I try not to post selfies all that often, but today I was kind of shocked that I like these. I decided that I wanted to push outside of my comfort zone and bought some liquid lipstick. I’m the kind of girl who never wears lipstick, and my best friend tends to make fun of me for not being the most knowledgeable in regards to makeup. Surprisingly, I didn’t suck at applying it, and I actually kind of like the way it looks!
On top of that, my teeth are one of my biggest insecurities. My mom couldn’t afford braces for me as a kid, and I’ll seldom take photos where I smile with my teeth. Again, I was shocked to have taken these and… actually kind of like them??
So here’s a test run of pushing out of my comfort zone: Gonna post these selfies and head out to visit some old coworkers with the lipstick on in public. 😅
Since I get so many questions regarding skin care and makeup, I’m going to list all of my favorite products here to make life a little easier. I’ll be linking any future questions on this topic to this list! :-)
I wasn’t really awake just yet,
but the feeling of arms wrapped around me made me open my eyes. I gasped as I
saw a shirtless chest right in front of my eyes. My face was resting on the
unfamiliar chest, and I could just make out a few tattoos on the rock-hard
chest. I slowly unwrapped the stranger’s arms from around my waist and crawled
out of bed, only to realize that I was naked. I screamed and hurried to grab
the covers from the bed and the stranger’s body. The scream must have woken him
up, and that’s when I realized that I had slept with Justin! Justin was laying
fully exposed in front of me and I couldn’t help myself, I studied his body
happened?” Justin asked as he rubbed his eyes, he still hadn’t noticed
that he was naked. When I didn’t answer him, he finally looked at me. He
furrowed his eyebrows as he realized that I was looking intensely at him, then
he looked down and hurried to cover his private area. “Did we…” he
didn’t dare to finish the sentence because he knew we had. I hurried to grab
all my clothes, then I went into the nearest bathroom and got dressed. I didn’t
even know where I was, I just knew that I had to get out of there.
please open the door, we need to talk about this” Justin said as he
continuedly knocked on the bathroom door. I had just pulled on my jeans and was
only wearing my bra, but I decided on opening the door anyway. Immediately
Justin came into the room, then he pushed me against the nearest wall and
crashed his lips onto mine. I moaned at the feeling on the cold wall against my
naked back, which gave Justin access to my mouth completely.
tell me you don’t regret our night together” he pleaded as we pulled
apart. I looked down and shook my head. “I’m still very disappointed in
what you did, but as I recall, last night was pretty amazing” I whispered
to him, then I hugged him tight. “You’ve got every right to be
disappointed, but as I told you last night, I will do anything to make it all
up to you,” he told me, then he pecked my neck repeatedly. “Now let
me take you home to get showered, then we’re going on a date,” he told me.
I pulled away from him, then I put on my shirt and jacket. “Okay,” I
was currently getting ready to go on a date with Justin. I was really excited,
and that was very easy to tell.
had told me to dress casually, therefore I was dress in a pair of black jeans,
an off-shoulder blouse in black, a pair of baby pink sneakers and a floral
printed headband. I decided to try my best, regarding makeup. I even put on a
pair of false eyelashes to make my eyes pop. I also wore a whole bunch of
jewelry in silver to go with both my clothes, but also my skin type.
car horn was heard outside, Justin was here. I smiled to myself, then I grabbed
my phone, sunglasses, and bag and then I ran down the stairs.
is at the door?” mom asked as I made it downstairs. I smiled and started
blushing lightly. “Justin” I then casually said which made her smirk.
“Oh, just Justin?” she asked with the smirk still playing on her
lips. I nodded my head, then hurried out of the door before she could embarrass
me even more.
was standing outside his car waiting for me, and when he saw me, he hurried to
walk up to me. He placed a gentle kiss on my cheek, then grabbed my hand as I
blushed rather hard. We got into Justin’s car, and then as we drove off, Justin
waved at my mom in the window, talk about being embarrassed.
so I thought we should be tourists for a day,” Justin said as we drove out
of town. “I thought it would be great to get away from normal, therefore
we’re going to LA” Justin placed a hand on my lap and then looked at me.
do you say?”.
placed a hand on top of his, then nodded my head. “I like that idea”.
drove for an hour just listening to music and talking about everything and
anything. I hadn’t been in LA that many times, but I certainly enjoyed being
there. “How about we start at the Hollywood sign?” I asked Justin.
Justin nodded his head and then took a turn to the right. We parked at the
bottom of the mountain and got out of the car. Justin grabbed a few things from
the trunk, then he came up to me and grabbed my hand. We stood still for a few
minutes just staring at the big sign then slowly we started walking closer to
the sign. It took us a while to get up to the sign, but when we did, it was
had brought us some sparkling wine along with some
chocolate-covered-strawberries. We sat down on top of the sign and enjoyed the
food and drink. “I got to ask you something,” I said to Justin after
a long pause of silence. Justin gulped and nodded his head. “Why did you
do it?” I asked him. The question had been stuck in my head for days, and
I really wanted an answer to fully forgive him. “I honestly don’t
know,” he told me, which made me sigh sadly. I figured that would be his
answer. “I guess I was just tired of hearing the guys talk badly about you
because let’s face it, you’re the most beautiful girl in the world” he
then continued. My feelings were getting completely mixed now. “I wanted
to make then realize that you weren’t just the nerd and the nobody because I
had seen how you could just let go and be yourself when you were at home”
he continued. I still said nothing. “Every night I would watch you as you
got ready to go to bed. You would listen to your favorite music, and you would
sing along, especially to ‘hall of fame’ or 'superheroes’ because that’s your
favorite band” he said with a smile, and finally, I also smiled. “I
didn’t know you knew this much about me,” I told him honestly. “You
would never look at me, which made me want to get your attention even more, and
eventually that lead to the whole bet,” he told me. That’s when I did it,
I finally kissed him again, the one single thing I had wanted to do all day but
hadn’t dared to do. Justin was caught off guard, and it took him a few seconds
to kiss back, but when he did, he gave all of him to me.
pulled apart and just stared into each other’s eyes. “I know I still have
to earn your trust, but I need you to trust me when I say that I love
you,” Justin said. I covered my mouth with my hand as I gasped. He loved
me? “Will you be my girlfriend?” he then asked me. I was still very
speechless and decided on nodding my head instead of trying to answer. Justin
smiled widely, then he pulled me close and hugged me tightly. Afterward, Justin
pulled a jewelry box out of his pocket, which made me furrow my eyebrows.
“I’ve gotten you a promise ring, where I promise you that I will remain
faithful, to want you forever, to one day pop the actual question, to keep your
secrets and to always let you know that I love you,” he said. The ring was
very simple and it had a knot on it to resemble to promise to pop the question
someday in the future. I awed, then I let him put the ring on my finger. I
pulled Justin in for a kiss to tell him thank you, and he sure understood the
intention because a few seconds later, I was laying on the ground while Justin
was on top of me.
had really been the best day of my life, and even though I knew Justin and I
would have our ups and downs, I knew in that moment, that I loved the man in
front of me.
Last part was supposed to be published hours ago, but apparently my scheduled time was not right, so I apologise for that ♡
―― We’d like to hear about the opinion of male members regarding women’s makeup.
All: Please treat us well!
―― Honestly speaking, how much do men care about women’s makeup?
Atae: I don’t pay attention at all…. (sweats)
Hidaka: Me too, I’m not very confident about this. I do look at the overall aura but I guess there aren’t a lot of guys who look into details that much?
Nishijima: I, on the contrary, look though. Since it’s the eyes that match my line of sight, I’m particularly concerned with the feeling eyes give.
Sueyoshi: If I were to say what’s my favorite part, I guess it’s the skin. I like people with beautiful skin, so even when it comes to makeups, that image where you can see through her is my type ne.
Atae: about the “beautiful skin”, I think I’m the same~ how should I put this, there’s a feeling of richness….
Atae: That’s it, I like people with vibrant skin!
Naoya: For me, rather than parts, I’m weak when it comes to “gap”. For example, she usually has no makeup or does a normal one, and then suddenly she puts effort in her makeup and had a change of vibe, it makes my heart throbs. Depending on her outfit, “today I aim for the pretty image”, or “today, it’s the cool type”, it hits home when she gives different impressions.
Nishijima: I get that. When she’s feeling rock-ish, wearing leather jacket, she puts red lipstick, or when she’s wearing knits, she’ll be a chic in light colors. People who change clothes for that day or make-up according to time, place, and occasion makes me think that “ah, she’s properly thinking about the makeup as part of her fashion”.
Hidaka: Though basically, natural makeup is nice, ne.
Sueyoshi: Right, even before, I think guys like makeup that aren’t all dolled-up.
―― Looks like that part is unanimous ne. Well then, what’s your definition of “natural”?
Sueyoshi: I don’t like it when her lips are too dark, and if she likes putting no makeup then I’m totally fine with it…
Urata: Surely, women who says to herself, “I think this much will do”, that face is natural?
Hidaka: I guess so, even if there’s not much emphasis, I don’t dislike it when it’s just a slight color. I think light colors that becomes a point in makeup is wonderful.
Nishijima: I get it. Let’s make it like this, a “15-minute makeup” is natural! Wash her face, put skin care products then the base of her makeup, then eyeliner, then finish everything in a total of 15 minutes.
Hidaka: But I heard that “doing a natural makeup surprisingly takes time”, you know (laughs).
Urata: it seems that it takes time to make yourself look like you’re not wearing any makeup.
Atae: It’s hard being a woman… (laughs).
Hidaka: Then I guess, maybe the point is “not easily ruined”. If you’re wearing dark makeup, you’ll definitely be concerned if it’ll wear off, so makeup that won’t easily wear off is natural, I think.
Thanks so much for your patience guys. Enjoy some fratty bratty harry with fratty niall and art student zayn ;)
The kiss stayed with you through to the morning,
instantly awakening you with the thought of how his lips had felt heatedly
pressed against yours - hungry, savory, soft. He’d been gentle with you,
but dominating. Dominating in the most comforting of ways. And as
cheesy as it seemed to be, you had been putty in his strong, capable hands.
With cheeks flushed from drifting thoughts, you ghosted your hand where
his once cupped your cheek and you could almost imagine it was his instead, but
when your fingertips traveled to touch your lips, the tingle he’d left and the
burn in your stomach he’d ignited was just out of reach. And when your
hand fell to touch your throat where he had pressed a luscious kiss, you felt
the crusty trickle of blood that had caused him to retreat. A frown
befell your face and an onslaught of sensations took over as the memories from
the alley came back to you full-force, the grubby hands pressing you against
one’s bony chest, the glint of the sharp blade, the sickly sweet cologne and
the moisture from his breath that had hit your neck. There was a cold
chill and you shivered even though just two minutes ago you’d woken up sweating
under the blankets. When you rolled over to see Renny’s bed empty there
was a sudden slam in the bedroom that made you jump and your adrenaline
skyrocketed as you froze beneath the sheets. It was the blinds, only
the blinds, you told yourself. They’d just slammed against the window
from a draft. The beating of your heart was still pounding and your
eyebrows knitted together as it hit you that you were very much alone.
She’d left for class already. An
obnoxiously bright orange note card was taped to the side of your desk and you
stretched your arm as far as it could while staying buried beneath the
protection of the covers.
I miss you :( TELL ME
EVERYTHING WHEN I GET BACK
btw it’s back-to-school
theme for the sorority party tonight so…prepare the slutty outfit and what
you’re going to say to make me look good ;)
Your eyes shot to the clock and you froze.
It was 7:45. When the shutters slammed against the window again and
your heart dropped for the second time this morning, you knew you couldn’t stay
here. You may fail the stupid test and Harry may be annoyed that you
didn’t stay, but you wouldn’t be able to sleep again. As silly as it
sounded you wouldn’t be able to fall asleep even if you checked under your bed
and swept the closet five times over to make sure no one was there. You
felt so vulnerable alone, and your mind kept drifting to that night.
You wouldn’t be able to fight the memory.
You had fifteen minutes.
With no regard to yesterday’s makeup you threw
on jeans and a sweatshirt, even though the clouds from yesterday were long
gone. You may be sweating on your way over to class, but you didn’t want
the world to see you today. You’d just thrown up your hood and the door
was closing behind you when you froze- the blood. It was still on your
neck. And with a sinking feeling in your gut, the thud of the closing
door sealed your sentence. You’d left your keys in the pocket of your
sweats from last night and there was no way you could get back in to wash it
off. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you cursed, wiggling the doorknob to no avail. You
weren’t one to cuss, hardly ever, and you weren’t sure what you were hoping for
in jiggling the locked door, but- fuck.
In a panicked fast-walk to class, you tried
rubbing your neck to try and get the evidence to fade but all it left you with
was irritated skin probably reddening from the burn you were creating.
People seemed to be staring at you more today as you picked up your fast
walk to an awkward fast jog and as disgusting as it was, you licked your hand
and started desperately rubbing again. You winced a bit as you felt the
sting from the cut, the slight injury reacting with the dampness in bristling
Your head was a dark cloud of anxiety, stress,
and fear and when you burst through the doors of lecture hall with a minute to
spare, your thoughts turned impossibly darker.
Harry was leant back looking effortlessly
alluring in a snapback and partially unbuttoned flannel, with a girl
stood between his legs. His hands were casually gripping the edge of the
extended table while her hip was popped out in the way that made her butt look
bigger and her waist, smaller. You knew that pose, you did it too.
She said something to him that caused him to smirk and he nodded his head
with a shrug of his broad shoulders while she giggled in excitement. The
same shoulders that had been hovering over you, bare, just hours before…
The instant bitter spark of anger erupted and
your natural reaction was outrage at this blatant betrayal, but then, you
realized, what was he betraying? The anger was no match for the larger
flood of disappointment that followed not even two seconds after. You
thought he’d be worried about you, you realized. After last night, you’d
thought he’d stay the same warm, gentle person when the sun showed its face
again. You’d forgotten who he was. What he was.
He wasn’t going to change, nor was he going to just flip a switch
and become solely focused on you of all people because he’d stopped
those men from taking advantage of you. Any decent person would’ve done
Wasn’t that what your mother always told you
when a check bounced? Don’t fall in love with a man you think you can
change, because no one will change fundamentally. Unless, of course, he
had money. Then, she’d told you, it didn’t really matter if he changed or
not because money could afford you all sorts of distractions. Security
first, love secondary. You’d listened with open ears when your father
wasn’t around, letting it come in one ear and out the other. That was
just your mother though.
She’d never read the love stories you had.
A part of you was reminded of Harry’s intensity,
how each time his fist met the other man it had been so calculated and filled
with unchecked rage. Something was telling you that not any person
would’ve done what Harry did. That a person mentally couldn’t have
done most of it.
For an irrational reason, anger struck up again.
Harry didn’t have to do any of it.
And he definitely didn’t need to spend the
But that’s why he’d honestly asked you to
“tutor” him wasn’t it? He’d gotten what he’d wanted, hadn’t he?
He’d gotten to kiss you and you’d given in. His sweet words were
just a cherry on top. Blatantly meaningless as he continued to charm the
girl who he clearly already had under his thumb.
You’d pushed the door harder than expected and
it slammed shut, causing all heads to turn towards you.
The make-out chick Harry had been with the night
of the party was staring at you with crystal blue eyes, doing a once over at
the weird hooded girl glaring at the entrance before turning back to look at
Harry. But he was still looking at you.
Harry’s brows immediately drew together and he
gave an irritated shake of his head that screamed “what the fook are yeh
doing here?” It made your skin crawl how you could already picture
his voice so perfectly in your head, and you hated knowing it wasn’t going
anywhere anytime soon. You only had the energy to fake a smile when the
professor cheekily said “So nice of you to join us Y/N.” The girl standing
in front of Harry started walking away at his sudden disinterest and you almost
wanted to comfort her, hell, you could make a lot of money off a Harry support
group. You’re sure many girls needed it after dealing with the
ever-shifting enigma that is Harry Styles.
You heard Harry call your name as you passed
him, but you ignored it, for once gracefully walking a little faster when you
saw him unsuccessfully reach for you in the corner of your eye.
Niall was the one who sat at the end of the
aisle and reached a hand out to stop you before you could descend and get away.
“Hey, what’s wrong with your neck?” His
voice held traces of concern, but it was a question asked out of selfish
“Allergic reaction,” you lied.
“Yikes, you allergic t’a good make out then?” he
teased before breaking out into a snicker at your furrowed brows. He
hadn’t. He…he wouldn’t have -
You immediately looked to Harry and his eyes had
darkened, all the proof you needed, and you hoped your death glare transferred
through the sizzling line of energy that seemed to pop up whenever you looked
at each other. That cocky, bragging, arrogant son of a…
Imagine Kris showing up to work with horseshoe-shaped bruises on his body. He plops into the makeup chair and regards the makeup artist with a swollen eye that passes for an evaluating squint. “I advise you against any inquires related to…” he gingerly gestures to his countenance, “…all this shit.”
so i’ve gotten TONS of questions regarding makeup for prom and because i don’t have time, I’m hoping that this post helps all of you guys and remember that this isn’t only for prom, i’d wear any of these to any special occasion too :)
EYES look 1: matte neutral cut crease with winged eyeliner look 2 (warm): matte earth toned (reds, orange) brown smoky eye with gold center of lids look 3 (cool): matte taupe (purpley, grey) toned smoky eye with silver center of lids look 4: dark brown/black smoky eye blended with warm or cool toned browns look 5: shimmery browns smoked out and dark eyeliner on bottom blended with dark brown look 6: any color on lid (match it to your dress maybe) and matte browns in crease, dark brown/black in outer v look 7: medium matte brown on lid blended, winged eyeliner and any color on lower lash line look 8: wing eyeliner blended with matte dark brown and black eyeshadow look 9: neutral eyes with glitter eyeliner on top of regular eyeliner
CHEEKS • if your dress is a warm color (like orange, pink, red, peach, gold, etc) then i recommend a blush that has a similar undertone to it so corals, peaches, warm bronze, warm pinks
• and if your dress is more green, blue, navy, silver, purple etc i recommend blue toned pinks, mauve, soft plums
• sticking to a rosy shade would be safe choice if you’re skeptical about blush
• if your eyes are shimmery go for a matte blush, and viceversa
LIPS • if you used a lot of colors on your eyes, or have a bright dress i recommend glossy nude lips
• if you went dark on the eyes, i recommend a MLBB lipstick (medium pinks, muted roses, muted reds, soft mauves)
• if you’re wearing neutral or no eyeshadow, and a dress that isn’t so bright, i recommend bold lips like reds, vampy shades, fuschia, etc
if you have any specific questions please ask :)))
The social consequences i or other trans women face regarding makeup, facial hair, stubble, and even the appearance of facial bone structure are so severe.
Appearance, cosmetics, makeup, etc: It’s not about what is “empowering” or not. It’s about what we’ve been socially conditioned to do, what we’re being effectively threatened into doing, and even how social conditioning can affect what we enjoy.
Depending on the context, the joy I feel from putting on a full face of makeup and making myself look conventionally attractive and fit into the standards of cosmetic appearance of cis women could be compared to the joy I’d get from someone handing me a handful of cash.
The enjoyment isn’t a “natural” phenomenon, the very existence of the object that is being enjoyed (cosmetics or cash) is something whose existence is specific to our society, and the way that that object interacts with me (capitalism, wage labor, neoliberalism, beauty standards, misogyny, transphobia) is also specific to our society.
((Regarding the cosplay makeup: I have never done my own makeup myself beyond lip gloss and eyeliner like twice. This had foundation, eyeshadow, lipstick, and blush. Lolol apparently I’m naturally good at makeup without tutorials. At least I think I did a good job with it.)
Anon: somebody that i used to know was gr8 m8. lmao. anyways, can you do a “We don’t talk anymore” (by Charlie Puth ft. Selena Gomez) Dan x reader songfic? ^~^
A/N: I hope this okay, I know the story is a little out there, but I Like to be different where I can. Enjoy! xx
I climbed out of my car and saw the studio ahead of me. Today i was getting a photo shoot done and to be honest, I was pretty excited. The concept that professionals got to dress me up and place the best that make up has to offer and all I get to do is create photo’s for both myself and my job, It was a very exciting thing.
When I first walked inside, the place was absolutely amazing. There were at least 2 other shoots going on at the time and there was a vacant shoot ready to go over towards the left, so I was guessing that it was where I was meant to be. As I started to walk over to the photographer who is setting everything up, I glance over to the other photo shoots going on, I notice someone, someone that I used to be close to, and now I had a cold sensation running through my body with a slight pang in my heart.
“We don’t talk anymore. We don’t talk anymore. We don’t talk anymore, Like we used to do”
He was currently getting his photo taken with Phil in very strange ways that was not even relatively close to what they normally do in regards to photos.Phil was in a bright red shirt, whereas he was in his typical plain black shirt, he always had a thing with black being that it was one of his favourite colours. I went to look away from the both of them, but I just couldn’t seem to do it quick enough because his once sensitive eyes, turned in my direction and widened as we caught each other in vision. He was now distracted from his shoot, the photographer telling him to look back at the lens. I tried to brush him off, I needed to prove that he wasn’t under my skin anymore, but so far that wasn’t proving successful.
I stopped in front of my photographer who seemed very pleased to see me. I he extended his arm out for me to shake and so I took it with a smile on my face. He talked with such a smooth french accent and I could see the muscles through his shirt, If I wasn’t distracted by Dan right now, I probably would have swooned at the sight of him.
“So Make up will take you just to the seat over there and when they are done, costumes will be ready, then we can get started. We have the whole day so I would rather not rush for perfection, okay?”
“Sounds good, Let’s get to it”
I dropped my bag beside the chair and climbed into it, The make up artist was talking to the photographer about designs, so I just sat there patiently, but for some reason I couldn’t take my eyes away from Dan.
“We don’t laugh anymore, What was all of it for. Ohh, we don’t talk anymore, like we used to do…”
I ripped my gaze away from Dan and looked ahead of me, there was a woman who clearly had a knack for dressing up in the 50′s era, but she looked all so pretty. With the click of her heels, she walked towards me and extended her hand for me to shake.
“(Y/n), darling, I’m Cassandra and I’ll be taking care of you in regards to makeup. This is a photo shoot for You tube and they want to experiment with some looks for everyone. For you, we’re going to glam you up for elegance first, and then I’ll ship you off to outfits where they have some beautiful things for you to try on. sound okay?”
“That sounds great”
She smiled towards me and then started opening all the things in her make up kits, brushes, pots, shades that would match my skin tone, it was all a little overwhelming. I hear laughing coming from the distance and I look over in there direction, they’re acting like absolute goofballs, it reminded me of the way we used to be, but not anymore. Dan looked over towards me, and unsettling smile that was fading on his face from the laughter he was sharing with Phil. I sighed and looked away, taking my attention to my phone. I rested my elbow on the arm of the chair then used my hand to hold my chin, Dan being here was really bringing down my mood. This was supposed to be such a great opportunity and experience, but I felt like that feeling was long gone just knowing that he was here too, but I should have at least suspected it, he was one of you tube’s overlords after all.
Cassandra told me to look ahead so that she could focus on my face. She showed me a reference she needed to work with and it was actually really gorgeous. concealed, perfectly highlighted and contoured, a light and shimmery eye shadow with immaculate winged eyeliner and a nice bold red lip that has darker undertones to make the centre of my lips look bright. I was so ready for this. I sat back in the chair and relaxed myself, and before I knew it, We were already at work.
“I just heard you found the one, you been looking. You been looking for. I wish I would have known that wasn’t me”
“Can you turn your face to the left honey?”
I did as she said and watched Dan and Phil as she started to blend out the foundation on my face. Dan stepped out of his photo shoot and behind the camera, I was guessing that they wanted single shots of the two of them as well as together, as much as they had become a brand, they were still their own people. Cassandra tilted my head towards the front again, then moved my head to the right. She blends the foundation around my jawline and around my hairline then works on her blending around the rest of my face, it’s surprising how delicate her touch is as she works on me. When she takes her hands off me for those few brief minutes to grab the next set of things, I look back over to see Dan with her and because of that my heart sinks.
She’s a young blonde,doe-eyed little thing, about 18-19. She has a light touch to her skin, something that looks as soft as silk and I envied her so greatly. Not because of who she was, but simply because she has what used to be mine. If I would have allowed myself to in that moment, I probably would have cried, but because of the situation I was in, I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to ruin Cassandra’s work. I took a deep breathe and carefully watched them without trying to be noticed, but when I looked over at Phil, I couldn’t help but give him such a sad look then hang my head down low. I felt pathetic. As Cassandra came back, I lifted my head and just sat there quietly as she started to go over the contour. She was wanting to talk about everything in my life that revolved around my love life, but I just couldn’t talk to her about it, because it pained me so much.
She gave me a mirror when she finished with the contour so that I could see everything so far and I already looked 20 times better than I would on any other day of the week. It surely gave me the confidence boost I so desperately needed in that moment, but I knew I would feel so much better about myself when she actually finished, hell even when I was ready to shoot because I would be so glamorous, but those thoughts soon faded every time I glanced over to Dan and his new girl.
“Cause even after all this time, I still wonder, Why I can’t move on. Just the way you did so easily”
Do you know what hurts more than just knowing the person you love has already moved on so shortly after falling apart? Finding out that it only takes them one week for the love you once shared to become void. And that’s what happened to me. I walked over to Dan and Phil’s apartment to go and collect some of my things, nothing too harmful. A simple task that people do after breaking up. I walked up the mountain that those two called stairs and knocked on their front door loud enough for someone to notice me. I could hear the patter of feet coming down the stair case, but it sounded more like skipping than they heavy footed nature of two tall boys.
A woman opens the door, and she’s in one of Dan’s shirts. It’s hanging down to her thighs and from what I can see, there′s no shorts underneath. I was devastated. She is looking at me with wide eyes, she clearly has sex hair too, so that isn’t helping the way I feel either. but when she spoke, she had an innocence to her that made it extremely hard to hate her.
“Can I help you?”
“I’m looking for Dan”
“And who might you be sweetheart?”
“Just a friend, I’m here to pick up a few things for a friend”
I didn’t have the heart to tell her who I was, it’s not like it mattered anyway. She climbed back up the stairs to go and fetch Dan, and in those few minutes of absence I let out the few tears needed to keep myself standing strong when he arrived. He looked rather surprised to see me, I don’t think it had set in that I’d seen his new play thing, but I didn’t care at that point.
“(Y/n), what are you doing here?”
“I came to get my things”
“Oh, I’ll go and get them, just wait here.”
I sighed and leaned against his front door. I just wanted to get out of here so I could go a cry into a pillow, I just honestly couldn’t believe that I mattered so little to him. He came back down with a box of my things and I took it out of his hands, I turned around to go back down the stairs, but He stopped me half way down.
“(Y/n), I’m sorry”
“For what Dan, the fact that we didn’t work out in the end, or that it only took you a week to move on?”
He didn’t answer the question but simply looked down and to me, that was already the answer, so I continued down the stairs and didn’t look back, but when I think it over, I can never tell what it was that caused us to separate, we were great together.
“Don’t wanna know, Kinda dress you’re wearing tonight. If he’s holdin onto you so tight, The way I did before”
Dan’s girlfriend, what was her name.. Candice. She wrapped her arms around Dan’s waist and pulled him in. Thank god that my view was pulled away by Cassandra, because I wasn’t sure how much longer I could sit through this. This was torture of an emotional standard and I wasn’t a very strong person. Not anymore.
“Eyes down honey”
I lowered my eyes until they were at a close and exhaled again, I was relaxed at the start of this, but as I continued to think over Dan, I was becoming more and more on edge. I didn’t want to think about him, I didn’t want to think about his girlfriend and I definitely didn’t want to think about the ways that he touched her, it made my stomach churn.
I felt the light taps of the eye shadow, covering my eyes lids and then the soft, light touch of a blending brush, it was actually quite nice. She told me to open my eyes so she could get a look and when I did, she had a bright smile going on. I closed my eyes once more so she could put on the eye liner and then matched with a blush, I was set to go.
I stood up and took the mirror that was on the stand, I looked beautiful, not something I felt I could say too often, but at the moment, I just felt beautiful. A smile washed over my face and I giggled with such glee. My gaze was taken over towards Dan and Phil, they were now swapping positions so that Dan was in front of the camera, and Phil was behind. Phil glanced over towards me and I smiled which apparently signaled for him to make his way towards me. I had to take my seat again so they could start on my hair, but Phil walked up next to me and took my hand, just holding it and giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“How are you doing, (Y/n)?”
“Honestly Philly, I’ve been better”
“I’m sorry, I really am”
“Phil, Can I ask a question?”
“Is he happy… with her?”
Phil gave a sad look and then looked down at his feet, shuffling them about. That was all I needed to know.
“I overdosed. Shoulda known your love was a game. Now I can’t get you out of my brain, Ohh, it’s such a shame”
The next woman took over and started to work on my hair, placing it into sections for straightening and then running a curler through the ends.I looked so glammed up, I looked like I was going to be a part of a 1920′s era and I was loving every second on it, just not as much as I thought I would. I started to take my thoughts away from reality again and think about Dan and I. If we were still together, I could be doing this with him, but it just didn’t play out that way.
I snapped from my thoughts and looked up at Phil who was now giving me a concerning look. I squeezed his hand and then looked straight forward.
“You’re not okay, are you?”
My heart began to beat fast as I thought about everything that’s happened, it was like little pieces of all the bad things in my life were coming together in fragments, but a majority of the flashes were faces of Dan and I in our unhappy times.
“I’m not okay”
“That we don’t talk anymore. We don’t talk anymore. We don’t talk anymore, Like we used to do”
Phil kissed the back of my hand and then got called back to his set, I knew he had a job to do, so I understood. It didn’t take too long but the hairstylist finished my hair, giving it such volume and life, I’ve never had it feel so soft before. I got up out of the chair and then set course for the outfit department. I took a breath because I needed to walk past Dan. I wasn’t ready for it, but I had to go and get changed. One step after the other, I slowly made my way towards Dan. When I got rather close to him, he managed to catch wind that someone was walking towards him and looked in my direction, his eyes diverting straight to mine, but they looked different, but I just couldn’t read into them. I flashed a small but non-confident smile towards him and then walked away, heading into the change room.
I walked into the room with a sad look on my face, I didn’t feel much like being here right now, maybe I should have just set this up for another time, but it was too late now, they have already put so much work into me that it would be a waste to just go home now. A woman walked up to me with a measuring tape hanging around her shoulders, her skin was dark, it complimented her features quite well, and she had a tattoo of a rose on her arm. Her eyes were dark and warm, they reminded me of Dan. She didn’t say a word but just got to work, taking in my measurements, around the bust, hips and waist, then shuffled around the outfits to find something suitable. About 10 minutes later she comes back with a whole stack of things in her arms and hands them over to me, pointing over to a dressing room for me to go and try things on.
I walked into the change room and placed everything onto the vacant hooks on the wall. I scanned over the outfits, overalls, jumpsuits, ravishing dresses, there was so much to choose from. I decided to try on a silver dress that went down to the floor, covered in sequins. The dress shimmered and looked absolutely gorgeous. With a deep v neck to the chest, for me it was simply perfect to suit my hair and make up. It took some time but when I eventually squeezed myself into the dress, I looked at myself in the mirror. It fit my body nicely, and I looked gorgeous. I picked up the dress so that I wouldn’t walk on it and stepped out to show the designer
“So what do you think?”
She turned around and looked at me, giving me a soft smile, She put her finger up which I was guessing means wait here, because she sort of just left in a hurry. She comes back with a pair of black heels and a grey faux fur shawl that wraps around my shoulders. I wrapped the shawl over my shoulders and had the designer put the heels on the ground so that I could slip my feet into them. I did a spin around for the designer and she gave me a smile before pointing out the door. I guess it was time to have my picture taken.
“We don’t laugh anymore. What was all of it for? Oh, we don’t talk anymore, Like we used to do”
When I stepped out into that room, it was like slow motion, I felt so amazing. Eyes started to fall on me from all directions as I walked over to my photographer, even the eyes of Dan. My eyes crossed him as I started to get closer and his jaw had dropped, probably because I never usually looked this good, but It was good to see him like this, kind of a show him what he’s missing type moment. I looked over towards Phil who also looked a little bit shocked and gave him a wave with a flash of a smile, who gave me a smile and a wave in return, I was still glad that he was there for me in spite of everything. I mean, normally the best friend sticks with the person they’ve known the longest, so knowing he still cared was nice.
I stood in front of my photographer who looked so pleased to see me. He took my hand and directed me over to in front of the camera where I would be posing for photos.
“Okay, so I’m going too set up the lenses for the camera and we will get started, sound okay?”
I smiled as the photographer walked away but when I looked a little to my left, Dan’s girlfriend was glaring at me like a cat with sharpened claws, and it wasn’t a very pleasing look. She glanced back at Dan who was still staring at me and then she glared at me, crossing her arms in disgust. I took a breath and positioned myself in front of the camera as my photographer was now ready.
“Okay sweetheart, can I get you to face the backdrop, but then look over your shoulder towards the camera”
I positioned myself as he said with a smile on my face. He took a few photos and then looked above the camera.
“That’s great, keep going, you can move about if you want”
I let the shawl drop slightly so that my shoulders were more exposed, I looked over my shoulder a little more, looking more off into the distance, but when I saw Dan standing behind the Photographer, My smile simply disappeared from my face, making me look sad and rather lost.
“I just hope you’re lying next to somebody. Who knows how to love you like me. There must be a good reason that you’re gone”
“That facial expression sweet”
I snapped out of my gaze towards Dan and looked at the photographer.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I was just thinking about something, someone.”
“Sweetheart, keep working with it, because the photos are turning up great”
I decided not to think about Dan and just keep working the camera. I smiled towards the camera and I slowly slid the shawl off my shoulders. I tossed it over behind the camera and turned towards the camera. I closed my eyes and started running my fingers through my hair as I heard the constants snaps of the camera.
“Come on, work it honey.”
I opened my eyes and looked into the camera. giving a small smile. I was enjoying myself despite the fact that Dan was constantly hovering around, it was like I couldn’t breathe without him being there. I would have told him to go away or go back to his own shoot, but honestly I just didn’t even know how to talk to him anymore, I was so shy and hurting from everything that it was even a task to look at him. He had a sad look on his face, something that looked similar to regret, if that was not the look itself, but it was his fault. I wasn’t even the one that gave up on us.
I asked the photographer to stop for a second, My thoughts were becoming to much. I took a breather and came back strong, I was just going to pretend that Dan wasn’t here.
“Every now and then I think you might want me to, Come show up at your door. But I’m just too afraid that I’ll be wrong”
I remember that he showed up at my apartment one day, It was spring and the weather was dreary, raining like normal. I was cuddled up with a blanket, watching TV with a cup of hot chocolate attached to my palms. I was wearing a knitted sweater that was green, like khaki, I remember it because I wore it a lot during those days, the sweater made by my Grandma before she passed.
There was a knock on the door that I didn’t recognize, It sounded so boring and lifeless, I looked at the door pretty confused and pulled back the blanket, getting up from the sofa. As I walked over towards the front door, I placed my mug on the dining table and put on my slippers, it was cold after all. I opened the door and Dan was standing there before me, the umbrella in his hand was dripping from the rain, I invited him into my home and kissed him with a smile on my face, but it didn’t last long before he pulled me back.
“Look I can’t stay long. I just needed to tell you something”
“Oh. Are you okay?”
“Actually no. Look. You and I aren’t working like we used to. And well, I just don’t think we should be together anymore.”
Those words rang through and hit me so hard. I looked away from him and closed my eyes, I wasn’t going to let him see me cr. I took a few deep breaths and then turned back to him, my eyes were slowly starting to well up.
“I uh. What?”
“Please don’t make me say it again”
“Why are you giving up on us?”
“Because we aren’t (Y/n) and Dan anymore. We haven’t been for a while, so we need to move on”
I started to chew on my nails, I did that when I was stressed. I knew it was a bad and disgusting habit, but sometimes I just couldn’t control myself. I told him to leave and so he did. I closed the door behind me and locked myself away in my room where I sobbed and cried, throwing pillows all over the place, needless to say I was now an emotional mess. My eyes were burning from the tears, the sadness slowly boiled over to rage and then I started screaming and crying, punching my mattress until I was out of energy where I then just lay there, rubbing the constant flow of tears from my eyes.
“Don’t wanna know, If you’re looking into her eyes,If she’s holdin onto you so tight the way I did before”
“Are you okay sweetheart?”
I looked over at the photographer then back at Dan, going between the two of them. I knew I just needed to do this shoot so I could leave him behind, after all. He told me I needed to move on. I smiled and ever so carefully without smudging my makeup, I wiped the tear that was sitting under my right eye.
“Yeah, I’m okay now”
“Do you want to head back and change into a different outfit, We have all the glamorous shots, now we need something fun and playful.”
“Okay, I’ll go and head back now”
He took off the lens that was on the camera and replaced it with another. I walked over towards Dan and stood directly in front of him. I bent down and picked up a bottle of water I had placed on the ground earlier and took a drink out of it before I went and changed my outfit. When I stood up though, Dan was looking directly at me, and When we stared into each other’s eyes, it was like an electric current was running through my body, but there was also the negativity that rolled over afterwards.
I left him without saying a word, he almost looked disappointed but there wasn’t really much I had to say anyway. I quickly made my way over to Phil who was talking to someone and gave him a hug, His arms wrapped around and embraced me for a short time because I had to be on my way, but he promised we would do coffee when we could. I quickly Jumped into the room and grabbed the black jumpsuit from before. The woman wasn’t there to help me, so I put it on and then searched the closet they had for a pair of bright red heels to match my lips. I walked out with flair and style then walked to the hairstylist. I figured if I was going to be fun, I needed to look the part too.
“Do you think you could possibly tease my hair. I know it’s in curls, but for something playful, I think teasing it could make it look great.”
She stood back and looked at me, she hmm’d and haah’d for a few minutes and then sat me down in the chair. She ran through my hair with the straightener, and then put in tight ringlets, brushing them out afterwards. This was definitely the thing I needed. I gave her a hug and thanked her before telling the photographer I was ready, but as He was about to begin, Dan’s girlfriend stood in the way, directly in front of me.
“That we don’t talk anymore. We don’t talk anymore. We don’t talk anymore, Like we used to do . We don’t laugh anymore. What was all of it for? Oh, we don’t talk anymore, Like we used to do, Like we used to do.”
“Leave him alone”
“Leave my Dan alone.”
I sighed. I didn’t have time for this. I walked her over to the side and stood in front of her, I looked over at Dan who was now glaring at the both of us with such widened eyes. Did he ever tell her about me?
“Look, I’m here to do a job, nothing more”
“Then why does he keep staring at you?”
“I think you need to talk to him about that”
I turned around and started to walk away from her but then all of a sudden I felt her hand grab my wrist. I rolled my eyes and sighed, she was honestly the last person I wanted to be around, next to Dan of course.
“Please tell me”
“I have nothing to tell you, Please let me go”
I quickly paced myself over to the photographer and gave him an apologetic look. I cracked on a smile and got to work, giving him pose after pose. The more I got into it, the more fun I was actually beginning to have, but the next time I glanced over towards Dan and what ever her name was, she didn’t seem to be so happy with him. In fact, their conversation got so heated that everyone in the place could eventually hear them.
“Don’t wanna know, Kinda dress you’re wearing tonight. If he’s giving it to you just right, The way I did before”
“You used to date her?”
He nodded his head whilst trying to keep his voiced hushed, he was trying to quieten her down as well but it definitely wasn’t working. I kept going on with my photo shoot, trying to ignore the argument that was going on in the background but when she said those 5 words, I had to stop and look with the rest of the crowd.
“Well are you over her?”
Dan looked around and noticed the crowd of people just staring at him, me included. On the inside I hoped that he wasn’t completely over me, but I also dreaded it at the same time, because I wouldn’t know how I could handle it if I knew the truth. I decided to look away and get these shots done, after that I could get changed and get out of here. My insides were going crazy and it was making me feel a little sick. I squatted down, looking towards the camera, the photographer thought I was just trying out new poses, but really this was just the best position for me to breathe in.
“Are you alright?”
I looked up and noticed Dan standing on the side of the backdrop giving me what I thought was a concerning look. I took a breathe and stood up, nodding that I was alright. I looked over towards his girlfriend who was now shooting daggers in at me with her eyes, she stomped on over and grabbed Dan’s wrist, pulling him around to face her.
“So are you over her or not Dan?”
“Of course I am, I’m with you”
“I overdosed. Should’ve known your love was a game. Now I can’t get you out of my brain. Oh, it’s such a shame”
It was like I could feel my heart shattering all over again. It was like I was in my home being told that we aren’t together anymore. I couldn’t even look the two of them in the eye anymore, I just needed to get out of here. I turned and walked to the photographer and told him that I was done and needed to leave, and then I ran to the changing room, well as quick as I could in heels anyway.
Phil tried to stop me but I couldn’t bare the thought of him seeing me about to cry, not over something like this anyway. I always told myself that I was moving on from Dan but turns out I wasn’t as moved on as I thought. I ran into the change room with my clothes in hand and closed the door behind me, making sure that it was locked. I couldn’t hold in how I was feeling anymore, I needed to let it all out. I slid down the wall with my clothes scrunched up between my hands. I had to muffle the sounds of my crying, so I brought the clothes towards my face and let everything fall as it may.
Someone was knocking on the door, I knew it was Phil checking that I was okay, but I didn’t have it in me to talk, I just wanted to go home. I took my time in getting up, I reached behind my back where the zipper on the jumpsuit was and pulled it down, I stepped out of it and then put my own clothes back on, it was good to be in the comfort of my own clothes again. I looked at my face in the mirror and fixed up the tear marks that were on my face, then unlocked the door, stepping out of the room.
“That we don’t talk anymore. We don’t talk anymore. We don’t talk anymore, Like we used to do. We don’t laugh anymore. What was all of it for? Oh, we don’t talk anymore, Like we used to do.”
I walked back out into the main room and Dan was standing beside the door. I gave him a quick look and then kept on walking, but he pulled back into his view. What was it with everyone pulling me back today? I didn’t need or want this. I looked at him with my red, swollen eyes and he instantly looked sad, He knew I had been crying, I couldn’t hide it.
I tried to pull out of his grip, but he was both taller and stronger than me, so I couldn’t get out of his grip.
“Dan, please let me go, I need to go”
“But I need to talk to you”
“Why Dan, It’s not like we’ve had anything to say to each other since we’ve broken up. I don’t want to talk to you, you pain me in ways that make it harder to move on from you. I can’t breathe.”
“I shouldn’t have given up”
“But you did Dan, and now you have to live with that, I mean. You’re over me, remember?”
I pulled my wrist from his grip and turned my back towards him. I pulled my bag out and started to dig for my car keys, they must have fallen to the bottom of the bag, because I couldn’t see them anywhere. Past the front doors and back outside, it had gone from day to evening. The sun was in its sunset form, a view I could get used to easily. I used the remaining source of the sun as lighting to search for my keys, clawing through the contents of my bag. I finally found them and pulled them out then walked over towards my car.
“Don’t wanna know. Kinda dress you’re wearing tonight. If he’s holding onto you so tight, The way I did before”
I got into my car and decided to just stop thinking about things until I got home. A hot bath would do me some good. I put the keys into the ignition and turned the radio on, just so I had something to distract me as I drove, because it was going to take me at least an hour to get home. I started to drive away when I noticed someone coming out from the front door, I decided not to really look in case it was Dan because I think I would go into an emotional crisis.
The drive home wasn’t as bad as it could have been, but my phone rang a few times, but you know, because I was busy driving I didn’t answer it. When I pulled up into my driveway I picked up the phone and studied the number, It wasn’t something I recognized. I didn’t like to call people with answers uncommon to me so I just left it and walked into my home. I tossed my keys and phone onto my table and threw my jacket onto the sofa, Today has been an emotional roller coaster that didn’t even need to exist. I walked into the bathroom and started to run a bath then took off all my makeup in the mirror. As beautiful as I looked today, I honestly didn’t recognize who I was, and I don’t think I could live like that on a daily basis.
Make up pad after make up pad, the stuff had finally all come off, I tossed everything into the trash and turned off the taps as my bath was now ready. I was about to strip of my clothes and dip in but I realised that I wouldn’t have a towel when I got out, so I had to go to my linen closet to go and grab one. I picked out one of my fluffy white towels and was about to walk into the bathroom, but I could hear my phone vibrating against the glass table. I left it, there was no one important enough I had to talk to, and I just really needed to relax.
“I overdosed, Should’ve known your love was a game. Now I can’t get you out of my brain. Oh, it’s such a shame, That we don’t talk anymore”
I spent about an hour in that bath, the quiet nature of my apartment was inviting and after everything it was nice to just not think about anything, it was nice to just sit there, in silence. I sighed and closed my eyes, I should probably get out soon, but as it turns out that just wasn’t my decision to make. Someone started banging on my front door, just over and over, it was actually quite rude, considering that my neighbors wouldn’t be too pleased.
I quickly hopped out of the tub and pulled the plug, wrapping my towel around my body. I ran towards the door with caution yelling out that I would be there in a second, after that the banging stopped. Yes I was aware that I was only in a towel, but there wasn’t much else I could really do considering that they were going to bang my door down. I opened up the door but my only reaction when I saw who it was, was to gasp and cling to the towel.
Brown eyes were glaring at me. He was looking down at me. i didn’t say anything but I just looked at him. He paced back and forth, over and over until he stopped, looking back towards me.
“Okay, maybe I’m not over you”
“Dan, you and I have talked over this. You made the decision. You have to live with it. Goodbye Dan”
I went to close the door, but before I knew it, Dan had grabbed me, slinking his arm around my waist, and our lips were together. He pulled back and gave me a soft smile, letting me go.
“Then maybe we just shouldn’t talk about it and go with our feelings”
Huntress Reyna is the best thing that I've heard all day. And Athena Will just trying to help out in the infirmary and blabbing medical facts to everyone in there and telling Nico some regarding makeup or whatever and Nico doesn't know whether to listen to him or shut him up (vIA KISSING) haha someone stop me before I write this
HUNTRESS REYNA ALL THE WAY YO! 8D
Omggggggggg omggggggggg! That’s so good omfg. Will talking to Nico as he applies eyeliner about the facts and use of eyeliner (partly bc hes nervous bc Nico has hella bomb eyeliner game) and Nico is all “yeah Will, I know, I’ve read the ingredients” but he likes hearing Will’s voice so he doesn’t mind.
Here’s the tutorial on how I did my Trellimar makeup! The paint is originally blue-purple-ish. But because of the intense white light from my Nova Ring Light, it made the paint look pale blue ^^` So please don’t send me messages about “why I’m blue when he is supposed to look more purple”. Bc I already know, and I had no idea my light setup would do this… But hope you’ll enjoy the tutorial! And find it useful if you are planning to cosplay this handsome drow yourself! Or any body paint cosplay in general ^-^ And if you have any questions regarding makeup or body paint, just send them my way! <3
Marilyn’s response to photographer Sam Shaw regarding her makeup. She was always aware of what she meant to her fans, and perfectionist about her appearance. Shown here in all her glory at the How to Marry a Millionaire premiere.
Regardless of how Ancient Greek really looked like, their IDEAL of beauty was having white skin (at least when it came for women).
We have a lot of sources (Hesiod, Homer, Ovid, Pindar, etc) where goddesses and other women are described as being beautiful for having white skin. “White-armed” was one of the epiteths to address how beautiful a woman was. If you want one example, in The Odyssey, XVIII, Athena uses her power to make Penelope more beautiful and what we are told is: and she made her taller, too, and statelier to behold, and made her whiter than new-sawn ivory. And when it comes to Persephone, Hesiod Theogony says:
Demeter, and she bare white-armed Persephone.
There are many sources as well, regarding makeup in Ancient Greece and Rome that tell us how women used different products (even lead based products) to whiten their skin. Some men authors even joke and complain about this subject (see Ovid’s Ars Amatoria). Also, women were careful to avoid their skin getting tanned with the sun because, again, white skin was the ideal of beauty.
The fact women had to wear makeup and be careful to avoid getting tanned means that obviously not every ancient greek was “white as ivory”, but as I said again, it was the ideal.
So please, stop disrespecting artists who make depictions of Persephone and other deities having pale or white skin as if it was inaccurate because -according to ancient greek imagery- is not.
Obviously, deities can be portrayed with other skin colors and when it comes for deities related to activities that implied a lot of sunlight exposition it would be natural to depict them with not pale skin. Remember that deities in greek mythology could change their appearance on their wish, so they can look whatever. And in theological terms, gods can’t be limited to a skin color.