, yell at Nursey, and snap the olive branch they’ve extended towards each other in half. 

And maybe there’s a part of him - a really tiny part - that’s terrified of not being able to see if their friendship evolve into something a little less platonic and a little more romantic because of him screwing it all up. 

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Oh look, another dumb crappy comic! lmao Seto ranting about some shit. Probably involving Yuugi and his friends. This is it. This is the show.

This was way funnier in my head. I had this idea a while back and wanted to scribble it out before I forgot about it again. I have a lot of ideas rolling around in my head, it’s just a matter of digging through them. I’ll need a shovel.

All Yours

Pairing: Simon x Baz 

Words: 1433

Summary: Baz insists that the couple’s nights are spent in the catacombs, Simon lets him. (basically fluff without plot tbh)

Warnings: some swearing, baz is a bit sad,and god awful proof reading (as per usual). if you find anymore warnings you think i should include, please let me know!

A/N: this is my first snowbaz fic that actually made it past the 300 word mark. kinda plotless, but that’s alright i guess. - Skye x


The catacombs were dark. Simon felt the dusty air choke him; no matter how many times he came down here, he always forgot about the dust.

He lit a wall torch, and watched the path light up. The catacombs were like a bad maze, just as soon as you wrapped your mind around them, they seemed to change. Simon knew his way around well enough - not enough not to get lost, but enough.

He didn’t know where Baz would be. Baz liked to keep it secret, to see how long it would take Simon to find him. It used to give him something to do when Simon wandered aimlessly around the catacombs, back before he knew his way around.

With the torch in his hand, Simon began his way down the winding paths. Baz was usually in the same places, even if Simon didn’t know which one, and was easy enough to track down sometimes. Simon hated that Baz made him come down here every night. That they couldn’t just stay in their room.

“Bunce could walk in anytime she wants, Simon.” Baz would argue.

“We can lock the door!”

“You’re even more stupid than you look if you think a locked door will keep out Penelope Bunce.”

And so Simon’s nights consisted of sneaking through the catacombs. All because Baz was scared of Penny walking in on them. Simon liked to moan about it, but the truth was that he’d do anything for Baz. He’d admit to crimes he hadn’t committed before he’d let Baz down.

Simon smiled at the thought of Baz. His sarcastic, snarky Baz. He spent nearly every waking hour with him but it didn’t feel like enough. They had to sneak around, the idea of being out scared both of them. Simon and Baz both knew most people wouldn’t mind, but it wasn’t a risk they wanted to take. Even Penny didn’t know (well, at least Simon hadn’t told her).

In honesty, Simon wasn’t sure when he realised he liked Baz. They’d always been pitted against each other, and it wasn’t until one morning when he saw Baz genuinely smile at him that Simon stopped to wonder how he actually felt about Baz.

And Simon might have been the Chosen One, but the only time he ever cared about being chosen was when Baz chose him.

And Baz might have been a vampire, and a Pitch, and complete pain in the arse, but Simon was always going to choose him.

Because every road Simon took led him back to Baz.


Simon was taking longer than usual, and Baz was bored out his mind.

He always left earlier than Simon - he didn’t like to feed in front of him - but they’d worked it out that if Simon left twenty minutes after Baz, they didn’t need to wait on each other. So either, Simon left later than usual or he was lost. Or maybe he was just taking the piss.

Baz wouldn’t put it past Simon to just be taking the piss. He’d done it before. Left just after Baz and waited outside the door the Catacombs until Baz came back out. Baz knew he was there, of course, he could smell him, and Simon ended up getting the fright after he fell asleep.

“You’re awful at this, Snow.”

“Yeah, I know I am.”

Baz had just laughed, helped Simon to his feet, and walked back with his arm around his shoulders.

They were in their last year at Watford. And even though Baz couldn’t wait to be happy with Simon without having to spend every night in dark and dusty tunnels, he couldn’t help but be a bit sad that this was their last year of sneaking around together. After this it was being able to be affectionate without it being hidden in insults or alone in their room once they knew everyone was asleep.

It kind of scared Baz - being happy. He always felt so caught in the middle; being Simon’s enemy but sick in love with him, always wanting to please his mother but being a disgrace to her name, always wanting to live but so unsure of what path he walked.

He could hardly tell what he wanted anymore.

Lost in his thoughts, Baz hadn’t noticed Simon standing in the doorway. He looked up, seeing the bronze curls before anything else, and smiled. He was always smiling around Simon.

“Took your time.”

“I got lost,” Simon admitted sheepishly.

Baz shifted along so that Simon could sit down next to him. “Finally took my advice then?”

Simon tried to scowl, but it melted into a smile before he could stop it. Baz’s heart skipped a beat watching it. He still couldn’t believe that Simon looked at him like that.

“What’re you so smiley about tonight?” He asked, trying not to sound too serious.

“You,” Simon answered, kissing him before he could argue back.

This is what most of their nights were like: just excited and content to be with each other. Even if it was in freezing underground tunnels at ridiculous times at night. They liked being together, liked huddling into each other instead of glaring across a classroom just to keep up an act.

They sat like that for a while, Simon cuddled into Baz’s side, Baz dragging his fingers through messy, bronze curls.

Occasionally, Baz would lean down and kiss Simon, just because he could down here. He loved that he could kiss Simon to his heart’s content down here, kiss him until their lips turned blue. That he could place a hand on the back of his neck and Simon would give the sweetest smile he’d ever seen in his life.

That down here, Simon was all his.


When midnight rolled around, Simon was nearly asleep on Baz’s shoulder.

Baz was still playing with his hair, a dumb smile on his lips. Baz smiled so much when he was with Simon that sometimes Simon wondered if it hurt his mouth. He’d asked him that once, and Baz had just laughed, and Simon still didn’t have an answer.

Simon knew he asked stupid questions a lot, and sometimes, he’d ask them just to see how much stupidity Baz could handle from him (surprisingly, a lot). He liked talking to Baz, even if sometimes he was just talking at him while he done something else. Liked watching how his face changed while he talked.

He liked Baz. Simon wasn’t sure if there was anything he liked more in the world than he liked Baz. Except maybe getting his happy ending with Baz, but he didn’t know if he was going to get that, so he didn’t count it.

Simon wondered what Baz was thinking. He could hardly ever tell. Even after nearly eight years of sharing a room and nearly three years of being boyfriends Baz was still like a closed book. More like sealed shut with fucking superglue, Simon thought.



“We need to leave, Love. It’s past midnight.”

Simon groaned, and Baz laughed gently.

It was a rule that after midnight they went back to their room. It was Baz who had introduced the rule, knowing full well that Simon would be half asleep by then. And, well, Baz hadn’t been proven wrong yet.

Baz stood up without warning, letting Simon jerk himself awake. He groaned again. Simon hated when Baz done that.

Baz helped him to his feet, then kept hold of his hand as they made their way back into the winding tunnels. Simon let Baz lead, he didn’t know his way about nearly as well as Baz did. Plus, he wasn’t nearly awake enough to know where he was going either.

They were out of the tunnels soon enough, clambering through the doorway in the White Chapel. Simon dusted himself off, and looked up to find Baz just waiting on him.

“How are you not dirty? It’s filthy down there!”

“Vampire.” Baz answered back boredly.

“That can’t be your answer to everything, Baz.”

He raised an eyebrow, shrugged.

Arsehole, Simon thought.


The next morning at breakfast, Simon couldn’t stop yawning.

Once he and Baz had gotten back to their room, he’d jumped straight into bed and fallen asleep. But he still felt tired. Still felt pain in his neck and still felt like his eyelids couldn’t have been any heavier.

“You know,” Penny said, pouring some tea. “You could just put a tie on the door handle instead of sneaking down to the catacombs every night. I’d get the memo.”

Simon nearly choked on his scone.

Just Go With It (Prof! Rogers x Reader)

Chapter One | Chapter Two

Previous Chapter

Word Count (2,972)

AN: sorry i’m such a dramatic bitch

Steve Rogers would be a liar if he said he hadn’t been thinking of calling you up and asking you on a date. He’d also be a liar if he said his palms weren’t sweating up a storm as he waited for both of your coffees to be finished. After quickly locking up his office he had walked you down the street to this nice little cafe, earning grins from plenty of his students when you two entered. You kept nodding as he spoke and fiddled with your fingers to keep busy.

You were nervous and for some reason he was scared to know why.

When he approached the booth you had settled into, he set your cup down and sat across from you, you smiled your thanks at him and took a sip.

“So, uh.. Why are you here?” he asked and your eyes locked with him and he cleared his throat, “Not that.. It’s a problem! You look great by the way,” he said quickly and you couldn’t help but smile.

Steve relaxed, and sighed, “Sorry, I’m just-”


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Title: Snow Laden Confessions 

Pairing: Sidlink

Rating: Explicit

Summary:  Sidon and Link confess their love for each other after being stranded during a bad snowstorm, then proceed to find a unique way to keep themselves warm -wink, wink, nudge, nudge-

A/N: i hate thinking up titles : D

This has also been posted on my AO3 so if you’d prefer to read it there! Comments, reblogs and kudos are very much appreciated! Thanks!


Don’t make this weird, he thought fervently. Whatever you do, do not make this weird.

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Apologize (Zach Dempsey)

Originally posted by jeffatkjns

Pairing: Zach Dempsey/Reader
Words: 1760+
Warning(s): some swearing, bullying
A/N: Im having some writers block so I listened to some music and thought of this. Uh i may accept some 13RW requests but?? i didnt really care much for the show lol sorry,,the song doesnt represten teenagers and teenagers in love, but i was looking at it as symbolic. I hate writing when im tired but lbh, im always tired.
Summary: (Y/N) is the shy, choir girl who is secretly dating Zach Dempsey, one of the popular jocks. She plans on doing a surprise solo for the big performance and she plans to dedicate it to Zach, but what happens when Bryce wants to pull a prank on the soloist during practice and Zach doesn’t know who is singing.
Song: Olet Puolisoni Nyt (Its such a beautiful song, you should give it a listen)

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Hello, Beauty

PIETRO MAXIMOFF x Plus Size Reader

Request Hey girly! Can I request a little Pietro one shot where he flirts with the reader obnoxiously, like sexual and super flirty(because that’s totally his thing) and no matter how hard everyone tries to convince her he’s being serious she’s like “no wtf he’s Pietro Maximoff that’s just how he is” but then he gets home from a gnarly mission or something and he tells her he just needs to hold her? Pleaseeeee💘

Pietro flirts with no shame, but you’re too dense to realize he’s being honest.

Content: Pining, confessing feelings, mention of a near death experience

Pietro flirts with you. That’s his thing. He swoops in and out of your presence at random times throughout the day, and never leaves without at least a wink or a, “Hey, hottie,” or a smirk as he runs his eyes up and down your body. He’s so obnoxiously obvious about it that you know it’s a joke, even though you wish it wasn’t. You’ve seen him literally charm the pants off of at least three dozen girls in the past year you’ve known him. He flirts with everybody, every single member of your mutual group of friends, and it never once occurs to you that he gives you that little extra bit of attention. Because he doesn’t, as far as you can see, so you continue on trying to ignore that weight on your chest whenever he gives you a compliment or says something slightly filthy. And of course Pietro never makes you uncomfortable, always says he’ll back off if you want him to, but you don’t ever want him to stop. Even though the tugging at your heartstrings and the nights of feeling completely and utterly lonely are almost a hundred percent due to him not returning your feelings at this point, he makes you feel good. The glances and the words and the little touches and hugs and kisses on the cheek make you feel like a damn superstar, and sometimes you don’t even care if he ever falls in love with you or not so long as he doesn’t stop being your friend. So you suffer in silence, and you know you’ll never go a day without at least one compliment as long as Pietro is around.

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