rob schneider is a carrot

family guy and south park have exactly two good jokes between them and i’m going to write them down here so you don’t have to watch the show

family guy

ringo starr runs into the beatles rehearsing room. “lads, i’ve written a song!” he exclaims, holding up a piece of paper. paul mccartney takes the paper from him. “oh, isn’t that nice, ringo!” he replies. “look everyone, ringo’s written a song! isn’t that lovely? i’m going to put it on the fridge, right here. where everyone can see it”

south park

goofy movie trailer narrator: this summer, rob schneider is…a carrot!
rob schneider: ahh! i’m a carrot!

there now you never have to watch them because that’s all they had to offer of value