road to the alter

2

A prankster this weekend hacked three portable electronic road signs belonging to the Texas Department of Transportation, and altered their message .Instead of the usual traffic warnings, such as “Lane Shift Ahead” or “Exit Closed”, the considerate hacker thought to let drivers know that “Donald Trump is a Shape Shifting Lizard” 👽

Now, pay attention, ‘cause I’m about to tell you the secret to life. You ready? The whole damn thing is about decisions, time, seemingly insignificant decisions that clear the road for monster truck life-altering ones. You see, every path you take leads to another choice, and some choices can change everything. Every damn moment of the rest of your life hangs on them.
—  The Choice (2016)
Men in yellow vests dug a hole at the end of my street. They wore helmets and scurried like beetles beside a truck with a telescopic arm reaching into the sky. These men pulled out the stoplight that governed the corner for years and years, from before I lived here. They replaced it with a three-way stop sign. Now, my timing is off. It’s hard to jump out on the busy road because motorists are left to define stop however they please. Cars come quick, one right after the other like office workers rushing through a revolving door. I hesitate at the edge of the curb like I’m shy on a high-dive and fear the plunge. Change is complicated. It is. Even the small ones. Old habits die hard. It’s a cliche, right? But it’s true, right? I like t-shirts worn to a perfection of comfort through years of wear. Worn down from oils in my skin, treasured because i know of their eventual, inevitable death. You get into rhythms and the rhythms get into you. They guide your way in your world. You get up at eight, you have coffee or you don’t. You check the burners of the stove before you leave, or you don’t. You worry about whether or not you unplugged the coffee pot, or you don’t. You rinse and you repeat, every day, because it brings the comfort of structure. The clock defines time, itself an abstraction. There’s no other way to tell time but to watch the hands go ‘round, or the colored numbers flip by. When the little hand reaches the number that means it’s OK to go into bed, we do. Yesterday, I sat at the new stop sign at the end of my street for more than a minute, out of reflex, waiting for the light to turn green. But there was no light. No green. Not even the late-night blinking yellow. It took a car horn to wake me from my paralysis. It urged me to adapt. To look. To think. To stop fantasizing about phantoms

[Painting: Estate by Robert Rauschenberg, 1963]
MUSIC SHUFFLE TAG

Tagged by @floydiansim

Rules: put your music on shuffle and list the first 10 songs, then tag 10 people.

  1. Iron Maiden - 2 Minutes To Midnight
  2. Pink Floyd - Marooned
  3. Amy Winehouse - You Know I’m No Good
  4. The Handsome Family - Far From Any Road
  5. Twenty One Pilots - Ruby
  6. Alter Bridge - I Know It Hurts
  7. Arctic Monkeys - Dancing Shoes
  8. Sleeping With Sirens - Left Alone
  9. Van Halen - Dance The Night Away
  10. Led Zeppelin - Achilles Last Stand

I tag: @foreignsims @nicotinc @femmesim @sayasims and everyone who wants to do it ~

Some Questions to Ask When Things Go Wrong

Ask yourself:

1. Is this something I should take seriously and try to put right; is it something that is worth working on, and investing more energy on?

2. How much is my fault? Is it something I can change further down the road?

3. How much is outside my control; will anything I do really alter the situation or make a lasting difference?

5. Have I done everything I possibly can? Have I tried and exhausted all possible options?

6. Is it something I should put behind me, and decide to walk away from?

7. Who else has gone through a similar experience, or had this happen to them? Who can I talk to who will understand, and give me valuable help and advice?

8. What can I learn from this experience?

9. How can I build myself up again, so I have the needed strength to go forward in my life?

10. What small steps can I take to enhance my self-esteem?

“We”

I had seen a gif or discussion about how someone wished that Owen would cup Amelia’s face in his hands like he has with April or Teddy. So this is the result of my mind wandering! Angsty fluff! 

She’d been staring at the four sticks for a while now. She didn’t know for how long, but she did know that when she had come into this tiny little room it had been light outside. From what she could see through the tiny window by the shower, dusk was just about setting. She also knew she had paged Owen 911 to her apartment about 5 times, probably leaving the poor man completely bewildered why he was being paged a surgery code to a residential building.

It’s kind of ironic how afraid she was of these sticks. Its not like she hadn’t taken one of these before. She’d been down this road before. Her life had been altered. But not in the way that it should have been.

When she was a child, her and Derek would sit in the back of her father’s store with a box of pick-up sticks.  They would time each other to see how fast they could pick them up. For being five years old, with her tiny little hands, she could always manage to pick up half the box, giving her brother a run for his money. It was such an innocent game, an overall innocent point in her life.

But these sticks were different. These sticks held so much more then just winning a game.  These were life-altering sticks.  

Looking at these sticks it took every ounce of strength in her to not want bolt. This was unexpected. Some would consider it an accident. She knew it wasn’t, but regardless this was one of those moments she wished she was still the old Amelia. The former version of herself would have bolted. Packed everything up and just left, dealing with this quietly and alone.  If fate and God had anything to do with it would likely be a similar situation like last time. This hypothetical baby would be missing some vital part of its body and she’d lose yet another person in her life.

 But the problem was she wasn’t her old self.  The feeling of wanting to run as she stood waiting for the results was being outweighed by another feeling. A feeling that could only be described as her entire body tingling in nervous energy, one might call it hope. She wanted these sticks to bring joy and not devastation. 

She wanted this life that she had missed out on before. She wanted a second chance. She deserved a second chance. 

So why couldn’t she pick up these sticks? 

She heard the front door of the apartment slam in a hurry, followed by distant hurried footsteps. 

“Amelia?" 

She wanted to hit herself for how worried he sounded. She probably had him imagining every possible worst case scenario.

"In here.” she called cautiously. 

She heard his footsteps get closer before the door opened in a rush. She moved her body forward to cover the sticks on the counter.  

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

She felt guilty. He was out of breath and clearly had tried to get here in a complete panic.

“Nothing… I….” she started to say.

“Nothing? Amelia you paged me 911 five times to our apartment. It can’t be nothing." 

She went to open her mouth to speak, her throat completely dry. Instead she moved her body, no longer blocking his view of the sink or the tests.

She watched as his he realized what he was looking at,his face softening.

"I haven’t looked yet." 

"Amelia." 

He took steps toward her as she put her hands up in defense. She could almost feel the awe and happiness oozing out of him. She didn’t want to be the one to crush that, to ruin it if there was no baby or worse if it was a baby with a medical deficit.

"Don’t…. I… just don’t." 

He disregarded her words as he stepped forward. She felt her teeth pulling at her lip as she let him slide into the spot beside her. He looked at her as she moved to step forward. She hesitated for a moment before she reached out and flipped over one of the tests.

Pregnant

She felt her heart pound as she quickly flipped over the other two tests which matched the results of the first one. 

She felt a small smile grace her lips as she felt Owen squeeze her shoulder as he stood there. She knew he was concealing his ecstatic emotions, toning them down on her behalf until she was ready. She placed a hand over his, her arm crossing over her body.

Just as quickly as she had felt the happiness swell from within her, she was suddenly crying. Borderline sobbing. Her breaths coming labored as she gripped tighter to the hand on her shoulder.

"Amelia.”

She heard him call her name, his voice laced with concern. She felt him tug her around as he let go of her shoulder and faced her towards him. She continued to cry as he put his hands on both sides of her cheeks.

“Amelia." 

She continued to cry, hiccup like sounds coming from her as she tried to cam down.

"Mia." 

She felt him gently tilt her face as she locked eyes with him. She tried to get herself down from this tornado of emotions. Tried to remember that this was a good thing.

"Mia we’re having a baby." 

She nod against his hands as she felt his calloused hands gently wiped away her tears.  

"A baby.”

She nodded again as she tried to calm herself down. She felt his hand move to push a piece of hair out of the way of her wet face.

“What if…”

“You can’t think like that." 

"I have to think like that Owen, okay? I can’t relive that again. I won’t do it. I can’t do it.”

She broke from his hold and quickly moved to discard the tests and clean up. She had wrapped all three tests up and was about to throw them away when she felt his hand on her back as he moved to stand right behind her. 

She closed her eyes, breathing slowly. She had snapped at him, ruined what has the potential to be one of the best moments of his life. 

“You’re not in this alone. This is a we thing Mia. You’re not alone this time." 

She felt tears escape her eyes again, as she hurried to wipe them away. We. He was right.  She wasn’t alone, no matter what may or may not be wrong, they were in this together. 

She turned around and instantly felt his arms wrap tightly around as her head went into the crook of his neck as she sniffled. They stood like that for a few moments before Amelia pulled back, Owen’s hands going to cup her face. 

She smiled a watery smile, as she let the tears fall, though this time they were happy.

"We’re having a baby." 

His grin grew from ear to ear as he let her words sink in. He leaned his nose to hers, his hands slipping to her waist, as hers went around his neck. 

"We’re having a baby.”

Plot idea: Coldflash, Vibes, (and why Cisco hates them)

Plot idea: “Cisco misses the days when his vibes were always filled with peril and shit-your-pants freakishness. It would be an improvement at this point. Thusfar (and he is keeping a tally) he has dropped his coffee, spit his coffee over three computer screens, and memorably once dumped his coffee, scalding hot, into the lap of one Harry Wells - all since Captain Cold took a time-traveling road trip in Rip Hunter’s ‘Lone Star’ Winnebago and started altering timelines. He has never wanted to see this much of Barry Allen’s ass on this many surfaces inside Star Labs, and he knows more about Snart’s Dick™ than is healthy for his sanity. At this rate, he’ll never finish another cup of coffee again. Not to mention Caitlin is going to think he’s starting to developing neuromotor spasms.“

Turned into a snippet on its own, but PLEASE DO EXPAND IT. Maybe a 5-times format? 5 times he saw something, and one time he did something about it. Basically, Cisco sees all the timeline changes happening because of the Legends team, but instead of all the Bad Apocalypse stuff, it’s just all the times Len and Barry get together and screw in Star Labs. And he can either get them when he touches these surfaces, or like random psychic moments because it’s affecting everything, not just individual objects. And eventually he catches them in person and just chucks his coffee at their heads in retaliation. Idk.

Some Questions to Ask When Things Go Wrong

Ask yourself:

1. Is this something I should take seriously and try to put right; is it something that is worth working on, and investing more energy on?

2. How much is my fault? Is it something I can change further down the road?

3. How much is outside my control; will anything I do really alter the situation or make a lasting difference?

5. Have I done everything I possibly can? Have I tried and exhausted all possible options?

6. Is it something I should put behind me, and decide to walk away from?

7. Who else has gone through a similar experience, or had this happen to them? Who can I talk to who will understand, and give me valuable help and advice?

8. What can I learn from this experience?

9. How can I build myself up again, so I have the needed strength to go forward in my life?

10. What small steps can I take to enhance my self-esteem?