rolling skill

The mounted magician

Context: a friend of mine bought a pathfinder beginner Box with some pre made characters and a simple dungeon crawl. The wizard character was proficient in the ride skill.

Dm: as you approach the cave, you see to the left a statue of a humanoid creature, but something seems off about it

Ranger: can I inspect…

Wizard (interrupting): I fuck the statue! Rolling ride skill! *17*

DM: you successfully mount the statue, after about 2 minutes of awkward grunting, you notice that the statue is coated in acid. As you finish, you take 1d4 acid damage. The statue is satisfied, and may call you later.

Okay, I bet at this point there is literally no one, I MEAN N O  O N E, on this Godforsaken website that doesn’t know Yuri!!! On Ice. But for the minuscule amount of you who don’t know/don’t watch Yuri!!! On Ice, here is what you are missing.

The Characters

Yuuri Katsuki: He’s a twenty-three-year-old Japanese figure skater that went from:

To this: 

IN THREE DAMN EPISODES. 

WE USED TO THINK THIS BOY WAS A CINNAMON ROLL… HE IS NOT. 

Skills: Ice Skating, ballet dancing, being hot, seducing Russian celebrities, break dancing, pole dancing, and being adorable as fuck. 

He is relatable AF: has a breakdown before an important event, has a mental illness, likes food, has idolized someone he’d really only seen from afar and GOT ENGAGED TO HIM AFTER ABOUT A YEAR OF GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER (THEY ARE GETTING MARRIED AND YOU CANNOT TELL ME OTHERWISE). Basically, anything this guy can do, EVERYONE CAN DO. 

He’s blind without his glasses. 

Victor Nikiforov: He’s a twenty-seven-year-old Russian figure skater that has won gold at the Grand Prix Finals five consecutive years in a row. 

He’s hot AF and STILL LOOKING FREAKING AMAZING. *WOLF WHISTLE* SIGN ME UP FOR THE NEXT GRAND PRIX.  

Skills: Figure skating, having the best damn English Dub accent ever, ballet dancing, dancing in general, also is adorable as fuck, and literally the most charismatic guy ever. HE GETS ALONG WITH EVERYONE. 

He owns a poodle. His name is Maccachin. This is him:

Victor is the sappy LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT DORK. 

Yuri Plisetsky: A 15-year-old angry kitten boy Russian skater prodigy. He’s known as the Russian Punk, the Russian Fairy, and the Russian Ice Tiger. The fandom refers to him as Yurio to differentiate from Yuuri K. 

This is Him: 

Skills: Being an angry kitten, figure skating, being a smol bean son, being emo, being a fantastic fangirl protector, loving cats, ballet dancing, break dancing, being embarrassed, and AGAPE (Pronounced: Ah-Gah-Pay). 

He loves his grandpa, he secretly loves his fandom, and most importantly, all he wants is to be loved and accepted by his precious parents: Victor and Yuuri. 


NEXT UP

THE PRODUCERS/WRITERS OF SHOW: 

THEY FUCK US OVER EVERY EPISODE. Literally, this was everyone during each episode. 

Episode 1: There’s no way it can gayer than this. 

Episode 2: There’s no way it can gayer than this. 

Episode 3: There’s no way it can gayer than this.

Episode 4: There’s no way it can gayer than this. 

Episode 5: There’s no way it can gayer than this. 

Episode 6: There’s no way it can gayer than this. 

Episode 7: There’s no way it can gayer than this. 

Episode 8: I swear if that dog dies I will start stabbing people. 

Episode 9: IT’S BEEN A LONG DAY~ WITHOUT YOU MY FRIEND~ AND- OH MY GOSH THAT HUG THO IT’S LIKE A MARRIAGE PROPOSAL. 

Episode 10: What? What the fuck? What happened?! WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING. THIS EXPLAIN SO MANY THING!! UNFOLLOW ME NOW THIS WILL BE THE ONLY THING I TALK ABOUT FOR A LONG TIME.


It’s not queerbaiting. I’ll say it again: IT’S NOT QUEERBAITING. This has a canon gay couple and it’s treated on the same level and respect as a heterosexual couple. 

It’s not classified as yaoi or shonen-ai. 

Somehow it seems like the producers/writers are watching us and keeping up with the fandom. Like, in episode 10 it broke EVERYONE. It tore down what we originally thought was canon, and made it a million times better with NO PLOT HOLES. LIKE WHAT BLACK MAGIC FUCKERY IS THIS??!?!

COSTUMES: 

ANIMATION: 

Opening Song: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5u3RGhznctE

CAN YOU FEEL MY HEART BEAT TIE THE FEELING NEVER ENOUGH I CLOSE MY EYES AND TELL MYSELF THAT MY DREAMS WILL COME TRUE.

Closing Song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Onv0V1UIps

YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE 


This show breaks all stereotypes.

The American Skater is a Latino that choreographs who’s own music and programs. 

We ship him with a little Chinese skater named Guang-Hong Ji. Their ship name is called Leoji. 

The Canadian is an asshole…that’s right, the Canadian is an asshole that goes by King JJ. 

It’s not yaoi, it’s yuri too. There is a Russian girl named Mila and an Italian girl named Sara. Some of us ship them. I refer to it as Mira Shipping. 

Some of us also ship Yurio and Otabek (*furiously searches what nationality he is*). We don’t have a ship name yet. But Yurio is like 15-16 canon wise, and Otabek is 18. They’re perfect for each other. 

THIS SHOW IS PERFECTION. 

ONE OF US

ONE OF US 

ONE OF US

AND FOR THOSE OF YOU LOOKING FOR THE LIE… THERE IS NONE. THIS IS ALL 100% TRUE. 

This show is a massive mindfuck and everything I have ever needed in my life.

Bonus: We trend #1 at every week. 

Memorable Quotes:

“Without beauty, strength is nothing.” -Lillia Baranovskaya 

“Seduce me with all you have.” -Victor Nikiforov 

“We’ll get married once he wins a gold medal.” -Victor Nikiforov

“I think I’m going to come.” -Christophe Giacometti

When I open up, he meets me where I am. I shouldn’t be afraid to open up more!” -Yuuri Katsuki. “I want to be hated as the man who took Viktor from the world!” -Yuri Katsuki

You have to do the opposite of what people expect. How else will you surprise them?” -Victor Nikiforov

How can someone who can’t motivate others motivate himself?” -Victor Nikiforov.”

“Yuri Plisetsky. Do not use untasteful words.” -Lillia Baranovskaya. 

One More Thing:

We don’t have shipping wars, we have spelling wars

It’s either Victuuri (THIS ONE FIGHT ME), Viktuuri, Victuri, or Vikturi. Yes, the shipping name sounds like Victory!

Basically, it’s worth watching.

~Admin Hails. 

Malec Parenting: Archery

The thing which Max and Rafael argued most about when they were both training at the institute was who was better. Better at sword play, better at knife throwing, better at hand to hand combat, and, most importantly, better at archery.

One day they were having their typical argument, Rafael claiming to be better at archery, and Max saying that it was impossible. Finally, Rafe said, “Then let’s settle this with a competition.”  

Max nodded and said, “Daddy, come be the judge of our competition.”

Keep reading

sweet ophelia (an elizabeth midford fanmix)

i. state of dreaming - marina and the diamonds | ii. carousel - melanie martinez | iii. bodyache - purity ring | iv. you the starry eyed - beats antique | v. bird in a cage - spelles | vi. 9th pawn - oho | vii. warrior - aurora | viii. sweet ophelia - zella day

{listen on 8tracks}

datpan replied to your post: datpan replied to your post: How can you be so…

DND KFP

except they’d all be monk class

kfp au where its just a really elaborate dnd game and po is the newbie that makes ridiculous rolls