Beloved, banish the thought that you have to be good enough before you will come to Him. It will never happen. You can’t be ‘good enough’ without the One who has made you good, who has justified you, and who has freed you from sin. Enjoy Jesus Christ right now– listen to songs about His love, just tell Him everything honestly, remind yourself of His goodness. He does not condemn you.
In case you’ve forgotten, beloved: God loves you fully— insecurities, secrets, shame, and all. He loves you and wants you to just come to Him. Realize that you can stop bending yourself backwards for peace and acceptance. All that you can need— they’re all found in Him, and He will give them to you. Just draw closer.