remember where it all began

When selection is life

For real though; thank you @partylikeawordstar. You’ve changed my life with this series and I’ll be forever grateful. Now, when I’m eighty years old, I’ll be able to look down at this and remember where it all began.

That’s My Girl (Grayson)

Summary: You’re a famous author struggling to meet the deadline for your latest book, until your husband helps you recall a memory the two of you share, inspiring you to finish. 

Word Count: 2,675

Warnings: None; an occasional curse word.

Author’s Note: Anything written in italics involves a flashback the reader (Y/N) is having. Also, for the full effect of this one shot, listen to “Gracie’s Theme” by Paul Cardall while reading. It’s a beautiful song that I listened to on repeat while writing this. Please enjoy! Requests are open!

Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap…

Your fingers fly furiously across the keyboard of your laptop, working at lightning speed to finish the manuscript that’s due to your publisher by tomorrow afternoon. As an author with six novels to your name, deadlines weren’t unfamiliar to you, but you have never found yourself struggling to string together a book the way you have been with this one. Thrillers, mysteries, those were your forte, and those were the genres that got you nominated for a Pulitzer Prize last winter. However, when your publisher approached you with the idea of taking a break from fiction to produce a memoir for your readers, you were more than hesitant. Sure, you were placed in extraordinary circumstances after graduating college with a literature degree, but you didn’t find yourself to be extraordinary. Eventually, you caved, but you found that writing about yourself was a lot harder than it sounded. Why was it so much easier to make up stories about other people than it was to tell the truth about yourself?

A knock on the door of the master bedroom pulls you from your trance-like state, and you direct your attention to the sound, finding your husband peeking his head in the door frame and looking at you with curious eyes.

“Am I interrupting the artist’s work on her latest masterpiece?”

You giggle and motion for him to join you on the California king bed where you’re propped up against the headboard, a couple of fluffy pillows acting as a barrier between your backside and the cold wood. The mattress underneath you shifts as he throws one leg over onto the bed, and then the other, crawling on all fours until the right side of his body is butted up against your left. You sign heavily and lower the screen, throwing it off to the side before placing your cheek on his shoulder and softly stroking his forearm with your thumb.

“Some artist I am tonight, Gray. I’ve never cut a deadline this close before, and the crunch time is not motivating me whatsoever. Everything I type sounds like absolute shit when I read it back… It’s dry, it’s uneventful, and I’ve hit a lull after talking about the experience of getting my first novel published. I don’t want to submit this low-quality work tomorrow. I’m half-temped to call and ask for another extension.” The words make you cringe the moment they leave your lips; if you did such a thing, it would be the third extension you asked for on the manuscript.

A low chuckle escapes Grayson’s body, causing your head to move up and down with the jarring of his shoulders. “Well, there goes our mortgage payment for next month.”

You look up at him with narrow eyes, only to have his lips graze your forehead tenderly. “Sweetheart, relax. I’m the last person putting pressure on you. You know that.”

You did know that. The past couple of weeks, Grayson has kept his distance, letting you lose yourself in your work with minimal interruptions aside from the occasional reminder to eat (Your readers are probably not fond of how Y/N’s writing sounds when she’s hangry), sleep (The writer’s block will clear in the morning, love), and take a breath of fresh air (A walk will do you some good, come take one with me). Ever since the beginning of your relationship, his ability to gauge when you need him close and when you need him to disappear into the background has been impeccable, and you haven’t taken it for granted in the almost-five years you’ve been married.

Grayson’s fingertips touch the silver wedding band on your ring finger, and you hold your hand up in response, letting the low spotlighting in the bedroom refract off the small stones. Because you rarely wear jewelry (aside from the nose piercing you gifted yourself on your eighteenth birthday so many years ago), Grayson knew to pick a simple engagement ring, one with a single oval diamond in the center of the set. The band he chose to put on your finger the day of your ceremony, however, was more his taste: slightly more extravagant and covered in bling. The engagement ring and the band complimented each other well, though, and when the two of you went to get them welded together, you couldn’t help but notice how the rings mirrored your relationship; you were both opposites who seemed destined to always belong with each other.

Your voice drops just above a whisper. “It’s still beautiful after all this time, isn’t it?”

“God, it is… Every time I look at that thing, it brings me right back to the day I proposed. I was so nervous, I could barely walk in a straight line. The box was burning a hole in my coat pocket for hours.”

You lean forward and grab the pillows behind your back, laying them flat against the mattress to rest your head on. Grayson shimmies down next you, reaching to take a fistful of comforter bunched up at the foot of the bed and drapes it gently over the both of you as you shift to face each other. His forehead meets yours and he takes both of your hands in his, holding them close to his chest. This was the position you both took each time you reminisced about your relationship, and you urged him to tell the story again. A huge smile breaks out onto his face and he complies, because this is a story he never grows tired of telling.

“I took you back to where it all began, remember? It was in the vast, breathtaking, dense woods where I fell in love with you. It was when were there the first time that I knew one day, I was going to ask you to be mine forever.”

You close your eyes, recalling that place with ease:

Grayson took you camping on your first date together, but instead of opting to rent out a plot of land on a campsite for the weekend, he wanted to take you far away from the bright lights and the constant buzzing that was always surrounding your lives. The both of you were younger, more naïve, and your first novel had just sold over one million copies. Before the date, you were instructed to layer up, lace on some hiking books, bring a warm sleeping bag, and leave the rest up to him. He showed up at your apartment in a pick-up truck on a Friday afternoon, the bed already packed full of supplies and gear you would need for the weekend and told you to relax as he drove for hours, each mile taking you farther and farther way from civilization.

 You looked over at Grayson, taking in his profile for a moment before crossing your legs underneath yourself. “Do you mind telling me where we’re going?”

Grayson smirked and turned his head to meet your eyes. “Don’t worry, our destination still has cell service, so you can call someone to come and pick you up if you get tired of me.”

“I’m not concerned about getting tired of you. I’m concerned about coming home from this date in a body bag, or bags, depending on if you like your victims in tact or not.”

Your response elicited a loud cackle from him; he glanced over his shoulder before clicking on his turn signal and changing highway lanes while the sound radiated from his body. You closed your eyes. That beautiful sound would never be something you’d get used to.

“Are writers always this imaginative? The thought of something that horrific never even crossed my mind.”

“Comes with the territory,” you shrugged. “But to be sure, you have actually read my book, right?”

“Why do you think I kept bugging you on social media until you’d talk to me?”

“Well, I’m sure you’ll be glad to know I’ve started working on my second one.”

Grayson let out a small squeal. “Wow, I am glad. Let me know when you’re done with your first copy. I want to be the first one to read it before it’s even submitted for editing.”

“I wanted everyone to witness it. My family, your family, everyone.” Grayson’s voice brings you back to the present, forcing you to open your eyes. “They were there for hours before us, adjusting cameras, building the fire, even meticulously laying down the path of white orchids.”

“My favorite flowers,” you mutter.

“I know. Now they’re my favorite, too.”

“I can’t believe it went off without a hitch.”

“Yeah, me neither.”

The scene for the proposal looked like something only from your wildest dreams. It took Grayson weeks to plan it all, you would find out later, and he was able to finesse your two younger sisters and parents to help set it all up in tandem with his brother, sister, and parents. You hadn’t been to the camping spot since your first date, and it was his suggestion to make another weekend trip to the woods in celebration of three years of dating. Night just began to fall, but it wasn’t the sunset that made you gasp as Grayson turned the car off the highway and onto the dirt path that led to your spot. Rather, it was the paper lanterns strung far along the branches of tall pine trees and the white orchids laid out, concealing the brown dust on the ground.

“What is all of this?” You inquire, climbing out of the car, Grayson following close behind.

Soft, melodic music began to play out from speakers tucked somewhere among the thick brush. A crisp breeze danced around your body, rustled the trees, and caused you to shiver; you pulled your wool trench coat closer to your body and buttoned it up to your collar to prevent anymore wind from climbing down the front of your body. Grayson, clad in jeans, Doc Martens, a thick black scarf, and a trench coat of his own, reached for your hand and slowly intertwined his fingers with yours. You reached across the front of your body to grab his bicep with your other hand and the two of you set forward on the path, lightly marching to the tempo of the music, careful to not destroy any of the flowers underneath your feet.

“This is all for you, my love. I wanted to find an unforgettable way of celebrating the last three years of our lives together.”

“So naturally, you brought us back to the place we fell in love…”

“…But I spruced it up a bit,” he finished your thought for you. “You’ll see what I mean.”

“I already do see what you mean,” you scoffed in amazement, motioning to the lanterns before placing your hand back on Grayson’s arm. “This is breathtaking.”

“I just wanted it to resemble you.”

You rolled your eyes before breaking out in a toothy grin. Cheesy compliments always made you cringe, but with the amount of work Grayson put into the presentation of this date, you let it side. He was always doing that, finding a way to work reminders of how beautiful he thought you were into every conversation you had with him, and even though you shrugged them off as they came in an attempt to remain modest, they truly touched you every time you heard one.

The two of you continued to walk along the path, hand in hand, your eyes constantly scanning your surroundings in awe, Grayson’s eyes on you, elated his plan was working. After a few minutes, he reached over with his free hand to brush away stray hairs that fell into your eyes as you began to hum the melody of the new song that began playing from the speakers. “This is one of my absolute favorites. I listen to this song on repeat when–“

“When you get a new idea for a book, I know,” he cut you off. “Actually, this is perfect timing, because I only want your favorite songs to be connected to your favorite memories, and here’s to hoping this is the best memory yet… Because we’re finally here…”

Grayson steps behind you to give you a complete view of the made over camping spot that was nestled behind a small bending of the thick trees, and a loud exhale escaped from your lungs. An enormous bonfire the size of a teepee burned in the center of the space, casting a red glow on your surroundings. Smaller candles were lit and placed around the perimeter, boulders rolled behind them to ensure the flame wouldn’t fall and catch the foliage on fire. More white orchids were placed on the ground, and the trees above twinkled with blinking lights, smaller and more vibrant than the paper lanterns on the trail behind you. Your favorite part of the view, however, was the cliff edge that sat over the river, giving way to the hues of pink, orange, and purple that swirled in the sky.

“Gray,” you muttered, releasing your hand from his and taking a step forward to pace around the fire. “You did all of this? When? How?”

The music from the speakers picked up and sounds of violins cascaded through the air, forcing you to choke back sobs. The atmosphere, the décor, the sunset, everything was picturesque, almost from out of a movie. You couldn’t believe someone cared about you enough to do this for you.

“Well, I don’t want to take all the credit. I enlisted the help of a few workers.” Your back was turned away from him at this point, hands in your coat pockets, staring out into the open abyss. “There’s no way I could have pulled something like this off all on my own.”

“Workers? What kind of workers?” The smell of the fire filled your nostrils and you took a deep breath, wanting to remember everything about this moment forever.

“Ones who love you almost as much as I do.” You could hear his voice getting closer with every word, but by the end of his phrase the sound suddenly fell to the ground, as if he had dropped it on accident. Befuddled, you turned around, lowering your eyes to the dirt before involuntarily throwing your palms over your mouth with a loud yelp.

“Y/N, every day I spend with you feels like something from a dream. I cannot believe that I was able to steal the heart of someone as magnificent and exquisite as you. Your intellect, creativity, and tenderness constantly amaze me. I don’t deserve you, I really don’t, but I’d love to spend the rest of my life trying to prove to you that I do… God, you’re so much better with words than I am, but I’ve been holding onto these four little ones since our first night out here: Will you marry me?”

“And just like that,” you breathe, “you were kneeling on the ground, holding the ring, waiting for me to stop sobbing long enough to give you a response.”

Grayson let go of your hands and placed his palm on your cheek, rubbing the high planes with his thumb. “Do you remember what you said to me?”

“I don’t even think I said ‘yes.’ I think I just looked at you and told you that I actually saw what you meant before grabbing the ring and putting on myself. And then our families startled me half to death, running out from behind the trees with cameras, hooting and hollering before swinging us around in glee.”

“Well, who could blame them? Marrying you was all they heard me talk about since the moment I met you.”

You smile, suddenly realizing that the best moments of your life actually took place after your first novel was published. Sitting up, you grab the laptop, opening up your latest word document before glancing back over at Grayson, who lay watching you.

“Hey, Gray, thanks. I might actually finish this thing tonight because of you.”

Grayson winks before reaching to scroll through his phone. “That’s my girl.”


GAMING MEME: [9/10] games 

➟Fallout 3

“Here we are. Where it all began. You remember your mother’s favorite passage? Revelation 21:6. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life, freely. Don’t you see? This is what it all means. The water, the purifier. THIS is the water of life. Your mother’s dream. No point in wasting time. Let’s get to work. There’s much to be done.“

“ I’m just the boy inside the man,not exactly who you think I
Trying to trace my steps back here again, so many times
I’m just a speck inside your head, you came and made me who
I am,
I remember where it all began,so clearly..

I feel a million miles away,still you connect me in your
And you create in me,something I would’ve never seen
When I can only see the floor, you made my window a door
So when they say they don’t believe, I hope that they see
you and me,
After all the lights go down, I’m just the words you are the
A strange type of chemistry, how you’ve become a part of me.. “

Just a Prank

Title: Just a Prank

 Prompt: “With this face I can get away with anything.” A prompt by @one-shots-supernatural for the #SPN Hiatus Writing Challenge.

 Summary: Dean has been pulling pranks on you, without realizing how it was making you feel. It isn’t until you finally break down that Dean realizes his mistake.

 Warnings: Pranks that don’t end well.  Mentions of past bullying.  

 Tags:  @grace-for-sale , @lucifer-in-leather , @thewicked-end , @chelsea072498 , @nerdwholikesword , @chaos-and-the-calm67 , @percywinchester27 , @pizzarollpatrol , @savingapplepie-eatingthings , @cici0507 , @wayward-mirage , @charliebradbury1104 , @melonberri , @bellastellaluna , @pinolief2001 , @feelmyroarrrr , @carry-on-my-wayward-girl , @girl-next-door-writes , @twoboys-and-afallenangel , @fangirl-faye , @the-assbutt-impala , @impalapossible @idreamofhazel

Let me know if you want to be tagged in my stories! :D  

Masterlist of FanFiction

Originally posted by zest-wincest

“You are playing with fire.”  Sam warned Dean as he watched his brother set up his little trap.


“Calm down, Sam.  It is just a little joke.  It’ll be fine.”  Dean checked the string again, making sure it was pulled tight so when he yanked on it from outside the door, it would pull the bucket over, then…poof!

“Dean, seriously.  You have been pulling a lot of pranks on her lately.  I think you should stop.”  Sam chastised again. He knew that all these ‘jokes’ Dean had been playing on you were starting to get to you.  He could see it in your face.  But, Dean never seemed to catch it, he was too busy laughing his ass of.  

First was the whoopy cushion, which didn’t seem to faze you.  But then it was the salt shaker trick, the rubber band around the sink sprayer.  One by one they added up until your fuse was getting short.  Sam could see it.  He wasn’t sure why these little pranks bothered you so much, but they did.  

“There we go!  Perfect!” Dean quickly hopped off the stool and then ran the string outside and laid it against the trim, effectively hiding it.  

Keep reading

Safe (Seungcheol/S.Coups)

type: angst
pairing: you x seungcheol
synopsis: long distance relationships are already hard, now add a boyfriend who’s ignoring you, a trip to see him and a car crash and see how things start to get even worse :)
words: 1482
a/n: i really like how this turned out !!!


It was safe to say you were a little more than upset. Having an idol as a boyfriend, having to share him with the rest of the world and barely seeing him in person can make such feelings churn within a person. It was safe to say you were a little more than angry. Having someone like him who promised to stay in touch, to call everyday, to visit as often as he could only to find zero recent messages and zero missed and recent calls, could really get on person’s nerve. It was safe to say you were a little more than hurt. Having a boyfriend who couldn’t make the time to even send you a simple hi, but having all the time in the world to meet people like him. People like him, people who were famous, people who were rich, people who had connections. People, not like you. It was people like him, that caused people like you the pain and sadness in their hearts.

Once upon a time, he was once a person like you, but it was safe to say fame got a little over his head and now he can’t even remember the ones who were there where it all began.

And you knew this was gonna happen, you knew it. You knew that him leaving wouldn’t be a good idea, you knew that him being hours away from you wasn’t going to end well, you knew it. But Seungcheol had a way with his words that really made you believe that you two could get through it together. He made you believe that he’d make time for you even when it seemed impossible to do so, he made you believe that you were a priority in his life, he made you believe that he loved you, and you were a fool to believe him. After a mere few weeks, the calls ceased, the texts disappeared and it was like you never even knew him in the first place. To be honest, he left you confused, you had no idea what to do, it wasn’t like he broke up with you, he didn’t say anything about that, yet by the way he was acting, it wasn’t like he loved you the way he did before. What you really needed, was some closure, some reassurance, and that was what you were gonna get.

You had planned on visiting Seungcheol for a while now, but constantly battled against yourself whether it was a good idea or not. Perhaps there was a reason why he had been avoiding you, perhaps it was because Pledis wouldn’t allow him to… Or perhaps it was because he was embarrassed to be dating a normal, plain person like you. Either way, you needed to see him to confirm any thoughts you had in your brain about the relationship you have or once had.

Once you had entered your car and you had embarked on the three hour drive to him, you decided to give him a heads up on your arrival. The phone ringed for a few seconds and on the 5th ring, his voice answered for the first time in a long time.

“Hello? ________?” His voice said, a hint of confusion lacing in with his words. A pang of mixed emotions washed over you as the sweet sound of his voice reached you. You were happy he finally answered, but at the same time you were mad and upset that after these many, many months, he responded, but with confusion as if he was wondering why you, his significant other , was calling.

“Seungcheol? Hi, I’ve missed you.” You whispered over the phone, keeping your eyes focused on the road in front,“I know it’s been a while, but I just had to see you… I’m coming over to yo-”

“No.” What he said sent daggers to your heart, making you swerve to the right a little causing you to realign yourself to the road before an accident occurred.

“W-what? I don’t… I don’t understand, it’s been months.”

“I can’t… I don’t want you to come over.” And those words were like a trigger, right after he had said the last syllable, it was like a dam had broken. The tears being the water, all the pain and all the loneliness you had felt over the many months you’ve been away from him just suddenly came back to you. You had begun to cry, and by the looks of it, there was no way you were stopping any time soon.

Tears clouded your vision, and only then when it was too late had you realised how dangerous the situation you were in was. Only then, when it was too late did you realise that your life was at risk. Only then, when the massive truck hit the front of your car, did you realise it was too late to process anything that was going on, and as your car flipped over and your hearing and vision faded, the only thing you could hear was the anxious calling of your boyfriend on the cellphone.


“Hello? Hello? __________? ________, what’s going on?” With every passing second of silence, more and more panic rose up inside of Seungcheol. His excessive shouting caught the attention of the other members as they all rushed away from their work to see why their level headed, calm leader and their eldest hyung, was having a panic attack right at that moment. He ignored all the questions from the members and stayed focused on listening for your voice on the other line. He listened for over 20 minutes, and just as he was about to hang up, the sound of sirens came to his attention. The shuffling around, the voices of medics filled his ears, suddenly, a mans voice came and spoke to him through your phone.

“Who’s this?” The medics voice said.
“Choi Seungcheol, I-I’m _________’s boyfriend.”
“Seems like they got into a really bad accident, they’re on the ambulance as we speak, we’ll meet you in the hospital.”

Seungcheol needn’t say another word as he hung up, grabbed his jacket and sprinted out the Pledis building; ignoring the questions his dongsaengs were throwing at him. He needed to get to you… now.


The second his eyes landed on your unconscious body, he burst into tears. How long has it been since he last cried like this? Far too long. But he couldn’t help himself this time, seeing you lay there; your skin a pale sickly complexion, with blotches of red, purple and blue scattered around, killed him. Plus the fact that he was the cause of this crash hurt him to the max. Cautiously, as if he was afraid he might break your fragile body even more, he took your hand in his, a sob coming out as it felt limp and cold against him. It was quiet for a while, the only sound being heard, the monitor that determined your hearts activity. It was quiet until Seungcheol decided to speak up.

“God, ________, what have I done to you?” He whispered, his fingers tracing over the side of your bruised face, “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. This was all my fault, all I wanted was to keep you safe, that was my intention all along. It must’ve seemed like I was neglecting you, but in reality I wasn’t, I was just trying to keep you safe from the world. I love you, ______, I can’t live without you. Despite all the doubts you must’ve had in your brain, I truly, really, love you… And miss you too. Everyday, I miss you. I miss the way you snore softly in the morning, the way you laugh when I kiss you awake and the way your nose crinkles when you smell my morning breath.” The last few words caused a small, sad smile to appear on his lips as he began to reminisce the memories. But he soon came to realise how much it hurt for you when he was ignoring you and he was back to feeling guilty all over again.

“Please wake up, ______. I-I need to tell you all this in real life, I need to tell you how all I wanted was to keep you away from the hate, from the world of popularity as much as I could so that you wouldn’t get hurt, so that you would be safe. But by the looks of things, you’re less safe when your away from me and I’m so sorry it took me that long to realise. I’m never leaving your side again, ______, but I need you to wake up for me, please.”

Seungcheol knew what he was saying was absolute nonsense and his eyes filled with tears once more.


A relieved smile came to his face. You were safe now, with him.


Don’t Leave Me Here

Originally posted by joshwahington

AU set during high school where reader and Josh share a strict friends with benefits deal. But emotion ensue and suddenly that arrangement doesn’t work for everyone. (Josh/Reader)

[Credit to gif creator]

Fandom- Until Dawn

Characters- Josh Washington plus others

Persona- Female.

Song Credit - Hello My Old Heart by The Oh Hellos

Warnings- Language, sexual content, abuse

Hello my old heart

How have you been?

Are you still there inside my chest?

I’ve been so worried

You’ve been so still

Barely beating at all

A rhythm beating in your ears makes it easy to forget where you are in the world. Suddenly you see the skies stretch before you, and there’s then moon in the distance and you think, if you could just stretch your hand out a little further, you might reach it. But you can’t. The moon stays were it is and so do you. You thought that’s what love felt like. Love. It’s monosyllabic and heavy on the tongue like treacle dripping from your lips. It’s not like how you read about it in books or watched in movies. It certainly feels a lot fucking worse. The thrum of music, the rain water beating on the window pane. You curled up deep beneath your blankets, staring at your reflection in the mirror like it was someone else. You rubbed at the bruises on your wrist absent minded, black bands like wrist watches. It would be nothing at all to throw your mug at the mirror and shatter that strangers face. Nothing at all.

You remember where it started, where it all began. It was the time when you decided to spend a great deal of your time around Josh Washington and his friends. When you began a habit of wearing your shirts cut low and your hair down long, and when you tilted your head to expose the whiteness of your neck, it was often peppered with purple bruises. It wasn’t long before Josh’s gaze fell upon them, and a shorter time before he invited you to his party.


You balanced a beer in one hand, swinging back its contents like it was going out of style and shuffling to the beat blaring from the speakers the best you could in heels. You had been keeping an eye on Josh most of the night as he stumbled with a drunken fervour, half the time throwing arms comradely around your group of friends and the other half lurching with cups in hand. He and Chris had been drinking enough to put down a horse. Chris had already fallen victim to what you liked to call ‘Sailors Slumber’, slumped against the kitchen table, comatose. Josh had grinned drunkenly towards you from time to time and you had returned them. He moved through the crowd towards you and flung his arm around your shoulders pulling you close and pressing his face close to your ear, you teetered back on your heels a little.

“Hey (-), have I told you how good you look tonight?” Josh whispered, slightly slurred. You had dressed in tight jeans that hugged you close and a shirt that was cut a little looser than usual.

“Once or twice.”

“I mean wow, it’s just so…tight.” Josh leered appreciatively. “So when you gonna let me take you to the Bone Zone? I could show you the best time.” He teased. You felt your face flush,Josh was a rather notorious flirt. But you bared a shit eating grin anyway.

“Promises, promises.” You smiled.

“Fuck, you want to hook up?” Josh said dumbfounded. You swayed in your heels as Josh hung onto you, trying to focus through the haze. You grinned, pulling him close and crushing your lips against his, Josh was caught off guard but quickly balanced and gripped you hard by the hips. Hauling you flush together.

“Looks like someone’s getting some!” Jessica jeered. Josh threw a middle finger up behind his back, and the group laughed and whooped.

“Lets move.” You said between kisses and Josh nodded, pulling you by the arm.

Seconds that felt like hours passed as you kissed. Josh had braced his hands either side of your head, his breath reeking of alcohol but you had kissed him all the same. His kisses were always noisy, as if he never breathed through his nose. Panted gasps. Josh was rougher when he drank, palming at your pert breasts through your cotton shirt, rutting against your leg like a dog to his master. It was clumsy and heated. You tried your best to please him, to want him to come back for more. Josh’s quick fingers were playing at the front of your jeans, foreheads pressed together as he scrabbled with your zip. Your lips and teeth bumped together clumsily, your hands fisting into the front of Josh’s shirt. He sucked on your bottom lip, and his hands finally found their way into your jeans. His fingers rubbed against the front of your underwear. You had groaned at the soft ministrations,and he had taken you be the hand and led you to his room in the dark.

From there on, your trysts became a regular occurrence.Sometimes, when you shared a quiet moment, usually when you were both sated and Josh hasn’t the effort to pull on his clothes and scarper, you would talk. Sex loosened Josh’s tongue. You would listen, listen with the rapt attention as your head rose and fell with his breaths. He would talk about his family, his interests, stuff that mattered to him the most. It felt real. It felt normal, as if you could hold him close and live in this moment.But you knew what he wanted, you knew it then when he held your close and kissed your face with those rough hands manhandling your chin. The quiet was over.  

When you were done Josh pulled on his clothes and picked up his bag. He wavered by the door to look at you, and you weren’t surprised by the look of uncertainty,even as he smiled. It was an arrangement, of course. He gets something, I get something, you thought. Josh had someone to fuck regularly without the hang ups of a relationship, without the clawing monster pulling back at his sleeve (please, please don’t walk away) and you, well you got to be close to Josh even if only when with his lips on your jugular and his cock inside you. It wasn’t love, but it was something.

“Well, I guess Ill see ya.” He said, and closed the door on the both of you.

 Oh, don’t leave me here alone

Don’t tell me that we’ve grown

For having loved a little while

Oh, I don’t want to be alone

I want to find a home

And I want to share it with you


I’m just the boy inside the man, not exactly who you think I am
Trying to trace my steps back here again so many times
I’m just a speck inside your hand, you came and made me who I am
I remember where it all began so clearly 

We all wanna be somebody, we’re willing to go but not that far.

Rolelplay Shipping Graphics (1/??): Phoenix/Edgeworth 
For: @edqewcrth
Faceclaims used.

Personals may like, but please don’t reblog.
Roleplay blogs can reblog if wanting to.


Wildcard #17

The Captive Prince Trilogy by C.S. Pacat

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

I’ll be honest with you, I was not expecting to be blown away by this trilogy. In fact, I wasn’t really that eager about starting it. I’d heard some fantastic things about it from my Goodreads friends, but at the same time it was adapted from a web series, was a romance and I’ve read my fair share of long romantic fanfiction. Let me get something straight: this is not one of them. The trilogy was well-written, engaging and definitely a novel – I mean I finished the whole thing in four days, which is why the review is not separated by book (it’s pretty hard to remember where one finished and the next began!)

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To soar above the clouds.
To dissect memories piece by piece
and put them back together over and over
like a giant puzzle.
To collapse under the blanket
of the morning fog
with the future shining brightly
ahead of us.
What I’m trying to say is
I want to add your flaws to my flaws
and multiply it with our love
to get years of getting to know each other
because I want to keep learning
and trying
and finding the edges of your shape
What I’m trying to say is
happiness echoes from every step
we take along this journey,
and I wonder where I’m going to put it all
when my heart is brimming
with it and more.
What I’m trying to say is
I’m enamored with the stars,
and I want to keep the flame burning.
To forget about preconceived notions
of what this is supposed to look like.
To rewrite the definition
and make it our own.
To entangle my quirks and yours,
along with the way we sigh
each other’s names.
To cradle all the summers of beginnings.
To choose this again and again.
To remember how it all began,
the roads taken,
and where this is going.
What I’m trying to say is
I’m picturing soft joy in the silent moments
when our eyes meet.
What I’m trying to say is
I’m in love.
What I’m trying to say is
it’s with you.
—  (NJ.) // gentle caresses and whispers of us

i have really strong feelings about the first scene in tfc where neil tries to run an andrew hits him with his racket. i mean, this story is so memorable and important and its such an incredible ride. to think back to the beginning and remember where it all began–one Boyfriend™ stopping the other from running for the rest of his life with one swing–is oddly nostalgic and it makes me smile. like who knew it would go this far? not neil josten that’s for sure.

Doctor Who Revival 10th Anniversary

On the 26th March 2005, at 7:00pm, a legend was reborn. Now about 10 years later, Doctor Who has gone from long-lost TV classic to worldwide phenomenon. We’ve been through 5 Doctors, 8 companions, 3 TARDISes, 3 spin-offs, 2 head writers, 12 specials and 8 series. But we all have to remember where it all began, with Christopher Eccleston and Billie Piper in the classic episode “Rose”, in which the Ninth Doctor got a new companion, Rose Tyler, and fought against the Autons and Nestene Consciousness, monsters he had already battled twice before. 

I propose that to celebrate 10 years of this beloved show being revived, fans of the show could rewatch Rose at the original air time, 7.00pm on the 26th March, but this time in 2015. We could maybe even live tweet it, with the hashtag #10YearsOfWho. It’s just an idea, but I know I will be doing it, to celebrate 10 years of being a fan.