resilience thinking

some think my positivity and outlook is fake, but it isn’t. not even close. the reality is i REFUSE to let myself feel empty for too long and i absolutely refuse to allow hurt to control me. while yes it’s important to work through emotions and let them pass entirely, there simply is no reason to allow negativity to linger. it serves me no purpose because each time i’m close to being broken, i’m reminded that i’m so much stronger and i can always learn something valuable. it’s an active choice to be resilient and i think it’s a beautiful quality that i posses.

Bee’s Modest Art Arsenal

I made a comprehensive list of all the stuff I typically use to make art as of right now. It’s not meant to be an end-all-be-all for art supplies by any means, just… stuff I like! And it’s largely affordable whenever possible, yay!!! Some of my favorite art products I find completely on accident or in unlikely places so never be afraid to give it a shot if it calls to you! My list is under the cut, and ofc, all photos are not mine and used purely for educational purposes.

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The Babysitter’s Club: Tim and the Toddler

A fic for @komadoriwonder​ .
Set in Cor Et Cerebrum Continuity and a follow up to “Jason’s Gots Kids?” 

Rated: G
Gen/Family Bonding
Characters: Tim Drake, Jason Todd, Isaac Wayne, Damian Wayne, Kiran Devabhaktuni
6463 words
AO3 Link Here

**

The Babysitter’s Club: Tim and the Toddler

The ceiling fan whirs slowly above the bed while Tim stares at it and holds his cellphone to his ear.

“But why me?” he asks, in a voice that sounds too close to whining for his own comfort. “I don’t know what to do with a baby.”

“He’s not a baby. He’s three,” Jason answers. “And he likes you.”

This point seems feeble to Tim.

“Isaac likes everyone. What am I supposed to do with him? Why can’t Alfred watch him?”

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chandlergracecarlson  asked:

Do you have any tips of self love and confidence

About to get a little personal here. Nbd. 

For me personally, I think self love/confidence is one of those things that comes with time. I also think it’s not one of those ultimate, tangible end goals. It’s something that has periods of ups and downs throughout our lives and is constantly changing in one way or another. There have been periods of my life where I have felt a lack of confidence in certain areas of my life and with specific aspects of myself. There have been other periods where things have felt perfect, and I have felt content and confident. I think in life, confidence is not one of those concrete things that is like “yay! I am confident now about everything and that will never, ever change”. I think it’s so normal to have periods throughout our life where we feel uncertain and unconfident about something or multiple things. I think it’s also normal to feel periods of confidence and to allow yourself to feel proud of your achievements. Our society has kind of made it to where it’s ‘cool’ to hate on yourself, but I personally think confidence is one of the most important things we can find and feel. It encourages us to reach for our dreams and to take crazy chances and to block the negative things that may come our way. It keeps us pushing us forward and it allows us to really be ourselves, without concern of what others may think or say. Confidence is incredibly important and special, so don’t let anybody tell you otherwise. 

When we feel unconfident about ourselves or our lives, I think it can really help to just take some time to reflect. Why are we unhappy? What is keeping us from not feeling confident? Are these things that we can fix? For example, I did not feel confident about my body after my freshman year of college. I gained about 15 pounds (which is a lot when you are 5′0-5′1″), and I didn’t feel like ‘me’, physically. For years, I kind of brushed it off, not willing to dive in and make any actual changes. However, about eight or nine months ago, I started working out and lifting weights. I also started to be mindful about the things I put into my body, and I adopted a more balanced diet along with giving up alcohol. I lost about 10-15 pounds last semester, and I feel confident with my body again. I feel confident wearing denim shorts and jeans, for the first time since high school. I feel proud of the lifestyle changes I have made, and I am happy that I took a proactive approach to solving that problem, as minuscule as it may seem in the grand scheme of life. If you have something in your life that is draining your confidence, figure out if there is a solution to fix it. If you are struggling in a class and it is getting you down, try to see if there is a way to improve and solve that specific problem. However, sometimes in our lives, we have sources of unhappiness that we can not change. In that case, we have to learn to love ourselves regardless of that ‘imperfection’ and to accept that somethings are just not in our control. Things in life aren’t always permanent, and things do get better (as cliche as it totally is)- whether it’s from the way life changes to the way our mindset changes. I think it’s important to realize that those ‘imperfections’ make us who we are; they make us special and unique. When we start to take those things we see as imperfections and start to see them as the qualities that make us who we are and unique, we feel more confident. We have to learn that we can’t control everything. There will be points of our lives where we feel frustrated and defeated over the things that are not in our control, but we have to learn to do the very best we can, while always keeping a positive, resilient attitude. 

I think when it comes to confidence, people tend to associate that with our physical appearance. But I feel like confidence can come from such a deeper place, and it can come from different areas of our life. For example, doing well academically in college really helped boost my overall confidence with myself and my life. I felt proud, and I felt confident when I achieved my personal academic goals and I could see the results of my hard work. Confidence doesn’t necessarily come from just the way we feel about our ‘outer shell’, but it comes from a combination of areas in our life from school/work, relationships, and personal goals. Speaking of personal goals, I find that setting personal goals for yourself can really help give confidence. Those goals can be tiny or huge; either way, they motivate us and give us confidence when we achieve them. Even when we fall short, we still can feel confident because we know we tried our hardest, learned something new, and experienced growth. I am a huge goal setter, and I firmly believe they are incredibly important for finding confidence.

In a world dictated by social media and filled with this immense pressure to be perfect, I think it’s important to take the time to realize that you don’t have to be perfect. It’s okay to make mistakes, and that those mistakes and imperfections don’t need to affect our confidence and our longterm views of ourself. At the end of the day, all we can do is be ourselves and do the very best we can. I think making a gratitude list can be very helpful. Write the things and people in your life that you are grateful for. Write the things you love about you! Recognize your talents and strengths. This is incredibly important. What matters most is how you feel about you, and I can promise you that you have strengths and skills. Throughout life, regardless of which path you choose, people will try to bring you down or tell you that you can’t do something. Don’t listen to them. Keep being you and doing the things in life that bring you the most joy. Speaking of people, reflect on the people in your life that you are surrounded by. Do they encourage you and make you feel confident or do they bring you down? I think it’s so, so essential to cleanse yourself of toxic people that are in your life. Surround yourself with positive, encouraging people that inspire you to be the best version of you. Some of my personal lows of confidence and happiness were when I was surrounded by negative, toxic friends that discouraged me from achieving my goals and brought me down. Now that I have an encouraging circle of people in my life, I feel more confident about achieving my goals and being myself unapologetically. It is better to be alone than in bad company, I can promise you that. Sometimes we have to be our biggest cheerleader and tell ourselves that we can achieve. 

Something I have learned about confidence throughout college is that we can help ourselves find confidence when we encourage others. Three to four years ago, I felt like the way I treated others at times was a reflection of my own insecurities and unhappiness. It becomes a negative cycle. When we are negative and hurtful and critical, we affect the people around us and our own level of confidence. Compliment others, find their strengths, be open minded, encourage your friends and family to achieve their dreams, be there for people in times of trouble, volunteer, and do positive things without any expectation of reward. I am a big believer in karma- especially good karma. When we do good, good things come. Even if you don’t feel content and confident, continue to encourage others and be a positive source in their life. Your sunshine and confidence will come in its own time. 

Lastly, I think it’s important to realize that everybody struggles with confidence at some point in their lives. Whether that struggle comes from body image to school to relationship troubles, we all have aspects of our life that cause us frustration and turmoil. We can choose to let those struggles defeat us or we can choose to let them motivate us to keep trying our best and striving towards the person we want to become. Find what makes you feel alive and what makes you joyful and confident. Never stop searching for those things and cling onto those positive sources when you find them. 

Sorry if that was a bit rambly and ridiculously long, but just my personal take on finding confidence. There is of course no perfect answer to finding confidence, but those are some things I have kind of reflected on throughout my journey with confidence the past few years :)

We’re all more resilient than we think, and that’s an indisputable truth. There is always more love that we are capable of giving, more hope that we are capable of having, more passion that we’re capable of unleashing and flooding out into the world. We just don’t walk far enough down our own roads to reach the point where we’re seeing those actions pay off.
—  Heidi Priebe
Hearts are made to be resilient. Think about it: Is there one thing that’s happened to you that you haven’t survived? Here you are, right now, reading this article despite all the heartache you’ve had in your life. Something in you is still awake, alive, eager to learn, ready to be moved. And once you know that your heart is resilient, once you accept that part of being here on earth is, as a friend of mine says, living among the brokenhearted, then you can take in the huge streaks of delight, joy, and happiness as well.
—  Geneen Roth

kaimalak  asked:

Show Me Some Love: Which character do you like that doesn't really get as much attention as they should?

of course my first answer is always going to be Breakdown because I truly and honestly think he got the shortest possible end of the stick there ever could be in TFP. like, how shorthanded he got was absolutely ridiculous tbh

I also think that Pipes could have gotten more love? ngl I think that he’s had one of the saddest if not the saddest death for me. he was such a hopeful, bright, and resilient character- i think he deserved more than what he got. 

Let’s Talk About Monty Green

Monty Green who forgave Jasper in season 1 for being an ego hungry jerk.  Even helped get his confidence back so he could shoot the bomb on the bridge.

Monty Green who had enormous faith in Clarke when he was in Mount Weather.  He was willing to leave the safety of the Mountain to go find her because he knew she would never abandon them.

Monty Green who made it possible for the Mountain to be irradiated even though he knew the consequences.

Monty Green who wouldn’t let Jasper collapse in on himself in season 3. 

Monty Green who was the only one to get through to Bellamy when he was breaking down about finding Clarke.

Monty Green who never denied the emotional struggle he was going through.

Monty Green who convinced Octavia to stay.

Monty Green who is like 16 years old and has more maturity than most of the delinquents. 

Monty Green who had the strength to kill his own mother (twice) in order to save those he loves.  

Monty Green who was stabbed by his best friend and STILL managed to forgive him and help save the world. 

Monty Green who wouldn’t let Raven face ALIE alone.

Monty Green who never asks for thanks.

Monty Green who is strong and loves his friends and family fiercely. 

Monty Green who truly embodies selflessness and strength. 

Monty Green who rarely if ever takes a moment for himself.

Monty Green.  

“We survive together.”

Originally posted by lightwoodsiblings

“I Love You” Calum Plus Size Series AU

Word Count: 2445

Warnings: Slight swearing, extremely vague mentions of sex

Requested: No


“I love you.”

Those words stuck to you like glue. You meant them. You truly, really meant them. It was hard though. You couldn’t find it in you to tell Calum. You were nothing more than a hookup to him, a series of one night stands and amazing nights. You considered him a best friend, and he felt the same way about you, but that was it. You were probably, through and through, just a best friend with some amazing benefits to him. Someone as amazing as him deserved so much more than that. He deserved someone that would love him unconditionally. In reality, he deserved you, and you knew it. And somewhere deep down, he knew it too.

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Ten Things I Wish I Knew When I Found Out I Was Cheated On

1. This is not your fault. It will never be your fault.

2. You are not worthless; do not feel like you are. Please.

3. Never underestimate the power of your best friend at this time. Have somebody be there for you right now.

4. Collect your thoughts before talking to the person who did this to you. Take your time. Even never talking to that person again is valid.

5. Don’t let anyone tell you what you should do or not do. This is your life, body and relationship, not theirs.

6. Don’t be afraid to call your mother or father during this time.

7. You are so beautiful.

8. Don’t feel foolish if you choose to go back. It is not pathetic. Trust me.

9. There will be hard roads ahead if you do choose to leave. You will struggle. You will cry. You will hurt. Please push through. You are more resilient then you think you are.

10. Always ask for help; people want to be there for you. You are loved.

A soft heart:


to begin, shed all preconceived notions of what softness is - of what it means to be soft, to live with softness nestled warm inside the hollow of your chest. 


think of softness not as weakness, nor brokenness, but as the opposite - resilience. think of softness as the bouncing back, as the gentle breath brewed in lungs sore from a) crying, b) sobbing, c) screaming, d) all of the above. think of softness as the sun behind the clouds, the calm after the storm, the picking up the pieces and making a new whole.


A soft heart:


Once upon a time a soft heart was broken. 
It was morning, and the soft heart woke with
tremors; a shift in the tectonic plates of the lungs,
a shaking in the ribs. Because the soft heart knew
something was missing that morning. The soft
heart ached from the tear down its middle, fresh 
and still bleeding into the chest, and the shaking
chest stung the eyes with tears and the body, small
and shaking, shed the covers and pulled the soft 
heart out of bed, dressed it in black, and brought
it to the church with the long, sleek casket bundled
with bouquets at the alter. It slid the heart into the
long black car and drove it to the green (hidden, 
that day, by gray and white of snow fallen two
days ago). It stood the heart at the edge of the earth
and the heart looked inside, looked down six feet
below the ground, watched the sleek casket dip
into the earth, watched the earth swallow it greedily
whole, and tossed a single rose. The soft heart felt
pieces flaking off, felt itself losing - something. 


But the soft heart lived. Lived on, and on. Lived
to be - 16 - 18 - 20 - 23. With a scar right down
the center and an ache on cold mornings. It is 
still soft. And its softness should not be thought
of as weakness. Because the soft heart as bleed,
has torn itself apart, has felt itself ripped in two,
and then three, and then four, and it grabbed to
the tattered pieces with white knuckles and forced
them back together again. The soft heart can conquer
queens, topple kingdoms, bring full armies to their
knees - and still be remain as it has always been -

—  soft. // april 13, 2017. ephemere 30/30. (l.v.) purchase “ready aim fire”. 

anonymous asked:

Hey Chris, I'm finally running with my team again (recovering from injury) but I'm so terrified every time I run now. I'm terrified that my old injury is going to start hurting again, or that I'm going to trip and hurt my ankle (like what happened last time). It's hard to enjoy running as much because I'm just so damn scared. Any tips?

Hi beautiful. I totally get this. When I was out for a really long time because of knee pain, I was TERRIFIED to start running again. However, you have to go on despite the fear you feel. You have to have faith that you rested, you did your proper recovery/rehab for it, and most importantly– have faith in your body. You are stronger and more resilient than you think :) It’s kind of like anything in life– car crashes happen every day but we can’t just stop driving…food poisoning happens every day but we can’t just stop eating…there are always things to fear but we can’t let that stop us from DOING and LIVING. Take it slow and steady :) And use your teammates for support! You are ready!

The problem with the conventional definition of “adulthood” is that it conflates a set of healthy traits (self-directedness, planning for the future, emotional resilience, analytical thinking) with a set of neutral-or-unhealthy traits (conforming to societal norms, restraining one’s emotional expressiveness, valuing beauty over cuteness). 

I want the healthy traits of adulthood. I want to set goals and execute plans; I want to remain resilient in the face of stress; I want to think carefully and analytically about my decisions; I want to purposely and deliberately build a good life.

I also want to appreciate how cute my friends are; I want to overtly express affection and create happy interpersonal interaction; I want to enjoy physical touch and hugs and cuddles; I want to ignore social norms when obeying them would make my life worse.

Setting goals and executing plans makes me happy. Jumping up and down when I see something cute also makes me happy. Both of these things make my life better, so why would I want to get rid of either of them?