When you realize your friends are in the illuminati

on the first day of school
  • teacher:so tell the class a little bit about yourself
  • me:Hey hey hey HEYYYY Put cha lighter’s up! Ganja’s in the house!!! ow ! As you can tell from my accent I am from Dallas, Tex-ass! And it was not very easy growing up looking like this ! Whether I was playing in my grandma’s clothes or putting on a show for my well-organized alphabetically-ordered beanie babies, I was guh guh guh GAY! Okaaaay! But it wasn’t until I moved to Los Angeles that I discovered Marijuana, I mean I like to smoke, y’all I am just flying as high as your receding hairline! OKAY! Marijuana really does help me calm down, so y’all, I went to Valencia where they film the TV show Weeds! Now, y’all, it’s very dry, it’s almost kinda like your vagina! Can I get an amen?!? Now y’all, I am a treehugger because if it ain’t green, HUH I’m not interested! OKCURRRRRRRR!
Champion Reveal: Illaoi, the Kraken Priestess

Illaoithe Kraken Priestess

Most champions arm themselves with swords or guns or magic or whatever, but Illaoi’s bringing a freakin’ god to the Rift. One of the new breed of juggernauts, she’s a slow but impactful solo laner in any game, with tentacles that offer huge zone control once they worm their way into a game. And while she lacks traditional gap closers to start fights, she can pull the spirits from distant squishies and destroy them, rendering yet another vessel for Illaoi’s god, Nagakabouros.

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Dean Winchester Smut- Revealed

A/N- something about Dean pulling you back for more, I just n o p e *this is only half edited, so excuse me mistakes*

     “Truth or dare?” Dean looked at you from the edge of his bed. “What are we, twelve?” You let out a light chuckle before you caved in. “Fine..” Rolling your eyes at his childish ways, you spun around in the chair you had brought in. “Alright, truth or dare?” Dean watched you spin intently, a moment of silence falling over you two before your reply. “Truth.” Looking over at him, his smile faded. “Of course. Alright, what’s your biggest secret?” His expression looked bored but you knew he wouldn’t be when you told him. 

   “Uh.. Well..” A smile came to your face as you looked in his eyes. “I used to be a porn star.” Letting out a slight giggle at your past, you looked at Dean. As soon as the words fell from your lips, he had grabbed the laptop next to him and started typing. “What, you don’t think I’m lying?” You got up from the chair, walking over to him slowly. “I’m not risking it..” Dean was content with his typing, his eyes scanning the screen. “Dean Winchester, are you attracted to me?” Right as you said it, you reached out and closed the laptop on him. “Of fucking course I am..” Dean looked straight in your eyes as you leaned down, placing your hand on his chin and pulling him up to slowly kiss him. 

    Smiling into the kiss, you started to walk back to the door and leave him with his dirty thoughts, but he stopped you. A hand was placed on your hip, holding you. “Hold up, get your ass back over here..” You smirked to yourself, loving his dominance. “Is that a question or a demand?” You turned around slowly, but Dean had other plans. 

   His movements were fast, bringing you to stand between his legs before pulling you down. He was hungry for you, he was savoring your taste in a way you could only describe as practiced. You kissed him back immediately, but his hunger took over as his hands came down your lower back to your ass. As Dean’s hands fondled your ass, he pulled you forward, a signal to have you straddle him. More than willing, you got on top of him, removing your lips to kiss along his jaw line.

    Dean’s stubble was rough on your soft lips, just the right amount of friction to send your core throbbing, dripping for touch. “Dean..” You groaned as you began to travel to his neck, kissing and sucking, ultimately just marking your territory. “This is mine..” Dean was growling possessively as his hand came around you to cup your core through your jeans. Moaning in agreeance, you bit his neck lightly, earning him to slowly tease you by rubbing you through your jeans. 

    “Tell me who you belong to..” Dean pulled your face from his, looking into your eyes. His green ones had glazed over with lust, just begging you to help him reach his high. “Yours..” You practically melted under his finger tips as he removed his hand from rubbing you and placed it at your knee. Pushing it up, when he got to your shirt, he grabbed the hem, but your hands grabbed his wrist. Kissing him fast, you kept eye contact as you antagonizingly slowly pulled the cloth over your head. revealing your smooth skin. 

   “God you’re beautiful…” Dean’s eyes ran up and down your torso as you reached behind your back, undoing your bra clasp and throwing it on the floor. His large hands were holding your rib cage as you began to slowly grind down on him, earning a few throaty moans. “Y/N..” The noise was music to your ears as it rang out, his mouth coming down to suck on your chest, his hands coming up to cup your breasts. Letting your head fall back, your lips were slightly parted, letting small, breathy moans out. 

    “Dean please…” Your hands came up to fist hist hair, tugging lightly. Before you could think twice, Dean picked you up, turning you around and setting you on the bed. The cold sheets made a mix of temperature as he began to strip, his shirt going first. Watching in aw, the second he was naked, you put your arms out, reaching for him. Reaching for him to make you feel wanted, reaching for him to pull and feel you. 

    Wasting no time, Dean hurried to get on the bed, his hips resting between your legs. Delving down, he kissed you, your lips moving in perfect synchronization together. “Please..” A begging mess, you thrusted your hips up, grinding your denim clad core on his bare cock. Removing one hand from holding himself up, it came down to hold your hip, pushing you into the mattress. 

   Hands wandering your body, you became impatient with him, running your hands down your front to undo your jeans. Realizing your rushed behavior, Dean did the favor for you, pulling them down your legs, your panties right after. The hot air of the room ran across your heat,your legs twitching slightly. Kissing you once again, Dean’s hand wrapped around his cock, slowly stroking it before he placed it in your folds, running it up and down.

   Spreading your wetness, Dean continued to tease, pressing hit tip against your clit, rubbing a few slow circles.A moaning mess, you kept your legs wide open, waiting for him to enter. As if to read your mind, Dean lined himself up before pushing deep into your tight walls.

    “Holy fucking shit…” You groaned in unison with Dean as he began to thrust slow but deep. Without fail, he hit your g spot every time, your legs shaking as he did. Wrapping your legs around his hips, you focused on the way his thick length stretched and filled you, your walls tight to sheath him. “Fuck, Y/N..” Dean’s head came down, kissing your lips slowly with hist thrusts. 

   Pulling out for a mere second, Dean brought his wet length up, slapping it on your slit before he entered you again. “God dammit…” Your back arched as you felt your high come close. Gripping Dean’s shoulders, you felt him twitch inside you as you clenched, your nails running down his back. Before you could reach release, Dean stopped for a minute, pulling out. Glaring at him, you caught your breath. “You did not.” He smirked in response, your hand coming up to his chest, pushing him on his back. 

       His smirk never faded as he watched you throw a leg over his waist, sitting yourself on top of him. Rubbing slowly, his cock settled between your slit, your wetness running up and down his shaft as you ground on him. Now the moaning mess, Dean’s head was back, his eyes shut as his hands squeezed harshly on your thighs. 

      You let his cock head hit your entrance before you moved expertly to let him slip inside. Dean groaned at the sensation, his breath hitching. Slowly, you began to move, letting him slip in and out with ease. Your high came faster, approaching almost immediately. Moaning loudly, it echoed through the room as you clenched around him tightly, your cum spilling down his shaft, dripping onto the sheets. “Fuck F-Fuck…” Dean noticed your exhaustion, taking over, thrusting up in your core fast. He was racing to his high, having to slow down to catch his breath momentarily. Twitching one last time, Dean’s seed was hot inside you, your body falling limp on top of him. 


   Adjusting your breasts in your bra, you watched as Dean surfed through the videos of you that you had pulled up for him. “That was seriously the best sex I’ve ever had…” You smiled at him from where he was on the bed, still naked. “You keep saying that..” You looked away, glancing up fast to see Dean staring intently at your body. “Again?”