But you see, it cannot bring back all the tears that had run out from my eyes. It cannot change all the sadness I’ve felt—the terrible feelings I tried to explain. You cannot just catch those waves with your hands and throw them to the ocean again. You cannot just pick those petals from a beautiful flower and regret it afterwards, wishing that maybe it will grow more stunning if you let it bloom on its own way. You cannot just let a bottle fall on the ground and decide to use it again even its sharp edges can painfully tear your palms. Because your sorry cannot change the past. Your sorry cannot change all the things you made me feel. You see, it’s different this time. You cannot just break someone’s heart and make them feel worthless that way—then put the blame on them. You cannot just say sorry for each and everything. You should have known that what you’ve done is wrong especially when you clearly did it intentionally. Especially when you did it selfishly.
I think that’s what scares me the most. When we speak, I lose sight of the things that hurt me. I focus on nothing but you because that’s all my mind will allow. The minute we stop talking, my mind fights my heart. I do my best to make sure that I don’t let my feelings get the upper hand, and if they do, I make sure you don’t know. Trust me, it’s better that you don’t know just how hopeful you make me. It hasn’t worked well in the past. There’s a chance that you can take this away from me, but I suppose I shouldn’t worry about that right now. Maybe the best thing to do is enjoy this peace while it lasts.