Just had a thought for an action hero thing: 30-something woman hero is doing her ass-kicking thing. One day, her boss shows up at her door, and tells her she has to stand down, or there will be consequences. “Honey, it’s not that you’re too old. It’s just the public don’t like to see a woman of your age saving the day. It feels emasculating”.
So woman is stripped of her support team, fellow agents, and is pretty much put on the shelf. She tries to do heroing, but keeps getting cockblocked by younger women or superhero men she used to work alongside.
Just when she’s hitting rock bottom (and sitting in her house wearing pyjamas and eating ice cream), there’s a knock at the door. Judi Dench is standing there, and our heroine assumes it’s a charity collection.
“Oh no, dear,” Dench says, smiling. “We’ve come to recruit you.”
“Recruit me? For what?”
“To do what we do best: save the bloody world.”
And all at once she’s part of a covert ops team made of all the older women who have been retired and who currently are holding the reins of managing the world.
An Aquarius was throwing and making a mess in his own room after he found out that she, his girlfriend, had finally moved on without him. I looked as he cuss and threw away some of the mementos of her, and finally stopped when he found an old photo of them together at a photobooth. He sat down and started to burst into tears. “If only.. If only I told her everything, and hadn’t kept it all in, maybe she would’ve stayed..” he said through the tears.
An Aries looked through his twitter and found a picture of his ex with someone else, he let out a soft chuckle. “Oh shit..” he laughed, and slowly he stood up and continued to laugh. “Look at this. Look at her.. Oh, she’s.. she’s fucking hilarious.” He slowly started to laugh so hard, and I watched as he began to shake and slowly made his way to the balconey and started to scream about her, just screamed her name and called her names and how he hated her but finally he broke down and cried.
A Cancer started shaking and tries to grab his phone out of our reach. “Please, let me just call her..” we shook all our heads and told him to just stay put. He begged that it’ll be just for tonight. We told him that he has had enough, but he wouldn’t listen. He wanted to call her so bad, but the truth is.. she’s about to have her wedding in a week, and he was going to tell her he still loves her after all these years.
A Capricorn and I were out in mid-town late at night, and he had too much to drink. He sways as he walks, and suddenly one of Bryson Tiller’s songs played through one of the bars nearby and he let go of me and sang through the whole verse. He finally stopped and looked at me and said, “This shit, that’s me. I wished God would saved her for me. That’s it, and fuck.. I’m not really at my best at the moment, but I loved her.”
A Gemini breath out smoke after inhaling his cigarette and he looked at the city lights from our view. “I miss her..” was all he said, taking another inhale from his cigarette. He looked at me and gave me a small smile and back at view.
A Leo drank with me, and place an arm around my shoulders and said, “I shouldn’t drink too much. These crazy thoughts are hunting me again, and I just want to crush the world. Ha, oh she’s in my head. My ex, you know? She’s in here again and.. fuck! I hate her. I miss her. You know we’re talking again, right but just as "friends”? I want more than that..“ He gave me a small playful slap on the cheek and walked to get another drink. It’s going to be a long night.
A Libra rushed to her house, knocking at her apartment door. But it was locked. Ran back downstairs and started calling her name out her window, trying to get her attention. She finally opened the window and told him to leave. I watched from the car, as he asked for her forgiveness. She shook her head and said it was too late for him.
A Pisces admitted to me how he still thinks about his ex, and how he still calls out her name and how his mind would play memories of her every single day. He can’t stand the nights because his mind would play her, her voice, her smile, the way she would call him everyday and she was his rock. As he sits here with me, tears roll down his cheek and he said, "Now here I am still holding on to her, just waiting for a sign that maybe she’d come back, and maybe we can try again.. but also maybe she’s with someone else, who.. who treats her well than I could’ve had and.. I want her to be happy, I do, but I wish.. right now.. she could be happy with me, and I am so selfish for it..”
A Sagittarius once said that he used to think too much about the relationship and how every time he was with her he would start to overthink every scenario of how she would leave him, and he would tell her and she would shook her head and promised him she would never leave… and now that she’s gone he still can’t stop thinking about her..
A Scorpio said to me, “I’m just not too sure if I could ever ask her to come back. I really messed up, you know? I could try, but would she ever give me another chance to prove to her my real worth? Can she really do that..?” I was a little loss for words. Knowing Scoprio and how he is, he seemed to be really serious about her. I just didn’t know what to say.
A Taurus and I passed by a coffee shop and he paused and peered through and saw his ex with someone else, and she’s laughing and holding this man’s hand. He gritted his teeth and his fist clenched. I put a hand on his shoulder and told him to let it go. It’s been years since they’ve together and been a two years after their break up. He slowly looked down in defeat and sighed. He walked off ahead of me..
A Virgo and I were driving out late one night around the city, and all the songs he played were just old, sad R&B music and I would watch him from time to time as he mumbled some of the lyrics to himself and would let out a small smirk when the singer goes and says, “I love you and miss you..” and he shook his head. We pulled up to a parking lot, and he got out and looked at me and said, “I do miss her, but do you think she misses me..?”
The feeling of music wrapping around your body, soul, and mind is unlike anything you can understand if you’ve never been to a concert.
The giddy feeling of seeing other people with the same taste in music the closer you are to the venue. The shaking hands at the gate getting your ticket checked. The pounding of your heart in your ears as you hear the crowd. The soaring feeling of first entering the main concert area. The fleeting nervousness of wondering if it’s everything you’ve been building it up to the past few months. The jumpy starts and ‘wait it’s starting’ that you say 100 times thinking you see the artist entering. The roaring of the crowd with the excitement filling up your whole body, soul, and head. The dead silence of all the lights suddenly turning off. The anticipation of the whole crowd filling your whole body in an overwhelming breathtaking excitement. Those few seconds of the best type of agony in the world waiting for those opening lines. And finally.
The blog rushing in your ears, and the louder-than-a-bomb screams, the heart soaring and feet stomping and screaming the lyrics at the top of your lungs until you just know you won’t have your voice again for a few days. The few moments where you take a step back to realize where you are, to savor it, to engrave this feeling deep into your heart and never forget it. Because you’ve been waiting for months upon months for this concert and not a damn soul is going to ruin it for you. The first song you will always remember, because even if you’ve only heard it live once it’s permanently engraved deep into your brain, the thunderous ear and heart pounding yells the sudden change from neck breaking anticipation to the heart swinging, foot stomping voice breaking pure unadulterated joy and adrenaline when you finally hear the first cords.
And of course, every concert has a few songs that take you back in time. Whether it’s songs from their first album, or songs you grew up hearing your parents playing on Friday nights when the neighbors came over and you’d dance till your feet were sore in the living room. Maybe a slow song that gave you a different type of joy. A heartbreaking joy that reminds you of the good old days, of how time is still moving forward whether you like it or not. Reminding you that just for a few hours time doesn’t exist, the songs come one after another again and again. Maybe a heartbreaking song from the past instead of reminding you of the old days and how you’re moving forward it reminds you that it was a different kind of broken perfect. It makes your heart want to pause time and cry for hours on the floor or the safe corner in between the bookshelf and the wall. But instead you hold your head high, unabashedly crying, because the people and music surrounding you make you stronger. And you’re. Not. Giving. Up. Today.
And suddenly the music is back again. The music that makes you stomp your feet and swing your head and shout the lyrics till your voice is hearse.
And then… it’s over before it feels like it even started, hours streaked by in what seems like seconds. You want to turn back time. You leave your seat, or the pit. Awestruck, maybe with leftover tears on your face, or fresh tears. You get a shirt, because this place will never leave your heart. It’s forever engraved in your heart. You’ll visit this place in your dreams, you’ll talk about it for weeks on end. Just to make sure you don’t forget a single detail. If you came with a friend or alone, you’ll sit in awestruck silence on the way home, your brain still remembering and replaying every memory. Certain bits played again and again in your head like a perfect broken record.
And then your home, and you’re so exhausted that you can’t fall asleep. You play back the videos you took. Relishing in the moment. But it’s not the same. The sound is, empty. It’s not the same. You know you’ll go back. You have to go back.
Because that’s what I live for. The heart pounding, feet stomping, head swinging, whole body experience of a concert. Because it’s not just the ears. It’s my soul, my body, my feet, my eyes. Every sense and ten other that you didn’t know existed coming to life.
You’ll be back, maybe a few months, maybe a few years, you don’t know when, but you know you will. Because this is not the end. This is not your last. The music and the crowd will always draw you back, back to a place where you and I can both feel safe.
deep red tail, travels all over, wears gifts from infatuated humans, often mistaken for underwater fire or sunken rubies, spotted teasing sailors out at sea
pearly pink tail, lives near a small ocean side town with a legend of a beautiful mermaid, never seen but often a lovely inhuman song is heard
sunny yellow tail, goes from beach to beach, collects bottled messages among other things, wears shell charm jewelry, likes to watch humans from a distance, occasionally talks to a sole person wandering the beach but no one believes the person after
silvery tail, lives near a ligthhouse, pulls drowning people to shore, pearls, spotted singing on moonlit nights
golden tail, lives in a coral reef castle, friends with all the sea creatures, spotted on beaches of tropical islands but disappears before any photos can be taken
off-white cream tail with spots of beige and brown, lives in a cave, leads lost people to their cave for shelter, sometimes those who have done unspeakable things mysteriously disappear and those who have been wronged receive sudden good luck, spotted just before these strange incidents
pastel blue and mint green tail, lives near a bustling city, fell in love with a human, makes various arts and crafts with what they find in the water, spotted combing hair
deep blue tails, lives out at sea, may lure a sailor to their death or save them (depends on the sailor), shark teeth necklaces, knows what lies in the deepest crevices of the ocean, spotted staring up out of the water with glowing eyes
plum tail, never stays in one place, decorated with souvenirs of adventures, has pulled entire ships to shore, can often be heard talking and laughing but if spotted will smile before swimming away
emerald green tail, lives in arctic waters, helps people without them knowing, concerned about melting ice caps, could fight a sea lion if they had to, silhouette spotted under the ice
shimmering rainbow tail, lives in deep water but is decorated with human trinkets from their visits to the shore, wants to learn about both humans and bottom of the sea, spotted sitting on rocks staring up at the sky
iridescent aqua tail, lives near a beach with a tragic story of a mermaid and her lost love, will just as soon drown you as play with you, wears jewelry of shards of pottery and sea glass, on stormy nights some say they hear weeping
ARIES: Aphrodite, The Goddess Of Love & Ares, The God Of War:
“I am made of war and she is made of love but what makes war, if not love?”
TAURUS: Orpheus, The Musician & Eurydice, The Oak Nymph:
“She was everything. A world with hope, a taste of the divine. My home was empty, she was gone, forever. But I would find her in all things, in hooded sun, in the name-whispering breeze scented with her perfume, in the dreamless darkness in which she walked.”
GEMINI: Echo, The Nymph Of Mountains & Narcissus, The Thespian Hunter:
“Shall the water not remember, my hand’s slow gesture, tracing above its mirror my, half-imaginary portrait? My only belonging is my beauty, which I take away and then return as love.”
CANCER: Selene, The Titan Moon Goddess & Endymion, The Shepard Prince:
“She was beautiful beyond men’s prayers for beauty, and she drew her silvery flesh out of the starlit air and her cold sweetness from the midnight dew. Virginal was she, loveliest, austere with visible purity. A godlike love swathed her soft shape in plumes of snow-white flame”
LEO: Helen Of Troy & Paris, The Trojan Prince:
“He looked at her as if she were the sun. One look like that can ruin or rescue, depending on which fairy tales you read, and she had read them all. Eyes like those could never lie, she thought, so when he looked at her, she saw all the devastation he would cause in her name, and all the inevitability of their demise, and all the women who chose peace over passion. To hell with peace. I want a lover like a hurricane or a lightning strike. Love should leave no survivors. So you will be my Paris, and I will be your ship to wreck.”
VIRGO: Odysseus, King Of Ithaca & Penelope, The Faithful Wife:
“Long as the day in the summer time, Deep as the wine dark sea, I’ll keep your heart with mine. Till you come to me.”
LIBRA: Pygmalion, The Sculptor & Galatea, The Statue:
“He slid his arm around the coolness of disdain, felt the distance of an Arctic plain, Rested his hand Upon an alabaster thigh, Saw eternal haughtiness in stony eyes. Human heart has he; She heart of stone - To tempt a man to be so close, but always so alone.”
SCORPIO: Eros, The God Of Love & Psyche, The Goddess Of The Soul:
“He would pluck the feathers from his shoulders, Set flames upon his bow, Drain celestial blood from his veins and become her equal, If that is what it took to deserve her; To share that grin one last time. Curse the gods, If he could only worship the light upon the pores of her skin.”
SAGITTARIUS: Perseus, Son Of Zeus & Andromeda, Princess Of Aethiopia:
“Who decided to call these chains? who said i was forced into who holds me? the rock i sit on is a throne of my choosing; the monster i’m to meet is a friend remembered; Perseus, i choose the water. Perseus, i choose salvation. Because at least this, i can say; the waves have never silenced me the way you always have”
CAPRICORN: Hades, God Of The Underworld & Persephone, Goddess Of Spring:
“He crept into her heart, seeking to devour her, but he was the one consumed”
AQUARIUS: Pyramus, The Handsome Youth & Thisbe, The Beautiful Maiden:
“My Sunset had been darkly beautiful, Asplash with deep reds and purple, crowned in gold. Oh that I had been Pyramus and she Thisbe. Star-crossed and Tragic, A love made eternal by mutual deaths”
PISCES: Leander, The Mortal & Hero, The Virgin Priestess:
“Love is not full of pity, as men say, But deaf and cruel where he means to prey. And now she wished this night were never done, And sighed to think upon th'approaching sun; For much it grieved her that the bright day-light Should know the pleasure of this blessed night, And them, like Mars and Ericyne, display, Both in each other’s arms chained as they lay.”
Sun: Lilith / Sun aspects are about developing a healthy ego in terms of the input of the natural wild that exists within the body and world around them. They need to learn that trying to control the wild will earn them grief, while supporting and directing it will teach them to work with it and become more whole.
Moon: Lilith / Moon aspects indicate that the emotions are involved in an inner conversation with the uncontrollable natural feminine or wild within them. This could lead to mood swings / being moody if ungrounded or to living on the full spectrum of emotional possibilities available to them if grounded.
Mercury: With these aspects, the mind and thought processes are conversing with the inner wild instinct. These people need to let instinct guide their inner minds and curiosities, and allow their minds to learn to function in unique, non-rigid ways. Deep and analyzing levels of perception / sensory input await those who allow Lilith to inform their minds.
Venus: Lilith / Venus aspects bring the need for a person to learn about relationships, values, resources, and money by twisting instinct. People may look good on paper but if they don’t smell right, forget them!! It’s critical with these aspects to feel in the body what people, activities, opinions, and choices are right.
Mars: Lilith / Mars aspects are about the conscious will and desire of a person being in contact with their inner wild. Mars is pretty instinctive without Lilith, and so the task is to make sure Mars’ reactivity is informed not by knee-jerk or rote but in line with what is best for them going forward. Lilith offers Mars the wisdom of the natural world to go with its get-up-and-go energy.
Jupiter: Lilith / Jupiter aspects give an insatiable, ravenous sexual energy but also a real need for those physical reactions to be tantric. Sex has to bring one in contact with the divine, which is similar to Lilith / Neptune. But where Lilith / Neptune is fantasy forming, yearning, unrequited, and ultimately celibate, Lilith / Jupiter has to be very, very physical. If this aspect is not channeled into sex, then it becomes a very zealous approach to spirituality.
Saturn: Lilith / Saturn aspects indicate that the person’s maturity and structure function needs to be taught by the uncontrolled, instinctive wild of Lilith. Any rigidity that does not serve as a being on all levels must be reworked in order to allow Lilith’s primal wisdom to shine through. Lilith here needs to learn from Saturn that structure and a firm foundation can serve her purposes well.
Uranus: Lilith / Uranus aspects bring into conversation the need to be free and the need to be wild. The originality of Uranus can teach Lilith to leave behind situations that don’t serve her, and Lilith can teach Uranus to get back in the body and not get stuck in the head - too much detachment and objectivity leads to disconnection, after all.
Neptune: Lilith / Neptune aspects show the inner conversation between the surrender function and the inner wild. Connecting to nature is a primary tool for each archetype, and so people with these aspects need to get out and sit on rocks, surround themselves with nature and forms of wildlife. Much information that will help them stay conscious of having / being in a body is available through such activities.
Pluto: Lilith / Pluto aspects are about trying to figure out who gets to be strong and when. Within a person, Pluto needs honesty and truth, and Lilith needs autonomy, equality, and respect. Pluto can learn about honoring the passing and changing rhythms of their natural world while Lilith can learn from Pluto about sticking to guns when conviction and determination are needed. Both are and can be strong if the wild within the person is recognized and honored.
AC / DC: Lilith in aspect to the horizon says that relationships and self-definition carry Lilith’s themes in the person. Others to be played with need to be chosen through a process of opening to and trusting instinct. If they are not, sticky relationship issues can result they may make a person wish they could flee situations that aren’t working. If there is a pattern of this, check with how people are chosen to play with and why.
IC / MC: Lilith in aspect to this angle brings a need to know / honor the wild within the home and work environments. Instinct and inner, visceral wisdom need to come into play when it comes to how work is chosen and approached as well as how family, safety, and security are dealt with. Work and home relationships can stir up Lilith’s themes / issues and people with these aspects need to trust themselves to make the right decisions regarding balancing home and work no matter what.
Nodes: Lilith aspecting the Nodes indicates that developing a healthy relationship with the natural wild within has been an issue in many lives. These people need to shed cultural labels that get affixed to those who live Lilith stories and tap into the truth about humans - we are the extensions of the natural world, we all carry the energy of the uncontrollable wild within us, and we all need to make peace with who we really are.
Chiron: Lilith / Chiron aspects put the person’s energy antenna in a conversation with their need to relate to the natural world as an extension of it. A lot of emotional reactivity can result if the person feels threatened by others. What’s needed is that all possible expressions of humans be allowed in principle and honored, but that the person guides themselves to the right situations and experiences based on trust of instinct and of the body itself.
So imagine Steve works for a group of highly trained, deadly assassins- consisting of him, Bucky, Natasha, Peggy and Clint. They’re the best. The most efficient. You get taken out by one of them? No one will ever find the body.
(Unless they want people to)
And of course, because Steve is team leader and he has Scruples and Morals etc. he makes sure that any kills they make are against bad people. The worst people. The ones that need to go. He prides himself and his team for doing rigorous background tests before the deal is confirmed, in order to check that the person they’ve been hired to take out is really better off dead.
One day, Steve gets a call.
They ask him to take out Tony Stark.
And yes, that’s the Tony Stark. The billionaire weapons designer, making his fortune off bombs and WoMD’s at the age of thirty. The one in the front of magazine covers and the center of scandals and the highlight of every party.
The client tells Steve that he’s been dealing his weapons to terrorists under the table. That he’s responsible for funding groups like the Ten Rings, who are slaughtering people in the middle east. They don’t give a name, but Steve guesses they work closely with Stark.
By the end of the call, he’s already pretty convinced.
Unfortunately, because this is Tony Stark they’re talking about here, they can’t just go in and do a background check. They’re smart, and Natasha can hold her own against firewallas and computers, but this isn’t the same thing.
Because it’s Tony Stark.
If they pulled it off, it would be the biggest deal they’d ever made. It would make them infamous. They could throw money at any charity they wanted, give back to community in more ways than just killing.
Steve is half the way to just packing up his sniper and finding a rooftop. It’s only when Bucky gives him a stern talking to about getting trigger-happy that he realises company policy still stands. Even with a man like Stark.
“How the fuck are we supposed to work out if the claim is true or not? We can’t get near the guy,” Steve argues.
Bucky just smiles, and raises an eyebrow. “Unlike you, pal, I actually did some research. I got contacts around them businesses, and you know what I found out? Stark wants a bodyguard. His old one’s been injured and can’t come back for six months.” The man claps delightedly. “We got ourselves the perfect way in, Stevie.”
Steve frowns, because that sounds like it’s going to take a long time and if what their client is saying is true, they need to stop him, now. “So what, you gonna go in there all glammed up and offer yourself as his body-guard?”
Bucky grins, and pats him on the shoulder. “Nope. You are gonna in there all glammed up and offer yourself as his body-guard. I got Natasha to get you an interview, and Pegs is working on diverting any other potential candidates away. You’ll get it, no problem.”
Steve gapes, and Bucky just laughs. “Get ready to get up close and personal with Mr Terrorist, Tony Stark.”