Rate the Ship - Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it!| Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs
How long will they last? - eternally (or until the glow cloud has consumed the city and everyone within it, whichever comes first).
How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Cecil fell in love with Carlos as soon as he saw him and Carlos fell in love with Cecil as quick as the radio waves can travel across Night Vale.
How was their first kiss? - passionate, with the ON AIR sign still illuminated above their heads.
Who proposed? - Carlos. Cecil was tongue-tied for a good few heartbeats which Carlos pointed out as considerably surprising and incredibly charming considering Cecil’s typically fluent way with words.
Who is the best man/men? - Earl Harlan
Who is the bride’s maid(s)? - Intern Maureen Mayor Cardinal and Janice
Who did the most planning? - Cecil, much to Carlos’ trepidation who was given the back seat on the event and didn’t even know where it was being held until a couple of hours before.
Who stressed the most? - Cecil, everything needed to be perfect and it was very difficult as the church had to move buildings every few days to avoid the jellyfish infestations plaguing the city.
How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.
Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - STEVE CARLSBERG
Who is on top? - Carlos
Who is the one to instigate things? - Cecil
How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now
How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head
How long do they normally last? - it really does depend.
Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - yes
How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.
How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 |4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.
How many children will they have naturally? - none
How many children will they adopt? - three, two boys and one girl.
Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - Carlos
Who is the stricter parent? - Cecil
Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Cecil (Carlos seems to encourage their stunts if anything).
Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - Cecil
Who is the more loved parent? - THEY ARE LOVED EQUALLY AS THE PERFECT PARENT UNIT
Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? - Cecil because he can trash talk any teachers who gives his children bad grades on the radio.
Who cried the most at graduation? - Cecil, he claimed it was an allergic reaction from petting Khoshekh beforehand.
Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - oh man oh man if the kids get in trouble with the Sheriff’s Secret Police then they are doomed and cannot be saved.
Who does the most cooking? - Carlos, he doesn’t do it well but he likes to experiment.
Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Cecil
Who does the grocery shopping? - Carlos
How often do they bake desserts? - all of the time, sometimes it’s all they eat
Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - they both like meat and salad and refuse to choose one alone, gosh, what sort of strict eating rule is this? did the mayor sign off on this as a law? if so Cecil is going to have to have a word.
Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Carlos
Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Cecil, especially when there’s a hot new bar being opned up serving flaming cocktails which made a man explode last week.
Who is more likely to burn the house down accidentally while cooking? - Carlos
Who cleans the room? - Cecil, Carlos is surprisingly messy.
Who is really against chores? - Carlos
Who cleans up after the pets? - Cecil
Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Carlos
Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Cecil
Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - the three headed dragon
Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Cecil, most of it is spent singing and doing his hair.
How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - the house is always decorated for all of the holidays all at once.
What are their goals for the relationship? - ALL HAIL THE GLOW CLOUD
Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Carlos (Cecil CANNOT sleep til noon, don’t you know he has a radio show to run)