river stix

my elf bard, allegra, went on her first mission today, she went to hell to save the soul of somebody in our party, but we were getting conned out of our money on the river stix by the riverman, who kept stopping every 1/3 of the river to ask for 500gp or else the boat would be attacked by water demons

so she took out a signed poster and used a performance check in place of a bluff to play an awesome song convincing this guy that the poster was the most valuable thing he’d ever seen, and since i poured so much into her charisma and perform skill, she got a 42

he believed it so hard he gave us back everything else he took previously and took us to the other side of the river safely, and the DM said it would probably be another 40 years before he realized that he got shafted because he thought it was so valuable he’d never sell it. but i said by then he’ll probably be a big enough fan of allegra’s music that it will have the greatest sentimental value, instead

thefantastickatinator  asked:

Top 5 Logan moments

This is a ridiculously hard question, and varies greatly, depending upon what mood I’m in.  

I love the guy.  He’s my favorite character of all time, so I want to name scenes where he’s doing positive, productive things and showing character growth.  

At the same time, I’m probably most entertained by him when he’s being an utter shithead.  That’s why I’m cheating, and splitting this question into two separate top fives.  

Top Five angel-on-my-shoulder Logan moments:

  1. Party scene in A Trip to the Dentist - it would have been so easy for Logan to just keep his mouth shut, and to allow people to believe what they wanted to believe.  Instead, he made the harder choice, publicly announcing what Veronica meant to him and throwing a gauntlet out for anybody who had a problem with their relationship.
  2. Boot scene in The Girl Next Door - again, Logan could have kept his mouth shut about the flagpole incident.  Weevil wasn’t exactly waiting around for him to come forward.  Here he proved that not only would he do the right thing without there being anything in it for himself, but he could look cool doing it.  Even in the world’s ugliest boots.
  3. Not Pictured  - He saw Beaver had a gun, and literally drew fire for Veronica.  He talked her out of killing Beaver, not because Beaver didn’t deserve it, but because he knew SHE’D never forgive herself.  Then he made her a perfectly round stack of pancakes.
  4. Epic Scene - Even after all the death, loss, and rejection, he still puts his heart out there (with the help of some liquid courage) because he’s afraid he’ll lose Veronica forever if he doesn’t.  
  5. Logan gives his professor an apple in Postgame Mortem - Okay, it’s a thirty-second scene, but it’s what it signifies that chokes me up.  Logan started Hearst for Veronica.  He went to his classes because Veronica wanted him to.  Here, he’s lost her forever (or for the next nine years), and here is where he decides to start living for himself and building a future for himself, regardless of who he’s dating at the moment.  I’ve never been so proud.

Top Five Devil-on-my-shoulder Logan moments

  1. Plan B -  That’s Honorary Deputy County Commissioner Echolls to you - Logan’s on fire in this episode, snarky, sarcastic, and not impressed with your shit. 
  2. Logan goes after Piz -  I have no shame.  Logan slamming open those cafeteria doors is so freaking hot.  
  3. Cop car meets baseball bat - Logan Fucking Echolls, ladies and gentlemen.
  4. Rescues Veronica at the River Stix - At least he tried the non-gun version first.  
  5. Aint No Magic Mountain High Enough - Come into my web, said the spider to the fly.  For the record, I do NOT approve of Logan’s pursuit of Hannah, yet I’m still mesmerized by his manipulation skills.
  6. Gory Sorokin, crash test dummy.  Couldn’t leave it off the list.  Couldn’t sacrifice any of the above, either.

Thank you so much for the ask, anon.  Posting this now, before I’m tempted to add 20 honorable mentions.  Like when he slips his test into the middle of the stack, or when he…

Veronica Mars/Logan Echolls Smut-A-Thon - WRAP UP!

Here it is: the end of February and time to wrap up the Smut-A-Thon! We’ve had an amazing twenty-three (!) new fanworks posted over the last twenty-nine days; from fabulous authors both new and experienced. If you’re reading this, the authors have been revealed, so head on over to the collection to check them out and gloat if you were right!

Creating works for others to enjoy is what fanwork-makers strive for and, regardless of whether or not an individual fic is to your taste, the attempt is always worth applauding! If you read and enjoy anything in the collection, please consider taking the time to leave some feedback to let authors know you enjoyed their story!


Here’s a run down of what our wonderful authors have produced! 

Two different fun fanfic tropes got explored in a “sexmarks” version of the Soulmate AU  that takes the Camelot kiss in sexy directions and in a fic with matchmaking sex pollen that helps fix post-S3 estrangement.

We had a few series-set “missing scene” fics, like Veronica’s thoughts about Logan and his gun after the River Stix in S2 and hot and tender closet sex and exhibitionism in the summer between S2 and S3,   

There were also series-era AUs posted, like S1 diverging when Logan runs into Veronica in her gamer outfit after “Wrath of Con,” and blazing sexual and emotional hotness in the form of S2 era Logan and Veronica at a sex club

Post-S3 future fics have long been a fandom favorite, and proved to be the most popular in the collection, this year. We’ve got everything from  the immediate aftermath of the cafeteria fight, and happy fluffy homecoming smut when Veronica returns for her second FBI summer internship to Logan and Veronica several years later as UST-y roommates with a puppy (!)  and Veronica fleeing from Piz’s potential proposal into the arms of our favorite reformed bad boy!

If this category of fic is your jam, we can also offer you Veronica on a case that leads to car sex, reunion, and what may be my all time favorite use of a head lamp ever and  a wonderful peek into future Veronica and Logan that may NOT turn out so wonderful for Keith.

And, of course, there were movie ‘verse AUs; including a wonderfully sweet and tempting look at what might have happened if Veronica and Logan had kept in secret contact throughout the time apart, a hot hot hot pair of sexy deployment emails and an AU where Veronica and Logan reconnect when she returns to Neptune even though he DOESN’T get accused of murder.

Full-bore whole series AUs were also very popular, bringing us lots of sexy times, including a delightfully fresh and sexy college AU, which spawned into a three-part series, featuring Logan and Veronica in a casual hook-up relationship that turns out to be not so much casual and not so much about hook-ups. Also: emotional smut where IT WAS ALL A DREAM and everyone (read: RT) is bad at math and a sexy and clever Logan POV where his long time friend Veronica is dumped by her boyfriend and is nudged his way by Lilly, moonlighting as a delightfully twisted Yente. 

Hanging out on the decidedly “E” end of the scale for series AUs, we have a Veronica/Logan/Lilly threesome that  offers a kinky AU set in Veronica’s graduation day dream ‘verse and also Mac setting complete strangers Veronica and Logan up on a date. By the third one, Veronica is…impatient and takes some action to move things along. 

Thank you SO MUCH to all of the wonderful authors and creators for coming out to play. It has been enormously fun to watch the collection fill up with your masterpieces. Thanks for sharing your stories with us!!  


This Smut-A-Thon was born out of admiration for @ghostcat3000​‘s fanworks festivus, and the way that it brought the community so many new and wonderful fanworks and engaged so many different creators.  

There were a lot of people involved behind the scenes in brainstorming this thing out and running it. Some wound up writing stories for the collection, some didn’t, but all contributed significantly to making the whole experience actually happen: @ghostcat3000​, @mysilverylining​, @cheshirecatstrut​, @marshmallowtasha​, @nevertothethird​, @scandalpantsstuff​, @susanmichelin

A very special shout out to @lilamadison11 who has made wonderful fan art covers for some of the stories. Creativity spawning creativity is exactly what we hoped would come out of this collection, so thank you SO much for blessing us with your talent. 


Lastly, WATCH THIS SPACE: Nothing is set in stone yet, but plans for a Summer Lovin’ Smut Challenge are underway! I welcome any and all suggestions or requests in my inbox! 

Dinner Date // Rave

Dave sat in the cab, fixing his tie again so that it rested comfortably against his chest. Before he’d left, he decided to at least try to look nice for his date. A simple blue button down shirt and a tie with a pair of jeans. He’d even tried styling his hair a bit, though it didn’t work out like he wanted and he ended up having to wash it out again to get it back to some-what decent. He looked down at the time, and he was already 5 minutes late because the driver had gotten turned around at a closed road. He eventually got to the apartment he knew belonged to River, and actually had to yell at the driver to stop before he got to far down the road.

Dave paid the driver (a lot more than he deserved for circling the same road three damn times) and ran back up the street and stood outside. He was a bit nervous, because despite being so comfortable around River, Dave still felt a little worried he would find some way to mess it up. After he finally got his heart rate down past the point of possible heart attacks, he knocked on the door and waited for River to answer. 

Veronica Mars thoughts on 3x08 Lord of the Pi's

Not even gonna try to touch a lot of this episode, but let’s take on the Logan/Veronica issue: is it okay for Logan to do what he did? “She’s not listening, so let me hire a guy”- who does that?!

Except, I think it just might be okay. Because I think Veronica’s refusal to stop her investigation has little to do with her conviction about the rapist, and so much more to do with stubbornness and independence. She yells as Logan in this episode, “It’s not like this is all some new facet of my personality. You know who I am! You know what I do.” But I don’t think that this behavior is narratively consistent.

Veronica has been in dangerous situations before- Aaron, the Fitzpatricks, Cassidy- but she does not purposely put herself in danger like this. The first time she ended up in the River Stix was by accident, following up a lead with Danny Boyd that she didn’t know would get her there. I won’t say that following a strange, creepy man into his backyard was advisable, but she didn’t know that she was getting into such dangerous territory. With Aaron and Cassidy, she was actually playing it smart, trying to get herself and others away from them rather than confronting them. Every time, she has been trying to avoid direct confrontation with danger that ended up catching up with her. Just last episode, she was willing to call Lamb- corrupt, incompetent Lamb- rather than go into the River Stix because even though she wanted to help Meryl, she knew how dangerous it was.

The rapist appears not only to know who Veronica is, but to be targeting her. He dosed her in a public space, and shaved her head not far away. It is deeply dangerous for her to continue investigating. Normal investigation, Logan doesn’t have a problem with. The normal “this is what I do” is fine. Even when it was the rapist before the head shaving, while I assume he wasn’t like “most def, get in there, girl,” he went along with it. Now that it’s clear that the rapist is a direct and violent threat toward Veronica in particular, it’s a different story. I think that Veronica is being particularly stubborn in this instance, and that most of her resistance to Logan comes not from ignorance of the threat, but from his demands. I think that in that area, he could have done better by starting with a constructive conversation about his fears and the logic behind them (look at me, talking about them like they wouldn’t need massive amounts of therapy to get to that point!) and relied on Veronica’s understanding and the self-preservation she has had in the past to take steps not to be such a target. However, once he has closed that avenue, as creepy as it is, I don’t think bodyguard was the worst way to go. Logan recognizes that it’s a violation of Veronica’s privacy and her trust. But as he says, “Look, I don’t give a rat’s ass if it’s right or fair. I don’t care if you’re angry. I care that you’re safe.” If this is the only way to do it, then he accepts that.

Logan knows how strong Veronica likes to appear. When she complains about the medicine at the end of 3x07, he doesn’t coddle her or sweet talk her into it. “Cowboy up, Mars,” he says. Logan does know who Veronica is, but I think he miscalculates here by trying to force her to drop the case. Based on her behavior in the past, I think that she could have been convinced to tread more lightly, or to cooperate with someone. But Logan is panicked. He just held a drugged and incoherent Veronica in his arms in what was apparently a near miss from further shaving if not worse. And he’s the only one who knows and the only one who’s willing to tell Veronica that she might need to back off. So she shuts down, shuts him out, and that makes him overcompensate and do something that makes Veronica angry.

Sweet children. You need such help.