retail-probs

“I don’t have the receipt, can I still return this?”

“Don’t you have any more of these in the back?”

“I want to speak to the manager!”

“Oh I’m not going to buy anything, I’m just looking!”

“I know you’re about to close, but I just need one thing!”

“It didn’t scan, it must be free!”

Dear customers:

If you’re going to try on a bunch of things in the fitting rooms and think you’re being helpful by hanging it up but inside out… no you’re not. I’d rather you leave them on the floor. That being said however PLEASE HANG UP YOUR CLOTHING PROPERLY ANYWAYS. Trust me you will get better service if you do.

Sincerely, 

A retail worker.

You ever have those customers that are so nice, they’re sweet as fuck and you have no problem helping them because they’re treating you the way you should be treated? But once you say something they don’t like, like “we don’t have this medication in stock” they turn into a demon and their head spins and they start cussing you out? And you’re like “Damn, Margaret! I thought we were friends?” But they just proved you wrong like chill bitch I can order it for you!

The Customer Isn't Always Right

During my time working customer service, I’ve figured out one surefire way to deny a customer’s request without them getting angry at me.


Customer: Excuse me, if I buy this and this do you give me this for free? They’re all so expensive. I shouldn’t have to pay full price! *turns into firebreathing dragon*
Me: Ohh no unfortunately we don’t *sad face* that would be really awesome if we did though!
Customer: *turns back into human* Yes it would. Glad you agree with me.

Customer: It’s my daughter’s birthday. Do you have a a hidden cake down there behind your register to give her for free because it’s her birthday?!
Me: Ohh no unfortunately we don’t *sad face* that would be really awesome if we did though! 
Customer: Right? 

Customer: If I stay here long enough after closing hours do you all start singing and dancing?
Me: Ohh no unfortunately we don’t *sad face* that would be really awesome if we did though!

Those were obviously a little out there, but you get my point!  I say this to at least 5 people a day. 

What’s your best way to turn down customers without fearing for your life?

s/o to all the customers who don’t even look at you when you ask how they’re doing, the ones who slide their cards before you’ve rung up their first item, the ones who ask to speak to the manager because no, you cannot discount their purchase just because it’s their birthday