We mustn’t be overly cautious in love. The heart is a soft thing but that does not make it fragile. The heart can be beaten, battered, broken and bruised but given time will always return to its natural form. So charge in. Start taking risks. Get your heart’s hands dirty.
—  Beau Taplin // T h e  R o u g h  A n d  R e a d y  H e a r t
I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something. So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever.
—  Neil Gaiman

anonymous asked:

Can I request a C section instead of a vaginal delivery? I'm very early in my pregnancy so labor has not come up yet. I'm just terrified that I will tear because I have such a small pelvis and narrow vagina and I would much rather prefer a C section

I mean, you can request it, but I doubt you’ll get your request.  Cesarean sections are major abdominal surgery, and unless there is a health reason for you or the baby, there is no reason to subject both of you to that increased risk, pain, and prolonged healing time.

Some cesarean section facts for the birthing person:

  • First thing to know is that c-sections are lifesaving and vital in certain situations.  I am not against c-sections, I’m against unnecessary c-sections because of the facts you’ll read below.  For my patients who have a sudden emergency or other significant health problem, c-sections are amazing.
  • Blood loss during c-sections is, on average, 1000mL of blood, while in a vaginal birth it is commonly closer to 250mL, though somewhere between 100-500mL.
  • Infection is possible in any surgery, where it would not be possible in a vaginal birth since there is no incision to become infected.  Because of this, you will always be given at least 2 types of antibiotics (if not 3) administered through your IV during a c-section.  There is lots of research about how antibiotics during birth, though often necessary, can significantly disrupt the microbiome for your baby and increase risks for asthma, eczema, etc.
  • Injury can happen to your uterus, your other organs, or even your baby.  While this is uncommon, accidents can happen for a variety of reasons, and you can end up with an extra cut through your bladder, your ureter, an extra large cut in your uterus, or a cut to your baby.

Some cesarean facts for the baby:

Emotional concerns for the birthing person:

Healing & long-term effects on the birthing person:

Do cesarean sections protect against problems with the pelvic floor?

So, do elective cesareans make sense? NO.  There is no research to support choosing a cesarean section before labor begins for a non-medical reason.  It increases risks for everybody involved.  C-sections are vital in certain situations and I love working in a practice where I know and trust my MDs and can rely on them for life-saving cesareans at any time, but vaginal birth is ALWAYS the plan for my patients from the get-go.  There is no reason to suspect that your pelvis is “too small” for delivery unless you have had significant accident/surgery to your pelvis in the past.

Good luck!!!!  You’ll do great!!  And even if you DO end up with a cesarean delivery, you will know that your baby has better outcomes for having tried labor first.

If you’re going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don’t even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery–isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you’ll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you’re going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It’s the only good fight there is.
—  Charles Bukowski