female awesome meme | [2/5] female characters who are unfairly hated jyn erso, rogue one: a star wars story (2016)
Saw Gerrera used to say one fighter with a sharp stick and nothing left to lose can take the day. They’ve no idea we’re coming. They’ve no reason to expect us. If we can make it to the ground, we’ll take the next chance, and the next. On and on until we win… or the chances are spent.
not saying those first two D+D stories aren't wholly awesome themselves but I absolutely gotta have some more information on the instance where you seduced a dragon
okay fair enough and I don’t got any drawings for you today so story time it is;
alright so we’re like, at the end of this big ole campaign that’s been running a while and we’re facing the Big Cheese who is a sorceress who just went all maleficent on us and transformed herself into a dragon. It’s rad, she’s mad, we all have a good time, but due to some extremely unlucky rolls on our team and some real good rolls on the DM’s side the party is suddenly in a Bad Way; our wizard was dead, the fighter had been trapped in a block of ice, and the bard had just jumped out the window to save himself and landed in a dungheap. Frankly I still think that was an excellent idea and was probably the best move any of us made in that session.
My rogue, amazingly, was not doing all that hot either and was the only active player left- I had two HP, my arrows couldn’t pierce the dragon’s hide without the bard boosting my attack, she was out of range for a knife attack (throwing it would lose me the only effective weapon I had) and one of my legs was broken. Our DM is all sorts of guilt stricken and hadn’t expected things to go this badly, my companions are coming up with all sorts of get-out-of-jail plots but basically I can’t run, can’t attack, am nearly dead and there’s a dragon sorceress who’s about to eat me. I look at the only stat I rolled insanely well while making the character sheet… which is charisma.
So I ask if I can roll to seduce the sorceress. The DM looks at me like I’m insane, then a genius, then an insane genius, and allows it. Please also note that my rogue is tiny kenku, beaten to within an inch of her life, about to be toasted with hellfire and the sorceress who has been trying to crush our little band for the past year has more will than a stone fortress.
This says top ten fic recs and I was like ‘I guess I can limit myself to ten’ and now having started going through them I’m like ‘ahahahahahahah NO’ so without further ado, split into three categories, here are thirty-nine of my favourite Rebelcaptain fic recs, listed in no particular order, because you see how easy it was for me to cut down the list I have, there’s no way I could chose between them. The only concession I could make was to keep it to one per author, but know that if one is on the list, all the rest of their stuff is amazing too! All the links are to AO3 and I’ve tagged the authors on Tumblr when I know their handle, but if you spot one of yours and I’ve not tagged you, let me know! :) Recs are below the cut because this is a LONG POST.
So we were in a close quarters fight, our rogue gave up his awesome plan to throw an oil soaked net on top of the group we were fighting and then lighting it on fire to punch a guy in the nuts with his magic hand.
Rogue: “I use my magic hand to punch that guy in the nuts to make him drop his weapon.”
Everyone else ooc: “No go with your other plan, you’re going to waste your attack!”
DM: “Okay, roll an attack.”
Rogue: “…I rolled a nat 20.”
DM: *after laughing for a solid 5 minutes* “Okay, you punch him in the nuts for 3 damage. He screams and drops to the ground. He drops his weapon to put his hands over his nuts.”
i wanted to make something cool and accurate but i made this instead (with dumb princess diaries and deadpool references i know forgive me)
anyway this fic is superflicious wonderful amazing and everybody needs to read it and send love to the author (also much love to @runakvaed and this flawless edit without whom id never have discovered it)