rick lewis

Imagine Mark Watney, after many years of being indoors with no direct sun, feeling sun for the first time. I imagine it happens when he’s first out of quarantine, and the crew comes to visit him. I imagine he’s sitting there, staring at the sun, and somebody, maybe Johanssen, because for all her computer-ness she still knows what he wants, offers to move the party outside. Maybe Beck protests a little, but one of the doctors says it’s ok, he can go out, but he can’t walk out there, so mark sits in the wheelchair, and they roll him outside, and he just lets the sun hit his face, enjoying the warmth and the light, and breathing in fresh air and maybe someone (vogel) takes a picture of him. It doesn’t leave their phones, but the whole team has a pic of Mark basking in the sun, and they feel bad, Lewis especially, because in their minds, it’s their faults, they did this, but that pic reminds them that, regardless of what happened, they fixed it. They brought him home, and they have the picture to prove it.


It’s a strange feeling. Everywhere I go, I’m the first. Step outside the rover? First guy ever to be there! Climb a hill? First guy to climb that hill! Kick a rock? That rock hadn’t moved in a million years! I’m the first guy to drive long-distance on Mars. The first guy to spend more than thirty-one sols on Mars. The first guy to grow crops on Mars. First, first, first!

who you should fight, the martian
  • Mark Watney: for the love of god do not fight mark!!! what the fuck is wrong with you if you do wanna fight mark???? has this man not been through enough?? you should really just hug him and NOT FIGHT HIM
  • Melissa Lewis: u can try and fight the Commander but idk how well you'll come out of that. she's tipped 200 pound men out of their beds and also is badass naval officer. maybe for your own sake, don't fight Lewis
  • Rick Martinez: he might deserve a small fist fight. he makes awful jokes that deserve a punch every now and then. you could probably fight him and he'd laugh about it. he is also an air force guy so he has some training too. so watch out.
  • Chris Beck: it looks like u wouldnt wanna fight him but you should. mostly because deep down he enjoys it. as a doctor he knows just where to punch and hit so you will probably not fare well. and he probably likes to seem edgier than he actually is.
  • Beth Johanssen: NO FIGHTING THIS ADORABLE NERD. NO. she is an angel and u should be ashamed if you have ever wanted to fight Johanssen. And if u did Beck would hunt you down and fight you.
  • Alex Vogel: don't fight our lovable German. He is precious and needs to be protected. even tho im p sure Vogel could easily stand his own in a fight, just dont do it. save ur effort for fighting other people.
  • Teddy Sanders: fuck him up. just do it. go for it. let it all out. he sorta deserves it.
  • Mitch Henderson: probably also deserves to be fought. so I say do it. it'll be great actually and Sanders would thank you for it. To which you could then fight Sanders afterwards. maybe fight both of them at the same time actually.
  • Venkat Kapoor: you could get away with fighting Kapoor but only one time. he sorta deserves it for not telling the crew that Mark was alive. but that is it! no more! do not over fight Kapoor.
  • Annie Montrose: Fight her verbally. throw all the fucks and shits, goddamns that you can at her and she will still win i am sure of this. (Mark Watney might be her only true competitor)

“I have 700 students and a teaching staff that I’m responsible for every day. Don’t get on my case because one kid overreacted to some spilled paint.”

“Yeah, one kid who you personally spoke to twice in the past two days. But did you listen?!”