rich this is all your fault

4

Elizabeth made her way slowly home. Dawn could tell by her daughter’s face that something was wrong. 

Dawn: “Liz, what happened?”

Elizabeth: “It’s your fault. Max dumped me because you took away my money and it’s all your fault.”

Dawn: “Sweetheart you don’t want to be with a man like that any way.”

Elizabeth: “I do, that’s exactly the sort of man I want to be with. I want a happy marriage with lots of money.”

Dawn: “You don’t need to to marry someone rich to be happy, you do know that, right?”

Elizabeth: “Oh, you’re one to talk.”

Dawn: “Elizabeth, I did not marry your father for his money.”

Elizabeth: “Whatever. I’m going to Elsa’s she might actually be able to help me.”

Two is Better Than One (Roleplay with Senasmusebox)

Bucky had a pretty good life. He and his roommate Steve had finally finished setting up all their game systems on that stupid IKEA shelf they bought three months back (despite much bitching on Steve’s part), he had a great (and rich as fuck) Alpha boyfriend who liked to spoil him, and he had finally figured out why the microwave kept clicking when he passed it (his arm fucked with the cheap mechanics, apparently.)

Of course, good times in your life were usually God’s way of saying to hold on, because something was about ti bite you in the ass.

It was all Pepper’s fault, really. She had sworn up and down that Tony would be back from his business trip by Friday, in time for Bucky’s heat. Then that meeting had been cancelled, and this meeting had to be rescheduled, and that other person had dropped in the middle of a deal. Bucky didn’t mind. He knew things were crazy in Tony’s line of work. He was perfectly prepared to ride out his heat alone like he had for years. And any other time, Steve would have been fine with that. The Alpha was never anything but a gentleman during his heats, bringing him food and water, and running out for anything extra that came up.

It was just dumb fucking luck that Steve was on his rut at the same time as Bucky’s heat this time around. Any other time, he would have been able to control himself. But when he walked home to smelling a needy, unmarked omega, his instincts had taken over. And Bucky was there with him every step of the way, right up until the end, when he woke up with a horrible knot in his stomach, and an ache from a Bondmark on his throat.

Fuck.

And that was what led him to now, sitting silently on the couch as Tony and Steve went at it, having no idea what to do or say to any of this.

anonymous asked:

you never know what's happening on the driver's side, so don't ever criticize it. it's not right to drive like that, and nothing justifies it, but you've no right to judge and be an asshole straight forward without even knowing a thing

You may see me as an asshole, but you can’t defend someone who broke a law by drunk driving and killing a person in the process. Now if the driver wasn’t driving at all, my friend wouldn’t be dead and I will feel remorse for whatever they’re going through. But guess what, they broke a law and ended killing someone all because the driver was intoxicated. I don’t care if they were going through a rough time when it happened, (Even though they will have a rougher time in prison) you don’t drive while intoxicated PERIOD. It is their fault my friend died and yet you call me the asshole? How rich. Check your morals anon because you have them messed up. Also sure I don’t know a thing about that person, but right now I could care less about their dilemma. Oh and don’t you even dare say that I don’t have a right to judge, in fact I have a very good reason to judge and that is all based on the drunk driver’s actions. So before you even reply anon, check yourself to make sure you sound rational.

And here we have it.

The Great Misunderstanding™

See, because while Adrien is trying to get the gum OFF the chair, it looks, to be fair, like he’s SMEARING it because he is because he was never taught to use paper or a penny to get rid of gum because he’s a little rich boy who has never had to clean up after himself.

She is so appalled y’all.

THE FUCK IS GOING ON

and Alya also looks like she’s about to be sick from the thought of yucky old gum.

SO many perfect facial expressions.

Memo

To: Toni Bevell and the rich, snooty pricks who sent her*

Re: The Winchesters’ culpability, or lack thereof, in the supernatural catastrophes of the last decade or so

The Apocalypse

Not their fault. They played a part, but it was one that angels and demons had orchestrated for them for millennia.

Do you really mean to tell me that a bunch of rich people bursting with their own self-importance wouldn’t have been fifty times more susceptible to angels showing up and telling them they had a vital part to play in saving the world?

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

And, speaking of saving the world, that’s what the Winchesters did. Mostly Sam, but Dean helped I guess.

Eve

Not their fault. Monsters did that, and Sam and Dean took care of it anyway.

The Leviathan

Not their fault. It was all Cas and Crowley; mostly Cas, really. But again, the Winchesters cleaned up the mess. Where were your snooty asses while they were doing that, hmm?

Abaddon

Not their fault. Not even Henry’s fault–she’s the one who attacked him and the other Men of Letters. And at the end of the day she was still just one demon.

The Fallen Angels

Not their fault. That was Cas and Metatron. This plot was dumb so I’m having trouble remembering exactly what the Winchesters’ involvement in it was, other than Dean’s fight with Metatron. I think ultimately it was more Cas and Hannah who actually got the angels back into heaven? Eh.

The Darkness

OK, yes, that was kind of their fault. Mostly Dean’s fault, frankly, because he’s the one who took on the Mark of Fucking Fratricide without stopping to think about all the reasons that that was a terrible idea. And Sam was doing the best he could with the information he had when he used the Book of the Damned to cure the Mark, which he wouldn’t have had to do if Dean hadn’t gotten it in the first place. Or which he might have hesitated to do if God had left better warning labels.

In conclusion, take your entitled attitude and shove it up your ass, because Sam and Dean didn’t ask to have this big destiny and an angel friend who constantly makes terrible decisions, but they’ve done the best they can** and literally saved the world, so unless you’re gonna aim it at something that needs hunting, put your gun down and go away.

*In fact, mostly to the pricks, because for now I’m choosing to blame them for giving her bad information.

**I have many Dean-related caveats to that statement, but that’s not what this post is about so I’m not gonna get into it.

Frederik And The Sign

Aries - Always Wanting War And Blood Shed, Honorable Bunch, Much Respect Of 

Taurus - Hungry For Dramatics. The Stuntiest Stunts Ever Preform Most By Thems

Gemini - …Passing On

Cancer - Fault In These Star

Leo - Manes Spun Either Of Shiny Gold Or Rich Iron

Virgo - Me

Libra - Stop Weighing My Possessions

Scorpio - Do Not Mix With The Lion. Water And Fire Always Fighting

Sagittarius - You Make Much Sound When You Walks Around The Town In Your New Shoes You So Proud Of. Frederik Understand 

Capricorn - Always Most Attractive Of Friend Group. Mysterious, Do Not Ask Of Them Questions, They Exude Airs

Aquarius - For Reasons Him Not Know These Work Frederik Nerve The Most. Stop Hoarding All The Water Yous An Air Sign

Pisces - Red Fish Blue Fish One Fish Two Fish

The Classy Issue X Captain Franco Mixtape

TRACKLIST
01. Post Malone - Tear$
02. Lil Durk - Like Me feat. Jeremih
03. Ty Dolla $ign - Say No More
04. A$AP Rocky - L$D
05. K Camp - Something Outta Nothing
06. Skeme - 36 Oz
07. Chinx - Numbers feat. Meet Sims
08. Ty Dolla $ign - Blasé feat. Future & Rae Sremmurd
09. Earth Gang - Friday (The F Bomb Remix) feat. OG Maco
10. Jeremih - Planes feat. J Cole
11. Jhonni Blaze - Ride Or Die feat. Fetty Wap
12. Boosie Badazz - All I Know feat. PJ
13. Travi$ Scott - Anidote
14. Rich Homie Quan - All Around The World
15. Logic - Top Ten feat. Big K.R.I.T
16. Jay Rock - Money Trees Deuce
17. Big Sean - All Your Fault feat. Kanye West
18. ​Young Thug, Rich Homie Quan & Birdman - Up Up And Away
19. Tory Lanes - In For It

Mixed By: https://soundcloud.com/captainfranco

Made with SoundCloud
ANGEL WITH A SHOTGUN-PIETRO MAXIMOFF MINI FIC

Hope you guys like this one! Song is Angel with a Shotgun by The Cab.


Get out your guns, battle’s begun.

Are you a saint or a sinner?

If love’s a fight then I shall die

With my heart on a trigger.

“Ah, you are coming? I did not know Stark ran a babysitting service.” Pietro’s thick Sokovian accent rang out through the room as you zipped your leather boots, gritting your teeth.

“Can you keep your damn mouth shut for once? The last thing I need is your shit right now.” You scoffed, feeling the faint tingling of electricity in your palms.

Stay calm…

“And how is it my fault that you cannot handle an insult? You never had to deal with that, did you? Growing up in some rich family and spoiled your entire life- and look what all that privilege did to you.” Pietro sneered, and the knife you had been holding clattered to the ground.

“Who do you think you are? You know nothing about me. Nothing. Look, I get you had a shitty life and all, but it doesn’t give you the right to be a pretentious asshole when I’ve done nothing to you. And who are you to judge me? To act as if you know what I’ve been through? You’ve crossed a line, Pietro.”

Furiously wiping at your eyes, you prayed to whatever god there was (Thor included) that you wouldn’t start crying. Natasha cleared her throat from beside you, knowing where this was going. You raised a hand to silence her.

“No, he should know. You think you know who I am? An orphan, raised in the mutant ward of a “rehabilitation” hospital. Parents killed in a raid when they refused to hand me over to the anti-mutant agency after me. I was three months old, but I had already showed my powers by playing with lightning bolts like stuffed animals in my cradle. They wanted to make an example out of me.” You spat out, your tone turning more sad than angry as your glare shifted to the floor.

 Your voice softened, eyes fogging with tears.”I grew up thinking that my parents had put me in there, but the truth was infinitely worse. Electric shock testing started at the age of two, and then they tore my mind apart as soon as I learned to talk. Tell me, have you ever been unmade, Pietro? To never be conscious long enough to think of yourself as person, let alone who you were or could be? I was tortured for eighteen years, and didn’t see the sunlight until Natasha and Clint broke me out. So yes, I feel terrible for you and your sister, Pietro, I really do- but as you can see, my sympathy only goes so far. I’m not asking you to pity me. I pity you, because you have used your suffering to make your actions of hatred validated. Well, I am here to tell you that your trials do not make you a hero- how they have shaped you do. And you are a disgrace, and you cannot hurt me.”

And you cried. You cried so hard that you didn’t even think to look back as you bolted out of the room.

But if you did, you would’ve seen the self-disgust and shame engraved upon Pietro’s face, the tears streaming down his face as well.

If you did, you might have not have found yourself in the shape you were in three hours later.

They say before you start a war,

You better know what you’re fighting for.

Well, baby, you are all that I adore.

If love is what you need, a soldier I will be.

“Coffee?” The last voice you could have possibly wanted to hear in that moment whispered quietly, setting down the black mug on the table in front of you.

Your knees were drawn to your chest, arms locked around them as you sat statue-still on the low blue couch on the rooftop. You felt Pietro sit beside you, but couldn’t bother to speak.

“I did not know.” He told you quietly several minutes later, almost as if he was afraid to shatter the fragile silence that had fallen upon the two of you. You had always seemed like steel to him, but in that moment you were glass- and he was terrified of breaking you.

“Even if I did not have the past that I did, your actions would still be uncalled for.” You added, voice croaky as if it was an engine that had not been run in years trying to sputter back to life. Pietro cringed.

“What did I ever do to you?” You asked, no malice in your tone. Just curiosity, and the faintest undertones of sadness.

“You? Everything. You were perfect, and unattainable, and I knew it. I think I convinced myself that I could only ever get your attention by mocking you, pissing you off.” Pietro sighed.

“And I was a fool. I did not understand just how deep my words could hurt you. I realize now that I have a acted little better than the men I swore to my mother I would never be like. I know my apology will mean little, but I will apologize regardless of that.”

A stray tear slipped from you eye as you stared at the constellations above you.

“And I know that I sound like those awful men in trashy romances that expect you to run into their arms simply because they admitted that they were wrong, and how they were only mean to you because they liked you, but I also hope that you do no misinterpret me. I do not expect or want any of that. All I want is a chance to be friends with you, to make up for my mistakes.”

You were silent, and Pietro realized that while you were vulnerable in that moment- he was as well.

Because, whether you knew it or not, You had Pietro Maximoff’s heart in your palm.

“I think I’d like that, to be friends with you.”

I’m an angel with a shotgun,

Fighting ‘til the war’s won,

I don’t care if heaven won’t take me back.

I’ll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe.

Don’t you know you’re everything I have?

And I wanna live, not just survive tonight.

“This is the worst coffee I have ever tasted, Remind me why we came here again?”

“Because you thought the donuts in the window looked pretty.” Pietro smiled at you, sipping his coffee while trying not to frown at the bitter taste.

Over two years had passed since that night on the rooftop, and things had gotten better from there. You two had developed a healthy friendship, and while Pietro had loved you from the very beginning, you had grown to love him as well.

There was only one thing holding you back. 

Yourself.

You were terrified of getting romantically involved with him, due to your fear of losing him. You were a superhero after all, and your career offered a certain instability that didn’t necessarily guarantee that either of you would be safe. You’d lost so much in your lifetime, and you couldn’t bear to lose him as well.

How dangerous it would be to finally have something worth losing.

“They were quite pretty, but I think I’ll have to pass. This coffee just ruined my appetite. How about we head over to Rockefeller Center to see the tree?” You chirped excitedly. The tree had always been your favorite part about christmastime in New York, and with December 25 only a few days away, you wanted to relax after a day full of Christmas shopping.

Ten minutes later, you two found yourselves on skates beneath the tree. You were flawless on them, twirling and making patterns on the ice, while Pietro lumbered helplessly after you, unable to stay upright for more than a few moments at a time.

You took pity on him, helping him to his feet and guiding him about the rink. In no time he had it, but you two were still connected by the hand as you continued to skate across the ice.

The two of you skidded to halt in front of the tree, and you couldn’t help but admire the lovely couples in positions similar to yourself, while Pietro only had eyes for you.

You turned back to look at Pietro, and caught him staring at you. He blushed bright red, and you softened, squeezing the hand he was holding lightly.

You took a deep breathe, ignoring the war-zone your mind had become. “Pietro?” You asked, sounding a lot more confident than you were.

“Hm?” He hummed in reply, looking back at you.

“Merry Christmas, Speedy.” You whispered, connecting your lips with his in a kiss that left you both helplessly breathless.

He pulled away first, the grin on his face reminding you of christmas morning and birthdays.

“God, I love you.” He whispered with a laugh as his forehead rested against yours, and you smiled back at him as your fingers went up the play with his hair.

“I love you too.” You grinned, kissing him once more.

Yes, love was often portrayed as instantaneous and kind, but love was also patience and determination. It was apologies, hard work, and knowing that sometimes you must admit you are wrong. Love is an infinite spectrum of truths and lies, and if you knew no others- you knew that love contained Pietro Maximoff.

The signs as Donald Trump quotes

Aries:  “I cannot say I have to respect the person who is not me.”

Taurus:  “You’re fired.”

Gemini:  “You know the funny thing, I don’t get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than I get along with the rich people.”

Cancer: “I’ve always had a great relationship with the blacks.”

Leo:  “All of the women on ‘The Apprentice’ flirted with me – consciously or unconsciously. That’s to be expected.”

Virgo:   “Sorry losers and haters, but my I.Q. is one of the highest — and you all know it! Please don’t feel so stupid or insecure, it’s not your fault.”

Libra:  “Let me tell you, I’m a really smart guy.”

Scorpio:  “My fingers are long and beautiful, as, it has been well been documented, are various other parts of my body.”

Sagittarius:   “… of course, it’s very hard for them to attack me on looks, because I’m so good looking.”

Capricorn:  “The beauty of me is that I’m very rich.”

Aquarius:  “As everybody knows, but the haters and losers refuse to acknowledge, I do not wear a 'wig.’ My hair may not be perfect but it’s mine.”

Pisces: “Only Rosie O’Donnell”

  • Jesus: "The poor are the ones who inherent the kingdom of God, the rich should give to the poor, if you have money and don't share it with those less fortunate you won't go to Heaven"
  • Republicans: "This money is all mine and if you don't have money its your fault for not working hard enough. I shouldn't have to share my hard earned money with you lazy poor people. Go God!!"
So let me get this straight. ...

A bored 73 yr old man who has nothing better to do with his life, gets to tag along on ride alongs- because he’s rich and y'all need his money- is “ a volunteer”- yet somehow has deputy status, like explain how that works to me- shoots an unarmed blackman.

Meanwhile, the actual deputy basically says it’s your fault for running, claims to be unaware that he was shot- even though he’s yelling that he’s been shot. And then tells him that his life doesn’t matter.

But you know, it was all just one big ol “mistake”.

The saddest part for me is that if it weren’t caught on video, we never would have even known his name.