Heavy lies the crown, says Jaha - a man
who is so irretrievably tangled up with the Ark in her head that when she looks
at him she can feel walls closing in. He’s the man who felled whole cities in a
microcosm; who flung good men and women off the world for being good men and women.
Who planted seeds in a little girl’s brain that grew into demons that killed
his son for being his son. Who turns over every rock in the search for
salvation, and instead of pearls and hope finds only spiders. Heavy lies the
crown – pidgin poetry, excavated from a long forgotten play. If Jaha has
mangled them, maybe it is because he felt the weight of leadership like a ring
of thorns around his head, piercing deeper with every swing of the axe.
Clarke doesn’t like that analogy. You
can take off a crown, and she knows that even if someone were to take her place
tomorrow – you can rest now, we’ll make the decisions, this isn’t on you – she
would always feel the things she’s done deep in her bones; see the people she’s
done them to every time she closes her eyes. Like phantom pain.
Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown
– these are the real words, and Clarke knows them better. Not a weight, but a hissing,
spitting voice in her head that won’t let her forget. She can’t picture herself
wearing a crown; only clutching broken fragments of something once precious,
death in her fist, blood seeping between her fingers as it shreds her skin to
The only solace is that Bellamy holds a
piece too, and though she wishes he didn’t have to, she is glad not to be
Psalm 62:1–2; 5–6 My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken. Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will not be shaken. There is one very important word that occurs four times in succession in those verses that we’ve just read. The word is “alone.” There’s only one ultimate source of salvation-Jesus Christ, and it’s very important that each one of us comes at some time in our lives to that place where we say, “He alone is my hope, my rock, my fortress, and the source of my salvation.” And, true enough, when we say that, it becomes true in our experience.
Come, let us sing for joy to the Lord; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.
Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song.
For the Lord is the great God, the great King above all gods.
In his hand are the depths of the earth, and the mountain peaks belong to him.
The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands formed the dry land.
Come, let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the Lord our Maker; for he is our God.