red velvet couch

melodrama through the eyes of a (fellow) synaesthete

hello everyone! just like lorde herself, i have a strong case of synaesthesia (I get colour visions, but also tastes and scents as well), so this is my attempt to review the masterpiece that is melodrama through my synaesthetical experiences

let’s go

green light: car air freshener, heated highway and the visions you get when you drive in heat (a la mirages), blackberry-scented cheap shower gel, a pistachio green silk scarf, old school adidas kicks, lemon juice drops on fresh summer salad, beige satin, old black cars (a la classic cadillacs and jaguars), maple syrup, the heat of cairo at around 11 am

sober: ripe honeydew, the smell of guitar wood varnish, red satin ribbons, smudged glass coffee tables, spilled lemonade on said tables, peach vodka, the feel of white plaster in old museums where security guards are very strict, cough syrup (both the colour and the flavour), artificial smell of mint, mint gum, velvet red carpeting in old and badly aired town halls, the humidity of rainforest

homemade dynamite: 4 am sunrise straight after a storm with torn dark grey, nearly black clouds being ripped, smell of gasoline, deep puddles in cracked pavement, dimmed street lights about to go out, magenta, white musk perfume from the body shop, deep indigo of the nearly sunrise of mid may, that walk home from a rowdy night out when everyone is more or less sobered up, but not sober enough to feel shy yet, still drunk enough to be honest with affection and cursing and slightly slurred speech

the louvre: bamboo blinds, bamboo shoots, bonsai trees, flowing honey, varnished birchwood, sunlit old halls in ugly grey soviet buildings, silver hellium-filled balloons, white shiny doors between a party-filled room and a closet where hook-ups and one-night stands take place, old oil paint, the sunny, lemon yellow butterflies, muddly skies of july, edelflower syrup in a glass of white wine, edelflower flower crowns, an expensive pool in a mansion-like house in hollywood hills, the eerie comfort and anxiety of the opening credits of twin peaks

liability: massive bouquets of lily of the valley, white lace curtains knitted by a grandmother, greyness of a sunday in a village on a last warm october day, a single light in an office on a late night in a massive skyscraper, dried flowers, drops of nosebleed on a crystal clean white sink, grey that turns into pastel lilac, the feeling of ripped paper

hard feelings/loveless: faint sunrise shining through the windows of a manhattan apartment in a skyscraper, all shades of orange spilling onto a hi-tec kitchen, cointreau liqueur, sunny warm nights on ocean beach, lukewarm bathtubs when the bath foam has fizzled, bonfires and burned marshmallows, just the beginning of feeling buzzed (like a glass of wine in), tender shades of yellow, rustiness of old heavy doors into a basement, scaffolding sounds, first sunniest days of spring after a heavy winter, sunset in the ocean, heavy fluffy sweaters / neon diner signs, anime eyes, porcelain dolls, peach-flavoured bubblegum, glass bowls

sober ii (melodrama): colour of crimson, heavy red velvet couches, smudged matte red lipstick, glass shards, ripped pearl necklaces and scattered pearls on sticky floor, red limelight, stilettos, tight black bodysuits, smoky-eyed tall models in revealing tight and latex dresses, marble furniture with golden decor, fistfights during a party, ripped suits and thrown ties and unbuttoned white shirts on boys with wealthy fathers

writer in the dark: light parakeet green, whitewashed starched tablecloths that crunch, old wooden tables, rusty cages for canaries, Advocat liqueur, big pearl necklaces on black dresses, big sunglasses (a la Audrey’s in Breakfast at Tiffany’s), sunny Sunday mornings on a patio with a cup of fancy tea, sunday clothes, white churches in greece, silver tears and crying in the backseat after a breakup, wilted flowers in a vase with dirty water

supercut: light green and orange, Love Is bubblegum, peaches, apricots, mint, Mojitos, fairy lights above people at a rooftop party, roadtrip one takes after a breakup with all thier belongings, flavoured water that doesn’t quench thirst, sparkling water with lemon and ice cubes, worn down picnic blankets, fancy dresses girls wear to the entrance into a nightclub, folding chairs, chilled champagne

liability (reprise): cold winter wind of february, the feeling on the tip of the tongue from scolding hot tea, big white rooms in museums, light green, light smoke of e-cigarette that smells like peppermint, the smell of sunscreen, the stillness of a swimming pool at noon in heat

perfect places: red wine, swinging chandeliers, red plastic cups, glass grand pianos, the last summer party in august, that warm feeling at the end of the party where everyone’s buzzed and affectionate and there’s a lot of kissing and hugging and swinging, big fake golden earrings, summer fruits, fancy hotels and luxurious lifts/elevators, skinny dipping, black velvet dresses that touch the floor, uncontrollable laughing in comfy sweaters

Constellations (M)

Summary: He was the president of one of the most notorious fraternities on campus. You had expected him to be the same as his other brothers – a sex-crazed, binge drinking maniac… But the truth ended up surprising you – in more ways than one.

Genre/Warnings: College!AU, Fratboy!Namjoon. It’s pretty much all fluff up until the smut part… Then my trash self happened and added some dirty talking and teasing, along with slightly rough sex. There’s also swearing.

Word Count: 10.7k. (is it too late now to say sorry?)

A/N: IT’S FINALLY DONE!!! I spent the whole fucking day writing this fic and it is now 2:30 A.M and I’m fucking exhausted. I love this fic so much, okay. It literally feels like I put my entire fucking soul into this (although that might just be the sleep talking lol) but I hope you guys like it!!!

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Request: can you write a fredxreader where they’ve been friends for years but won’t admit their feelings. And then when the reader goes to the burrow they finally get together?”


It was Christmas at the castle and I was very excited because I got to go stay with my two best friends in the entire wizarding world. Fred and George Weasley! Hogwarts famous pranksters.

I grab my packed suitcase and skip down the steps from the girls dormitory. When I get down to the common room I see the twins on the couch with their backs to me.

I smirk and be as quiet as possible going up behind them and jolt their shoulders making them jump 3 feet high off the red velvet couch.

I laugh and move in front of them to see their displeased scowls. “Oh come on boys! Put a smile on your face! You get to spend Christmas with yours truly.” I giggle and sit in between them.

Fred huffs and puts his arm around me. “Well…only if George will.” George looks over with a wide teeth grin making us laugh.

I lean into Fred side and sigh. “What’s on your mind (y/n)?” They ask at the same time. I laugh and shake my head. “Even after 5 years of that I’m still not use to it. And I’m just worried.” “Worried?” Fred asks. “About what?” George finishes.

I shrug. “You think your mom will like me?” I ask immediately causing the twins to erupt into a fit of laughter. “I don’t know George. Mums pretty hard to impress isn’t she?” “She sure is Fred. You might even have to bow and kiss her shoes to get her to look you in the eye.” I knock both of them on the head. “I’m being serious you two!” “So are we!” They both say laughing. I roll my eyes and cross my arms frustrated.

Fred POV:

On the train ride (y/n) ended up falling asleep with her head in my lap. I smile and move a few straggly pieces of hair out of her face and then stroke her soft cheek. “You’re hopeless mate.” George laughs.

I look up at him rolling my eyes. “Why not just ask her. You know your secrets going to come out once she meets mum.” I huff and look down at (y/n) again. “If I tell her it’s gonna ruin 5 years of friendship.” “Or make it worthwhile. The worst she can say is no.” I shrug my shoulders and continue to play with her hair.

(Y/n) POV:

I’m awaken by a slight poking to my cheek. I open my eyes to see Fred Weasley. The sun hitting behind him making his body look like an angel sent from above to protect and love me…

Okay. I’ll admit it. I am hopelessly in love with Fred. Ever since first year when he insisted I help him prank his brother Percy.

“Good afternoon sleepyhead. Bout time you woke up.” “We thought we’d have to pour water on you!” “Oh shut up George!” I laugh and throw an empty cup at him.

We get off the train and I see a plump woman hugging Ron, Harry, and Ginny. We then come closer and she sees me.

I gulp and look at Fred and George. They laugh and playfully bow and pretend to kiss her feet. I roll my eyes and introduce myself.

"Hello. My name is-” “Oh (y/n) dear! I’ve heard so much over the years! It’s so nice to finally meet you!” She says joyfully and pulls me into a hug. I turn around and see the twins giving me thumbs up.

Fred POV:

As we come closer to home I get nervous. One of the main reasons I’ve never agreed to (y/n) coming over is in embarrassment of the burrow. Not that I don’t love it or my family, but all I want to do is impress her.

Mum pulls up to the house and I turn to (y/n) seeing her with a smile on her face as she sees my home.

We get inside and (y/n) looks around at the small crowded rooms. “It’s not much, but it’s home.” I say behind her. “I love it.” She smiles at me making me sigh in relief.

Mum looks at me and smiles as she catches me looking at (y/n). “So (y/n) give me a little spin!” Oh mum no please. (Y/n) furrows her brows, but spins 360 regardless. “Well Fred it looks like you’ve got yourself a all around wonderful girl! She’s lovely!” Mum says hugging (y/n) again.

I shake my head fast as it becomes as red as my hair. “No. Mum. She’s not-” “Oh hush Freddie! No need to be embarrassed of your girlfriend!” Oh no that’s it. My life is over.

(Y/n) looks at me wide eyed. “I’m sorry what?” George then swoops in and drags her away to save me from the conversation I was exactly trying to avoid.

Once they’re up the staircase I groan and slump in a chair. “Mum. Why would you say that?” “Well the way you talk about her I assumed!” “No mum.” I put my head in my hands. “You’re telling me you haven’t told her?! Fredric Weasley what have I told you? You need to tell her before someone else tells her and she’s out of your reach! Now you climb those steps and tell her how you feel!” Mum cries loudly and forces me up the stairs.

(Y/n) POV:

After George basically trapped me in the room he shares with Fred we listen intensely to the conversation between his mother and his twin brother. “Now you climb those steps and tell her how you feel!”

How he feels? Seconds later the door opens and a red faces Fred walks in. “I’ll give you two some time.” George says with a smile and walks out locking the door from the other side.

Fred sits on his bed and puts his head in his hands. I sit next to him on the bed and pull his hands away. “Should I go first?” I ask my face heating up already.

Fred looks at me confused. “Remember in first year when you came up to me and asked me to help you prank Percy? You and George came up to me in the common room and told me I needed some fun. When we snuck a stink bomb in 3 different books and then ran I knew I liked you. You gave me fun and friendship when I didn’t really have any. I just never told you because of our friendship. I didn’t want to ruin 5 years.” I say with my face heating up by the second.

Fred lifts my chin up and then smiles. “First year. Once I saw you pass my compartment on the train I liked you. When you were sorted I liked you even more. Then when I finally asked you to prank and I knew I loved you.” “I love you too Fred Weasley.”

Fred smiles and leans in pressing his lips to mine. The door opens and George pops his head inside. “Finally! I’ve been waiting for 5 years!” “Oh shove off!” Fred says and kisses me again.

Originally posted by jesimahcah

Hogwarts Common Room Aesthetics

The Slytherin Common Room. The echoing of footsteps against the cold stone floors. A huge room, crowded with objects and people, that still felt empty. Green light filtering in through the windows and causing shadows to dance around the room. The soft swishing noise of the black lake outside the windows. A cold room but a large fireplace at the centre, offering warmth and relaxation after a hard day of work. Tall, wing-backed leather chairs and handmade pillows with glittering embroidery. Intricate stone carvings decorating the high ceilings, many of snakes and statues. Old portraits of wise wizards with pointed hats and long, twisting beards hung up on the wall. Emerald green, grey and silver carpet stretching the length of the room. Round, polished wooden tables with spare parchment, inkwells and spell books piled on top. Cabinets in the corner filled with books and magical artefacts. The feeling of camaraderie in the room without even saying a word.

The Hufflepuff Common Room. The sound of high-pitched laughter filling the air along with the sweet smells of homemade cooking. Bowls and jars and boxes filled with delicious sweets and chocolate to snack on. A mini-bar like counter in the corner where one can get an endless supply of pumpkin juice. A crackling log fire surrounded by colourful cushions, couches, footstools and chairs that you sink into whenever you sit down. A cosy, round room that felt like home the minute you walked into it. Brightly-lit with rays of yellow sunshine streaming in through circular windows. Pot plants lining the wall and flowers hanging down in baskets. Small and worn but sturdy wooden tables dotted around the room, comfortable chairs tucked neatly around them. The buzz of social interaction and happiness. Small bookshelves filled with books about cooking, herbology and childhood tales that one would often reminisce about. Multiple rooms, all running off of one another, that are always filled with chatter and warmth.

The Ravenclaw Common Room. The buzz of satisfaction when you answer the door knocker’s riddle on the first try, and standing around and arguing with it when your answer is wrong. “What do you mean a raven and a writing desk aren’t similar just because they both have an ‘r’?” A high-roofed tower decorated to look like space, in which the tiny painted stars actually twinkled. White walls, columns, arches and exquisite architecture. Crowding around tiny, marble tables with rustic lamps for late night study sessions. Huge, wall-high pristine glass windows that let in white light. Equally high bookshelves crammed with all manner of books - books that are old, tattered and written in foreign languages, hardcover books where the paper glistens and comic books about superheroes brought in by muggleborns. The sound of scratching quills and quiet, excited whispers drifting around the room. Cobalt blue victorian styled chaise lounges with hampton style cushions. Inkwells, parchment and books scattered across the room - on the floor, on tables, on couches. The feeling of acceptance.

The Gryffindor Common Room. A roaring fire encased by a stone hearth, with a house crest carved into the masonry. Low, old, velvet red couches and chairs facing the fire, lighting up faces in a warm orange glow. Small seats but big groups, crowding together, sitting on people’s laps. Traditional red, gold, black and blue decorated drapes hanging down every wall - some detailing artworks of lions, some of wizards and some of horses. Tiny wooden tables with tattered books, brass objects and oil lamps covering their surface. Ebony brown chairs with red cushions half-tucked under the tables. Large, fire-brick coloured chairs facing one another, encouraging conversation. Green, red and gold pillows dotted around the room. Big, faded carpets worn out from being walked over for decades. Chessboards set up around the room, scarves and blankets tossed carelessly onto chairs, decks of cards sprawled over coffee tables. Gold-framed paintings of wizards and witches hanging from creaking wooden rafters. Checkered stone walls and tall, medieval-type stained glass windows. The feeling of safety, comfort and fellowship.

Patater photoshoot (nsfw)

(OKAy so this was meant to literally be me just writing down the prompt. But then I ended up writing a whole oneshot… anyways enjoy with a bad quality bit of smut at the end….)

Kent Parson comes out as the first “official" gay player in NHL history. Three weeks later, Alexei Mashkov announces he is bisexual. Reactions from the public are mixed between disgust and acceptance.

The two follow each other on social media, but other than that and a few interactions on the ice, they don’t know each other. After a month or so of them both being out of the closet, they are approached by a very well known magazine. The magazine plans to do an edition about NHL hockey players and want to do an entire five pages of Kent and Alexei. Together. Naked. In extremely suggestive positions.

Something about ”encouraging the public to accept people of different sexualities" is all Kent really knows. He doesn’t care. Mashkov may have agreed to it because spreading awareness is important to him, but Kent is only agreeing for one reason. Publicity. The fact that Mashkov is incredibly sexy and Kent has had a crush on him for months has nothing to do with it. Nothing at all.

So Kent shows up to the photoshoot. He’s whisked away immediately by stylists who wax almost all of his body hair. Makeup is applied all over his body to cover up blemishes and imperfections. Then his eyebrows are groomed and filled, his hair is styled and he’s been changed into a pair of tight, short, black under armour boxers.

Once he’s finally done being made beautiful, he’s lead to the first room they will be shooting in. Mashkov is already there. The lucky bastard hasn’t been waxed, Kent notices immediately. The second thing he notices is how fucking huge the man is. Yeah, he’s seen him on the ice before, but cmon, everyone looks big in hockey gear.

Wow, those back muscles are amazing. And shoulders and legs and okay literally every muscle on Mashkov’s body is toned to perfection.

Eventually Mashkov turns around and notices Kent standing in the room. Kent’s eyes immediately wander south, seeing he’s wearing similar under armour boxers, only his are dark grey and about two inches longer. They really don’t leave much to the imagination and Kent has to force himself to look away from Mashkov’s bulge.

He looks back up and meets Mashkov’s eyes, blushing lightly as he sees the man’s slight smirk. Great, he was caught checking him out.
“Um, I’m Kent Parson, from the Las Vegas Aces…“ he introduces himself quietly, sticking out his hand. The other hockey player smiles and shakes his hand gently. “Hello, little captain. I’m Alexei Mashkov. You call me Alexei,” he replies, and holy shit that Russian accent is hot.
“So I guess we’ll be shooting together today?“ Kent tries to make small talk. “Yes, I’m very excite,” Alexei says enthusiastically. Kent is about to reply when a woman and a man who Kent assumes are from the magazine approach them.

”I see you’re all warmed up to each other, huh? Great, well if you are both ready we are going to start now,“ the woman says. She’s very tall and gives off the impression that she’s a hard worker. Kent likes her already. “I’m Kara, with my co-marketing manager, Brian. We will be here to instruct you through out the session. If either of you have any questions or are uncomfortable with the poses don’t hesitate to say anything. Alright?” Before Kent or Alexei can reply, Brian is gently pushing them off in the direction of the set.

The set is simple, three white walls and a white floor to match. Kara tells them to stand in the centre of the room.
“Good! Now Kent, dear, angle yourself directly at the camera, and look down at the piece of masking tape- yes there, perfect.“ Kent feels more than awkward, standing there while the photographers, assistants and other workers watch intently.

“Okay, now Alexei, stand behind him with your hands on his waist.” Kent hears movement and then a pair of large hands grip his hips. The touch causes his face to redden and he ignores the tingly feeling he gets up his spine.
“A bit low there, Alexei, but I like your enthusiasm,“ Kara says, glancing between the two men and a clipboard. Alexei coughs awkwardly behind him and slides his hands up a few inches, wrapping them around Kent’s waist. “Wow you have small waist,” the Russian murmurs behind him. Usually Kent takes pride in his feminine features, but now he’s just struggling to keep the pink out of his cheeks.

“Okay, now move closer together.“ Alexei moves forwards a step and Kent feels his presence, along with warm breath on his hair. “Closer, please. As in touching. And wrap your arms around his waist, it will feel more natural.”

Alexei has to bend slightly so his arms fasten around Kent’s waist. Soon he feel’s the large man’s crotch pressing against his behind, along with his toned upper body against Kent’s back and shoulders. The run of Alexei’s skin against his own is insanely satisfying. Kent couldn’t stop his blushing if he tried.

“Perfect! Now Kent, focus on the ground and try to look shy… yes, that’s good. Alexei, stare right into the camera. Looking dominant and confident… yes, just like that, FREEZE!“ As Kent stares at the ground, looking shy, the camera goes off and he can’t help the feeling he’s getting from being pressed against the other hockey player.

They do more poses that aren’t so bad, like just simple hugging and hand holding. Alexei and Kent begin getting more comfortable and stop looking so guarded in the pictures. Brian claims they want to try everything. Kent isn’t sure if he can make it through everything without getting a boner.

They are lead into the next room with an actual set. It’s made to look like a fancy living room, with a large velvet red couch in the middle. Mashkov offers him a sweet smile of reassurance which makes Kent’s heart skip a beat.

“Alexei, lying on the couch please, with your feet on this end and head at this end.” The hockey player follows instructions, laying across the velvet piece of furniture. Kent struggles to keep his mind out of the gutter as he watches the attractive man get into position.
“Kent, honey, go sit on him, with your legs on either side of him.“ Kent rolls his eyes at Kara, “You can just say straddle him, you know. You don’t need to give me fancy instructions,” he says. This earns a few laughs from the lady.

Kent takes a deep breath and moves towards Alexei, who’s watching him intently with deep brown eyes. C'mon, Kent has done this multiple times in real situations, why can’t he just fake it this time?
“Uh, you’re okay with this?“ Kent whispers to Alexei, waiting for the small smile and nod that follows. Kent smiles back, before climbing onto the large man, straddling his hips. Kent settles over Alexei’s crotch, his cheeks turning bright red as Alexei let’s out a soft huff of air before biting his lip. Kent’s entire body is on fire. “You very pretty,” Alexei whispers softly. “Sorry I’m not control body well,“ he adds, his face growing red to match Kent’s. Kent feels butterflies in his stomach. “Thank you, it’s okay, me too,” he says quietly. Alexei’s smile makes his heart flutter and they don’t break eye contact, even when they hear the camera going off.

“This is going well boys, you two have a lot of chemistry,“ Kara says. Kent breaks his gaze away from Alexei’s adoring one, accidentally shifting slightly over the man’s growing bulge. Alexei lets out another soft huff of air, that sounded oddly similar to a quiet moan. He looks back at the man and smiles sheepishly, but sees him with his eyes shut as if he’s concentrating really hard on something. Speaking of hard…

The camera goes off again as Kent watches Alexei. Kent doesn’t think he’s ever met a more gorgeous man.

“Kent, grab Alexei’s arms and hold them above his head on the couch arm.” Kent’s face manages to grow even redder as Alexei offers him his wrists. He leans forwards so he can reach, causing him to rub against Alexei again, and this time it’s him who lets out a loud, embarrassing moan. Alexei’s eyes look oddly hopeful as he looks down at the man bashfully. This should be much more awkward than it is.

“Maybe we should take a short break, try this again in fifteen?“ Kara suggests, and Kent gives her a playful glare as she giggles to herself. Kent feels Alexei’s hands on his waist as the man sits up, then he lifts Kent off of him and places him on his feet as if he weighs nothing. Seriously? Is everything about this man sexy? How can he just pick Kent up like that?

“I’m go water,” Alexei mumbles, scratching the back of his neck and offering Kent a small smile before he heads out of the room. Kara smirks at Kent as he stands there, watching the larger hockey player leave.
“Oh, be quiet you,“ he says, blushing for the hundredth time. “I haven’t even said anything yet!” She giggles. “But look, if you think he’s attractive you should go for it.“ Kent isn’t sure why he’s taking advice from an almost stranger. He shrugs and sits back down on the couch. “I don’t think he’s interested,” he says sadly. “I wish he was though. I’ve been crushing on him since he was drafted in 2010. I was 17 at the time and I may or may not have had his poster in my bedroom.“ Kara laughs loudly at this, and places her clipboard down on the prob table nearby.
“That’s a hilarious story. But listen honey, he’s definitely into you. The whole time we were waiting for you to arrive, he was asking all the assistants if he looked okay for you,” she tells him. Kent’s heart flutters with hope. “And they were all like, ‘he’s a gay man and you are wearing tiny boxers, I’m sure he’ll think you look good…’“ Kent laughs, just as Alexei walks back into the room, wearing a different pair of boxers.
“Brian tell me put these on,” he says, and then yawns, touching his hands to his neck as his upper body stretches. Kent’s eyes may or may not watch as the man’s skin strains against his muscles.

“Are you both ready to start again?“ Kara asks. Alexei sits on the couch beside Kent, reaching an arm onto his shoulders. “I’m ready. You okay? Looking cold,” Alexei says, as an explanation for putting his arm around the small captain. Kent blushes and nods. Kara giggles to herself again.
“Okay sorry, but I totally ship you guys. Anyways, maybe you guys can come up with some of your own poses. The pictures so far have turned out better when you didn’t know we were taking them…“ Alexei nods beside him, his hand gently rubbing circles into Kent’s shoulder. He’s flirting, right?
“Maybe I have idea,” he says, standing and pulling Kent to his feet. “I’m pick you up?“ He asks with a raised eyebrow. Kent nods and Alexei smiles wide at him before wrapping his large hands around his thoughts and pulling him up. Kent goes willingly, wrapping his legs around Alexei’s waist.
“You have a nice smile,” he says quietly. He feels Alexei’s hand gently squeeze his leg. “You have nice everything,“ he says back. Kent is sure he is blushing as Alexei holds his gaze. The camera goes off a few times, making Kent remember where he is.

“Maybe Alexei can hold Kent against the wall? It will make the pose seem more… provocative…”

Next thing Kent knows is he’s being held up against the wall, with Mashkov’s hips holding him in place. Kent’s hard. He couldn’t stop it from happening, okay?! Alexei is really attractive and the idea of him
fucking Kent against the wall is really hot.

Kent has his arms around Alexei’s neck, head tilted back against the wall, his eyes shut and his mouth hung open as if he were letting out a loud moan. Alexei has his face buried in Kent’s neck as he holds the small man up. The shot is from the waist up, making it really look like Kent is being fucked by the other hockey player.
“I’m get many chirps for this…“ Alexei mumbles.

After that the two are a lot more comfortable with each other, as far as the sexual poses go. They do a lot more. Kent’s favourite was when he was bent over the couch, with Mashkov standing pressed against him like they were fucking again. Alexei has a boner through out most of it, and Kent bites his lip every time he feels it press against his bum.

“So, this magazine is like lowkey a big porno?” Kent inquires, as he gets into another slightly awkward position with Mashkov.
“I’m not minding. I’m get talk to and touch boy with beautiful body,“ Alexei says, then mumbles something to himself in Russian. Kent flushes, his stomach dipping.
“You think I’m beautiful?” He asks, as his arms wind around Alexei’s neck for the pose. Alexei’s hands grip his ass. “I’m thinking so. I’m also think you like me,“ he whispers, smirking down at Kent. “Hey, don’t get all cocky just cause your hands are on my ass.” The camera goes off. “It’s very nice,“ Alexei says with a shrug, moving his hands up to rest on the small of his back instead. “Well thanks,” Kent is definitely not blushing again.

The next pose is quite simple, just a hug from behind. Alexei decides to be bold and press his lips to the soft skin in the crook of Kent’s neck. Kent shivers, and then Alexei starts sucking a hickey into his skin. Kent’s knees go weak and he moans loudly, cursing to himself when the camera goes off to capture the moment.
“I’m not sure they’re acting…“ Kara mumbles to one of the assistants. Alexei asks for another break. Everyone leaves the room, closing the door behind them and as soon as they’re alone, Alexei resumes kissing his neck.

Kent moans quietly and tilts his head back against Alexei’s chest. The taller man trailed a hand down Kent’s chest and stomach, before dipping into Kent’s boxers. Kent bites his lip as Alexei takes hold of his cock, slowly pumping as he sucks on his neck. Kent is a moaning mess. “Cum,” Alexei whispers in his ear huskily. Kent is about to make a comment about how he can last longer than five seconds, when Alexei nips at his ear and whispers again, “Cum for me princess.“ It’s the rough, Russian accent that has
Kent releasing in his boxers as Alexei strokes him. “F-fuck Alexei…” he mumbles, moving away from the larger man. He blushes as he turns to look at him.
“That was so hot. I’ve literally never finished so quickly…“ he says sheepishly. His body is tingling as Alexei smiles lazily at him. “I’m make you cum again later if you are wanting. I’m make you whenever you are wanting,” he says, wrapping his long arms around Kent’s waist. Kent smiles, before leaning up to kiss the man softly. “I’m definitely wanting.“

Bare Your Teeth and Dig Your Grave

What is this? I have no idea. Character study? Inferences? Headcanons? Who knows my friends.

Any way time to thank @liketolaugh-dgm and her friends @nea-writes @lpwrites @allxnwalkxr for giving me points on characterization in an ask because they’re way better than meeeee

Summary: The General has a lot of information that no one knows. The most important piece, he thinks, is the fact that Allen Walker has always been a pretty creepy child.

Part 1/??? will maybe be a stand alone if people think it sucks??

Characters: Cross, Allen Walker, Lvellie, mentions of Link

Warnings: Cussing, slight mental breakdowns, very very vague illusions (?) to blood and very nasty eating habits

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MidoTaka MiniFic - Well Hung

Title: Well Hung
Characters/Pairing: Midorima/Takao mentions of KagaKuro and MuraHimu
Rating: T for innuendo
Summary: Given enough rope, Shintarō will use it.      
Words: 687 (Read here or on AO3).

Well Hung

“Are you serious?” Takao cackled loudly as he let his head fall back against the red velvet couch. “How big are we talking about?”

“Can’t even stand up on its own,” Kuroko said solemnly. “Too heavy,” he explained.  

Takao’s eyes bulged as his jaw dropped. “Seriously?” he asked, sounding thoroughly impressed.

Kuroko nodded vigorous and Takao gasped audibly.

“I can show you a picture, if you’d like,” Kuroko offered.

“Alright,” Takao agreed as he eagerly scooted closer to Kuroko to have a look at Kuroko’s phone.

“Himuro-kun sent it to Kagami-kun who sent it to me,” Kuroko explained. “See,” he said. “It’s just sitting there between his legs.”

“No way!” Takao exclaimed. “It’s enormous!”

“It is indeed,” Kuroko agreed. “Himuro-kun nearly cried when he saw it. He told Kagami-kun he’s not sure he can handle it. He wants to give it a good home, but he doesn’t know what he’s gonna do with it or where he’s gonna stick it.”  

Shintarō slammed his lucky pencil down rather loudly. He had had enough of this crude conversation. He got up from his perch at the dining room table where he’d been trying to study – trying being the operative word.

He was in med school, so naturally he had a lot of school work and Takao, by comparison, had a lot of down time. They shared an apartment and so Shintarō tried not to mind so much when Takao had friends over but this, this was beyond the pail.

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anonymous asked:

Are you a photographer? What sort of set up would you have for louis? Nude photography?

no i’m not a photographer! but i do love to imagine concepts for photo shoots of louis.

some of my fav settings are:
•laundromat at night, with hanging plants and neon lights illuminating him
•a nature setting, either in a forest or a field, maybe a small lake. taken at misty morning or bright, hot evening
•an old fashioned living room with a fireplace, large red velvet couch, and white fur rug, louis smoking, and a glass of champagne on the floor
•headshots of louis with minimal makeup, but lots of highlighter. coloured lights shimmering off of his face and emphasizing his golden skin

i have a side blog for louis aesthetics if you’re interested! @louisconcept
Christmas Enemy // c.h

Originally posted by bestpicsof5sos

credit to the original owner of this gif

Requested: yes

Pairing: Y/N x Calum

Series: Paid to be Popular - The Purpose of Love - Bittersweet Generation

Description: Calum and Y/N hate each other, but have to deal with the pain since the annual Christmas Party is coming near. Unfortunately, the party doesn’t turn out as they thought when they both get locked inside - alone.

The snow hit your nose as you hurried inside. Michael was greeting you with a wide smile and cup of hot chocolate. It had been a tradition that the boys would gather their beloved friends to London and have some sort of crazy party usually involving getting drunk, stoned, high, whatever they could find and probably making some terrible Christmas decorations, always throwing them out the next day.

“Cal isn’t here yet,” Michael said as you threw your black boots covered in white snow in the corner and gave him your scarf and jacket before entering the house. Every year it was a new celebration, new house, new people. Expect for you. You had been invited to these parties since the very beginning.

You walked from the small entrance to a giant living room. It was such a cosy house with only one floor. Luke was sitting down by the fireplace with his girlfriend and Ashton was pouring up some sort of eggnog to himself, probably for the third time. Luke and his girl were leaning up against a red velvet couch, not sitting on it like normal people would do. Beside the couch stood a table on a pretty carpet and the wooden walls were filled with creepy, but nice paintings. You were pretty early, but as soon as you saw at least five other people walking around the room, you sighed for not being one of the firsts -  but still being before that asshole of a bassist. 

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Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader Insert 

Genre: angsty 

Summary: matt can’t seem to shake off something that happened to you, that he believes was his fault. 

Words: 1,251

His calloused and bruised hand was resting gently on your waist, while his other hand held yours up in the air. His glasses were off, per your request, so his eyes rested on your chin. His face wasn’t shaved smooth, but it wasn’t beardy either; just the perfect amount of stubble.

The jazz band had started to play a soft tune, and that was when Matt asked you to dance.  You were surprised he agreed to going to Tony’s gala, given the physical state he was in, so it was a shocker that he wanted to move at all. Your first response was to ask if he was sure, and he replied with, “I don’t want to keep taking away these moments from you.”

“We talked about this, Matt,” you replied quietly, “you’re not ruining this relationship.”

“Just please,” he said, “I want to make this right.”

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Protective—Neymar Imagine

anonymous said: Can u do one were me and Neymar are dating and I’m pregnant and me and Rafa and Davi are out shopping and we get mobbed by the paps trying to get a pic of my stomach and I get afraid and when we go home Neymar finds out and get angry and gets very protective for the rest of my pregnancy please.

thanks for the details, it made this easier to write!
I wrote this today, so it’s posted earlier than expected.


“Okay I’m just gonna steal your girls for the afternoon, we need some girl time and Y/N probably vomits from time to time looking at your face,” Rafa teased; referring to both me and my belly. Neymar threw a pillow at her; which missed by a long shot. 

I laughed, “We’ll be back soon, Ney.”

“Whatever you say meu amor, but going shopping with Rafa is a death wish,” Neymar shot a glare at Rafa’s direction as she threw the pillow back at him. Davi ran down the stairs quickly all of a sudden and grabbed my hand.

"Y/N! I want to come too.” He squealed. I nodded and picked him up, kissing him lightly on the cheek. “Of course, baby.” I smiled kindly towards him and he nuzzled into the crook of my neck. Neymar heaved a long sigh and plopped down onto the couch.

“First my girlfriend and soon to-be daughter, now you’re taking my son. Who’s next? Poker?” Neymar snapped jokingly at Rafa. She shook her head disapprovingly and ruffled his hair before skipping down the stairs.

“See you!” I waved, starting down the stairs with Davi in my arms. Him, squeezing my bloated tummy. Neymar rushed over to me and kissed my head.

“Not even a goodbye kiss,” Neymar shook his head.

I giggled, “You just gave me one.”

“That doesn’t count, I had to run like three meters to catch you,” Neymar joked and pretended to pant and rubbed his back hand across his forehead; acting to sweat. I rolled my eyes and smiled sweetly.

"Sorry I don’t kiss sweaty guys, that’s nasty,” I laughed and lightly pushed him back; giving me enough time for me and Davi to rush downstairs (as quickly as I could) and walk out the door, slamming it behind us. 

Rafaella honked the horn of her Range Rover as me and Davi walked towards the car. She revved up the engine and slid her seat belt on as I helped Davi into his car seat, buckling him in safely and shutting the door. I slid into the passenger seat and buckled my seat belt and Rafa turned to me before driving.

“I thought you and Neymar were doing something dirty, considering how long you took to get out here,” She eyed me and my cheeks flushed.

“You know me better than that,” I joked.

Rafa shrugged, “Do I?” I playfully nudged her as the Range Rover sped off.

Rafa had been holding two bags on each forearm plus her purse, which weighed as much as an anvil. I was surprised that her arms weren’t falling off. Davi was dragging his feet across the white floor of the mall as Rafa entered another store.

“Oi, Rafa are we going to leave soon?” I called after her. We walked into a vintage clothing store and Rafa was already pulling shirts and dresses off the racks. Davi started whining, “Y/N I wanna leave…”

“I know I know, we’ll only be a few more minutes, I promise,” I assured him, then picked him up along with my two bags. I hadn’t bought too much. Just a summer dress and a few tops, but Rafa was going all out with her credit card.

“Yeah, well Neymar told me specifically to get you a beautiful dress because he’s taking you out soon so…” Rafa trailed off, and she grabbed my hand leading Davi and I out of the store.

“Are you sure?” I asked.

Rafaella laughed aloud, “Well actually no, I just want you to buy something beautiful, not that your other clothes aren’t incredibly stylish and chic.”

“Please never use the word chic.”

“Alright let’s just go buy you a fancy dress,” Rafa dragged me into an elegant store with several dresses and fancy furniture. The walls were painted pale pink and there was gold and white wall paper all over the store. I raised my eyebrows and eyed Rafaella.

“Is this too fancy?” I asked concernedly and Rafa shook her head and ran off; checking prices on the dresses and pulling them off the racks. I laughed at her and set a now sleeping Davi on one of the red velvet couches and took off for Rafa, though I didn’t know if any dresses would fit me considering I was pregnant. I checked my watch worrying if Neymar would wonder if we were never coming home, it read 10:00.

“Alright, Rafa c’mon it’s getting really late,” I encouraged and she threw me (quite literally) a violet dress and a sparkly silver cross body sleeve and a trail of sparkles that led down to the end of the dress. She handed me a jade colored strapless dress with several jewels at the waist. 

“Don’t worry, you’ll be able to fit into the these when my niece pops into the world,” Rafaella teased.

We then bought the dresses and Rafa bought a silver and gold one and soon Davi took Rafa’s hand and we were out of that store. I checked my phone and found that I got several notifications; Rafa had posted a picture of me and Davi caught off guard. I smirked and double tapped, when my eyes wandered around my screen, uh oh

“Rafa did you accidentally geo tag us?” I eyed her and she checked her phone and her expression hardened.

“Merda,” Rafa cursed, “Oi, I’m sorry. Let’s get to the car." 

We walked quickly down the escalators and through the mall rapidly so that we could maybe beat the paparazzis that would soon be at the mall. They were extremely crazy with Neymar, and crazy with me and Rafa too. Right on cue, Rafa swung the glass doors open and the blinding flashes were only what I saw as we exited. The clicks and yells: “Y/N OVER HERE!”


I grew nervous and Rafaella and Davi were nowhere to be seen, I silently cursed and the paparazzi grew closer to me and someone suddenly appeared out of nowhere and the camera blinded my vision and someone harshly shoved me as I fell on my side. Pain shot through my body, making me worried about my baby. Rafa suddenly came to my side with Davi and helped me up.

“You monsters! Back up, she’s pregnant!” Rafa yelled.

After a few minutes of shoving, we pushed ourselves out of the mob and eventually we jumped into Rafa’s Range Rover. She swiftly steered us away from them and onto the highway. Rafa rubbed my arm softly and that’s when the tears finally fell and we drove home quickly.


I slammed the car door behind me and rubbed my eyes hastily so that my tears wouldn’t be visible. I unlocked the door and was greeted with a fuming Neymar. He had the television remote and his iPhone 6 in his hands and raised his eyebrows at me.

Meu amor, what’s up?” I faked a smile. 

His expression hardened, “Why did I have to find out from some news reporter that you fell hard on your side!” He shouted. “Are you okay? Is our baby girl okay?”

He walked up the stairs, with me on his heels and he flopped onto the couch. He tiredly gave me a look and exasperatedly rolled his eyes at the television. He made his way over to me and held his hands around my bloated stomach. That’s when he started crying. He had never shown his weak side, he was always expected to be the strong one.

“She’s fine, we’re fine,” I assured him and he looked up at me with his puffy eyes and gave me a half-hearted smile. I smiled back and then kissed him; our lips moving in perfect synchronization. His tears felt moist against my lips and his lips tasted salty. We broke away and he caressed my cheek.

“I’m sorry I yelled, it’s just that she’s so special and I don’t want anything to happen to her,” Neymar explained. “She’s my princesa, you’re minha rainha. I love you both so much.”

“Cuddle me too!” A voice cried, and Davi soon came rushing in with Rafa. Neymar playfully roared and tickled Davi as he burst into a fit of giggles. Neymar kissed my tummy and my lips once again and smiled lovingly.

“Sorry, it’s just I get really protective over minha familia,” Neymar apologized. “I think I broke a vase thinking about someone hurting you.”

We all burst out laughing.

“If you ask me, it’s kinda hot when you’re protective,” I teased, as I stood up and Neymar stood up as well.

“That’s it, come here you!” Neymar laughed as I ran upstairs, with him on my heels and the giggles of Davi and Rafa filled the room.

I love this family. My family now.

hope you like this anon, I kinda switched it so the girl fell, so Neymar had a reason to be extra protective. I kinda wrote this just when I came back from school, okay I should shut up now. Thanks for the request it was fun to write!

  • Professor: You can animate anything.
  • Me: Can I animate Lou Reed sticking a needle in his arm while Candy Darling is trying to fix Gerard Malanga's hair, who's trying to set up a camera to film Edie Sedgwick, who's freaking out over missing a set of false lashes she stole from Macy's while Brigid Berlin is trying to make a satanic wheel of pills, while Andy Warhol is silently sitting on his velvet red couch that's been molested by the roaming strangers that he lets into his Factory?
  • Professor:
Gangsta. Joker x Reader

A/n: took me a while to think of this one and now it’s my best work yet . Ant this one is the longest yet too xd

Warning : swearing, slight smut

Pairing : (Jared Leto ) Joker x Reader

Plot : the reader is a singer at J’s club and the reader is his favorite girl . When he heard her sing the song “gangsta” he called her in to his VIP room for a “talk”


You worked at the club for a while now . The job was quite enjoyable to your surprise and it paid well so you didn’t complain . The guys who worked there along side you were nice too . Even though you worked for the most dangerous man in Gotham you didn’t fear him .

Yeah . The Joker. Clown Prince of crime.

You actually felt safe with him . In a weird way you were attracted to him . God even thinking that made you question your sanity. 

The guy was a murderous psychopath. But some how , he made you get interested . He lived such a dangerous yet free life . You often wondered how does it feel . To not have a care in the world.  Do what you want.  Whenever you want.  You loved the idea . And it always made you shiver . You wanted it so bad.  You wanted to be free like him . Some times you wanted to be just as insane as him .

Wait ?! What were you thinking!?

You shook your head and entered the club . As you walked in , the bartender,  Joe , your good friend , smiled at you , welcoming you to the club as you walked to him .

“Hey Joe , what’s up ” you asked trying to say it loud enough for him to hear you . Usually you made small talk with him before you go on stage . You manly did it to know if the Boss was here . You somehow sing and dance better knowing he’s not watching.  Him watching you made you nervous.  What if you made a mistake?  But it looks like he’s not here .
“Nothing much oh by the way (Y/n) we have the crowd wanting you to sing “that” song so go on and show them what you got “ he smirked.

Oh yeah . That song.  Gangsta.  That song always made you want to sing it as loud as you can . It was perfectly describing your feelings to the Clown Prince of crime.  You smirked before going backstage to get ready. 

You decided if the crowd wanted a show you would give it to them . You got in you tightest black and purple dress , it hug your curves in all the right places and showed of a good amount of skin too . Your make up a bit more dramatic.  A big black smokey eye paired with a bright red lip.  You kinda looked like him . You slightly smiled. 

He was driving you insane , so why not let out all your feelings in the song ? He wasn’t here anyway so why not ?

You got on your black and gold high heals and walked to to the stage . As soon as your heels hit the stages glass like floor almost all eyes were on you . You slightly giggled as the song started to play .

 I need a gangsta
To love me better
Than all the others do
To always forgive me
Ride or die with me
That’s just what gangsters do

You sang , dancing along to the songs beat . Your moves were graceful and even sexy . Especially the way you moved your hips when you walked around stage .

I’m fucked up, I’m black and blue
I’m built for it, all the abuse
I got secrets, that nobody, nobody knows
I’m good on, that pussy shit
I don’t want, what I can get
 I want someone, with secrets
That nobody, nobody, nobody knows

Your eye ran all over the crowd.  Men staring at you like a pice of raw meat.  It only made you make your moves a bit more sexier . You used your hand to push a strand of hair away from your face , bitting your bottom lip slightly in the process. 

 I need a gangsta
To love me better
Than all the others do
To always forgive me
Ride or die with me
That’s just what gangsters do

Only about half way through the song you saw . He was here . The Joker was watching your little show from the VIP room.  Your heart sank . You slightly bit your lower lip again . But you surprisingly didn’t stop .

 My freakness is on the loose
And running, all over you
Please take me to places, that nobody, nobody goes
You got me hooked up on the feeling
You got me hanging from the ceiling
Got me up so high I’m barely breathing
So don’t let me, don’t let me, don’t let me, don’t let me go

 You saw his cold blue eyes looked on you . He noticed you looking at him , making his smirk widen. Oh now you won’t stop . This was your chance.  Even if you were going to regret it later .

I need a gangsta
To love me better
Than all the others do
To always forgive me
Ride or die with me
That’s just what gangsters do
They do, they do, they do oh
To always forgive me
Ride or die with me
That’s just what gangsters do

Desire and passion was burning in your eyes as you sang the last words of the song . As soon as you were off stage you went to the bar . And sure shit enough,  Joe was looking at you , a shit eating grim on his face “dude not cool ! Why did you lie to me !” You yelled,  now regretting your actions.  He only laughed “Aww come on  (Y/n). You had fun didn’t you ” she smirked.

You were about to answer when one of J goons comes up to you “The boss what’s to speak to you (Y/n)” he said .

Great.  Now you were a dead girl walking.  You were scared . What if he didn’t like the show . What if he wants to fire you ore worse . How can you love this man ? He was so addictive . His looks , his smirk,  his deep voice . He really did drove you insane. 

Wight a sight you followed the man to J’s VIP room. 

As soon as you walked in he grined.

“Everyone out !” He ordered and soon only you and him in the room .

“ (Y/n) , (Y/n) , (Y/n) , (Y/n) ” he purred out your name as he walked to you . He got behind you and placing his hands on your shoulders he made you sit down on a chair.

“That was one of the best shows yet doll face,  I’m very pleased ” he whispered in your ear,  still behind you .

“I’m glad you enjoyed it sir ” you say . You could feel your heart beating like crazy and heat coming up to your cheeks . He slightly growled.

“Oh i did doll , but there’s one tiny thing , you don’t usually sing like that when you know I’m here . Why I’d that.  hmm~” he hummed now walking in front of you looking you in the eyes . “Tell me ~ Pretty please ” he asked.  He was playing with your mind . You slightly bit your lower lip.  A burning sensation in between you thighs . You wanted him so bad . And right now he was sexier that ever .

“I just didn’t want to make a mistake in front of you sir .” You say . His grin only widen. “Well aren’t you all shy and cute … so innocent … so beautiful ” he whispered his lips now almost touching yours . You couldn’t take it anymore.  You slightly moved forward,  locking lips with him in a kiss .

You didn’t know what you were doing anymore.  You realised what you were doing and jurked back,  almost falling off the chair “oh my God! ! I’m so so sorry sir !! I just …. I didn’t. … I just  ” you tried to find the right words to explain your self but before another word could come out of your mouth , he kissed you again . This kiss was rough but with a bit of passion and desire for more .

You couldn’t think anymore.  You let your body lose , doing anything it wanted . You pulled closer to him . At this his hands went up your thighs and under your legs , picking you up . You wrapped your legs around his waist as the kiss became more passionate . You wrapped your arms around his neck,  letting your hands slightly mess up his bright green hair. 

He slightly growled in the kiss and he sat back down on the red velvet couch . Now you were sitting in his lap as his cold hands wend up your dress . A light moan was heard from you making his smirk. 

When you finally parted you were breathing heavily,  looking in his insane eyes , now filled with lust just like your own .

“Now I see what you want dool face ” he pureed “ you always were my favourite doll weren’t you ? Such a pretty little thing . ” he whispered “and now you belong to me and me alone.  Say it . ” he said not taking his eyes of you “I belongto you and you alone ” you said still out of breath. 

“Now that a good girl.  Now how about daddy rewards you for being a good little doll . Hmm ~ ” he purred in your ear .

God why did this man drive you insane.  You loved every minute of this . You really were his . And you will always belong to him . You were his doll , his favorite girl , his most prised possession .  His all . And now you truly felt free .


 It’s been far too long since your husband spent quality time with you.

Genre: Angst, Smut

Pairing: Seokjin | Reader

Word Count: 2,403

A/N: I got carried away again yikes! I promise to stick to less than 1k words for the next drabble. (#18, 26, 38). Drabble list can be found here.

The house was finally empty and the truck was filled with brown cardboard boxes. It felt bittersweet leaving the house but you knew it was time for a change. “Don’t be too upset darling,”Jin whispered wrapping his arms around you. You gave a weak smile and let out a deep sigh as you felt a tug at your sleeve.

“Mommy are we going to the new house?”your daughter asked. You nodded getting out Jin’s arm but he hooked at the back of your belt loops. You walked to the truck giving the house one more look before getting in.

“Honey, why don’t you go with Yuna?”Jin asked opening the door. “It’ll be more safe,”he added when you began to protest. You sighed and walked to the other truck and got in.

“Why isn’t dad in this car?”your daughter asked.

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What Is Love? / Part 1

Exo as Wolves AU

Word Count: 1170


Minseok couldn’t believe what his brothers were making him do for his birthday.

“I really don’t need to go.” He said, waving his hands in front of him.

“It’s going to be great!” Jongdae smiled excitedly.

“Just cause you really want to go.” Chanyeol said.

“Like you don’t.” Jongdae retorted. “Just get in the car Minseok.”

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Supernatural BSM #39 They go with you to buy your first bra

Request: They go with you to buy your first bra

Age 13: The past year, you had received some hand-me-down bras from the occasional woman you and your brothers ran into on your hunts. They’d look at your ripped clothes in sympathy, as if it mattered whether there was a hole in the knee or not.

It didn’t matter to you. It’s not like Sam or Dean had better fashion sense. All you cared about was whether it kept you warm. And it always did. But the women didn’t agree, and more often than not, you found yourself with a plastic bag of clothes. Either their own or their daughter’s. Sometimes even a son’s. You grabbed the essentials, like bras and the occasional pair of pants, and then gave the rest to charity. If you kept all of the clothes you were given, the bunker would be overflowing with fabric.

You sniggered at the mental image as you toyed idly with a string on the bottom of your shirt. The seatbelt of the Impala was rubbing uncomfortably against your neck, leaving the skin angry and red, but Dean wouldn’t even start the car if you weren’t wearing a seat belt.

“What are you laughing at?” Sam asked from the passenger seat, reaching backwards blindly to pinch your leg. You laughed and pulled it out of his reach, kicking at his hand until he retreated. “Nothing.”

“You shouldn’t be laughing at us. You should be grateful,” Dean said sourly from the front as he steered the Impala into the shopping center parking lot.

“Oh I’m very grateful.” For this opportunity to see you looking awkward while buying a bra. You didn’t say that last bit aloud, simply smiled at Dean in the review mirror.

He grumbled something incomprehensible under his breath as he killed the engine.

“In, pick one quick, and then out, understood?” Sam scoffed at his brother.

“Get a grip, Dean. I thought you of all people wouldn’t mind a shop full of lingerie,” Sam teased as he got out of the car. Both you and Dean followed suit and you started the trek to the entrance.

“It’s no fun if there’s no woman in it,” Dean said in a flat tone, as if it was obvious.

“He’s just worried he’ll want to try some on,” you stage-whispered to Sam, who cackled loudly.

“That’s not true!” Dean cried.

Both you and Sam stopped at the defensiveness in his voice. “We didn’t think so before, but we sure as hell do now,” Sam told him and Dean groaned.

“There!” you said excitedly and pulled on your brothers to steer them into the lingerie shop.

“Can I help you?” a sales clerk asked. Her smile was small, but genuine when she caught your eye.

“Uh, yes, I need a bra,” you told her.

“Have you tried buying a bra before?” she asked.

“No. I don’t know my size or anything,” you admitted sheepishly, rubbing the back of your neck awkwardly. She laughed warmly.

“That’s quite alright. We’ll just get you measured. Is that alright?” You thought for a second she was asking your brothers, but she was still looking at you, and when you nodded hesitantly, her smile grew. “Don’t worry, I’m good at this.” She winked, and you found yourself thanking her internally. She was genuine and had a warmth to her that couldn’t help but make you relax. You guessed she may have been a mother.

“You gentlemen can go wait on the couch. I’ll find some stuff for her,” she said to Sam and Dean, and gestured at a red velvet couch in the middle of the room.

Dean coughed and cleared his throat, as if he wanted to say something, but then he turned on his heel and ran to the couch.

“I apologize, he’s a bit of a wuss,” Sam said before following Dean. Before the woman –Sally, her nametag said – lead you away, you saw Sam smack Dean upside the head.

Sally measured you quickly but certainly. When she was done, she smiled. “Alright. I’m assuming you’re looking for something plain?” You nodded. “I’ll go pick a few, you can try them on and then see which ones you like the best.”

You called a ‘thank you!’ after her as she disappeared. When she came back, she had four bras in her hand and a worried Dean behind her.

“Mr. Winchester, I already told you, we have a lot of males coming in and out of the store. Some buy for their girlfriends, and some buy for themselves. We even have some who buy for their boyfriends. It’s actually quite common,” Sally said indulgently, as if she was speaking to a child.

Dean flushed when he noticed you staring at him with a crooked eyebrow.

“Thanks,” he said hurriedly, before disappearing.

“He’s an odd one,” you told Sally apologetically.

“I deal with men like that all the time in this business. More often than not, it means they’re questioning their sexuality. Your brother is a classic example of a man denying he might be bisexual,” Sally told you.

After purchasing a few bras, you left the store. It wasn’t until you were sat in the Impala once again you broke. You started laughing so hard your sides hurt, and you had to grip your ribs to make sure you wouldn’t fracture one as you wheezed. A few tears were squeezed out of the squinted corner of your eye, and it took you several minutes to calm down.

“What’s going on?” Sam asked finally, a small smile on his face.

“She said Dean was a classical example of a man who was denying he was bisexual.”

Dean froze and his cheeks heated up. Sam chuckled, but was trying to keep his laughter at bay. “It’s not funny!” Dean snapped, but the corner of his lips quirked up slightly. You unbuckled your seatbelt despite Dean’s protests, and hugged his chest around the seat.

“You know we love you no matter what.”

“Easy there, that doesn’t mean I am bi.”

“We’re just saying we wouldn’t mind if you were,” Sam said with a shrug.

“Let me think about it.”