I Don't Wanna Waste My Time (Jimin x reader)

Originally posted by caughtinjimin

You stared at him sleeping, you don’t know if he still loves you, or why he’s even with you. You heard everything that the boys say, although you ignored the majority of their comments it still really hurt you. Your knees were tucked tightly to your chest, maybe he was only going out with you because he felt bad. You did try very hard to get his attention and to even confess to him, so maybe that’s why he felt bad. Should you leave?

 You shook your head trying to ignore the thought, you didn’t want to waste your time and even his, so what should you do? A small moan escaped his lips as he turned to his side away from you, you swallowed thickly as you reached your hand out to stroke his hair but you stopped yourself. There’s a reason why both of you don’t hug or kiss each other anymore. There’s a reason for everything. You blinked the tears away, you didn’t want to cry at night, you weren’t about that, but something has you really beat up. You gently got up from the bed and walked to the kitchen, careful not to wake anyone. 

Once you were in the kitchen, you grabbed a tub of ice cream and took a spoonful, maybe you were stress eating. You tried not to think of it for too long, or else you would end up feeling guilty. 

“Who is up?” You heard, you turned your face quickly to the voice, finding Hoseok. You then sighed and waved, he looked at you confused but still managed to chuckle. 

“Did I wake you?” You asked, Hoseok nodded while grabbing a spoon himself and started to eat the ice cream with you. 

“I was just beginning to fall asleep too!” He stated as he shoved the spoon into his mouth, you apologized quietly, making him feel bad, “It was a joke, in fact I was wide awake.” You rolled your eyes. 

“And I’m Batman, it’s ok you can say that I woke you up.” You said, Hoseok stayed quiet as he ate the ice cream with you. Maybe it was because it was late at night, or maybe it was because you were dying to know, but you began to talk. 

“Do you hate me?” You asked, Hoseok was taken aback by your question. 

“Do I what?” He asked​, “No, I don’t hate you! How can I hate you?” Hoseok asked, you shrugged while getting up and putting your spoon in the sink.

“I overhear you all talking, just letting you know.” You stated, Hoseok mentally cursed himself out as he sucked on his spoon nervously. 

“Does Jimin like me?” You asked, you turned around, “Has he ever liked me?” Hoseok sighed as he turned to look at you. 

“__, we all like you-”

“Don’t lie to me. Don’t you dare lie to me!” You yelled, you didn’t care if you woke up some of the boys, you wanted, needed and deserved answers. 

“Tell me so I can stop wasting my time and his!” You said, Taehyung along with Jin walked out of their rooms, wiping their tired eyes. 

“Hoseok? What’s happening?” Jin asked tiredly, he then saw you shaking and crying, “__? What’s wrong? Did he hurt you?” Jin asked, you shook your head while grabbing the tub of ice cream and throwing it in the freezer. You then walked past them and into Jimin’s room, you turned on the light and shoved clothes into a bag. 

“__, where are you going?” Jin whispered, you shook your head while grabbing your toothbrush and slipping on your shoes.

“You all don’t have to pretend to like me anymore! I’m done! I don’t wanna waste my time, I’m done. Goodbye." 

Staying at a cheap hotel was all you could afford, you sighed as you wringed out your hair in a towel and looked down at your phone, 0 messages and 0 calls.  

"I guess I was right.” You sighed, this sucked. There were no other ways to express this situation, it sucked. You felt like crying, but you also felt like ignoring it. Why didn’t you feel sad? How come it’s not bothering you as much as you thought? You only felt like crying, which was odd considering you didn’t feel like you were dying or like your world was going to end. Maybe you weren’t happy in the relationship. 

“Later in the day there will be heavy storms, so bring an umbrella!" 

You ignored the anchorman, and packed your clothes back into your bag and grabbed your hotel key, after dropping off your key and making your way to your car, you decided to go back to the dorms to pick up your belongings and leave. Once you got out of the car, you felt a heaviness in your chest, should you really be showing up? Maybe they would be kind and place all your things outside the door so you wouldn’t even have to look at them. Once you walked through the lobby and caught the elevator, you held your breath. 

"Breathe..” You whispered to yourself, you then saw the familiar door at the end of the hall, you began to shake, your knees felt weak and a lightness fell over your head. “Breathe…” You stated, your legs carried you to the door and your knuckles placed a firm but soft tap. After a few seconds of waiting, the lock turned and Jimin greeted you at the door. 

“We need to talk. Now.” He said, you nodded and walked into the dorm, the boys were sitting on the couch but upon seeing you they scurried into their rooms. You sat at the table and laced your fingers together in worry, Jimin handed you a water bottle in hopes to calm you. 

“Why did you leave?” He asked, you shook your head. 

“I’m here to get my things, then I’ll be leaving.” You said, Jimin then gave you a hard stare. 

“We’ve been together for so long, you’re not leaving.” He said, you shook your head and chuckled. 

“I am leaving, I’m tired of you just tolerating me!” You said, Jimin’s eyebrows knitted together. 

“You think I’m tolerating you? You think of me that lowly?” He asked, you bowed your head in embarrassment, were all the thoughts you were having just propaganda? 

“I do. I’m done talking, I’m going to pack my things now.” You said as you got up, once you shoved everything into a duffel bag, you looked at Jimin sitting down at the table, his stare straight ahead. 

“I’m sorry for not standing up for you.” Jimin stated, but before you could hear, you were out the door. Jimin then buried his face in his hands, “I should’ve cherished you… I’m sorry.." 

Desisti sim. Mas não porque sou fraco ou porque sou incapaz de continuar. Desisti porque foi preciso, por meu próprio bem, porque não me cabe mais suportar tanta dor. Desisti de me procurar onde não me encontro. Desisti de gastar minhas esperanças, porque tenho que me curar dessa dor, desse tempo que perdi lutando por algo que não me fez bem. Mas, não vou desistir de ser feliz do meu jeito, esse, de viver sem ter que desistir.
—  Des-venturar
Addiction (Namjoon x addict!reader)

Originally posted by choke-me-namjoon

  • Warnings: Self harm, drinking, anxiety attacks,cursing, this story will have a very heavy atmosphere, please read with caution.
  • I secretly wanted to make this, mostly because I struggle with self harm, and anxiety, and I wanted to make people who are going through this to remind them that someone does love you. Please enjoy.

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