republicans losing their shit on twitter

@tarmac-like-arteries and I love to cause each other massive amounts of pain with Check Please headcanons because we LIVE to S U F F E R and this is one of my better ideas. 

So by the time 2016 rolls around, Bitty and Jack are out to the public. After the heat dies down a little, someone (maybe the PR team, maybe Bitty, maybe Tater, maybe all three) convinces Jack he needs a social media presence. So he gets a twitter. He mostly just retweets the @FalcsOfficial account and posts artsy photos and he is the softest of bros. 

After Trump makes his locker room comment, Shitty absolutely loses his fucking cool. He goes on this huge twitter rant about rape culture and toxic masculinity and how those with privilege have a responsibility to cultivate a safe space for marginalized identities. He gets into sports culture and “locker room talk.” He calls out Trump’s racist garbage and all the Republicans just NOW pulling their support. Jack retweets a string of those tweets and in doing so incites a fucking SHIT STORM. At some point someone @s him:

Snorticia Adams @boxofrocks4u

@JLZimmermann Who would even WANT to share a locker room with that sentient yam?

Jack Zimmermann @JLZimmermann 

@boxofrocks4u I’d rather change on the ice.

Eric Bittle @omgcheckplease 

@JLZimmermann @boxofrocks4u  Okay  👀

There are like ten Buzzfeed articles about this by the end of the day and Tumblr loses its goddamn mind. Jack just keeps getting all of these angry tweets about how he should stay out of politics and stick to hockey. Of course eventually some slurs and general derogatory shit gets thrown around and Jack eventually responds:

Jack Zimmermann

A lot of people are tweeting me to let me know they’re shocked by my political leanings.

Jack Zimmermann @JLZimmermann

I don’t know what they expected. I’m a bisexual Canadian. 

Jack Zimmermann @JLZimmermann

Also fuck Trump.

Shitty Knight @Mr.Shitty 


Eric Bittle @omgcheckplease

@JLZimmermann  Is twelve pies too many pies? Too late. I’ve made my boyfriend twelve pies. 

Providence Falconers @FalcsOfficial

@omgcheckplease @JLZimmermann This is why the dietitians are always yelling at you, Zimmboni.