reminders of the past

catcherofforgottendreams  asked:

I freaking cried at your horror/romance story, that's unfair I didn't think writing still had that much of an effect on me. Honestly it reminded me of my past ghosts as well. Remembering the fragments of a person who is no longer there. Yet, your writing is beautiful and touching. Thank you so much for sharing it.

Thank you for reading it with so much understanding! That’s exactly the premise that I was writing off of–ghosts that linger in the corners of our subconsciousness after loved ones leave. 

I took it to a darker part in the end, but i’m so glad that that initial thought translated well enough to resonate with you!

I know lots of people like buff Kandros, but consider: Lanky Kandros, who has lost some muscle mass from leaving the turian Hierarchy/military and 600 years of stasis and then getting thrown back into a situation where he has to rebuild and resculpt himself, another reminder that he can’t escape the bonds of the past as much as he would want to. 

I’m trying real hard not to assume our HR person’s being super passive aggressive to me for being trans, but it’s hard when she gives my new employee a staff list with my old name on it cuz she “didn’t have an updated org chart” so she just printed out the staff list from our pay system.  which she’s reminded me MULTIPLE TIMES in the past that she can’t change my name on til I get my name change order and name updated on my Social Security card.  like.  you’re the HR person.  you should know it’s inappropriate to give an employee my old name.  ESPECIALLY when I’m their supervisor??  second, you’re an adult, you couldn’t go up to someone and ask for the updated org chart??

When you have a lot of intensely bad days in a short period - 

  • turn off the news
  • stay off of Facebook/any other social media with content that might upset you 
  • focus on right now
  • clean up your living space 
  • make sure you’re taking your meds
  • drink water
  • don’t drink alcohol
  • if you need a nap, let yourself nap
  • make yourself at least start your laundry
  • take a long shower/bath and do things that focus on making you feel good and clean (floss, brush your teeth, wash your hair, exfoliate, shave, etc.) 
  • pick up a project you put down a while ago, do some art therapy, exercise, or meditate if that’s your thing
Things I really loved about Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2 in earnest

Spoilers!!!!!

1. Yondu’s “I’m Mary Poppins y'all!” after Peter says he’s cool. Because yes, it’s a hilarious line, but it’s also such a DAD thing. Like, who can’t say that their dad wouldn’t be so proud to be considered cool by their son and it’s so unexpectedly sweet because of it.

2. The fact that Baby Groot cries like an actual baby once. Because it’s like it’s stabbing you in the heart, but it’s so effective because you really forget that he really is a baby with all the things he can do until then, and that brings you right back.

3. The symmetry in Yondu’s redemption. Yondu is damned because he brings Ego’s children to Ego and his planet to be sacrificed, and he’s redeemed by sacrificing himself to save Ego’s child (who really is HIS child) and bring him away from Ego’s planet.

4. Drax’s interaction with Mantis, especially him holding her while he drowns in Ego’s planet. Because Drax is like this big murderous comic relief character, but his screen time with Mantis was this lovely way to remind the audience that Drax has this soft side and this tragic past without shoving it in your face. Drax might laugh at your pain, but he’d also try to save you even as he was drowning, and it’s a perfect way to frame his character.

5. Ego’s “For the first time, I am truly not ALONE!” and his alieness in general. Because don’t get me wrong, Ego is absolutely a non redeemable wonky bonkers genocidal jerk off, but he’s got this great alien quality to him that I feel this series really needed. It’s not in how he looks, but his motives and how he acts. Ego is a millennia old being; a god in a world of mortals. His view point of the world and his actions are so very true to that idea that we almost can’t relate because no one can imagine what it must be like to be that old or that powerful. But when he yells that one line out, we really get it. Ego, for all his power, is just like us; he just doesn’t want to be alone. Coupled with his god like alien superiority, his ego - get it? ;) - he sees the expansion as the way to answer that feeling. If everything is him, after all, then he can’t be alone, see? What makes him a great villain is that he actually had the real answer all along - love, family - but he chose to destroy it because he felt it was beneath him; because of his subconscious disgust at his own desire to be “just like the rest of them.”

6. Nebula’s “You wanted to win and I just wanted a sister!” And how it turns the tables on how we view her relationship with Gamora. Because Nebula is clearly set up to be the ‘bad sister’ to Gamora’s ‘good sister’ and that one line really throws that on its head and shows that neither one of them are good or bad. I also love how it’s Gamora that ends up apologizing to Nebula, after everything, and Gamora who finally returns Nebula’s offer of sisterhood after all of those years.

7. “You shouldn’t have killed my mom and squished my Walkman!” Like, this line right here; the essence of Peter Quill in 10 words. Perfection.

8. The batteries as they relate to the parallel of Yondu’s and Rocket. Because them as a parallel is basically smashed over our heads, but I liked the subtle batteries parallel in that Rocket steals batteries he doesn’t need and Yondu steals Peter, who is used as a battery by Ego. It’s just a little thing but I found it really neat.

9. Rocket’s “I can only afford to lose one friend today,” line and how although it’s clearly framed to be about Peter, it’s also possibly about Yondu. Because no matter what, Rocket is losing a friend and it’s a great line to add to his character development from a guy who started trying to push his friends away to a guy who can’t lose them.

10. The contrast between how Peter reacts to the death of Ego and Yondu. He holds both as they die but he’s just silent and unaffected by Ego and he’s distraught and trying desperately to save Yondu, trying to pull off the suit to give to Yondu and save him instead. Can you say tears?

11. Don’t even talk to me about the Ravager funeral.

12. That the movie really was truly about family. Drax and his family and Mantis, Gamora and Nebula, Rocket and the Guardians, everyone parenting Groot and Peter realizing that the dad he’d wanted all along was actually the one he’d had. Often these superhero movies pull the “we’re family” card and it doesn’t feel earned, but man it does in this one. This movie is like Marvel’s “The Fast and The Furious IN SPACE” and it’s just great.

@the people only drawing michael w the philippine flag

draw 👏 the 👏 ecuadorian 👏 flag 👏 too 👏 u 👏 cowards

7

If I’m honest I know I would give it all back
For a chance to start over
And rewrite an ending or two 
For the girl that I knew

Sangwoo’s reaction and why it’s significant

I see a lot of people either disappointed over Sangwoo’s reaction or bemused because they expected it. I think there’s more to it. When I read the chapter, I noticed a few important things that I would like to point out. First, it’s important to remind everyone that Sangwoo is not a normal person. His way of dealing with trauma is to confront it, and exterminate the problem at its core. Sangwoo does not like feeling vulnerable. It diminishes his masculinity. It reminds him too much of his past, and of his mother who–like Bum–seemed to be the type of person who was easily taken advantage of. Frankly, weakness and indecisiveness just piss him off.

This brings me to my next few points:

When Bum spoke of his trauma, it reminded Sangwoo too much of his mother. 

Now, please note. We don’t know how Sangwoo’s parents perished. Some assume he killed them both, but that doesn’t make sense. Personally, with how Sangwoo speaks of mother with fondness, even I find it hard to believe that Sangwoo killed his own mother. (My theory is Sangwoo’s dad killed her during a domestic abuse episode and in turn, Sangwoo killed his dad.)

If you remember, there was that one scene way back when where it depicted “Sangwoo’s” hands around his mother’s neck, but I don’t think those were his hands. Sangwoo was hallucinating. 

That’s not from his point of view. It’s from his Dad’s point of view. And do you see that smile. Do you see how his mother isn’t fighting back? That’s stayed with him forever. His mother just taking it isn’t something that he’s forgotten. And what does Bum do? He takes it, just like his mother. He doesn’t stab his abuser, like Sangwoo suggests. He doesn’t do anything, because he’s afraid. So Sangwoo, whether consciously or not, starts drawing parallels: Bum (My Mom) is a weak person, who allowed his Uncle (My Father) to abuse him (her).

It’s history repeating itself and Sangwoo fucking hates it. So when Sangwoo reacts hostilely to Bum’s story, it’s not that he’s incapable of emotion or that he doesn’t “get” that Bum’s been raped. Quite the opposite.

He’s throwing a tantrum. He’s upset Bum was assaulted. In his head, Bum practically allowed it. And this anger shows in some fucked up way, he’s started to like Bum. I wouldn’t say “cherish”, because I’m not sure Sangwoo is capable of that, but he cares about Bum in a way that’s like his mother but not quite. (I think more so like a pet then a partner.) He knows what happened to Bum and what it all means, but he’s unable to act sympathetically, because he just wished that Bum (unlike his mother) could have fought back. Now let me say, this isn’t an attempt to justify Sangwoo’s reaction.

I’m a victim of sexual assault. I know, more than anyone, how fear can paralyze you into submission. I sympathize with Bum. I feel horrible for him. But Sangwoo isn’t, again, a normal person. He’s a sociopath. So Sangwoo doesn’t see that. He just sees two things: Bum didn’t try. Bum disappoints me. And it infuriates Sangwoo, because in a way, Bum’s uncle wins. Just like Sangwoo’s father won when he abused his mother. 

Sangwoo is hurt.

Most importantly, Sangwoo’s selfish.

His emotions are the only thing that matter to him.

Bum’s feelings mean nothing.

Last point: 

I think Sangwoo was planning to have sex with Bum.

Okay, I know, another stretch. But if you think about the last chain of events, it makes sense. Sangwoo has started to develop feelings for Bum. Not just emotionally, but sexually. Now given this new piece of information, I think Sangwoo is not only angry that Bum didn’t fight back, but that the abuser has been with Bum in an intimate way before he has. I think Sangwoo assumed Bum was a virgin, and he had planned on consummating their “relationship” very soon. The fact that Bum’s uncle already has done so… someone who’s abused Bum and reminds him of his Father… Well…

For him, that’s a turn off, and a let down.

Even literally froze when he saw them, imagine how hard that must have felt for him, all the reminders of his past mistakes but Isak was there to bring him back to the present, he was there to remind him he is worth it and he deserves to be loved and he isn’t alone, that he now not only has him but an amazing and supportive group of friends.

Some Daily Reminders

1. You can’t change the past.

2. Other peoples’ opinions do not define reality.

3. We each have a different journey and path.

4. Overthinking leads to torment and depression.

5. Happiness is an inside job.

6. Change your thinking, change your life.

7. Nothing beats compassion and kindness.

2

The Dakota Access pipeline has already leaked 84 gallons of oil

  • The Dakota Access pipeline has already leaked 84 gallons of oil, mere months after Native American protesters warned about the dangers of such a spill. 
  • The leak sprung at a pump station north of Crandon, South Dakota, on April 4, the local Aberdeen News reported Wednesday.
  • “This spill serves as a reminder that it is not a matter of if a pipeline spills, it’s a matter of when a pipeline spills,” Dallas Goldtooth, a campaigner with the Indigenous Environmental Network, said in a statement.
  • State officials said the leak was contained and cleaned up quickly, according to the Guardian, and NBC News reported that the runoff stayed within a designated containment area. 
  • But the incident serves as a dire reminder of how valid indigenous-led protests have been this past year. Read more (5/11/17)

follow @the-movemnt

  • Yuri: Vitya, I'm staying out late with Otabek.
  • Victor: Uh, no you're not.
  • Yuri: *smirking* Chihoko would let me.
  • Victor: *suddenly fueled by jealousy* ACTUALLY...
  • *A few hours later*
  • Yuuri: Victor, remind me again why you let Yuri stay out past curfew?
  • Victor: To overcome Chihoko.
  • Yuuri: VICTOR FFS
The mystery of Aang's blocked Chakra!

I don’t know if this has ever been mentioned or talked about before, but, guys, when Aang is fighting the fire lord he is forced to take refuge in a earth ball protecting him from the firelord if only for a little bit.

This is important. First, it’s literally Aang’s go to defense mechanism. His air ball he rides around on, the air ball he forms in his avatar state and it’s similar to the sphere he was “hiding” for a 100 years.

Think about it the creators are literally ending the story in almost the same way it began. Aang was forced to come out of his frozen airball by Katara and the need of the world. When he comes out Aang is all but still the same kid who ran away from his destiny and “failed” his people all those years ago.

Now he’s facing a man who feels no remorse over the slaughter of his people. Aang is forced back into a ball of protection all the while hearing how his people never even deserved to live and that he was weak. But Aang’s not weak he’s holding his own against Ozai. Everything Ozai is saying to belittle Aang is only filling him with more power even though his rock ball is breaking apart.

When it finally breaks the only element left is air. The element of his people. Aang knows he might’ve failed his people but he will not fail the world. He can’t disappear, he can’t run. He has to end this.

And then boom! Aang hits his back on a rock, directly on his lightning scar and then we get all these flashes of when he was shot down and flashes of all the past avatars. This whole scene stands to remind Aang that he cannot fail, not again.

Maybe it wasn’t significant enough in how he unlocked his chakra but after paying close attention to all the details in this round or rewatching I realized something about Aang’s blocked chakra.

People continue to assume that his chakra is still blocked because he refused to let Katara go, but in Crossroads of Destiny Aang literally blocks himself off from the fight to let Katara go in order to access the avatar state. He had to unblock this chakra to even enter the Avatar state which means letting Katara go wasn’t the reason his chakra was blocked after being struck down. I think the real reason is connected with how Azula struck him down, and the failure that comes with that. He lost that fight, he died. There is no getting around that and in the Awakening when Aang wakes up he feels like he failed the world all over again. This is made more obvious when Katara is treating his back and he is thrown back into the moment he was struck. He was watching the exact moment where he felt like he “failed” the world again.

Now we all know Aang has a major fear of failure and this just adds to it. By letting himself be struck down he let himself fail. Thus this is how his chakra is blocked.

And now in Sozin’s comet Aang is backed up into a wall, trying to avoid the Firelord knowing that if he gives up he fails the world, again. But then he’s thrown into a rock, forced to relive how he failed the world and he resolves deep inside himself that he’s not going to fail again. He forcibly reminds himself of who he is. He is not just the last airbender but he is the Avatar. And he will defeat the Firelord. This is why he finally is able to access the Avatar state in the finale.

And then it’s a big slap in the face to Ozai when Aang comes out of the rock and latches onto his beard and sends him on the run. Because how dare he call the Avatar weak. How dare he call airbenders weak, call Aang’s people weak. In these moments Aang is not only feeling fear of losing the war but also unbelievable rage at Ozai for saying all this things. But this time when Aang enters the avatar state and with the help of the past avatars he can control his emotions and channel them into defeating the Firelord.

Not to mention that the first strike Aang throws at Ozai is a powerful windgust, because even though he’s feeling the power from all four elements, air is rooting him and letting him stay in control of his Avatar state. And this is the reason Aang can stop himself from killing Ozai. Aang is in control and stays true to his people.

And that ladies and gentleman is my reading of Aang and Ozai’s fight. This show means way too much to me.

Daily reminder that Even doesn’t owe Isak anything and that he doesn’t have to tell Isak what happened in Bakka or who Mikael is, not until he’s ready to be open about it. Also reminder that Even’s past is his past and not Isak’s, or Isak and Even’s; it’s his past. A past that he’s clearly ashamed of and has not come to terms with yet. It’s his.

Also reminder that all the characters, especially the main ones, have hidden stuff about their past, mostly because they were ashamed of it and afraid of being judged by it. 

There’s Eva, who didn’t tell the girls about her past with Ingrid because she was ashamed of what she had done and didn’t want the girls to judge her for it, or to have the girls think that this was the kind of person she was.

There’s Noora, who lied about being a virgin because she felt ashamed of having sex when she was so young and because it was something that she didn’t like to talk about and that she didn’t like to remember really. It was her past and nobody but her had the right to know about it or be mad at her for not telling the truth about it.

There’s Isak, who didn’t want or feel like sharing what he had done in the past. It’s the whole “you don’t want to know” when Even asks him to tell him about his master lying ways in 03x10. It’s because he still felt guilty about it, as seen during his conversation with Eva, and he felt ashamed about it. But also, he didn’t owe anything to Even to tell him about that part of his life.

So please, there’s a reason why Even doesn’t want isak or anyone else to know and he has every right to not want to talk about it.  

When ever you need to, take a moment to free your mind from anything that may be holding you back for longer than it should. Your life is meant to experience personal growth, and to do this one must not be bound by the shackles of oneโ€™s past.
—  Nicole Addison @thepowerwithin