relapse 2

Help Me - Part 2

Bucky x Reader

Summary: Bucky has a bad nightmare which causes him to relapse, forcing the team to take action. The reader calms him down the only way she can

Word Count: 925

Warnings: Sad, scared Bucky

A/N: It’s a little short, but if I have some extra time today I might post something else. :) 

Originally posted by dailyteamcap

(GIF not mine, credit to owners)

Bucky’s relapse was a week ago and it was not easy, to say the least. Not only did he blame himself for the damage he caused, but you still haven’t told him of your “gift”. You wanted to tell him so badly, but you weren’t sure how to. Or even how he was going to react. In fact, you were scared shitless when it came to that. You and Bucky were together for a good while, and keeping this secret from him for so long, ate at your insides. You kept telling yourself that today was the day you were going to come clean and tell him everything. So what was holding you back?

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Relapse - Part 2

By: ProMarvelFanGirl

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warning: Fluff, body shaming, anxiety, topics of body size and weight issues. I tried to keep it as vague as possible so not to trigger.

Summary:  A Girl like her finally ended up with a guy like him.  Everything is perfect now and nothing can stop them except themselves.

A/n: This is the sequel to Girl Like Her (MasterList)  If you have any thoughts, suggestions, or feedback please let me know!


Part 1

You got off the elevator on your office floor.  Letting yourself in, you laid on your plush couch.  You wiped the tears from your eyes, taking care not to smudge your make up.  You knew if Bucky saw that he would do his best to reassure you, and you didn’t need him worrying about you.

After a little bit you got up from the couch and pulled yourself together.  This night was about Wanda, you could figure out what to do with yourself later.  Catherine’s words hurt, but what hurt more, was none of your friends immediately came to your aid.  They were your friends, weren’t they?  Little did you know it wasn’t what you thought.

After Catherine had ended her statement, everyone had looked at her in shock.  After realizing her statement was met with silence, she looked up to find Steve and Nat’s shocked faces, then turning to look at Sam with a questioning look.

“What? What did I say?”  She asked genuinely confused.   Sam shot a look at Steve, he had crossed his arms over his broad chest, chancing a glance at Nat, Sam saw her livid face.   Natasha rarely showed her emotions, but after what happened with Y/n all those months ago, she felt the need to protect her.

“Why would you say that about Y/n?”  Sam asked Catherine calmly, he really liked her and she was a great person he had no idea where this was coming from.

Catherine looked at Sam with confusion, “I just meant the way you all talk about her, how amazing you all find her, the picture in my head was different from what she looks like.”

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anonymous asked:

honestly.. that 2sec of supercorp saved me wow

im honestly not suicidal anymore that relapse 2 days ago nvr happened my grades r good my chem exam tmrw is gonna b fuckin easy m

Relapse Prevention 2

I posted about relapse prevention previously, but the handout from IOP was too long for one post. So to follow up on what relapse is and how to identify your “relapse signature”…

Questions to Consider in Identifying Warning Signs and Relapse Signature

  • What was the very first thing you noticed at the time?
  • What happened to the days and weeks leading up to your relapse?
  • When did you first know that you were unwell? How did you find out? Did anyone tell you they thought you were becoming unwell?
  • Did you go to the hospital? How? Did you avoid going to the hospital?
  • Were there any changes in your symptoms you noticed at the time? Were there any changes in your symptoms you did not notice at the time, but that you now think may have been warning signs?
  • Were there any changes in your mood/behavior that you noticed at the time? Were there any changes in your mood/behavior you did not notice at the time, but that you now think may have been warning signs?
  • What was the most obvious or severe change before your relapse?
  • What changes did you make? What happened next?

Strategies to Cope with Warning Signs

Coping with warning signs or relapse symptoms means something different for everyone. It may mean you do or do not do something, but generally it involves stress management techniques and distraction activities.

  • Reduce stress and stimulation
  • Do some relaxation - relaxing activities, exercising, playing sports, stay clam
  • Use self-talk
  • Use a diversion - a distraction, music, earphones/earplugs, meditation, TV, talk to someone
  • Initiate social contact
  • Do some reality testing
  • Note people’s advice
  • Try suppressive techniques - wear and flick a rubber band on your wrist, say “stop!” to symptoms
  • Seek assistance - tell someone, a friend, your doctor, therapist, case manager
  • Think positively
  • Keep taking your medication
  • Get more sleep
  • Plan your day
  • Engage in your action plan

It’s always important to have an action plan. Think about which coping strategies have worked for you and some you are willing to try, and remember that some strategies won’t always work, so have backups. Talk to your mental health therapist about helping you develop an action plan.

(source: Providence St. Vincent IOP handout 2015)

anonymous asked:

i just binged on 3000 cal after staying under 1000 all week and i feel so gross like i'm not trying enough this is my first relapse in 2 years and idk its consumed me all again

Sorry :( hope you can feel better soon 💕🌹

AsylumTale Relapse: Chapter 2

(5060 words)

Okay, so I had a burst of creative juices pound into my head and I finally finished this! I also, because of how the chapter turns out, decided to make this a three chapter thing. I hope you like it!


Okay, first of all, forgive me for reading it this late, there were some personal issues and had no time to get over the story.

Secondly: I must read the first part again, cause I not remember what happened earlier XP

And finally the big part. This story was AMAZING!!! Okay it had some tiny teeny grammar issues, but pffff I don’t mind, thanks to the way you built up the events. I really loved how you showed Asy’s agony and how much he hated the fact his condition got worse. (the ‘I wish I was dead’ segments were a bit harsh tho. He can be super depressed, but never wish for death) The way you portrayed his struggle, his fear and desperation was overall awesome. Seriously I felt sorry for him, my poor baby. I could point out every single scene and why they were great, but I don’t want to spoiler XP

So let me tell you, dear that you did an excelent job on this ‘short’ story and I’m eager to see the finale. Thank you so much for sharing me this marvelous idea!!! 

(you can read the story under the cut)

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anonymous asked:

Same person as relapse and 2 years thing. I've fallen back into depression like bad. I have body dysmorphic disorder and I've never been diagnosed as Anorexic, o bulimic but I it was a thing. I could never get help because my parents never knew. And they won't know. It's okay if I stop being healthy because at least only I will know. And I'll be happy and skinny.

I was in a very similar situation as you when I was younger. My parents didn’t know what was going on (they still don’t)
No one I know knows now except for my best friend
If you want to message me, I can talk to you anytime. I know you don’t want to be known but I’ve been in the exact same boat 💕

my dash has been full of hate for thirteen reasons why.
i loved that show.
i finished it about twenty minutes ago.
i cried.
many, many times.

and before you say that i liked it because i have never experienced shit like depression and suicidal thoughts/actions, let me inform you of some facts:
1. at age four i was first diagnosed with ocd, anxiety, and social anxiety
2. i relapsed at age twelve in sixth grade
3. when i was twelve, i also developed arfid, anorexia, depression, and my previously mention mental illnesses came back worse than ever.
4. in seventh grade, when i was thirteen, i ‘dabbled’ in self harm. i tried cutting a handful of times, which is still evidenced by the faint scars on my hips. i would pinch myself so tightly my wrists bled. (friends: dont worry, things have been fine, i havent done anything like this in more than two years)
sure, maybe suicide was romanticized a bit, but it was also addressed. rape was addressed. these things need to be talked about. so sorry, but if i see you reblogging shit about 13rw im going to unfollow you. sorry.

Three Things I Like About Myself

1. I am strong. I have and continue to overcome so many obstacles in my life, and I will stay open to recovery even when relapsing is easier.

2. I am funny. I have a great sense of humor, and I can make people laugh even when they’re in bad moods (including myself…). I might be very socially anxious and awkward, but I know people enjoy being around me.

3. I am passionate. If I see something that I have strong moral feelings about, I still will listen to others’ opinions and incorporate them into my perspective, but I will ultimately fight for what I believe is right.

10 years ago, my little brother suffered a central nervous system relapse 2 weeks before Christmas.

The doctors said there wasn’t much they could do and gave him less than 2 months to live.

I resolved that if it was going to be his last Christmas, I wanted it to be his best.

The best way I could describe that time in my family’s life is complete and utter darkness.

Yet we serve a mighty and loving God who says, “Let there be light.”

John is now a 21 year old man who is getting ready to graduate college.

Christmas is a beautiful reminder that day after day and night after night we receive the gift of hope through the heart of Jesus.

Even in our darkest moments, The King of Light tells us, “In this world you will have trouble, but do not be afraid. I have overcome the world.”

For years, I prided myself on being a perfectionist. I used to have a mantra:

“I strive for perfection because why should you aim for any less?”

For years I abused myself mentally and physically every time I’d make an error. Even the smallest mistakes represent massive failure when the only thing you’ll accept is perfect. I’ve learned that we will never find contentment, joy or satisfaction if the only thing good enough is perfection.

Perfection should never be your goal in weight loss or anything else! We only fail when it is. Love yourself to create and sustain change. When we try the other way around-changing because we think that somehow we’ll love ourselves in the end, we end up in one of two places: 1) giving up before our goal because we don’t love ourselves enough during the journey to keep going or 2) relapsing after hitting our goal because we don’t find love there immediately.

You are good enough already and you have everything you need to be successful. Take joy in progress and love the journey.

The results will come-even if they aren’t perfect.

Relapse Pt. 2

==You wake up hungover from the night before. Dean shows up like he said he would. You reconsider your relationship with him. 

++Dean x Reader | Fluffy goodness

A/N: If you want, listen to “Us Against the World” by Coldplay when you read this. It mayyy have influenced me a bit :)

Part 1 here 

There was a sound that jarred you out of the dream you were having. You sat up quickly - too quickly, actually. The room started spinning. “Oh man,” You rubbed your face, then attempted to look around your motel room again to find the source of the sound. It was silent and too dark to see. You grabbed your phone to check the time; it was 5:30 in the morning. Using the light from the screen you tried to illuminate the room, sure that you had heard something. When you saw the room was clear, you set the phone down and plopped back into the pillow. 

Wasn’t there something you had to do? You felt you were forgetting something, but you were so hungover that you chalked it up to the dream you had. You had called Dean in the dream, didn’t you? Yes, you did. He was angry with you, and told you to never call him again. Your heart leapt into your throat as you recalled the dream. 

“More like a fucking nightmare.” You mumbled. What even happened last night? You propped up on your elbow, checking your phone again. Turns out you had called Dean, and he called you back! Twice! “How drunk was I?” you dropped the phone and turned on the lamp next to the bed, glancing around the room again, and saw the half-empty bottle of rum. “Oh man,” you repeated, dumbfounded. “What did I do?" 

The door to your motel room swung open. Like second nature you had your gun in hand within moments, aiming it in that direction. 

"Woah woah woah!” Dean had peeked around the door, but he darted behind it as soon as he saw you. “It’s me,” He peeked around the door again, grinning. 

“Shit, sorry Dean.” You set the gun down and pulled the blanket over your chest as you watched him walk in with a bag in his hand. He set the bag down and looked at you, his face bright. 

“You don’t remember calling me, do you?” humor played in his voice. He walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. “How ya feeling?" 

That’s what you did. You invited Dean to come see you. "I’m…” You pondered a moment. How are you going to handle this? You missed Dean, that was certain. He obviously missed you too, since he’s here. You were able to fight off a lot of things, but your feelings for Dean didn’t want to go. You were able to bury them for a while, at best. “I’m glad you’re here.” You smiled. 

Dean swiped a piece of your hair behind your ear, “Me too, sweetheart.” He looked you over, most likely making sure you were okay. “You look good. Been looking out for yourself better than I thought you would." 

Your brows furrowed in confusion, "What’s that supposed to mean?" 

Dean smiled nervously. "I mean, I was worried about you… when you left. That’s all.” His eyes grew soft with sadness for a fleeting moment. “But you’re fine, obviously.” He was quiet for a few moments. “Oh,” that smile was back again and Dean hopped off the bed, going over to the bag he brought with him. 

“I got you something,” He pulled out a bottle of water, some headache medicine, and a tiny box. He went back to his place on the bed, handing these to you. “Thought you might need the water and medicine, after the night you had.” He chuckled. 

You picked up the little box and flipped it in your hand. “And this?”
“That’s uh… a birthday present.” Dean looked at the box and nodded, as if he was trying to believe that himself.

“Birthday present.” You squinted at Dean, “My birthday is months away." 

"I know that,” Dean laughed nervously again. You stared at him until he finally cracked. “Okay, okay. I just wanted to get you something for the hell of it. I think you’ll like it.” His eyes shined when he said this.

You sighed and pulled the little bow off the box, and opened it to reveal a ring. It looked familiar, and you glanced at Dean’s right hand. His ring was gone… this was his ring, the one he wore all the time when you first met him. 

“It’s uh,” Dean started before you had the chance to let the gesture sink in, “I know we aren’t together, and this is very… old school, but I wanted to give this to you as a promise ring. If you want it, that is.”

“Dean, this is so nice. I know this ring means a lot to you. But a promise ring? What exactly are you promising?” You picked the ring up, getting a good look at it. There were numerous scratches and gashes in the metal, surely from Dean wearing it for so long. You smiled, stroking the inside, which was still smooth. This ring was a lot like Dean. Rough, tough, and worn on the outside, but smooth and warm on the inside; ever shiny, untouched, and pure. 

“I w-want to promise that I’ll always protect you,” Dean reached for your hand. His hands were warm and slightly sweaty, probably from the nerves. “That I’ll always be there when you need me, and–” he sighed, stopping. “That’s if you even want it, (Y/n). I don’t know where we stand at this point. You hadn’t called for weeks until you were drunk. I don’t know what to make of that." 

You took a deep breath, thinking this over. Dean was right, you hadn’t contacted him until you were drunk off your ass. Does that mean you didn’t mean it, that you had just hit a weak point, or does that mean you truly need him? You already knew the answer. You didn’t need to be drunk to realize just how much you care for Dean. How much his jokes make you smile, no matter what mood you’re in. How his strong arms are always willing to hold you, protect you. How he can tell you exactly how he’s feeling just with a look. How sure you were that you and him were meant to be together. 

"It means that I want you,” you looked at Dean, slipping his ring on your finger. It was pretty loose, but it would stay. “It means that I want us.” you smiled, tears welling in your eyes. “That I want it to be us against the world.”  

Dean’s smile was priceless. He lifted your hand and kissed it, and pulled you into a hug. “You got it, babe. Us against the world, for as long as you’ll have me. I promise.”

“Well, I hope you’re willing to keep that promise for a long, long time.” You looked up and kissed him for the first time in a couple months. His lips were just as soft as you remembered them, and now you won’t ever have to forget.  

Vicodin’s like a nitrogen hydrogen vitamin
I bite into five and then I get high as a kite again
I like it when I get in my zone on the mic again
Who am I kidding? I couldn’t quit this shit if my life depends
I relapsed twice after I came outta Brighton then
Yeah, rehab’s nice, I had my name up in lights again
You see that’s why I can’t decipher what life I’m in
I might pull a knife on your wife and slice her and dice her then
It sounds so enticing, isn’t it nice when I’m hype again?
I’m nice when I’m like this, no time to write just type it in
If I could get my pen to slow down, what’d I write just then?
Man I’m about to hyperventilate, I just have hyper-tension
I have the type of mental state you couldn’t comprehend
Unusually stupid of you for you to think I’m your friend
I usually do what I do and suffer no consequence
I offer no mercy, the controversy is once again