Jeff Atkins Imagine (request2)
ahhhgggg, this was extremely difficult to write but I hope it’s good!
AU where Jeff didn’t die in the crash and Clay stayed with Hannah
WARNING: i’m pretty sure all of my imagines are going to mention weed in them
“He doesn’t remember your relationship with him.”
Those words were like an atomic bomb to you. In all of your years of life, it never crossed your mind that something this tragic would happen to you. No one expects it, you guessed. No one knew that your boyfriend of six months would get in a car crash and lose all of his memories of your relationship. Sometimes you blamed yourself. Why did you let him go on that beer run? Why didn’t you keep him at the party? Why did you let him leave drunk?
It could have been worse, you concluded. Jeff could have died, but it felt as if he did. And at first you had been in denial. You pushed passed persisting nurses and held is hand as he slept, but when he would wake up he would always just smile and say “Hi Y/N? Did you make cheerleader?”
So you stopped seeing him, because the first thing you told him on the first day of school was that you hoped that you would make cheerleader. That’s where his memory ended. He didn’t remember that the years of friendship had slowly begun to knit into something more, he didn’t know the intricate stitches of your shared secrets and nights on the roof of his car. But you could never forget because you loved him too much. Maybe that love is what sparked the hope in you, the hope that maybe in some way you could make him remember.
It had been two weeks after the accident, fourteen days of crying yourself to sleep and finding comfort in the bottom of red solo cups and rolled joints of cannabis. A Monday to be precise, when Jeff returned to school. You were dressed your best and had your makeup done after hours of being in front of a mirror, as if you were barely meeting him for the first time. When he walked in people crowded around his figure, giving him pats on the back and passing their condolences for his lost memory.
“No, it’s cool guys! Obviously nothing worth remembering happened during that time.” He replied with a laugh, oblivious with his giant forehead scar.
People turned in your direction, where you stood at the edge of the crowd, trying your best to hold back tears. Part of you was traumatized because you were thinking of what would have happened if you had truly lost Jeff in the accident, but you couldn’t even gain comfort from him because he didn’t remember that just those months ago you had shared your first kiss together.
People dissipated like ants, scattering away while staring at you. You knew some of them were scared to make you cry, because it had happened in the last week while you were at a basketball game. The others simply didn’t care so they stayed. The majority of them were the jocks like Monty, Zach, Justin, and Bryce.
“That’s got to burn,” Monty made a face while walking over to you. He placed his arm around you while you stared at Jeff laugh with his friends. “You know, Y/N, I’m all free, and since our little Jeffrey over there doesn’t remember a thing about your ‘relationship’ with him, it would be better if you just acted like it never even happened. You can’t get him to fall in love with again.”
You made a noise of irritation and sadness before turning around under
Monty’s arm and pushing his chest. “Shut the fuck up, Montgomery! Fucking fascist asshole!”
You took his arm from your shoulders and turned on your heel, storming to the red room, where you knew you would calm down. Pictures were a great hobby of yours, and it mean usually that you had to spend time with Tyler the school ‘creep’ but you didn’t mind very much.
“Bro, what’s her problem?” Bryce asked as you stormed way, Monty shrugging his shoulders like it didn’t hurt his feelings.
“She’s probably still pissed off because I didn’t go all the way with her Saturday at your get together. She was stoned as fuck.” The guys all laughed except for Jeff as they started to head in the other direction, talking about that night.
It was partially true, you had made out with Monty at Bryce’s party two days ago, but you had been desperate, stoned, and drunk and in desperate need of some relief. You were stressed out and depressed, what else were you supposed to do? Find help? Shrinks were a joke in this town, you would be laughed at. He was twisting the whole story, you were the one who would not mess with him, though.
“You coming, Atkins?” Justin asked when they were a little ways away, his eyebrows raised. All the guys looked to see that Jeff was shaking his head and scratching his head.
“I feel like I should go after her. I mean we are really close, right?” Jeff asked them, adjusting his backpack.
“Very close,” Justin smirked.
“What?” Jeff asked, knowing that he was missing something.
Zach reached over and smacked Justin, a look of pity coming over his handsome face. “It’s not about if you should or not, it’s if you want to go after her, man. It’s only if you want to see if she’s okay.”
Jeff stood there for a second as Zach watched expectantly, his fingers crossed. The other jocks rolled their eyes and took off. Jeff turned back to Zach and pointed to the way you had ran off to.
“I want to go after her, I don’t know why.” He said with his eyebrows furrowed.
Zach grinned and pointed to the hall as well. “You don’t need a reason. Just go.”
You placed the picture you had just developed on the clothespin line and hung it, a picture of you and Jeff at the beach, the both of you wrapped in each other while making panicked faces and pointing at a crab. It made you smile but you heart ache, and Tyler, who was standing next to you sighed and placed a hand on your shoulder.
“I’m sorry.” He breathed he looked down at his camera and ran his hand behind his neck.
“Stop apologizing!” You snapped, wiping a tear from under your eye. “I’m so tired of it. I know it’s tragic and I know it’s sad and pitiful, but don’t pity me. It’s all my fault anyways. If I would not have let Jeff leave that party for that stupid beer run he would still remember us. The things we shared with each other, the kisses, the love. He would remember that he loves– loved me and he would be in here right now making out with me and telling me I’m beautiful. But instead this happened. HE DOESN’T REMEMBER, Tyler! He just thinks we’re friends, and he just thinks that even his name means nothing to me. But Jeff Atkins means everything to me.”
Tyler put his camera down, wrapping his arms around your shoulders. You hugged him back, ignoring the small line of yellow light on the floor as you squeezed your eyes shut and cried into Tyler’s shoulder.
“Monty was right, I can’t make him fall in love with me again.” You sighed when you were calm, simply resting your head on Tyler’s shoulder. He had been patting your back but at your words he shot back and grabbed your shoulders.
“Y/N, are you kidding me? You and Jeff were relationship goals. I loved taking pictures of y’all and if I know one thing in this world is that you never truly forget a love like that.”
You looked into Tyler’s eyes to see that he was excited. You slowly began to get a feeling in the pit of your stomach. Maybe you could help him remember…or if that was impossible, maybe you could make him fall in love with you again.
“How do we do that, Tyler?” You asked, a smile growing on your lips.
“Easy! First, we make a plan. Do you remember the things that led your relationship to grow into more than friendship?” He asked, running around the room for a pen.
You sighed and looked back at the picture, your mind spinning into a fine silk of memories. “Every second with detail.”
The plan wasn’t easy, but one step at a time you seemed to get closer to Jeff, slowly feel a lot better about him falling back in love with you.
Step 1: Pull an all nighter with Jeff at the neighbors pool without getting caught (x) This is where you and Jeff first shared your deepest thoughts and even though you already knew what he had to say you still listened with your utmost interest and attention.
Step 2: Convince Jeff to let you do his makeup (x) this is where Jeff started to notice your beauty, or so he told you, when you were makeup less and your eyebrows were furrowed in concentration as you ‘carved out’ his eyebrows. This time Jeff was a little more compliant, pointing out colored eye shadows he wanted you to use and getting closer when you were contouring his nose (not that he needed it).
Step 3: Have a Star Wars movie marathon (x) this is where you started to show Jeff the nerdy side in you, and you figured out he had one of his own. This is where you two first cuddled, and where you finally realized you didn’t want to spend those long hours with anyone else. This time Jeff was quiet and didn’t ask much questions about what was going on, but you did catch him staring at you a few times. Eventually you both fell asleep on each other during the last scene of the empire strikes back, which was a shorter time span than you had thought you would last.
Step 4: Go on a mini adventure to all of the museums he loved (because, once again, that hidden nerdy side); this is where Jeff realized that you were really funny, as you kept cracking history jokes and just jokes in general. This time he told you jokes and you had a joke war, eventually getting lunch together and sharing a milkshake (cheesy, but Jeff had suggested it). (x)
Step 5: Party hard, smoke a joint together, and share your first kiss. (o) That’s where you both told each other how you felt, where you had engaged in a drunken make out session with Montgomery and he had gotten extremely jealous and nearly beat his ass for it. When you were sober he had taken you to the porch and watched you sip a cup of water before spilling his feelings out. This was the one step you were going to have the most trouble reenacting.
Good thing in this town, there was never a weekend that someone was not throwing a party. This time it was Zach Dempsey, because his family was out of town for a family reunion and he had faked sick, so he had his whole giant house to himself. The thing was that you were extremely nervous, and the only person that had been of help lately was Tyler, who had wholeheartedly given his all trying to help you with the plan was not invited to this party.
You were currently at your house while he sat on the floor sifting through photos of you and Jeff. “Who took these? They’re amazing.”
“My cousin, Angela. I think you would like her. She’s a fanatic for photography.” You giggled, putting a blouse across your body. You shook your head and threw it into a rising pile. “Ugh, I have absolutely nothing to wear.”
Tyler stopped looking at the photos and got up, shaking his jacket. “What do you mean? You have a million clothes…” You made a face at him. “Why don’t you just wear what you wore during step five the first time?”
You turned back to the closet and pushed the remaining clothes aside, spotting the striped t-shirt dress immediately. You reached over and pulled it out, letting the smooth material run through your fingers, memories flashing. There was the click of a flash and you turned slightly, to see that Tyler was looking at his camera. He walked over and showed you the screen.
“Look how much emotion is running through your eyes… you’re ready for this.” He said, patting your back as you looked down at the picture.
You flattened the dress on your body when you got out of your car, your hands slightly damp with sweat. You had paired the dress with a pair of flats, but this time you curled your hair and put it in two buns.Your makeup was done unlike that night and you were more nervous, that was for sure.
You finally pushed yourself to walk to Zach’s house; the music was already playing, vibrating your teeth and the smell of sweat and weed was so strong you needed to stop and take a breath. Of course it was a party after all. You made it to the front door after what felt like ages, and you took a deep breath.
“YN!” Someone yelled behind you, and you groaned. It was Clay Jensen and he was walking to the house as well with Hannah Baker.
You had been avoiding Clay like the plague, because he was a good friend of yours, but ever since that party where you and Jeff convinced him to stay with Hannah you couldn’t face him. You knew he was all about pity.
“Can’t talk, Jensen!” You yelled, running into the house and immediately going towards where you knew Jeff and the others were.
Jeff was always a careful person at parties, never letting himself go and usually occupying himself with things other than the drugs and sex. You knew he was in Zach’s game room, and where Jeff was, his followers were as well. No one liked to admit it, but Jeff was the best and most liked of the whole group of jocks and he wasn’t really like them but he hung out with them anyways because Jeff never judged.
“HEYY!” You yelled once you entered the game room, seeing that all of the guys and a few girls were crowded around the pool table. Everyone turned. “The life of the party is here.”
The guys clapped, whooping when you did a turn in the air, bringing out your special bag of weed from your bag. They got louder when they saw it. You laughed and walked over to the table, taking off your purse and setting it aside while you looked them over.
“Y/N, we were wondering if you were ever going to come.” Justin spoke, his hand not so discreetly laying on Jessica’s ass.
You rolled your eyes. “Foley I’m a cheerleader, I’m literally nearly obliged to come.”
You walked over and stood next to Jeff, who was smiling slightly as he looked you over.
“Now that is not true.” Zach started, placing his arm around your shoulder. “You’re a party animal.”
“You’re so right” You grinned, shaking the bag of cannabis. Zach gave you a high five and took it from your hands.
“Who is ready to smoke a good one and get high?” Zach yelled out, raising his hands above his head. You cheered with the others and they all went to the couches at the far right of the room, talking loudly.
Jeff stayed behind as you went to your purse and grabbed your cell phone. “Y/N?” He asked softly.
You turned to him and a piece of hair fell into your eyes, while you dug through your purse for a lighter now. He got closer and your breath sped up while your heartbeat increased, but on the outside you stayed casual. He reached a hand forward and removed the hair from your eyesight. “You look beautiful tonight.”
You could feel your heart swelling in your chest, like it was the first time he said it all over again, a smile creeping onto your face. You stood up straight, getting closer and patting his chest while leaning your head up. “Thank you, Jeff. You don’t look too bad yourself.”
Jeff rolled his eyes as you pulled your head back. “You gonna have a little fun with us tonight?” You asked him, looking over at his cup and seeing only carbonated soda.
Jeff sighed and shook his head. “I swore off everything when I got home from the hospital. I can’t let my senses become dull anymore, I can’t risk everything for a little high. My mom and dad were scared to death for me to come tonight. They shouldn’t be. So I’m not doing anything, Y/N. I’ll just watch and make sure you don’t do anything too stupid.”
He chuckled slightly and then touched his arm, squeezing it reassuringly. “That’s good, Jeff. I don’t know what I would do if I lost you again.”
You had said it without thinking and your eyes widened. He made a face of question but you quickly turned on your heel and sped to the group, squeezing yourself between Zach and Monty. Zach had already rolled one joint and yanked the lighter out of your hand, taking a big hit as he sparked the end of it. You took it from Zach and tried to one up him, smoke coming out of your nostrils as you did. The girls cheered and booed Zach for being beat by a girl. You handed it to Monty and he took it with a wink your way. You rolled your eyes and leaned your head back. The smoke drifted from between your lips and your nose, the feeling of it sending you to bliss. You looked up to see that Jeff was staring at you distantly, sipping his coke. You looked away quickly and distracted yourself with the others, suddenly forgetting about the plan.
When the joint was shriveling and Justin was rolling a second you had forgotten Jeff was there at all, and your legs was in Monty’s lap as he rubbed your thighs and you two laughed like nothing bad was happening. Like the rising anger that Jeff was trying to hold back. Because the plan had done it. When the others started on the second you grabbed the butt end of the old one and sucked in whatever was left, coughing and then grabbing Monty by the shoulders, bringing your mouth to his and blowing the smoke into his open mouth. He sucked it in them let it out, licking his lips and then catching your lips with his.
“OK, that’s enough!” You heard someone say loudly, but you kept on, kissing Monty’s mouth with force.
Then two arms were under your arms and you were being pulled away, both you and Monty protesting. You looked back and saw that it was Jeff, and the plan came to your mind again and you smiled lazily. He shook his head at you and then glared down at Monty.
“Don’t touch her again. Or I’ll kick your teeth in.”
The words echoed in your head and you bit your lip. He was being much more aggressive than what you expected. Especially with his words. Monty stood up like he was going to fight Jeff, a hurt look on his face but Zach placed an arm across his shoulders, pushing him back.
Jeff lifted you so you were standing straight and wrapped his hands around you elbow, dragging you through the house and to the front door. You two passed many people who looked like they wanted to ask questions, like Clay and Hannah but Jeff did not slow down in his angry march.
“Jeff, what’s up?” You asked with a slight squeak to your voice.
Jeff let you go when you two were on the foot of Zach’s porch, sitting down and then patting the spot next to you. You sat down as your heart beat faster with each second. This was starting to seem familiar, even with the clouds that were surrounding your mind.
“I mean, listen, I have no control over what you do but I really don’t like seeing you getting stoned.” Jeff said, looking away from you.
“Just getting stoned?” You asked while your hope started to deflate like a balloon.
“Not you just getting stoned.” He sighed, turning to face you formally. “I don’t like seeing you with Monty.”
You scooted closer without thinking and placed your hand on his shoulder, tears coming to your eyes involuntarily. “Why, Jeff?”
He pulled you closer and placed his forehead on yours, breathing you in. “Because I remember that I love you.”
Tears spilled out of your eyes and you pulled him into a long awaited kiss, your arms wrapping around his neck and his around your waist. The plan had worked and you had Jeff back, just like you wanted.
This took forevverr and it had such a shitty ending but thank you anon for the request! I hope you like it. (NOT EDITED)