This is why I pay Adobe $30 a month for Photoshop.
Pretty much all of these puns were made by the amazing @ace-pergers-pigeon. All of the art is by @disasterscenario, with the hopefully obvious exception of Miasma, which was drawn by me. (Why yes, I do go to art school. Glad you noticed the years of training that went into that painting.)
BTW if you want to print these out and give them to people for some reason, if you click on them to enlarge the original files are 4x6 at 300 dpi for your high quality low-res printing pleasure.