resenment

The High Lady

*English isn’t my native language, sorry for the mistakes*

Summary : Feyre is back to Spring court, Lucien wants to have some answers.

“He really loves you, you know. ”
Lucien’s voice was soft as he spoke to Feyre.
She’s been back for a few days now and he knew that she was lying to them, about the bond and all that happened at the Night Court. This night Tamlin was out meeting Ianthe, even if he said it was just to check on some war thing. He was lying to him too. Short after Calanmai the High Lord began to put him aside. The priestess was nowhere to be seen but Lucien knew she was still pulling the strings.
This afternoon he had caught Feyre snicking in the office. He was about to yell at her when she reminded him about Elain. She was pulling her own strings too, and he was one of her puppet. The emissary didn’t had time to answer before a guard came to asks after him somewhere else in the domain. Feyre played her part, she was just missing her fiance so she came to that room, perfect as always.
He came back late, dinner was over. So he headed to Feyre’s room, where he found her gazing mindlessly at the stars from the balcony. A smile on her face showed him she knew he was there and he took it as an invitation to come. Now he was sitting against the stone rail, the alley on his back and the young woman at his left. He had look at her for a moment before speaking, her eyes betraying the memories running before it. Now she had close them and she released a deep breath before answering in a whisper.
“I know”.
“ Wasn’t he enough for you ? Did you really need to fall into his arms ?” He said, teeth clenched, anger coming back at him. She slammed her tongue.
“ You know that’s not what happened. You know what a mating bond is like.”
“ Yes, instantaneous. It snap in less than an instant.”
“ So you understand this has nothing to do about Tamlin being enough for me.”
“ No I don’t. You had met Rhysand right under my eyes. Nothing happened. I can understand your mortal condition could have delayed the bond. But then you made a deal with him. Magic was running into you through the tatoo. You should have known back then, I’m sure you knew. And yet you played with him. You played with me.”
His hands where white of all the resenment he felt. Lucien had suffured for her, under the mountain and after, because the cauldron had choose her for his friend. “Tamlin loves her and she loves him, Prythian is saved by their love and everything gets better.” he was thinking. At least at Spring Court, for them. But then he came in the equation. Rhysand. Lucien had seen him play with Feyre at those parties, he had seen the desire in his eyes when the dark High Lord was out of amarantha’s grip. Back then he thought it was only jealousy, the same old rivality between the Night and Spring. He even put a bet on her on the first trial ! Then there was that last night were Tamlin had try to have some moment with Feyrebefore the last trial. Rhysand had taken advantage of it. At last it was what Lucien thought this night, that his human friend, Feyre Cursebreaker, had had to deal with it to save them all.
A few weeks before now he had try to get her back to where she belong, to the man she was about to marry and far away from Amarantha’s whore. He didn’t understand why she wouldn’t change her mind, why she tried to throw him back to Tamlin, empty handed. She was suppose to be her friend.
And then at Hybern they all understood. Feyre and Rhysand where mates. Lucien had seen the last few months playing again in his head and he came to this conclusion : she knew about the bond and yet she played along with Tamlin, certainly rhysand’s plan and her wickzed side she had been good at hidding.
She was supposed to be his friend and she let him down. To Amarantha’s hands because Rhysand was certainly a stronger ally. To Ianthe’s, faking to not know what she was trying to do with him. To Tamlin’s anger and violence because she had fooled them all. Now he was like a bird eating on her hand because he had been stupid enough to voice the bond between him and Elain. Now he was hurt and didn’t knew who to turn to.

A hand took one of his fist, gently holding it. He turned to see the face of a traitor but he only found concern on gentle eyes, as was her voice.
“ I’m sorry I had let you alone all this time. I could say I was broken, that I needed time, or something else. But the fact is I had no excuse. We both let down the other, we both stopped to fight. I was broken, now I’m healing.”
His hands eased slightly at the tone, at the honesty he could see throught his golden eye. She took his fingers between her hands and looked back at the sky for a moment before adding.
“ You are right, there was a bond between Rhys and me back then. But not this kind, it was just the deal. As you said, being a human kind of stopped the mating bond, and the bargain was just a step ahead. But we didn’t knew. He understood only few hours after Amarantha’s death, and he said nothing. He knew I was in love with Tamlin and was ready to let me go. I had loved Tamlin, this wasn’t a lie. But something has changed, I was different. At the wedding Rhys didn’t kidnap me as some like to say, he saved me. I was about to say no and beging with all my heart for someone to get meout of here. He didn’t force me to anything, he didn’t used me as a price.”
She invited him, with a silent nod, to seat next to her. Lucien did, but he wasn’t convinced. She continued.
“ Rhys didn’t even tell me about the bond. The Suriel did. And I was mad at him because of it. I didn’t knew where i was exactly with Tamlin, where I was going with Rhys.” Lucien was still suspicious but she needed another ally.
“ The cauldron choose you for my sister and we were once friends, so I’m gonna tell you a secret.”
Lucien tensed at Elain’s mention and his mind was wondering about that secret. Feyre turned up her sleeves so he can see the bare skin of her arms. They were both blank of ink, as he expected. But then a tatoo appeared on one of them. He looked at her, eyes wide, as she answered his silent question.
“The night before Hybern, Rhys and I went to a priestess. To certified the bond.”
He knew how it works, a priestess use a spell to bless the bond. The tatoo wasn’t an obligation, but something common among fae. It is louder than a ring when it comes to say “Mine”. For an instant he was back to the Autumn Court, his mate smiling at him as they were thinking their own blessing they were about to take the next night, and then leave the court. His heart sank. He couldn’t have protect her, his brothers had found her few hours later. And now, somewhere in Prytrian there was another woman, another mate for him, another one he couldn’t protect. He came back to present as Feyre was pointing her brand new tatoo.
“ So he claimed you as his mate. Maybe be his wife ?”
“ He did, and didn’t. This night he claimed me as his equal. He claimed me as the High Lady of the Night Court.”

Shock was written all over Lucien’s face ashe realised what it meant. As for the first time since hismate death, he could picture a futur for him and the ones he cared about. As he sudendly knew what he had to do to reach it. Releasing a deep breathe, he looked right into Feyre’s eyes, determination waving all over him, a grin on his face.
“How can I help you, High Lady Feyre ?”

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10

Art Deco House, Lower Hutt, New Zealand.

This is the house I renovated between 2009 - 2013. It was built around 1945. Although the exterior had changed little other than the colour, the inside had suffered from many misguided renovations.

The seventies kitchen was completely gutted and fitted with a recycled sixties kitchen unit, painted and tiled to give it a 30s feel. The dining room fireplace is a recycled Art Deco original.

I had the luck of meeting the man whose father built the house shortly after WWII. He told me it was painted a salmon pink when it was first built. By the time I bought it, the house had long been painted white with blue detail, but was very faded. The colours I chose are from the Resene Heritage range, as is the green of the kitchen.

The antique Art Deco light shades and reproduction ceiling roses in the hall were added in 2012. Much of the furniture is original period pieces which I sought online.